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Beaviz81 wrote:Carrus duels a Dark Apostle for a while, he ends up slicing him open, balls to brain as he finally spots a weakness, while Ionza takes out a Veteran Sergeant of the Word Bearers, with first knife through eyes, then behading, and both were caught live on TV sort of. Everyone in the whole sector saw them take out the corrupted marines and they rallied millions of IG to the fight.

.......... I dont ask for much, but please keep it somewhat moddest. Things like that will not make for a ijntresting story in the end

I try, sorry, I kind of like the idea of Carrus going mano a mano with a death-machine and winning.

That in it self is not bad, but the plot you describe makes me cringe really. The paramters for the story has been sett, so try to keep within them, but that is just my opinion.

Relax he will be undermatched in every way, so when I finally get around to that, you would be amazed he even won.

Beaviz81 wrote:Relax he will be undermatched in every way, so when I finally get around to that, you would be amazed he even won.

Prove me wrong then. I will await the end result

The idea sounds good. Just make sure it is a dramatic and hard fought combat, not just,

'He punches the corrupt marine in half and stands triamphantly over its mess of a body!'

As long as it ain't that, you look to be on about the right track.

Yo guys, I don't think I'm gonna have the time to really write in this. Sorry. You guys have fun.

Oh fudge, well lets just put on hold until you have time then.

Agree'd. We can plan until you have time.

It might be awhile, you guys should go on without me.

Okay, I will do the Dark Eldar instead. Sorry Trondheim, I was drunk, no excuses really. I sort of like involving outside influences, and I'm good at writing Dark Eldar.

LoneLictor wrote:It might be awhile, you guys should go on without me.

Ah okay, may I as how long you assume it will be?

Beaviz81 wrote:Okay, I will do the Dark Eldar instead. Sorry Trondheim, I was drunk, no excuses really. I sort of like involving outside influences, and I'm good at writing Dark Eldar.

Np no harm done buddy.

I took the liberty of cooking up a bit more of my part of the story. feel free to provide C&C



Chapter 2.
There where some things that even made Hendric loose his temper, traitors and incompetent Planetary governors was on the top of this list.
“Do explain Lieutenant, just how could the entire PDF chain of command AND the planetary governor simply cease to respond to your transmissions ? I am assume you have tried and reach them in other ways?” said the fuming field marshal.

The lieutenant swallowed hard, and seemed to be steeling himself. Sweat poured down his face and his voice was marked by a man clearly afraid.
“We tried my lord, I even sent a platoon to investigate why the capitol had ceased to respond. None of them returned.”
pausing the young man steeled his himself and managed to look Hendric in the eyes while continuing his explanation. “ As acting commanding officer of the remaing loyalist PDF regiments I her by transfer command to you my lord. I submit myself to your judgement, whatever it may be.”

One could have heard a pin drop if it had not been for the hum of engines and the sounds of men & machines being unloaded from the landers surrounding the group.
Hendric looked at the man, what thoughts passed true his mind none could tell. His face was the surface of stone is always was, although his eyes had a different feel to them.
“I see. I applaud you for your honesty, and although your effectiveness is most definitely found wanting........ However know this, failure are not accepted.” he said and began to walk away from the group.

A loud crack filled the air followed by a dull thud as a body hit the ground. The shocked muttering of the remaing PDF staff mixed with the almost quiet sobs of the lieutenant who held a skinny woman in his arms, her head had a gaping wound on her forehead.
“Let that be a warning, the next time you will be the one facing the wrath of the Emperor coward. “ Lord Commissar Augustus who slid his bolt pistol back into its holster, his face not showing any sing of interest in the reactions of those who had served with the trooper he had just shot.
Now order would be restored and the foes of Mankind purged with fire and zeal. Now was the time for the hammer of the Emperor to strike at their cowardly hearths. And show them how the faithful waged their form of war.

Hendric S. Loki was a pious man, but he was also a realist. Having faith was good, but faith alone did not win wars for him and the Imperium. With this, he summoned the officers serving him. And the by now sombre and somewhat shocked lieutenant of the PDF.
“I do not need to brief you any further on what is facing us here on this heresy riddled world. Our task is simple, was are to break the heretics. And return this world to our Emperor.” pausing he drew his breath, and took a deep sip of water before continuing.
“We do however need the PDF to map out where our foes are hiding, you know this world better than us anyhow. And furthermore, we need your resources just as much.” with that the infamous commander gave a slight nod, and left his subordinates to plan their next move.

As he walked down the weary halls of the Administratium building they had set up their HQ in, his mind wandered, back several decades of warfare and bloodshed. His mind created a image of a woman with red hair and skin as pale as snow. He felt a sudden onset of weariness embrace him and he found himself longing for a moment of rest.
“I miss you still Emma, I will meet you again when I leave this world behind” he muttered to himself. He knew that he should have forgotten her long ago, but he would be damned before he gave her up. The Imperial Guard had provided for him and her, and even thou no one else remembered her he would until the day he drew his last breath.
His moment of solitude was broken when he heard the sound of voices, and the sounds of the daily routine of his men. Ever onwards he thought to himself and walked down the stairs and into the day that still awaited him outside.

While his lord was remembering old friends long dead and gone, someone else was making his presence felt in a different way.
Shadows moved true the broken landscape, silent and deadly they crept towards the traitors manning the defence strong point outside the massive hive city looming behind them.

These where the hallowed men of the Sturm troop divisions, these men where the absolute elite of the regiments. And none where more devoted to the Emperor and Mankind than them, now they once again used their skills honed on countless battlefields to ensure the will of their commander was carried out.
With hellguns and gleaming steel they stormed the bastion, the figth was grim but short. The foe lay dead and they stood victorious but none of them spared the fallen on any side a second thought. Demolition charges was set, and the the gas mask clad ghosts vanished into the night to report their success to command.

With these deaths the 134th Ragnarokian started its slow march to victory.

I thought this was more the idea-pooling Trondheim, I mean all of us committing our stories here would be a hell of a mottled thing as first you would write something about your Ragnarokian regiment, then LL would participate with his idea, and I would butt in with my regiment, and TheRobotLol will suddenly land with his Eversor just to complete the chaos.

By all cause I love your regiment Trondheim, even though I think the shooting of the female was a tad random by the Lord Commissar. Also getting shot in the head by a bolter tend to go like *splat there everyone present were showered by brain-matter and fragments of the skull unless contained inside a helmet* sounds like for me Augustus is using a hotshot laspistol or a hellpistol due to the damage described. It is of course a great read.

I agree with Beaviz. but still a nice and well writen piece of work.

Oh, and here's my first piece roughly. C&C apriciated.

Havelok drove an armoured knee into the Arbites midriff. The renagade crumpled, several ribs broken, a lung punctured. Havelok's power sword, crackling with blue lightning, flashes down into the Renegade's chest. Somewhere within the feeble carapace armour, Havelok could feel bones and organs being torn apart, the sword making its gory path through them. He relished the feeling. With a nightmarish screech, Havelok pushes his sword arm foward, impaling the man against a nearby Ferrocrete wall, blood flowing from his mouth as he finaly ceases living.

With a slight twitch of his neck Havelok turns to see the second Arbities hurriedly reload his shotgun, sweat running down the young man's face as his eyes widen in terror. With a daemonic laugh, Havelok spins around and drawing his weapon from the skewered and gore-soaked corpse, throws the short, crackling sword at the shotgunner. The blade flies straight and true, and plunges into his left shoulder, sending him flying backwards with a gurgling scream. Before the man can so much as move, Havelok is crouching beside him, needle-tipped claw raised. With one blurred motion the man's head goes flying across the street. Havelok gets to his feet slowly and reaches down to retrieve his energy-engulfed blade from the ravenged corpse.

With a casual glance, Havelok looks at the dozen or so mutilated Arbities bodies around him, each killed in under a second. He had just been playing with the last two. He sweeps the scene for any survivors, any witnesses. He finds none. Satisfied, Havelok turns round, sighting the Govenor's spire, resplendent with beauitiful lights and masterful architecture, as well as its diminutive neighbours. Havelok however had no time to admire the view, and begins the long walk towards his target.


(How was it, be honest!)

Ah I see, well then Il keep that in mind. But I must ask, do we just keep our stuff until we all deem it ready and done or what?

I liked it, I liked the description of the combat. It its an Eversor very well

Thank you. And I have no idea how we're gonna set this out.

I sort of assumed this to be some idea-pooling place, were we sort of just give background and come with ideas for our chars and regiments. I thought the story-telling would happen somewhere else.

I look forward to reading it all about the Eversor, to bad for the poor Arbitrator. But they tends to die a lot in my fluff as well.

Thank you. Should we individualy have threads or pool the results into another thread?

The fluff I think we can do ourself at least at first, but would be cool to eventually cooperate. For me, this thread is were I come with an idea, see the feedback, and from that I pen down my fluff.

TheRobotLol wrote:Thank you. Should we individualy have threads or pool the results into another thread?

I think this may be wise, it would make keepin track of it alot easyer

Which one?

Our stories in seperate treads. And that we keep this one for brainstorming and such, if its alrigth for you guys.

Sounds good.

It is agreed upon then. And I have a new friend it would seem.

Well I love that I have someone to discuss with, as that will keep me from penning down my more insane ideas.

And I'm very happy about the fluff I have read from all of you, so getting us together in an idea-pool was a great move.

This looks to be comming very well. When, if at all, is the deadline if anyone knows?

Deadline? Frak that, this is just a well-connected group that have the same ideals for fluff. That is our strength.

Nice. Very nice. And what happens when we complete our individual stories?

We will see I think, I sort of regard you as the place I come to forge good ideas.