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Mekboy wrote:The enmey is well defended all round, but is vunerable from the air.
Do you
A. Call in an airstrike.
B. Call in a small airstrike to confuse them, then attack from the front.

If you answered B, then you are a Spess Muhreen.

You got it wong Mekboy, true Spess Muhreen have the universal rule "And They Shall Not Know Tactics", so the small airstrike is out.

M.

G. Whitenbeard wrote:You are wearing armor. Is it:

A. Blue
B. Red
C. Green
D. Purple
E. Pink
F. Black
G. White
H. Yellow
I. Lavender
J. Mauve
K. Turqoise
L. Sea Foam Green
M. Grey
N. Silver
O. Peach
P. Orange
Q. Goldenrod
R. Sky Blue
S. Maroon
T. Gold
U. Lime
V. Egg Shell
W. Neon
X. Navy
Y. Stripped
Z. Polka Dotted

Answer - Any of the Above! As long as the armor you are wearing doesn't blend in with the surrounding environment whatsoever, or camoflauge you in the least, you're probably a Space Marine

Hey! My Eldar Scorpions are painted black with neon higlights and they are not Zpassse Murinnnnnns.

M.

What is 'camoflauge'?

A - A pattern or design that blends into the surrounding environment to make you harder to find.

B - Camoflauge is the color of cowardace! I want my enemies to see me coming and to know fear as I approach!

If you answered B... seek help.

Cheese Elemental wrote:You and your squad are cleaning up some half-dead Necrons after a battle, when suddenly they all come back to life and a Monolith comes over the hill backed by a legion of Necrons and a flight of Destroyers.

Do you
a) Scream 'The Monolith! We destroy that and this is over! CHARGE' and run at it firing your bolter as you go.
b) Fall back and call for reinforcements and an orbital bombardment.

If you answered a), you are a Spase Marien! Hurr!

And Mad.


And you copied that from DoW Dark Crusade. I know

Your drop pod has just hit the surface of a planet. You and your squad of Battle Brothers burst out and survey the situation. There is a squadron of Imperial Guardsmen desperately defending their Basilisks from Orks. You:

A- Take the squad's flamer, yell, and charge into the Orks, burning and smashing them all to death as your Battle Brothers follow your example.
B- Do as above, but afterwards kill the Guardsmen, blow up the basilisks and declare the rest of the Guardsmen heretics. You then leave the planet and blow it up from space.

If you picked B, congrats. Spaes Muuuureeen.

An enormous tide of orks is before you, stretching from skyline to skyline. You command all 1000 of your battle brothers, who stand together in arms against them, ready to stop the very tide itself.

Does you:
a.) call in hundreds of orbital strikes from the orbiting battle barge
or
b.) jump on a motorcycle, grab a few of your most trusted comrades, and do a pre-emptive strike against the heart of the Ork lines.

If you guessed B, you are up for promotion!

You are squad leader defending a point against the orks. Your squad consists of 9 Marines with 1 Heavy Bolter. Do you:

A: Charge the Orks, regardless of the fact that I'm packing heavy weapons
B: Stay back and tactically assess the situation

If you chose A, congrats! Speehs Muuurrreeeen!

To be fair, denying Orks the charge is a viable tactic.

Your squad is surrounded and you are low on ammunition and supplies. Do you say;

A) We're surrounded, Brother Marius get on the tac net and bring down da pain!

or

B) Men, we are surrounded. Theres no way they can get away from us now! For the Emperor! Dakka dakka dakka!

If you chose B congratulations! Your Davy Crockett!










oh yah, and your a space marine.

What do you say when you meet one of the Sisters of battle?

a) "Bring on the loving, cos let's face it chaps, we've been stuck on this space ship for fricking years. We're all men. There's a lot of pent up emotion. We have to be so aggressive all the time and kill every new person we meet. Sometimes, all I want is the gentle touch of a woman. Hold me......."

b) "Aaaaaaaaargh! Scary women! Run for your lives! Hide."

If you guessed b), you need to go and see the Space Marine Counsellorium to discuss your feelings of neglect from your only parent and how this has impacted on all of your future relationships.

That made me think... what's a good pick-up line in the Imperium?

"Hey baby, my plasma cannon's running hot and I need to purge you in the name of the Emperor tonight."

i like what g. whitenbeard said...
you and a titan are rescuing a squad of dissarmed marines. you encounter a warboss with 2 powerklaws.
do you:
a) Kick him in his balls tackle him and beat him to death with your hands.
or
b) Tell the titan to splat him with its vulcan megabolter.

If you answered a then congratulations your a space marine!
If you answered b then congratulations your a smart person!

You unquestioningly obey every order, regardless of how crazy it may seem, you might be...

a. a space marine
b. a tool
c. a prostitute
d. all the above

theocd wrote:You are approaching the enemy encampment and you have a Whirlwind battery at your disposal do you:

A) Bombard them into nothing and go in to check for survivors.
B) Artillery!!!! Who needs artillery when you have FISTS!!!!!!!! FOR THE EMPEROR!!!

If you chose b, you guessed it, you're a space marine

The OC-D

If you answer A then you've probably never felt the disappointment of using a Whirwind battery and hoping to hit something.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

Ratbarf wrote:

B) Men, we are surrounded. Theres no way they can get away from us now! For the Emperor! Dakka dakka dakka!

If you chose B congratulations! Your Davy Crockett!

Actually if you chose B you're General Lewis B. "Chesty" Puller, who was a Marine's Marine. Or in this case, Space Marine. (Hurr? What is hurr?)

Oh, I thought that quote came out of Disney's versino of Davy Crockett when they save the army from being surrounded by indians.

You are all alone surronded by 100s of orks, you have every weapon you could ever want and or need

do you
A. throw the weapons at the orks and challenge them to close combat
B. use the weapons to destroy them and sit back with a beer
if you picked A then you a Spess Muhreen

Cheese Elemental wrote:That made me think... what's a good pick-up line in the Imperium?

"Hey baby, my plasma cannon's running hot and I need to purge you in the name of the Emperor tonight."

That was gold... SIGGED!


Automatically Appended Next Post:

khornydakkadude wrote:i like what g. whitenbeard said...
you and a titan are rescuing a squad of dissarmed marines. you encounter a warboss with 2 powerklaws.
do you:
a) Kick him in his balls tackle him and beat him to death with your hands.
or
b) Tell the titan to splat him with its vulcan megabolter.

If you answered a then congratulations your a space marine!
If you answered b then congratulations your a smart person!

Orks don't have balls... And if they do then they just hold spores and are therefore useless/won't hurt to be kicked.

You are fighting traitor guardsmen when your bolter runs out you reach for a clip but there's none left
Do you:

a) Get out your combat blade out shout "for the emperor" and charge.

b) Pick up a lasgun and fight with that.

If you said a congrats your a space marine.

If you said c your a heretic for c wasn't a answer so you better watch out you'll be found out soon

You are a captain with a large fighting force about to engage a havily fortified enemy position do you

A) Assault the front gates
B) Attack a flank

If you answered B then you are not a spaze mureen, spaze mureens always assault the front

You are a trooper with a group of battle-brothers pinned down in a bunker, you have fire support behind you slowly eliminating your enemy do you

A) Wait for your fire support to clear your enemies so you can advance
B) Assault the front immediately.

If you answered A then you are not a spaze mureen, spaze mureens always assault the front.

You are a fast-attack unit, and you have an ideal high-value target sitting alone on a flank ready for you to kill, do you

A) Wait for the order to attack
B) Attack the target of opprotunity immediately, lest the target hide itself.

If you answered A or B you are not a spaze mureen, spaze mureens ALWAYS ATTACK THE FRONT.

you are surrounded by the enemy with no hope of reinforcements and no orbital bombardment available
Do you:

a)Run for your life screaming

b)Fight and take as many as you can with you knowing that your going to die

c) surrender

If you said b congrats your a space marine

If you said c or a you are not fit to fight you better hope that your leader didn't see you or else your dead

Your commander has just fallen to a hail of Tau Pulse fire.
Do you:
A.) Take cover, Call in reinforcements, and try to achieve fire superiority
B.) Rush his body, Put him on your shoulders, and fight through the Tau by hand.


If you said B, congratulations, You have been selected to become a space marine!
Now come 'ere so I can fuse your ribcage together.

You and your chapter have decided to take up the defense of a capital city besieged on all fronts by a ruthless Ork WAAAGH!. You've decided to place your chapter, at nearly full strength, high upon the rockcrete capital walls reinforced by numerous long range PDF artillery units and a full strength Imperial Guard legion. As you admire the sight of such a tactically sound and nearly impregnable defense made up of Space-Marine, Man, and Lasgun, you see the green ocean of Orks approaching fast. An Imperial Guard spotter yells that the Orks have moved into range of the incredibly accurate and deadly artillery units capable of cutting down Orks by the hundreds...

Do you:

A.) Give the order to fire, killing nearly four thousand Orks in the first strike alone, and yet another thousand once Bolter and Lasgun erupt from the wall in sync as the Orks lurk forward.
B.) Yell at the Guardsmen for being a coward, take off your helmet, grab a Jump Pack, and jump jet into the Ork charge engaging the scum in melee.

If you chose B, ur a spuce murine!

Ratbarf wrote:Your squad is surrounded and you are low on ammunition and supplies. Do you say;

A) We're surrounded, Brother Marius get on the tac net and bring down da pain!

or

B) Men, we are surrounded. Theres no way they can get away from us now! For the Emperor! Dakka dakka dakka!

If you chose B congratulations! Your Davy Crockett!

oh yah, and your a space marine.

I thought that was Chesty Puller?
"OK, they're to our north, to our south and on our east and our west flanks. They can't get away now!"

He also came up with:
"Retreat? Marines never retreat, we're advancing. To the rear."


Automatically Appended Next Post:
You're in a lightly armored skimmer shooing up some advancing enemy units when you're shot down!

Do you:

A - Jump from the skimmer yelling FOR THE EMPEROR! Thereby attacking the enemy's rear lines
B - Sit politely in your wreck as it burns around you since you are a crewman not an infantry man

If you answered B, congratulations! You are a Space Marine who's faith in his orders and his codex trumps all else!

While cutting down swathes of Xenos with your bolter, the clip dries out. Do you;

a) Reload and keep killing
b) try to reload and then relaise your cute little belt puch isn't actually big enough for spare clips - you only had the one that was loaded back in space. Realising this you employ your counter measures - throw your helmet at them.

If you answered b congratulations you're a spashul Marinnesz

you stare down a nid bio titan do you


a) fall back and call in for a orbital bombardment

or

b) get eaten by it only to rip its heart out with your bare hands

if you picked b your marc.... i mean a space marine yay!

covenant84 wrote:While cutting down swathes of Xenos with your bolter, the clip dries out. Do you;

a) Reload and keep killing
b) try to reload and then relaise your cute little belt puch isn't actually big enough for spare clips - you only had the one that was loaded back in space. Realising this you employ your counter measures - throw your helmet at them.

If you answered b congratulations you're a spashul Marinnesz

THE TERM YOU ARE LOOKING FOR IS MAGAZINE.
A CLIP AND A MAGAZINE ARE ENTIRELY DIFFERENT.

CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR FURIOUS.

Before you lies a swath of heretical traitors to the empire, each one filled with delicious meat. Do you

A) OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM

B) NOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM

You are not a space marine

If you randomly through yourself at the enemy with disrguard to self peservation, then You're a Space marine....

You've just read through a ridiculously stupid thread on Dakka.

Do you:

1) continue the thread by posting your own stupidity

-or-

2) just leave it be?

If you chose 1...

I can't be a Spess Mahreen because I'm a little girl, and that's not fluffy.