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 sebster wrote:
And perhaps more importantly, the modern pizza was probably invented in New York, and New York certainly makes the best pizza in the world, so really Americans get to call it whatever they want.

Truer words never spoken on these forums.

 insaniak wrote:
It still messes with my brain that Americans call pizza 'pie'... Pizza isn't pie. Pie is awesome. Pizza is what a pie would be if you turned it upside down and removed the piebase.

Foreign devil knows not the greatness of pizza. Foreign devil especially knows not the greatness of NY or Chicago style. Its only our turpor after eating these thats keeps the American giant from conquering 2-10 countries at random at any given moment. Yum yum.

Kind of like maple syrup. If Canada didn't have maple syrup and donuts they'd control half the world. But you just can't get worked up if you've had two maple glazed donuts in the belly.

Now if we could combine maple syrup and good American pizza we could stop time completely. Yes! er wait...

Someone must have made pizza with maple syrup and bacon on it at some point, right? Please tell me this has been done!

If not, it wouldn't take too much effort to do.

"whistles nonchalantly"..hands in pocket...walking away...

 n0t_u wrote:
If not, it wouldn't take too much effort to do.

No indeed. I just hope that it's been done. I would be disappointed if it hadn't. Might well give this a try myself at some point.

"Ahem"

read spoiler

 Ouze wrote:
No one mentioned this, but after my wife hurt her back, she liked to get a cart to lean on while she walked around.

 sebster wrote:
The bigger question is why do people buy frozen pizzas? If you can't be bothered making your own pizza (and pizza may well be the easiest meal on Earth to prepare), and even if you don't care about the not-food they call pizza toppings, then you can get basically the same product from one of the chain food stores like Domino's for less money.

While I agree frozen pizza isn't particularly good, it's a lot faster and easier than making you own. If you make your own, you need to buy spaghetti sauce, cheese, and assuming you're going for minimal effort, a roll of Pillsbury pizza dough. These ingredients will be around $10, have no topping, and not taste better than a DiGiorno frozen pizza ($7). Then you have the effort of rolling out the dough, spooning on the sauce, etc, compared with simply opening the package and then removing it from the oven. So, DiGiorno frozen pizza wins on effort and and money, and if you get a nasty-ass tombstone pizza, it competes even better for money since those are like $4 apiece. If you can call that food.

Dominos\Pizza Hut and the other chains are comparable, since the delivery time (lets assume 30 minutes) is the same as baking time. Again, though, they can't compete on price - lets say $10-12 for a small pie, a tip, and possibly a delivery charge (and hell, maybe a $15 minimum order). Again, the DiGiorno is $7 making it a winner if you're feeding one or two people.

The only pizza chain that can compete totally is Little Caesars, which is take out only, but $5 a pie. The ensuing gastrointestinal distress is complimentary.

If you're paying that much, you're doing it wrong. Jar of sauce, $1.50. Small bag of cheese for one pizza, $3.00. Bag of pizza dough, $1.50. Combines to make a $6.00 pizza, plus cook time, and the size of that pizza will feed 2 people comfortably. Basically works to each person eating $3.00 worth of pizza, and one jar of sauce will make 2-3 pizzas, and a bag of cheese costs less as it gets bigger, so lets double: $1.50 for sauce, $5 for big bag of cheese, $3 for dough. That's $9.50 for enough pizza for 4 people. And if you have some extra seasonings around the house (not necessary), you can spice it up even more. A little bit of garlic butter around the crust with parmesan cheese baked in does wonders for pizza.

Could likely save even more by making it more from scratch and skipping the premade dough.

 Jihadin wrote:
"Ahem"

read spoiler

You ninja'd me! My internet seems to have gone all rubbish, so my posts are taking ages to finish.

 timetowaste85 wrote:

 Ouze wrote:
No one mentioned this, but after my wife hurt her back, she liked to get a cart to lean on while she walked around.

 sebster wrote:
The bigger question is why do people buy frozen pizzas? If you can't be bothered making your own pizza (and pizza may well be the easiest meal on Earth to prepare), and even if you don't care about the not-food they call pizza toppings, then you can get basically the same product from one of the chain food stores like Domino's for less money.

While I agree frozen pizza isn't particularly good, it's a lot faster and easier than making you own. If you make your own, you need to buy spaghetti sauce, cheese, and assuming you're going for minimal effort, a roll of Pillsbury pizza dough. These ingredients will be around $10, have no topping, and not taste better than a DiGiorno frozen pizza ($7). Then you have the effort of rolling out the dough, spooning on the sauce, etc, compared with simply opening the package and then removing it from the oven. So, DiGiorno frozen pizza wins on effort and and money, and if you get a nasty-ass tombstone pizza, it competes even better for money since those are like $4 apiece. If you can call that food.

Dominos\Pizza Hut and the other chains are comparable, since the delivery time (lets assume 30 minutes) is the same as baking time. Again, though, they can't compete on price - lets say $10-12 for a small pie, a tip, and possibly a delivery charge (and hell, maybe a $15 minimum order). Again, the DiGiorno is $7 making it a winner if you're feeding one or two people.

The only pizza chain that can compete totally is Little Caesars, which is take out only, but $5 a pie. The ensuing gastrointestinal distress is complimentary.

If you're paying that much, you're doing it wrong. Jar of sauce, $1.50. Small bag of cheese for one pizza, $3.00. Bag of pizza dough, $1.50. Combines to make a $6.00 pizza, plus cook time, and the size of that pizza will feed 2 people comfortably. Basically works to each person eating $3.00 worth of pizza, and one jar of sauce will make 2-3 pizzas, and a bag of cheese costs less as it gets bigger, so lets double: $1.50 for sauce, $5 for big bag of cheese, $3 for dough. That's $9.50 for enough pizza for 4 people. And if you have some extra seasonings around the house (not necessary), you can spice it up even more. A little bit of garlic butter around the crust with parmesan cheese baked in does wonders for pizza.

Cheese pizza? Thats godless communism right there.

Having made home made pizzas in the past it usually took a lot more than that to make a quality pizza. You need multiple toppings and good dough.
At the Frazzled household we actually don't have pizza very often as the wife is now glucose allergic and I'm just a fat bastard. But if we have one we're likely taking a microwave one as a base and then adding a couple of types of cheeses and ~2 metric tons of pepperoni. Also occasionally ham and pineapple.

I like some of the frozen pizzas better than Domino's or Papa John's. Little Caesar's pizza is the devil. Those are the only three close by my house.

@ OP: I've picked up a cart before then realized I was only there for one thing, but leaving an empty cart in the middle of an aisle is rather rude, so I just keep it and leave it at the front. But because I am who I am, I make sure to leave it in the center of the entry doors.

 kronk wrote:
I like some of the frozen pizzas better than Domino's or Papa John's. Little Caesar's pizza is the devil. Those are the only three close by my house.

@ OP: I've picked up a cart before then realized I was only there for one thing, but leaving an empty cart in the middle of an aisle is rather rude, so I just keep it and leave it at the front. But because I am who I am, I make sure to leave it in the center of the entry doors.

Hence the original term for 'Kronkin:" the contortions developed as one bangs into one of Kronk's left behind carts at the entrance which quickly develops a traffic jam. One enterprising rap singer later and its history.

Why buy a frozen pizza?

Because all you have to do is turn on an oven, open a box, and put it in.

You don't even have to interact with anyone to get it. You don't have to fire any higher synapses to accomplish this. You don;t have to prep it or work at it at all.

That is why. It is the ultimate convenience food.

Some people though forget to remove the plastic wrapping though

Cooking the plastic makes my house smell funny. It covers up the dead hooker smell, though...

 Jihadin wrote:
Some people though forget to remove the plastic wrapping though

No no they forget the cardboard bottom UNTIL ITS TOO LATE!!!!!

Frazzled wrote:Foreign devil knows not the greatness of pizza. Foreign devil especially knows not the greatness of NY or Chicago style.

Chicago doesn't have pizza; they have triangular-shaped lasagna. (which is delicious in its own rights- just don't call that eggless-quiche a pizza)

Only NY has pizza. If you can't fold your pizza slice in half and eat it while walking, then it has failed you.

I love Chicago Style pizza. If there was a restaurant near my house that sold it, I'd need one of those cranes to get me in and out of my home...

One laziness thing that really bugs me...

I live in a condo, I own it and all. The building is on a hill, I live on the top floor where it's 1 flight of steps to the top, or 2 flights of steps from the back entrance. I live in the front, so I wanna park in the front. There's 2 units behind me owned by elderly ladies that both park around back and climb up all those steps happily, even though they could park out front and only have 1 flight of steps to go up.

Directly under them in the back of the building are 2 people that rent their units.. in their 20's or early 30's, not sure.. but, they park out front taking up space for the people who are supposed to park there, because they're too lazy to walk up a flight of steps when 70 year old grannies have no problem with twice that.. And since they're youngin's, they always have guests taking up spaces too. One of em even has a habit of leaving junk mail he doesn't want on the floor by the mailbox, messing up the joint.

Renters suck.

 azazel the cat wrote:

Frazzled wrote:Foreign devil knows not the greatness of pizza. Foreign devil especially knows not the greatness of NY or Chicago style.

Chicago doesn't have pizza; they have triangular-shaped lasagna. (which is delicious in its own rights- just don't call that eggless-quiche a pizza)

Only NY has pizza. If you can't fold your pizza slice in half and eat it while walking, then it has failed you.

I'd have to agree with you on both points actually. Chicago style lasagna can be good (if i cdon't have to eat the dough) and I used to love the "pizza sandwich."

I'm not a fan of Chicago style dough though. The one I had (in Chicago) was too doughy for me.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 kronk wrote:
Cooking the plastic makes my house smell funny. It covers up the dead hooker smell, though...

I guess thats a positive.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 Necros wrote:
One laziness thing that really bugs me...

I live in a condo, I own it and all. The building is on a hill, I live on the top floor where it's 1 flight of steps to the top, or 2 flights of steps from the back entrance. I live in the front, so I wanna park in the front. There's 2 units behind me owned by elderly ladies that both park around back and climb up all those steps happily, even though they could park out front and only have 1 flight of steps to go up.

Directly under them in the back of the building are 2 people that rent their units.. in their 20's or early 30's, not sure.. but, they park out front taking up space for the people who are supposed to park there, because they're too lazy to walk up a flight of steps when 70 year old grannies have no problem with twice that.. And since they're youngin's, they always have guests taking up spaces too. One of em even has a habit of leaving junk mail he doesn't want on the floor by the mailbox, messing up the joint.

Renters suck.

Call a tow truck and have them towed.

 azazel the cat wrote:

Frazzled wrote:Foreign devil knows not the greatness of pizza. Foreign devil especially knows not the greatness of NY or Chicago style.

Chicago doesn't have pizza; they have triangular-shaped lasagna. (which is delicious in its own rights- just don't call that eggless-quiche a pizza)

Only NY has pizza. If you can't fold your pizza slice in half and eat it while walking, then it has failed you.

Have you had St. Louis Style thin crust pizza? http://imospizza.com/

Looks utter and complete crap... but, strangely addicting...

 Easy E wrote:
Why buy a frozen pizza?

Because all you have to do is turn on an oven, open a box, and put it in.

You don't even have to interact with anyone to get it. You don't have to fire any higher synapses to accomplish this. You don;t have to prep it or work at it at all.

That is why. It is the ultimate convenience food.

This. I mean, wasn't this thread about laziness in the first place?

Also, pizza is by no means the easiest food to prepare. That honour goes to fries.
Chop potato into fry-shaped pieces (or cut it, whichever you prefer). Drop in hot oil for a few minutes. Done. If you're feeling fancy you could take the extra effort to peel the potato.
Unless you count apples and other fruits which take literally 0 effort to prepare, as you just eat them.

Bran Dawri wrote:

 Easy E wrote:
Why buy a frozen pizza?

Because all you have to do is turn on an oven, open a box, and put it in.

You don't even have to interact with anyone to get it. You don't have to fire any higher synapses to accomplish this. You don;t have to prep it or work at it at all.

That is why. It is the ultimate convenience food.

This. I mean, wasn't this thread about laziness in the first place?

Also, pizza is by no means the easiest food to prepare. That honour goes to fries.
Chop potato into fry-shaped pieces (or cut it, whichever you prefer). Drop in hot oil for a few minutes. Done. If you're feeling fancy you could take the extra effort to peel the potato.
Unless you count apples and other fruits which take literally 0 effort to prepare, as you just eat them.

near lazy enough:
1. more lazy. Buy precut fries. Cuts out the middle man.
2. even more lazy:get the precut microwaveable box version. Throw in microwave for 2 minutes. Done.
3. Laziest: ask wife to pick some up on the way home. LAZY MAXIMUM FATALITY!*

*This one I learned from the kids.

I add meat and spices to my frozen pizzas... chicken breast, roast garlic.... some other little things...

That's negating the laziness right?

 azazel the cat wrote:

Frazzled wrote:Foreign devil knows not the greatness of pizza. Foreign devil especially knows not the greatness of NY or Chicago style.

Chicago doesn't have pizza; they have triangular-shaped lasagna. (which is delicious in its own rights- just don't call that eggless-quiche a pizza)

I would agree with this, based on the lumps of vaguely-pizza-shaped melted cheese that we had at Adepticon. I think there were two different 'pizzas' there, but I couldn't really tell since they both tasted the same.

 Frazzled wrote:

near lazy enough:
1. more lazy. Buy precut fries. Cuts out the middle man.
2. even more lazy:get the precut microwaveable box version. Throw in microwave for 2 minutes. Done.
3. Laziest: ask wife to pick some up on the way home. LAZY MAXIMUM FATALITY!*

*This one I learned from the kids.

1 & 2 are true for laziness, though the little bit of extra effort in cutting the 'taters improves the taste no end.
Much easier, and just as lazy at least as #1, get those tiny potoatoes we Dutchmen call Parisian potatoes and fry them instead. (No idea what they're called in English.)

For #3, I'd have to get me a woman. That sounds like (insert sound of disgust) effort.

 timetowaste85 wrote:

If you're paying that much, you're doing it wrong. Jar of sauce, $1.50. Small bag of cheese for one pizza, $3.00. Bag of pizza dough, $1.50. Combines to make a $6.00 pizza, plus cook time, and the size of that pizza will feed 2 people comfortably. Basically works to each person eating $3.00 worth of pizza, and one jar of sauce will make 2-3 pizzas, and a bag of cheese costs less as it gets bigger, so lets double: $1.50 for sauce, $5 for big bag of cheese, $3 for dough. That's $9.50 for enough pizza for 4 people. And if you have some extra seasonings around the house (not necessary), you can spice it up even more. A little bit of garlic butter around the crust with parmesan cheese baked in does wonders for pizza.

If you like a cheese pizza, that's great. I want onions, green peppers, and pepperoni on my pizza. It's now a $10 pizza, and I have to cut veggies.

I'm not generally lazy, but here's how I look at it: If I'm going to half-ass food, I'm going to completely half-ass food. I'm buying a frozen pizza because I know it sucks, but I want to literally toss it in the oven and forget about it for 20 minutes. I don't want to spend 10 minutes on it making it one that sucks less, I want to spend 0 minutes on it.

If I want a pizza that is good, then I'll make dough from scratch, sauce from scratch, roast some cloves of garlic, and then enjoy my bad-assery several hours later once it is complete.

I also bake my own bread. Since I started doing that, I haven't even eaten store-bought bread. It takes me about 4 hours or so, but there's just no comparison, and the price of salt+flour+yeast+water is literally pennies on the loaf, unlike a $10 pizza I have to do some of the work for.

I get the idea of not having time, or being lazy. I also get the idea of fabricating amazing food from scratch. I don't get the middle ground.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 insaniak wrote:

I would agree with this, based on the lumps of vaguely-pizza-shaped melted cheese that we had at Adepticon. I think there were two different 'pizzas' there, but I couldn't really tell since they both tasted the same.

Where did you guys go? Last time I remember Chicago style pizza (actually while in Chi-town), it was basically a loaf bread with an added feature plopped on last minute of cheese, sauce, and pepperoni.

It was fantastic.

 The Airman wrote:
In this thread: researching why someone would take a cart for one item.

We should apply for a grant.

_Tim?