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Why is Magnus the Red red?

Because he has 1000 suns

A Firewarrior and some Boyz Walk into a bar.
Bartender: What can I get for you...umm...gentlemen?

Fire warrior replies: I would like your finest Burger!

Boyz replies. MAKE OURS WITH MUSHROOMS!

Kid_Kyoto wrote:
A man walks into a bar, gets totatally $%!+ faced. Bartender throws him. He stumbles out right into the arms of two inquisitors. The Inquisitors just knock him over. He gets real mad and says "Do you guys know who I am, I'm the Holy Space Emperor!"
The first Inquisitor shakes his head and says "no you're not."
The second Inquisitor shakes his head and says "now get out of our way."
"No I am! And I can prove it!" He gets to his feet and walks into the bar, the two Inquisitors follow him.
Bartender says "Holy Space Emperor you're back?"

ROFL! Now I need to think of some.

EDIT: Woah, oops. Didn't see that the above poster had bumped a 3 year old topic. My bad.

A SM Captain, a Sister Superior, and a Comissar are all arguing about who has the bravest troops.

"I'll prove I have the bravest Men under my command!" says the Captain. "you!" He says, pointing to a Battle Brother, "Jump out the Airlock without your power armor on!" "Yes Sir!" and He jumps.

The Sister Superior points to a SoB and says "You do the same"

"Yes Mistress!" and she also jumps.

The Commisar points to a Conscript. "Jump out the airlock"

"No Sir!"

The Commisar smiles and pulls out his bolt pistol. "Now that, Is true courage."