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actiondan wrote:According to popular belief I cannot use drop pods because only the Imperium can organize itself enough to put 10 men in a container and fire it at a planet.
Note: This is not sarcasm if you wondered. I agree with him.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/12/14 13:37:30
idolator wrote:That Nob is carrying a big honking gun that happens to have two barrels. You could call it a twin-linked shoota if you want, you could also call it Susan.
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
battle Brother Lucifer wrote:One day, I will write the sequel to the B&W SM on a B&W bike.
The wedding scene. Just imagine
I am going to ninja you
Edit: see below
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/12/14 19:53:48
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/12/14 18:36:16
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
I like that. i will add it since you came up with the idea.
The Black and White Space marine on the Black and White Bike: Part 2
There once was a Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike, and being the hero type person he was, wanted to marry the Chapter Master's daughter.
So after getting permission by going on a loooong quest, he was set to marry the Chapter Master's daughter and the day of the Wedding came.
They were standing before the Chaplain and the Chaplain said.
"Do you, the Chapter Master's daughter, take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be your lawfully wedded husband?""Yes, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
and the Crowd roared "not THE Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
"Yes, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike" roared the Chaplain.
and the Chapter Master's daughter replied.
"Do I take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be my lawfully wedded husband?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, or Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as we both shall live?
and the Chaplain replied, "Yes, Do you, the Chapter Master's daughter, take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be your lawfully wedded husband?""Yes, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
and the Chapter Master's daughter said, "I do"
and the Chaplian turned to the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike and he said,
"Do you, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike, take Chapter Master's daughter to be your lawfully wedded Wife?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
and the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike said,
"Do I, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike, take Chapter Master's daughter to be my lawfully wedded Wife?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as we both shall live?"
and the Crowd roared "not THE Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
and the Chaplain said, "YES!"
and the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike said, "I do"
and the Chaplain turned to the Chapter and said,
"I now pronounce this couple 'Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike and Wife"
"You may now extract the Geneseed"
and the crowd roared, "Not the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike and Wife"
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
That looks like you copy pasted it really wrong. Try:
"Do you, the Chapter Master's daughter, take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
and the Crowd roared "not THE Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike?"
"Yes, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike. So, Do you, the Chapter Master's daughter, take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
etc
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2010/12/14 19:57:57
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
battle Brother Lucifer wrote:That looks like you copy pasted it really wrong. Try:
"Do you, the Chapter Master's daughter, take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
and the Crowd roared "not THE Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike?"
"Yes, the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike. So, Do you, the Chapter Master's daughter, take the Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White bike to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"For Rich and for Poor?,"
"In sickness and in health?,"
"As Battle brother, Sergeant, Veteran, Captian, and Chapter master?,"
"Entombed in Dreadnought Sarcophagus and in Power Armor?,"
"For as long as you both shall live?
etc
Too lazy to do more, you do it.
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
Space_Potato wrote:How many Inquisitors does it take to change a light bulb?
Spoiler:
1 to change the bulb, 1 to cry heresy, and one to deny the existance of the lightbulb
S_P
There are many variations of this joke...
Dakka Bingo! By Ouze "You are the best at flying things"-Kanluwen
"Further proof that Purple is a fething brilliant super villain " -KingCracker
"Purp.. Im pretty sure I have a gun than can reach you...."-Nicorex
"That's not really an apocalypse. That's just Europe."-Grakmar
"almost as good as winning free cake at the tea drinking contest for an Englishman." -Reds8n
Seal up your lips and give no words but mum.
Equip, Reload. Do violence.
Watch for Gerry.
How many Imperial Fists would it take to screw in a light bulb?
40, one to screw in the light bulb and 39 to build a big fortress in order to protect the bulb from siege warfare.
How many Salamanders would it take to screw in a light bulb?
None; they just use flamers.
How many Iron Hands would it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, but not until he have made the bulb into a super-technological bulb with bionic implants.
How many Ultramarines would it take to screw in a light bulb?
Take as many as you want!
How many Dark Angels would it take to screw in a light bulb?
2, one to screw in the light bulb and one to find the fallen light bulb and make it repent.
How many Wite Scars would it take to screw in a light bulb?
16, one to screw in the light bulb and 15 to hunt it down on bikes in case it flees.
How many Grey Knights would it take to screw in a light bulb?
That depends completely on how many daemons there are inside the light bulb.
How many Techmarines would it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one, but he'll do it perfectly well.
How many Angry Marines would it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, screw the light bulbs!!
idolator wrote:That Nob is carrying a big honking gun that happens to have two barrels. You could call it a twin-linked shoota if you want, you could also call it Susan.
Space_Potato wrote:How many Inquisitors does it take to change a light bulb?
Spoiler:
1 to change the bulb, 1 to cry heresy, and one to deny the existance of the lightbulb
S_P
There are many variations of this joke...
Saintspirit wrote:Indeed there is.
How many Imperial Fists would it take to screw in a light bulb?
40, one to screw in the light bulb and 39 to build a big fortress in order to protect the bulb from siege warfare.
How many Salamanders would it take to screw in a light bulb?
None; they just use flamers.
How many Iron Hands would it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, but not until he have made the bulb into a super-technological bulb with bionic implants.
How many Ultramarines would it take to screw in a light bulb?
Take as many as you want!
How many Dark Angels would it take to screw in a light bulb?
2, one to screw in the light bulb and one to find the fallen light bulb and make it repent.
How many Wite Scars would it take to screw in a light bulb?
16, one to screw in the light bulb and 15 to hunt it down on bikes in case it flees.
How many Grey Knights would it take to screw in a light bulb?
That depends completely on how many daemons there are inside the light bulb.
How many Techmarines would it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one, but he'll do it perfectly well.
How many Angry Marines would it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, screw the light bulbs!!
I preffer the joke How many Inquisitors does it take to change a light bulb?
Spoiler:
1 to change the bulb, 1 to cry heresy, and one to harness the power of the bulb
faith is for the blind and those unwilling to look.
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
How many Slanneshi cultists does it take to Screw in a lightbulb?
Spoiler:
it depends on how kinky they feel and how tight they can sqeeeze in
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
O
I see what you did there
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
AbaddonFidelis wrote:how many space marines does it take to carry a meltagun? 10! get it! 10! hahahahhahahaha.... I kill me.
Now that was actually the first joke in this thread that I liked.
"We train young men to drop fire on people, but their commanders won't allow them to write "feth" on their airplanes because it's obscene!" (Colonel Kurtz in Apocalypse Now)
And you know what's funny? "feth" is actually censored on a forum about a dystopia where the nice guys are the ones who kill only millions of innocents, not billions.
Waiting for my shill money from Spiral Arm Studios
i didn't get it right away, and then it clicked.
Self-proclaimed evil Cat-person. Dues Ex Felines
Cato Sicarius, after force feeding Captain Ventris a copy of the Codex Astartes for having the audacity to play Deathwatch, chokes to death on his own D-baggery after finding Calgar assembling his new Eldar army.
Unlike other annoyingly reaccurring threads ("I Hate Tau" threads as an example), I actually don't get irritated by humor threads, as at least one or two posts unveils something new and enjoyable for a larf. So let me try and throw a joke into the ring that hopefully doesn't involve bees...
...The 4th Ed. Chaos Marine dex!
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/12/16 02:24:03
The Tau were mobilizing against the Imperial Guard.
But once the battle began they quickly became deterred. With so many human infantry using marker lights, they must be getting ready to fire something fierce.
Pen≥Sword wrote:The Tau were mobilizing against the Imperial Guard.
But once the battle began they quickly became deterred. With so many human infantry using marker lights, they must be getting ready to fire something fierce.
That one's good, it made me laugh while I was ordering my industrial towers.
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