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Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

Thanks guys. I don't know if I'd call tiny a Mek exactly. All that interest in alien tech just gives him ideas and he invents gadgets. I just wanted another way to make the huge muscley guy a bit more cerebral.

Never played black crusade so I don't know how the character sheets and skills and things work out. If Mek is a type or inventor is a skill then that's great.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/05/22 05:21:40

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Hey Guys sorry this took so long to work on I just graduated high school so life has been strange

Under a night sky in Armageddon drunken ork war songs could be heard throughout the entire camp as some Goff Warboss killed some space marine Ghazkull had wanted dead for a while, the fight was good so the entire camp and the neighboring Blood axe and Deff skull camps were to drink to him, a seemingly good excuse for the orks to throw a right good party. Around a small campfire near the scrap metal walls sat an ork drinking from a horn full of fungus mead on top an ammunition crate. Sitting all around his feet were perhaps a dozen or so Gretchen who sat attentively with open eyes and raised ears.

Roit, lissun up ya grotz! I'z gunna tell ya of da gray-test Kommando wot eva lived. Wun day, yooz gonna fink bak to dis storee, an' remembuh how useless yoo iz!
It all started on da day Big Mek Nubzappa woz smashed ta pee-sez by a big spikey 'umie!

*wot waz iz name da Kommando?*

I’ll tell ya hiz name wuz and iz Bigrippa da biggest and meanyest kommando dat evah lived. He eats fire and spits Dakka. Dem chaos boyz took all of Nubzappa’s crew and his kroza, and dey made lotz of biggah Orkz do un-orky fings loik braidin spikey 'umie "hair" and paintin fings "pink". An ovvah stuff Iz can't say.
Now, da Kommando had enough of dis, and he decided to teach em what beain an ork means.



'E 'ad ter blow up da engines, loik KABOOM, and get off da ship somehow. First, Bigrippa had to steal his favorite Big Shoota DoomDakka from da armory where dat purple git hid them. For da secod bit of da plan he got intuh a barrel full of purple berriez. Az we all know, purple iz da sneekeyest colour evah. But deez berries wouldn't stick to 'Im. So Bigrippa used DommDakka to make arm an' leg holes for him, so Bigrippa could wear the barrel, an' stay purple 4evah!

But wouldn’t da barrel be eavy



Were waz I? Oh, roit! First, ‘E… Wait, dat’d be Sekund..

I thought the barrel woz second?*




Good. Third, Bigrippa started sneekin’ about, assassss… assassin… assbandit. Got it! Assassinate. Bigrippa started assassinatin’ everyfing in sight! ‘E wood sneak up behind a target, jump out da barrel, put da Big Shoota at their spinez, pul da trigger an’ yell DAKKADAKKADAKKA!! Eventually dem chaos boyz figured out what I was, er I mean what he was up ta. So he leaped out da barrel and brought da dakka to da bajillions of mahrens dat tought dey could take em. But Bigrppa just made Squig meat out of dem. Once all dem chaos boyz wuz iva dead or runnin, our hero made hiz way to da engine room. The engine had all sorts of glowy bitz and spinnin gubbinz, so he deactivatied it wif his shoota. From dere he killed even more purple gitz who tot dey could take em but dey couldn't keep him from dat tellyporta. From dere he lit his cigar and tellyported back ere to Armageddon.

The ork looks pleased as the Grots look at him with wonder or skepticism and some a mixture of the two. But just as the Grots were beginning to applaud a hooded ork apears from the outskirts of the campfire's light. The ork began slowly clapping.
Das a mighty fine story BigRippa too bad it's more imaginary than a Deathskull's courage. The seated ork rose violently

Why don't you Zog off Squig Squeeza aint enough grots ere for a glove.

The second ork look to the Gretchen.
You lil Runtz wanna know why dey call em Bigrippa?

Why? Ahhh!

Bigrippa promptly kicked the offending grot into the tree line. Squeeza laughed and continued

Es cus da git ripped a hole in is trousers in front ov da boss.

The Gretchen began laughing and this infuriated Bigrippa

Lemme tell ya what really append dat day
So dem mahrens dat call dem selves da Emperah's boyz did nab dat Krooza however dere was only like tree Space mahrines da rest were just crazy umies. Dis Git bitten loser forgot to mention dat he didn't ave nofin to do with getting to dat dakka, if Gadnuk and da Gutrippas wouldn't av boarded dat ship an free all dem boyz dat zogged up and got captured e'd be feedin some umie baries right now. He also firgot to mention dat we weren't supposed to blow up dat Krooza we wuz gonna bring it back ere.
Not ta mention dat he blew da kan up by accident. Ya see when he got is precious DoomDakka back e wanted ta get revenge on dat chaos Boss. So e cornerd da git in da engine room and let loose wif da Dakka. But he must've zogged up somfin important cus just den da fing started fallin out of Orbit. We found him dere laughin over dat chaos boy. Just den Gitfinfaz knocked em out and Blackrog was gonna take his Shoota when Gadnuk stops em sayen dat e ad potential. Potential to be a zog up I say.

BigRippas fury sermed to turn to joy. He chugged the rest of his fungus mead and let out a sound of refreshment. He then threw the horn at Squeeza knocking him to his back. He then turned back reaching for DoomDakka, but as soon as he turned around aiming the excessively large barrel he realised that there was someone big in front of him. The Nob calmly removed the big shoota from his hands then back hand slapped the ork sending him to the ground. SquigSqueeza had finally got up and came charging at BigRippa with a large Knife. Without turning around Gadnuk elbowed him square in the face also sending him to the ground.

Lissin ere ya slimy lil gitz you don't kill each other unless I tell ya to, av I made myself clear.

The orks groaned in understanding.

Good now start drinkin till ya forget why you wuz mad das an order.
We ship out wif dat Freebooter tomorrow and I can't av no animosity between da two of ya.

The nob refilled his tankard at the cask lit his cigar and walked off to another bonfire.

This message was edited 3 times. Last update was at 2015/05/28 23:00:23

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Hey everyone sorry I've been gone wanted to look at who we had again.
We have our Nob Gadnuk
Squiggit da Sneeky Squig Squeeza
Blakrog da Boom maker
Old SkagNet da Saboteur
Tiny GitFingaz da tinkerer
Bigrippa da eavy weapons boy
that brings the total up to six I would still like four more if possible if anybody would be interested I would like a write up of the following.
An ork assassin (kind of like Styx in style)
a Burna Boy
a Warkopta pilot
a second in command sarge-git ork
anyone is welcome to any of these characters or welcome to include any original orks they come up with. ( don't worry about going over ten there is room )Happy writing.
Made in us
Master Shaper

Gargant Hunting

Don't feel too bad on not being too active. Also, congrats on graduating, happy for ya. I might take a shot at the Styx assassin, just gotta look some stuff up first.

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

Nice re-write. I missed the bit about using more dakka to slow his descent though. Thought it was super funny, especially as a tall tale.

Also, I've got another one... Sorry, I just can't help myself when it comes to Ork fiction.

He's not really going to fit on your new list though. He's a different sort of saboteur. Maybe one of the existing characters could fill a gap. Make Squeeza the second in command maybe. Or just add him to the list of alternate PCs.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2015/05/29 13:00:44

Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

Bloodaxe Kommando Nixmek BlagNabba

Bloodaxe BlagNabba was never a BigMek nor even much of a Mekboy. He was what some orks might call a spanna or a fixa. He ran a little fixzit shak bordering Snakebite territory where less technologically minded orks might bring their crude wagons and broken down engines to benefit from his "Bloodaxe know-wotz and teknikal eksperteez"
BlagNabba's somewhat disreputable services were nonetheless profitable, trading more often for squig-meat, grox hides or boar furs than for teef; he wasn't getting rich but he was fat and happy. Happy that is until he ran afoul of the local Snakebite Wierdboy Shamon Shagrat. Shagrat claimed that BlagNabba had been taking advantage of his Snakebite neighbours for too long, preying on the ignorant and never really fixing anything properly. That day he put a curse on the Bloodaxe spanna chanting in a trance and rattling his boar-tusk wand before clobbering BlagNabba over the head with it. BlagNabba laughed him off and slammed the door of his fixzit shak in the wierdboy's face.
For days and nights the sound of par-toolz and hammering could be heard coming from within the fixzit shak then all went silent. When BlagNabba finally emerged dazed and haggered he opened his door and it promptly fell off its hinges. He staggered out and dropped the door handle in the yard as the walls and roof of his fixzit shak fell in behind him. Every bolt, nut and nail had been removed, detached and dismantled from every engine, machine, fixture and fitting in the entire workshop.
Much as he has tried, BlagNabba has never since so much as screwed another nut on another bolt. Shagrat's curse followed him like a lost squig hound. "NixMek" as he came to be known could no longer build, only dismantle. As a fixa he was washed up, and there was never much call for a dedicated dismantling service in a society where destruction is second nature.

NixMek left in search of another line of work and soon found GadNuk who thought he had the perfect job for this hapless Bloodaxe. 

NixMek's first test came on the eve of "da Evil-Sunz Jambooree" a huge event where all the speed freaks and Big-Meks compete, and vai for social status.

GadNuk led NixMek to an unremarkle if large storehouse and, while SquigSqueeza kept watch; inky black in the darkness, they snuk inside. The building belonged to GorFlash Zagsta a prominent Evil-Sunz BigNob and odds on favourite for "da flat-out dash", one of the most prestigious challenges of da Jambooree.  Housed inside were six warbikes and a pair of battlewaggons all dripping and shiny in their new coats of fresh red paint the vehicles lay ready for action the following night.
Gadnuk clasped his hands in malicious anticipation.
"alright NixMek. Looks ta me like dese 'ere engines need fixin'"

"but Boss I..."

"I know wot you iz good for!" Gadnuk hissed "We don't 'ave all day, so get ta work!"

Gadnuk allowed his charge only a short time on each vehicle finding that the real damage was done in the early minutes and after that NixMek settled into the minutea of nuts, bolts and springs. Gadnuk pocketed some choice items, piston rings, timing belts and spacers while mixing up the items in the piles of parts that NixMek left beside each engine.
It was sabotage, pure and simple and NixMek had a talent that went beyond skill. He posessed an uncanny knack for finding the most critical bolt, the lynchpin of any machine and removing it.
At the "Evil-Sunz Jambooree"  GorFlash and his cronies watched from the stands, wringing their hands and cursing in frustration as their rivals stole the show. No-one noticed the only two Bloodaxes in the crowd laughing in their sleeves with red paint on their fingers and ill gotten winnings in their pockets.

"We'z gonna get cort red 'anded, Boss!" NixMek worried, glancing nervous eyes at his angry victims. "Deys gonna find out!"

"'course dey will..." Gadnuk smiled and patted the giant bulge of teef in his pocket. 

"But, by da time dey cumz lookin' fer uz, we'll be croozin da stars."      

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Great story I especially love the premise of causing trouble right before they ship out,
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Ok I wrote one and it came out to long and I wrote while I was really tired, so it all made sense in my head let's see if it transfers over.
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Sarge-git Bonebleeda
It is common knowledge how the chain of command flows in ork society the biggest ork is the boss. However Gadnuk never bought into that. Gadnuk has seen first-hand that the biggest doesn't always win. So when he named a goff boy who was the fifth biggest boy in the mob his second in command he received a plethora of side ways glances from many other boyz and even other kommandos. However the day Gadnuk met bleeda he knew that was a boy he could trust with his Gutrippas.

Ghazkull was fresh back from krumping the stars and Armageddon was about to become every ork's dream. Truly these were the best days of Gadnuk's life, he had just been given command of his own mob and Ghazkull Thraka the Beast of Armageddon had come home. Gadnuk had a admiration for Ghazkull in fact he was probably one of the few non blood axe orks he respected. However with the return of Ghazkull meant the return of the old Mad Dok Grotsnik, the dok and Gadnuk had met many of times before, and they were in a weird way friends.
The first run in they had was way back when Gadnuk was a stormboy, you see Gadnuk's nob commander a bloodaxe by the name of snugbite had his rokkit pack malfunction causing him to fall at least 50 feet from the sky. Him and the rest of the boyz dragged him to the clinic of the mad dok. Grotsnik took the corpse and not an hour later snuggbite came stumbling out of the clinic. He was frothing at the mouth, speaking gibberish, missing a most of his teef, and had a giant metal bit in his head but he was still good enough to use his Rokkit pack and without a word to Gadnuk or the stormboyz took off south followed by the two other boyz at the clinic. It was at that point when Grotsnik pulled Gadnuk to the side to speak.
"If I waz youz I'd find a new nob ta fight fer"
The dok laughed and said "cus he don't ave dis no more" the dok had proceeded to lift a jar with what presumably was Snuggbites brain.
" But ow is dat zoggin possible"
"E as a squig in dere now keeps em movin. Sure he's a better fighter now but I'm shocked e could use dat pack still" Gadnuk had no clue what to say it's not like he particularly like Snuggbite. The dok slushed the juices in the jar and spoke dastardly "I've got a deal fer ya storm boy, fer every one of deez you bring me I'll give ya five teef." Gadnuk was always on the look out for opportunities to make some teef so Gadnuk told him he was in. That was the start of the strange friendship between the two. Oddly enough Gadnuk never bothered to ask what the brains were for he figured he didn't want to know, but over the years he must have brought Grotsnik hundreds of brains yet he always never seemed to get enough of them.
But I digress that is another story.
Our story takes place the day Ghazkull lead the assault on hive Tartarus. The main entrance to the hive city was only accessible through a narrow canyon pass so small that no vehicle bigger than a small tank could go through and even then only single file. But at the mouth of this canyon stood a single free blade imperial knight. Dok Grotsnik was tasked with personally taking out the knight by Ghazkull who had got word his old friend Yarrick was out in the north waiting for him. So Grotsnik charged wave after wave of deff skull cyborks into the titan to no avail. Eventually the blood axe Warboss Bonneyparts told Grotsnik of a cunning plan he had cooked up. Grotsnik liked the plan and what would be known to the blood axes as operation "Stomp da Stompa" was under way. And it was here that Gadnuk had met Bonebleeda for the first time.

Gadnuk along with seven other Nobz were all gathered in what was known to Kommandos as the WAAAGH! room. The room was small a few chairs all sat facing a chalk in the front of the room. The board itself had a rather artistic rendition of a deff dread tearing a space marine in half. Gadnuk knew or at least recognized most of the nobz in the room. Many of them were just like Gadnuk former Red Skulls who got big and now command there own units. But the ones who really grabbed Gadnuk's attention were the only two non blood axes in the room. Korporal GruntKilla of the Black Skull Kommandos and Leftenut Bonechewa of the Bonebreakas both of whom are Goffs. Grunt had always been jealous of Boss Snikkrot's position as Ghazkull's favorite kommando, While Bonechewa was a two bit amateur who thought that Blood Axes were inferior Kommandos to Goffs, it was for this reason Gadnuk always made sure to inconvenience, sabotage, and irritate him when ever possible.

Just as Gadnuk had finished tieing Bonechewa's boot laces together just then boss Bonneyparts came walking in flanked by dok Grotsnik. Every Blood Axe stood at attention when Bonneyparts spoke, "as you know the omies got dem selves a stompa and so far it's been krumping our boyz right good. Dat ends today you and kommandos are gonna zoom in from da east and west on trukks, while he's focusing on the distraction to da north. Ya see da dok will send another wave of cyborks at em while the the 8 of you use the harpoons mounted to da trukks to hold da git down while da tank bustas move in and do their job. But make sure at least two trukks go to each arm other wise you'll just get blown to bitz." Bonneyparts explained all the positions on the chalkboard. When Bonneyparts dismissed the group Bonechewa got up too fast and fell over causing everyone to laugh and making Bonechewa storm out. Gadnuk shared some eager words of excitement with Grotsnik, Gadnuk had never seen da omiez stompas before and he would get to break one. Grotsnik was just as excited he was hoping to use the bitz from the titan to make a new model Killakan. Gadnuk explained the mission to the Gutrippas and they were off.

The boyz had loaded up BlagNabba couldn't fix vehicles anymore but he was still the best driver out of the lot, Rippa took the harpoon and the rest of the boyz were there to riding in the back. It took 30 minutes for them to reach the rendezvous and here is where Gadnuk met that crazy ork how would become his new sargegit. To the left of Gadnuk's trukk were the Bonebreakas and to his right the Black Skulls. They sat in the tree line waiting with their engines off to remain stealthily. They waited a grueling 45 minutes before they heard the horns sounded and shouting of WAAAGH! could be heard in the distance. They began racing for the titan wheels crushing gravel and small animals. Finally the target was insight and was fully focused on fireing at Grotsnik's cybork lootas. The plann was going perfectly the titan hadn't noticed them until the harpoons were already sticking it, the harpoons hit their marks pulling the knight's weapons back rendering it helpless and soon the knight would be pulled to the ground. They had brought the behemoth down to one knee untill Boom the Bonebreakas trukk just blew up the engine must have been running too hot. Gadnuk began to shout "Zog Bonechewa and his boyz are down fire Rokkits at da knee" Blackrog pulled the rokkit launcha and let loose. The Rokkits seemed to be no use. But as Gadnuk looked at the remains of the Bonebreakas trukk he saw a few orks crawl out of the wreckage. One of them began to run away when an ork smaller than him punched him in the gob. The ork spoke in a voice so powerful that it could be heard over the roar of engines and grinding of metal. " We get dis zoggin mission done no matter what and you gitz would run off like a bad moon wif a belly ache, pathetic" just then he picked up the nobz claw "are ya wif me" the surviving Bonebreakas replied with a powerful "WAAAGH!" They raced for the harpoon that dangled off the side of the walker and they began to pull. Forceing it back to one knee. The Tankbustas should have been here by this time, but soon one of the blood axe trukks stop running, Gadnuk realized they would all be out of gas soon. Then Gadnuk knew it was now or never. "Blackrog give me da biggest boom ya got" without a word he tosses Gadnuk a looted melta bomb. Gadnuk jumps out the trukk and races for the walker. Bonebleeda seeing what must be done orders his men to hold the harpoon and begins to climb the knights leg just as Gadnuk does. By the time they reached the shoulder the titan is on both feet and about to free his arms. But the two reached the top and Bonebleeda is able to rip the door off with his claw while Gadnuk drops the bomb in the cockpit. The bomb detonated and the titan fell foward. When the dust settled Gadnuk and Bonebleeda walked away unscathed. All the Kommandos began to cheer as they watched them walk away. But just then they heard an explosion the canyon pass was collapsed. Most of the orks had forgotten about the pass but still it was a good fight.

Mid all the cheering and drinking Bonechewa was apparently not dead. The ork came marching up to Bonebleeda shouting "Ya sniveling little Runt how dare ya take my Zoggin klaw and try to usurp me for my Bonebreakas I'll I'll." Just the a harpoon burst through Bonechewa's throat. Gadnuk used the rope to pull the harpoon from the ork and looked over to Bonebleeda. " I don't fink I know yer name." Bonebleeda smiled wickedly "it's Bonebleeda, Bleeda fer short" "Well Bleeda you want to be a Gutrippa" he answered nonchalantly "Better than a zoggin Nobless Bonebreaka" Gadnuk severed Bonechewa's head "I fink we'z gonna be good pals you and I, now I got to see da dok about dis guy"

This message was edited 3 times. Last update was at 2016/08/20 07:30:46

Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

Man, nobody wants to be a Nobless Bonebreaka!

Glad that guy didn't get decap'd by his own klaw, that would've been too poetic. The real important element for me in Ork fiction is animosity. It's good to see some good old green on green foul play going on here. It's what makes Ork society tick.

I enjoyed BlagNabba's mention, feels like he just rolled a driving skill for his post-game Gorkamorka Advance Roll.

And I love the name BoneBleeda! It just oozes natural brutal authority.

Made in us
Master Shaper

Gargant Hunting

Sorry for the delay, I almost have the character done, mind you, it's a decently long story, but I haven't been working on it as often as I should have been. I just need to wrap it up, and. I can send over your Styx assassin. I felt like a quick update was necessary as I haven't gotten the character out yet, thanks for the patience.

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
Made in us
Master Shaper

Gargant Hunting

Once again, sorry for the delay with this one. I hope I represented the characters I used accordingly to how their rightful creator wrote them. Anyway, here, I present, Grimsnik, da Sneekee assassin ork.

Grimsnik stared at the map, looking for potential entryways into the massive walls of the fortifications the humiez had set up. At last he saw something of use; an odd garbage chute that the populace used to get rid of unwanted waste. His small frame for an ork would mean he could slide right through the thing into the city. It would be grotz' play to get to it, he would just have to take out the occasional guard and would get there before they would even know a disciple of Mork was among them.

After that, Grimsnik could use the special armor that Tiny tinkered for him from a tau stealthsuit to sneak right through the shadows to get to the humie leader Gadnuk had pointed it he wanted taken care of.

Grimsnik smiled as he looked the plan over again, and set out towards the walls that loomed over the ork camp in the distance, but not before grabbing the bombs Blackrog had laid out for Grimsnik's mission . Without a word he broke off from the mass of tents and piles of rubble some rather optimistic meks hoped to use someday, and disappeared from sight, molding into the shadows as if he was a part of them.

Grimsnik crossed through a wide area of tall grasses, mimicking their movements in the wind to not stand out, in the case of a humie hunting party being out and about, not that he couldn't take them of course, but in case they could call for reinforcements. If there was one thing that bothered Grimsnik the most, it would have to be being unable to make a quick, clean kill by stabbing the enemy in the back before sneaking away.

"This is horse-gak. We're stuck out here watching some grass and a pile of dirt while our commanding officers drink all night and rarely check up on the actual war front against these greenskins." Grimsnik heard one man say, with a glob of spit coming after.

"Don't talk so loud. Last man to complain got sent out to a search party in the woods. They found the body mangled and torn apart. Orks didn't care for him being near their home, I guess." Another man said, keeping his voice hushed.

Grimsnik was looking for a way around them, when the opportunity arrived. A soldier came from the shadows and started yelling "you men! Quit your slacking, chief wants you back at base. He's got a new plan to keep the greenskins out." With that the soldiers, glad of the break from watch duty, marched sharply after the officer. Grimsnik, not believing his luck, waited until the were gone, and activated his sneekee suit and made a dash to the pile of garbage that served as the dumpsters. Above them lie a large pipe where civilians from higher levels could drop their unwanted filth to the slums Grimsnik was currently in.

He stood underneath the pipe, and jumped as high as he could, and his fingers just reached the end of the pipe, and he dragged himself up the pipe, wincing as a pile of garbage cascaded down from the chute onto the street beneath him. "Gettin' clumsy" Grimsnik muttered to himself while crawling up the chute.

A loud clanking noise gave Grimsnik the warning of garbage pouring down and he snapped his mouth shut and stared straight below him, letting the filth coat and leave a stench even he, as an ork, was not used to. "Dis is gettin' betta an' betta" he growled, before continuing his climb.

Soon enough he reached the top, and carefully swung the hatch open, letting moonlight pour down onto him. He heard a humie say something, and strained his ears to hear someone making his way to the chute. Grimsnik smiled, and waited patiently for his newfound prey to come closer. Sure enough, the man stuck a fat nose over the edge, and his face contorted with horror as he was face to face with Grimsnik. A large green arm shot upwards and grabbed the man by his throat. Smiling fanatically, Grimsnik crushed his windpipe, stopping him from calling out. Grimsnik then crawled out of the chute. While the man was gasping his last breath, Grimsnik heaved the body up and over the chute, watching the corpse fall down the chute and vanish from sight.

Grimsnik made his through the winding alleys, skirting away from the street lights, knowing his sneekee suit worked best in the dark. If he were to step into light, the suit, while still effective, would not make him as close to as invisible an ork can get while Grimsnik remained in the shadows.

After what felt like ages to Grimsnik, he heard the rumble of a vehicle and immediately a plan came to mind. He scrambled up onto a balcony of a building, and waited for the vehicle to drive past. Soon enough, a chimera rumbled into view, and Grimsnik jumped onto it with a thud.

Grimsnik heard a shout and soon enough a hatch swung open revealing a guardsmen. Grimsnik jumped into action, swing a knife overhead into his skull. The man couldn't even cry out before the blade was through his skull, killing him instantly. The driver turned back to see Grimsnik clamoring down into the vehicle, and the driver drew a laspistol. Grimsnik growled and leapt forwards, pitching himself into the driver and made both slam to the ground. Grimsnik knew the driver stood no chance against him, and plunged his knife into the defeated humie. The man choked on his own blood, before his eyes spaced out and stared at nothing.

Grimsnik set to work piloting the chimera towards his goal that lay in the center of the city, having past experience with such vehicles in his days as a freeboota looting Imperial vehicles and selling them to meks for more teef than he could count. Of course it didn't hurt that the thing had an ingrained navigation system of sorts.

"Those were da dayz", Grimsnik thought aloud, 'if it weren't fer dem rokketz dat killed mah runnin' boyz, I would still be lootin' and not doin' deze sneekee jobz fer Gadnuk". Grimsnik spent a few more moments in silence, remembering the old days of hijacking and and boarding actions, the laugh of old Grotteef, the leader of his pirate crew, or the mischievous look of the crew's Gretchin, Squigklaw.

Grimsnik shook his head, and forced himself to think about the good that came from Gadnuk and his Gutrippas. He had, after all, saved his life from a heist he had botched and had almost been less than a green stain on a wall due to a squad of combat servitors guarding the mechanicus headquarters he had tried to raid. "Stupid machine humiez, I will come back for dem, and only Gork an' Mork can stop me" Grimsnik growled, with more venom in his voice than he intended.

For the rest of the drive Grimsnik sat in silence, pondering what he would do once he actually got to his goal. He planned to use the chimera to infiltrate into the base, with the humiez assuming the chimera didn't have a bit of a break-in.

Soon enough Grimsnik was well withing reach of his goal, and he saw several humiez directing him to where the chimera should drove to. "This is Commisar Samad, if you scratch that paint job I will see you executed, by my own hand, of course." A voice blared out from the vox set.

Grimsnik had the sense to not answer, instead he drove on silently into towards the massive building that stood before him. A road led to a vehicle hangar, which was where the guardsmen where gesturing for him to go.

A large door swung open, and as Grimsnik drove past, it clanged shut behind him. A guardsman hailed to him over the vox "Alright, lad. Step out now, you're cruising time is over for now." Grimsnik wasn't quite sure what his next plan of action would be; if he stepped oit, he would be shot to little bits, but staying in the chimera would get him nowhere. Grimsnik racked his orky brain for a way out of this, and he stood up nervously, making one of Blakrog's bombs fall out of a compartment in his suit. Remembering that he had gotten some from Blackrog before the mission, grimsnik, went to the back of the chimera, and primed the tankbusta bomm, and hid behind a chair, although even his 'small' frame for an ork wasn't completely covered by the piece of furniture.

A loud boom rattled the chimera, and he heard a shout from outside. He could hear someone climbing onto the chimera, presumably to get through the latch, but before he would make it Grimsnik made sure to prime the vehicle with the rest of the splosives he had gotten. Blackrog might not be happy to have all of the bombs wasted, but it was for a good enough cause in Grimsnik's opinion.

The latch started to creak open, and Grimsnik jumped down the hole he had put into the floor of the chimera. Grimsnik crawled out from underneath the chimera, and made a bolt for the only door besides the one he had come through leading out of the large vehicle depot.

With his sneekee suit muffling the sound of his footsteps and making him blend in with the area around him, the guardsmen didn't notice the ork making a beeline for the door to the actual building. Instead, he swung the hatch open, and jumped into the rigged chimera, never getting the time to draw his laspistol, because as soon as he set foot in the vehicle, the chimera became his tomb. A wave of fire and flame washed over him, cooking the entire chimera and making it less than a wreck.

Grimsnik wasted no time in going for the door, and slammed it shut behind him, constantly on the look out for alarms or guards. Unknown to him, some of the grenades Blackrog had given him were looted EMP grenades, and they temporarily fried the alarm and camera systems. As such, Grimsnik's progress through the empty halls were slowed to a crawl, as discovery would lead to a rather quick and messy death that not even his sneekee suit could save him from.

At the very least he had a blueprint of the building thanks to some persistent Gretchin thievery. Instead of memorizing the paper, he had an image of it ingrained to the suit, which made his life a whole lot easier. The leader normally sat in a communications room near the center of the building, which was where Grimsnik intended to be.

Time had no meaning to Grimsnik as he wandered the halls, slowly getting closer to his goal. It could have been a minute ago that he had escaped the chimera, it could have been an hour, Grimsnik had no way of knowing. At long last a humie made himself known, reassuring Grimsnik that the place wasn't forsaken while he had broken in. The man gasped as he turned the corner to see an ork so deep into their main headquarters, let alone the city.

Grimsnik wasn't about to let the man signal an alarm after going so far undiscovered, and shouldered into the man while priming the sneekee suit. The an crushed into the wall behind him, groaning as the air rushed out of his lungs. The soldier drew his combat knife out, knowing he wouldn't be able to get a shot off from his sidearm, but Grimsnik pinned the man's arm down while reaching for his throat with the other. The man made a vain effort to slip his wrist free, but instead Grimsnik pressed harder, and was rewarded with the crunch of the man's wrist snapping.

The knife fell to the ground and Grimsnik reached for it, and stabbed it through the man's flak armor, punching into his heart and ending the soldier's career short. The soldier's head slumped over, and he stopped resisting. Grimsnik stepped away from his kill, looking at the pool of blood that was forming underneath the still warm body.

He knew that he couldn't stay for long; soon others would find the body and raise the alarm. He had to make this quick. He hoped the suit could stay active for a while longer before it needed to recharge once more, as he needed every bit of help he could get. "Maybe if I kill anuvva humie elsewhere, away from da humie boss, dey will fink I am goin' away from da boss." Grimsnik muttered to himself as he went further into the maze of twisting halls and doors.

He checked the map his suit was displaying, and saw he was heading in the right direction. Only a few more turns and he would be at his goal. Of course, due to him being blessed with the usual ork's confidence, he didn't doubt for a second that he wasn't walking into an ambush, but instead his own skill and luck had let him get this far.

As he made his next left he quite literally ran into a squad of guardsmen. The leader in the back of the squad shouted "Die xenos!", before brandishing a chainsword and charging the ork head on. Grimsnik punched one man in the gut, making him topple over, and Grimsnik was certain he wasn't getting up from the blow. He head butted the next man, making his fall to the ground grasping a broken and bloody nose. By this time the leader had gotten to him, and slashed downwards at Grimsnik's head. Knowing he couldn't dodge the blow, he raised a meaty arm to block the hit, and felt the suit hold against the blade before it sank deep into his arm, tearing flesh before getting stuck in his bones. Grimsnik was unused to his own blood being spilt, and the longer this fight carried on the more angry and desperate he got. This was exactly what he did not want, but he had no way of getting out of it.

Grimsnik growled at the man, lifting his arm, and the blade with it, into the air. He sent his own fist into the man's jaw, but the man jumped out of the way. Grimsnik saw another man taking aim with a pistol, and Grimsnik did something that even surprised himself.

He heard a loud cry of WAAAAGH slip past his lips, and he bowled into the soldier, grabbing the gun and beating the man to death with it. He then ripped the blade out of his arm, and felt more blood rush out of the wound. He wielded the chainsword one handed, and smashed it through the man's head, dashing brains all over the place. The leader was taking a bolt pistol out of its holster, but Grimsnik lobbed the chainsword at the man. Though it didn't hit the man, it gave Grimsnik enough time to draw his own knife and finish the job. He made sure the man was particularly unrecognizable after the wound he had done to his arm. The leader uttered one last thing out of his bloody lips "To be brought down by an ork. Emperor, forgive old Samad, won't you?" And with that, all signs of life left him, but Grimsnik had already moved on the rest of the bodies, looking for any loot worth taking. "Nuttin' here. Stupid humiez, if ya'z gunna hurt me arm, you'z betta have sumtin worth takin'" he growled to the pile of bodies, before walking away from the cadavers.

Grimsnik carried on his way, but he was much closer to his destination than ever before. He saw that he had one more turn before he got to the door where the leader was at, and activated the suit once more, gladly noting it still worked in its damaged state. As such, the guards didn't notice him come around the corner, and he got plenty close to them before they noticed anything wrong. He grabbed one with a large hand, smashing his head against a wall, and threw his blade into the chest of the other. This fight lasted less than 2 seconds, and neither guard realized their death had been so close. Grimsnik retrieved his blade, and grabbed a knife from the man. Armed with two weapons now, Grimsnik slowly creaked open the door and slunk inside. Fortunately, the room was poorly lit as to illuminate the holograms the general had on display easier. This raised Grimsnik's spirits considerably as his suit would make him nigh on invisible now.

The room itself was a large circle with a hololith display in the middle, with a layer above it acting as a balcony. The door Grimsnik had come through had led him onto the balcony, and he recognized a mapping of the orky camp being displayed. "Good fing Gadnuk waz gunna leave dem boyz soon. Humiez gunna do sumtin real soon" Grimsnik whispered, while looking around for his prey.

"And you see, the greenskins won't ever expect and assault from above, which is why we do several bombing runs before we launch our Leman Russ Executioners into their camp to wipe it out." A voice called out, and Grimsnik saw a large amount of commanders were standing around the display.

"Why don't we just send in the lads? We have a large enough standing army to wipe them out in one go, if this is as accurate as you say it is?" The last remark was said in an accusatory tone.

"Now, now, Peskov. These orks have some tricks up their sleeves, it cost me my arm when we last tried that." A third voice spoke up, this one old and grim.

Grimsnik looked below at the men, trying to find his target. His suit's display system did the work for him, and he saw the general preparing to speak once more. "My plan will wipe them out, if you would listen. The orks have been preparing an assault of their own, and soon I will have a trick up my own sleeve that will make up for your lost arm, Dehrik." With that he produced a device of sorts and pushed the button on it. Instantly the room was filled with light, and Grimsnik found out his entire suit was inactive. Worse than that, he was immobilized by the EMP pulse wave that had been sent out. He fell over and heard footsteps behind him.

Grimsnik struggled against his suit, and managed drag himself off of the floor. He heard the general gloating below him, "Did you, an ork, think you could just waltz in here and kill us? I'm surprised you made it this far, but we will have talk of this later. Rochov, Mirsk, take our 'guest' to his new home. With that, Grimsnik felt a powerful blow as a shock maul crashed into his skull and was incapitated as electricity surged through his armor and fried his skin. As soon as the blow landed Grimsnik's vision faded him and blackness greeted him.

Grimsnik awoke to find himself chained down and every movement sent a jolt of lightning through his body. The room he was in barely had any light to it, and he groaned as pain swept through him. "Stinkin' humiez. Dey shoulda just killed me. I'll kill him good and proper fer dis" Grimsnik growled, and spat onto the floor, only to be rewarded with another pulse of electricity. He was also dismayed to see he wasn't wearing his sneekee suit anymore. Anger swept through him, and he gnashed his teef together at his frustration at being a caged animal.

A door swung open and Grimsnik was blinded by the sudden light. He saw his room was made out of a dark stone, and was completely bare, except a pile of armor on the ground Grimsnik assumed was his sneekee suit. Grimsnik recognized the General as he walked into the room, with several guards standing behind him.

"Well, ork, it isn't common for this prison to see a xenos prisoner. In fact, you are the first, and possibly last. I doubt any other xenos but yourself would be worth capturing, instead it would be much more worthwhile and simpler to kill them. I just had some questions to ask you, assuming you can understand any of this Low Gothic, you brute".

Grimsnik growled, before answering "I can undahstand ya, stinkin' humie git. Me boyz will come and smash dis place good and proper."

"Good, you can speak. Now, how did you even get this close before getting caught in our security? What, did you think your little explosion in the depot would go unnoticed? The place was fried for a little while, but once it was back online we were following you like a bloodhound."

Grimsnik was already tired of the conversation, but added "Ize not tellin' you a Gorkin' fing. Might as well kill me now, ya git. I shoulda known you waz an in proper squig runt from da start. Dunno why Gadnuk wanted you dead so bad."

"Oh? You have an employer, then? I'm curious how much my head is worth to you, but that's not why I spared your life for a few more hours. How did you manage to get here infiltrated? How did your suit come to be, and how does it work, I wonder?" The General implored, while gesturing to where the suit lay.

"Not gun' get nuffin' outta me, humie." Grimsnik repeated. The General just shook his head and snapped his fingers. At once, a man came into the room carrying a white hot brand. Without a second glance he stabbed it into Grimsnik's already wounded arm, making Grimsnik suck in his breath, though he had felt worse in his life.

Grimsnik let himself crack a toothy smile, and let out a belch of laughter. "Stupid humie, dats all ya got? Give me da poky stick, I'll show ya how ta do it." This seemed to anger the General, and he gestured to Grimsnik's tusks. "I am aware an ork's teef, as you call them, cam be considered a sign of wealth and power. Not just that, they are a currency. I think I would like to have yours, if you don't mind." As he said it the man swung his brand onto one of Grimsnik's tusks, cracking it off while the General looked on with malicious glee.

"Bah, dat 'ill grow ba' soon, stinkin git" Grimsnik spat out while blood stuck to his gums. The torture and taunts continued for several more hours until the General grew tired of it, and left the room, saying "I will come back, and will crack you, greenskin." As the General and his retinue left the room the door slammed shut, and Grimsnik was once more surrounded in darkness. He was left like that for several more hours as his wounds healed and blood pooled around his feet. Then, Grimsnik heard a voice, but it was no humie voice. "Grimsnik, are ya dere, answer me, ya git"

Grimsnik realized the voice was coming from his sneekee suit. "Gadnuk? I'm stuck in a humie prison. Ize got too big fer me own good, boss. Da humie is still alive, but I don't see how I can kill da git." Grimsnik half growled, half whimpered in the presence of his boss.

"Hold on, ya runt. We'ze will come and show ya how some real killin' is done, not gettin' caught by stinkin' humiez."

"Yes, boss. Fanks boss, dey took some of me teef. It ain't right, dey didn't even take 'em in a brawl, dey just smashed 'em" Grimsnik complained.

"Getta hold on yerself boy. Weze comin' now ta fix da place up." Gadnuk said.

"One more fing boss, howz you comin' ta get here? Da WAAAAGH wazn't ready ta charge yet. Dis place is locked up real good."

"Don't worry about it. Weze comin' fast, and weze comin' in style. Blackrog! Dats enuff bombs! Weze goin'!"

A flash lit up a hallway outside of Grimsnik's room and the sheer brightness of it left him blinded for a few seconds. He heard several whoops and the sound of footsteps trailing away, and the voice of Gadnuk, "Grimsnik? Wherez ya at?"

"Over here, boss. In da cell." While Grimsnik was blinking away the last few black spots in his eyes, Blakrog blew the door off of its hinges, and the Gutrippas poured into the room.

"Don't just stand there gawking ya gitz. Get me loose." Grimsnik growled.

The kommandoz wasted no time in cutting the chains, and only received minor electric shocks. Grimsnik was quick to grab his suit and put it on, not wanting to lose the thing again. Before they left, Blackrog handed Grimsnik two blades to make up for the weapons he had lost. As they walked out of the room Grimsnik saw several pools of what looked like bubbling flesh, and the entire corridor reeked. A lone weirdboy stood outside the door, laughing maniacally ad the power of the WAAAAGH washed over him, giving him power.

"Weze brought some extra boyz dat were wantin' a good fight. Some of dem didn't come out right. Stinkin' gitz." Blackrog explained, before the group started to make their way away from the torture cell, and heard gunfire up ahead.

The shouts of "WAAAAGH" were getting less and less, while cries of "For the Emperor!" and "For Terra" were waxing. Soon enough, a fully armed squad of guardsmen turned the corner, each one of the men coated in an ork's blood. Grimsnik made out the General in the group, wielding lightning claws and leading the charge at the ork kommandoz.

Grimsnik barked out "He's mine. I came dis far ta git 'im, and I iz not about ta let da runt git away". With that, Grimsnik charged headlong into the General, giving a war cry that drowned out whatever the General was saying.

Grimsnik was the first to swing, sending an overhead blow aimed to decapitate the General, but he ducked under the blow and jabbed a set of claws into Grimsnik's gut. The ork jumped backwards, and sent a kick aimed at his thigh. The General tried to jump out of the way, but was too slow, and heard a sharp crack as his leg broke. Still the General fought on, slashing away like a madman to keep the ork at bay. Grimsnik activated his suit, letting himself merge with his surroundings to confuse the General as he weaved as much as an ork can around him.

The General made another jab at Grimsnik, but the swing had missed and Grimsnik sent a return blow, cutting the arm off. The General had paid a price, but confirmed where Grimsnik was, and slashed with his other claw, cutting through the suit and cutting out part of its circuitry. The suit failed to work anymore, and the General smiled at his foe. "You fight well, ork. It wod be a shame to never know your name before you pass." Grimsnik ignored the taunt and made another charge at the General. The man stuck his claws out which embedded into Grimsnik, but the ork didn't care as he managed to stick his own blade through the General's chest, making blood spill out the back.

Grimsnik let the General fall, leaving his blade embedded in the flesh of his chest. "Da name'z Grimsnik. Ya git. An' I told ya I would show ya how ta fight good an' proper like". Grimsnik smiled a feral grin, showing the stumps of where his tusks once were, before the man in front of him had taken them away. "I'll show you what it's like ta have no teef. No, I'll just take da whole head." With that, Grimsnik swung down with his other blade, slicing the head off while the General and his men looked on with horror. Grimsnik grabbed the head, staring into its lifeless eyes, before he stumbled over, the wounds finally taking an effect. The guardsmen were quick to want revenge, and prepared a charge to finish off Grimsnik, but not before Blackrog sent a grenade tumbling into the squad, blowing them to shreds.

Before darkness took Grimsnik, he saw the other kommandoz rushing forwards to finish off the squad, and Tiny grabbing the lightning claws from the slain General. Gadnuk threw Grimsnik over his shoulders, and carried him with them as he led the group out of the war zone.

"Don't worry, we'ze gettin' outta dis here WAAAAGH and goin' ta wun dats more fittin' to us here kommandoz." Gadnuk said, and nodded to the weirdboy who was going to tellyport the entire squad out once more.

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Ok this is quite possibly the best fan fiction I've ever read simply spectacular. I'm not going to lie at first I thought damn that's long, but I was literally at the edge of my seat I was genuinely worried for Grimsnik when he got caught. Spectacular A+
Made in us
Master Shaper

Gargant Hunting

Sweet, I was hoping you would like it. I didn't mean for it to be so long, I was sort of on and off with writing it, so it was just little bits being added together.

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Howdy folks I am beyond happy with the stories you have all created, I think together we have created a plethora of exemplar examples of Ork character development and with my groups game of black crusade restarting, I'd hope to finish the squad 2 more boys needed, I will also be writing up the story for the other Important characters I've recruited to my Ork mercenary force.
But before I get off topic I wanted to again look at who we got
Gadnuk da Nob
Squiggit da Sneeky Squig Squeeza
Blakrog da Boom maker
Old SkagNet da Saboteur
Tiny GitFingaz da tinkerer
Bigrippa da eavy weapons boy
Blagnabba da driver/dismantleer
Bonebleeda da SargeGit
Grimsnikk da assassin
I would like at least 2 more Kommandos but by no means interpret this as a limit as I've said before having more orks on deck is only a good thing. Please feel free to write your own character I mostly just need 2 more bodies for the mob. However if you'd like a general character direction I could use someone to pilot a warkopta.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/06/28 19:57:39

Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

Inspired by the amazing story of Grimsnik I bring you ...

Sleekit aka The Grotfather


Sleekit is a sly little gretchin who Gadnuk keeps around, or rather associates with due to his rather unique skill set.   

Sleekit is unusually bold for a gretchin but typically canny and never reckless. He has a keen mind for logistics and makes a killing (often litterally) on selling information, stollen goods and supplies and other clandestine services to orks like Gadnuk who occasionally employ the sneaky little blighter to further their own pernicious schemes.

Sleekit wares tall heavy boots and a long heavy coat inside both of which he stashes supplies for sale, and other items he has stolen often on commission. His trademark human commissar's hat bares an unashamed Rebel Grot red star and with the number of blackmail options at his fingertips concerning any and all of his local ork bosses he can afford to keep it that way.   

Sleekit has an uncanny ability to exceed expectation. Ask him to steal some gear to arm your mob and he'll provide the finest swag money can't buy. Ask him for a way into an enemy stronghold and he'll find you blueprints, guard rotations, coffee machine delivery man uniforms, and more if he thinks it's worth his while. 

Sleekit sees every job for what it's worth; what it's worth to the client, to the client's rivals, how much he can get out of it and most of all what his own skin is worth. Sleekit's considerable initiative can mean the difference between and badly botched job and a smooth operation. Any ork boss not too proud to consult a gretchin (which discounts most) knows that although Sleekits services are expensive (even more so if you don't pay up) the initial cost is more often than not a wise investment.  

Gadnuk puts a lot of stock in Sleekits information and logistical know-wots. He can always find ammo reloads for Rippa, oilly squigs for Squeeza, wires and timers and junk for Blackrog, and fresh insults to hurl at SkagNet. On top of all that Sleekit is also the best source of info on who or what is going down and he helps keep Gadnuk and the Gutrippas one step ahead of the game. 

Sleekit started out his illustrious career as a pickpocket and old habbits die hard. He's never lost the knack and practices as often as he can even off the odd unsuspecting GutRippa. When Sleekit is about BoneBleeda watches him like a hawk and has been known to clobber Sleekit senseless on some of his rustier attempts at petty larceny.


BoneBleeda eyed the grot across the table with mennace. He wanted Sleekit to know that he was watching his every move. The ork patted his pockets, absent mindedly checking where his teef were at.

"it's in yer back pocket." Sleekit mumbled making a point of not looking up from the clearly unimportant task that was occupying his attention. 
"Gadnuk runnin late is he?"

"shut up ya jumped up Grot! He's comin'". BoneBleeda growled. "an' you best watchit! He's not 'appy."

Sleekit kicked back in his chair and deposited his booted heels on the table. Reaching back over his shoulder he hooked his hat off the wall and placed it squarely on his head, rebel star front and centre. "best look me best fer da Boss then."

BoneBleeda glowered and the pair waited in silence and stared at eachother, hard.

Gadnuk threw the door wide and stomped inside. BoneBleeda stepped back to give his Nob some room and Sleekit, despite himself removed his feet from the table and sat up straight. Gadnuk tossed a hefty bag of teef onto the table.

"Dats yer lot." he grunted.

Sleekit, quick as an oiled squiglet dropped his hat over the bag.
"looks to me, Gadnuk..." he proceeded with slow deliberation "there's about forty teef under my hat."

"I've no time fer yer games, one'ov me lads 'as been fixed up good an proppa an' no fanx ta you. I've rounded up da back-up lads an' we're goin' in after 'im! I thought I tol' you we was goin' on wif da back-up plan!"   

"Hang about, Gadnuk!" Sleekit protested "don't blame me. You always knew it were a risky enterprise. Did he find the garbage chute I told you about?"

"Up it an all first fing dis evening" Gadnuk was not impressed.
"He's got the guard pattern?" Sleekit reminded him.
"He's not too bovvered 'bout dat sorta fing. Grimsnik takes his own chances."
"Suit yerself." Sleekit decided to go for the big guns " The sneaky suit!" Sleekit was eager to highlight and catalogue all his contributions one at a time  "What did tiny make of the suit?"

"Tiny bodged it up ta fit Grimsnik goodanproppa."

"I'll bet he had ta be da sneakinist fing in da ooniverse in dat sneaky suit" Sleekit enthused.
Gadnuk didn't look impressed. "Dey caught 'im." he grumbled.

"I notice you're 'oldin da blueprints. Sleekit continued "Dey were a doozy ta get me 'ands on. Maybe Grimsnik should've 'ad them wif 'im."
"Tiny wired him up to ave a copy in his suit."

"Good Finkin'!"

"Course it's good finkin' it's my plan yer grot git!" Gadnuk slamed the blue prints tube down hard on the table. 
"It's just gone a bit squiff Is all. I brought da maps so's da weirdboy can 'ave a butchers at 'em. But..." he paused nodding at Sleekit's hat on the table between them "as da teef not under yer hat can tell ya..." Gadnuk leaned in and locked eyes with his gretchin conspirator. "I don't see no weirdboy." 

"C'mon Gadnuk, 'ave a little faith. Grimsnik is da best der is, he'll get hisself out ov dis. And wif da help ov da Grotfather it's a sure fing. And anyway, ya know... a wierdboy's a tricky customer to..."

Gadnuk had his hands round the gretchin's throat before he could blink. 

"I swear ta Gork" Gadnuk growled under his fetid breath, low and grim and deadly serious "if Grimsnik goes down cause'ov you I'll kill you and ev'ry other grot I see fer as long as I live. Dey'll call us da GrotRippas."

"Grimsnik was a fool!" Sleekit gasped "he drove a tank right in the front door and blew it up! Of course he was spotted, of course they gottim!" Sleekit used Gadnuk's momentary confusion to slip out of his grasp.

"Wot? Ow'd ya know dat?"

"I has eyes in da city." Sleekit boasted, catching his breath. "Stinka, he's a sewer grot, said he saw a tank go in and a lot of smoke come out. It's hardly the sneakingest way to get into the general's HQ if ya ask me."

"Well I'm done askin' ya." Gadnuk barked "Now I'm tellin ya. I gots da ladz, but I needs a jumpa ta get uz in der and back out again! Not just any ol' 'ead bangin' weirdboy, a proppa warp'ead."
"you know, dat human general has a pretty nice set of claws" Sleekit mused pointedly.
Gadnuk knew what Sleekit was after. A pair of lightning claws with the right buyer could fetch a tidy sum. More than doubling Sleekit's already considerable fees. But what did Gadnuk care for a human's stolen toys. The Gutrippas had been listening in on the general's private sessions with Grimsnik via the sneaky suit's com-link and they wanted the man's blood more than his weapons. All Gadnuk needed was the chance to take both.

"You'll 'ave 'em." Gadnuk spat in his palm and offered it to the grot. Sleekit grinned and shook hands, sealing the deal. BoneBleeda spat on the floor disgusted at Sleekit's outrageous extortion.
"He's a Bad-Moon, this wierdboy." Sleekit explained. "not some fungus addled Snakebite." 

Gadnuk knew where this was going.

"Bad-Moons ain't cheap." the grot added.
Gadnuk turned to leave. He nodded to BoneBleeda "Pay 'im."

BoneBleeda took the bag of teef from his back pocket and lobbed them at the grot as hard as he could. Sleekit ducked narrowly escaping injury as the bag scattered teef clattering over the floor. 
"We''ll be leaving at sundown." Gadnuk called and then they were gone. 

Sleekit waited until the ork voices had receded from his door before dropping to his knees and frantically gathering up the scattered teef. Afterall, he had a Bad-Moon wierdboy to pay.  

sorry he's not the warkopter pilot you asked for.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2022/08/16 12:31:21

Made in us
Master Shaper

Gargant Hunting

I appreciated this immensely. I didn't expect someone to write a secondary bit to Grimsnik's story, but I'm sure glad it happened. Sleekit is a really cool character as well, and a jump back to your grotz again, which I'm sure no one will complain about.

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

A great behind the scenes story, if you don't mind I think I will take him with us when we get off Armageddon.
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

ok so I wanted to write a story that included all the characters we already have, Sleekit will be in the next installment.
Da Pirates life for us.
Our story begins shortly after the recruitment of the that git SkagNet
The gutrippas were eagerly swaggering their way down the dirt packed streets of the ork shanty towns that surrounded the crumbling space port. Most of the boyz had lightened up after having been taken for fools by SkagNet, all but BoneBleeda who still seemed bitter about the ordeal. The mob of fifteen who carried large olive drab duffle bags they borrowed from the omies had seemingly no qualms about leaving Armageddon the planet which was the only thing they knew. The band of cloaked and camouflaged drew much of the local Deff Skull attention they were probably better equipped than the better half of the town. They continued to make their way through the dirty streets and eventually reached the makeshift looted space port. The structure was a massive dome with honeycomb cells that held smaller space vessels. Larger Ork Krozas would send landers up and down to the space port while some smaller ones could land and dock with the port. The space port was jam-packed apparently some Evil-Suns Warboss wanted in on Armageddon and decided to bring all of his vehicles through. Lunatic Ork boyz were everywhere with no real common purpose other than to free their own set of wheels and ride off to find a fight. The posse proceeded down the hall when BoneBleeda began to speak “leave it to zoggin Bad Moons to turn getting ere into a zoggin racket” GitFingaz replied “Ain’t no different from what we do” Blackrog spat “we don’t rip gitz off, I mean chargein just ta land das wrong.” Blagnabba “what about dat time we tricked dem Snake Bites by tellin dem those sticks we sold em were blessed by Gork imself.” Bigrippa decided to answer this question, “das different they were a bunch of lice ridden gitz dat had it coming, dey zogged up and got Bitrunt urt”. Nabba laughed at what he felt to be a completely accurate summation of what snakebites are “I ain’t complaining can’t stand the butt biters myself.” As usual Bleeda had to join in on the conversation to refocus the boyz on the topic “da difference is we only rip gitz off who deserve it, and most of da time da work we do is fair, well not fair for da git we gotta kill, but fair in we get paid to actually do fings deez Badmoon egg chewaz don’t do squig piss other than let boyz land der Kroozas, bet da gitz got fat sacks of teef for dis too, disgraceful it is”. Gadnuk was about to say something as they began to turn a corridor when a war buggy came zooming through the hall the gunner and the pilot screaming something about psycho cycles. Gadnuk shook his head “Zoggin Evil-Sun spazez”

Finnaly they were in the right place the massive terminal was nowhere near as crowded as the rest of the port. Virtually every Ork in the room with the exception of Gadnuk’s boyz were dressed in pirate garb. Gadnuk scanned the room and saw plenty of motly orks playing games, drinking, and fighting but the one who Gadnuk was looking for was a ork with blue stripped trousers and shiny well oiled black boots, he was leaning against a wall so that only one leg touched the floor while the other was supported by the wall. He hadn’t notice Gadnuk enter the room as he was busy with his clip board. When he looked up he approached the group Gadnuk spoke “you Krem?” the near toothless ork smiled “aye and you must be Gadnuk, and I assume deez are the Gutrippas” the ork freebooter looked over the squad and seemed impressed he then spoke again “well you the first Kommando mob we hired to show up” Grimsnikk moved from the rear of the group to the front “I thought we was going to the only Kommandos on dis kan” the ork shook his head “Nah Boss Grinnbad says aving some sneaky gitz on board could be good” Gadnuk began rubbing his temples Skagnet yelled from the rear of the mob “who eles ya got coming” the freebooter nob began searching his clip board “ let see derez, Bekruz and da Blitza Sneekas” Squiggit interrupted “amateurs” the ork continued “den derez Spitburn and da Grindaz” Gitfingaz spoke “Spitburn smells weird” ignoring that the ork continued “Next derez GoreSlack and da Huntaz” “mediocre” shouted Bonebleda. The ork finished up “lastly deres Grunt wif da Black Skull Kommandos” the orks all seemed shocked Bigrippa’s cigar fell out of his mouth. Gadnuk sighed “well Zog”

Krem was nice enough to give the Gutrippas a cask of Fungus Rum. As Krem hauled the massive wooden cask usually reserved for a mob of nobz not Kommandos he began to speak. “sorry about the whole Black Skull thing hope dis makes up fer it” Gadnuk said “it don’t but thanks”. The pirate nob stretched his long muscular arms and asked “whats yer beef wif dis Grunt fella anyhow.” Bigrippa moved to the cask and opened the valve, he looked to Gadnuk and asked “can I boss” Gadnuk sighed “Fine but fill up my tankard first, not lissenin to dis story sober.” Gadnuk tossed the cup and Rippa caught it and swapped his horn’s potion for the metal tankard without spilling a drop. Rippa finished filling the mug and made way for Skagnet who instead of a cup only put his mouth to the faucet. As a brawl broke out over who would go next Bonebleeda moved in to break it up and to make sure no more booze was spilt on the floor. Krem, Gadnuk, and Rippa moved to a bench and table. Rippa began after gulp of rum “It all began dat day we took out Dat omie stompa”

Ya see When Gadnuk off dat git Bonechewa, he wasn’t expecting Grunt to get so angry. It turns out dat da two were mates so in a matter of seconds there was a full on brawl between us and black skulls. As soon as Bonebleeda and Gadnuk shook hands here comes Grunt frothing out da mouth yellin “Ya Git, ya no good Blood axe Git, I’ll Stomp you!” he tackled Gadnuk but Gadnuk was mighty kunning as soon as he fell to his back he kicked him off so dat he fell over his head. I swear as soon as Gadnuk knocked him down he must of got bigger just den he let out a mighty WAAAGH! And all his boyz came running in.we all traded blows and everyone walked away wif a few less teef, personally I think the Goffs walked off with a few less, soon da remainder of the Bonebrekas joined in to help da black skulls and da other Blood axe boyz came to give us a hand not like we needed it. Soon enough Grotsnik and boss Bonnieparts showed up with the Tank bustas. Da boss bellowed “Enough” and all us proper blood axes stopped and da Goffs stopped out of confusion except for Grunt who took a cheap shot at Gadnuk. Da dok began to speak in dat creepy voice he has “I don’t really know what in da name of Gork is going on here and I don’t give half a squigs arse. But I do know how I want to settle it, a good ol joust” Grunt seemed happy at the idea he had never lost a joust before and now he would get to fight Gadnuk one on one. Which is lucky cus I would ave krumped him wif one hand behind my- ouch Gadnuk hit Bigrippa. “tell da truth da git was tough” ok maybe not. Before da duel started when we was armoring Gadnuk up and readyin his wheela da dok came in to see him. He said dat he’s seen da git joust before and dat he never wears a zogging helmet and dat he kept his shield low. For da tip Gadnuk said thanks and da dok wished him luck and went off to his balcony to watch the duel attaching the head to his belt. Gitfingaz had made a mod to Gadnuk’s lance he found a zappy bit from some where and over charged it wif a las cannon battery, it was one use only but it hurt like mork’s piss all he had to do was press da button and zap. So da two nobs moved to dere positions and when da horns blew dey reved dere wheelas and had at it. Just like da dok had said no helmet low shield. It was perfect Gadnuk aimed his lance and pulled da trigger. Da zap knocked him off of his bike. Gadnuk hopped off his ride and pulled a pair of axes to remind the audience of blood axe glory. But to Gadnuk’s surprise Grunt got up, his face was burned where da zappa hit him I mean the left half of his face was burned right good. He pulled a big choppa. Da two were going back and fourth Gadnuk was fast but grunt was war boss strong. Den it happened Grunt lifted da choppa over his head when Gadnuk rolled out of the way landing behind him he stuck an axe in each of the unarmored joints behind his knees. Gadnuk pulled a knife from his boot and moved to face the kneeling ork. Gadnuk toyed with the knife in his hand when grunt said “do it” when Gadnuk said one of da greatest things I’ve ever heard he said “Nah you aint worth the a Snotling’s droppings, you don’t deserve to be stomped by an ork like me, you’d make a good trophy for a some sickly omie somewhere” he started to walk away when dat Git spoke “zogging blood axes can’t ever finish what you start.” Gadnuk turned around and kicked him square in da gob knocking him to his back. Then he walked over him and took out his eye wif da knife. He then walked away and without lookin back he said “I finished” he then walked out of da arena and we all got squig faced. Krem looked confused “I don’t see what da big zogging problem is”. Gadnuk finished off his drink, “ I didn’t spare him cus he wasn’t worthy I spared him to sell him to da dok, he pays big to experiment on orks like dat.” Krem began again “ I still don’t see what the big deal…” just then a massive ork nob walked in. It was Grunt he was a foot taller from when the two dueled. His left arm was gone and had been replaced with a completely metal arm with a built in power claw with a flame thrower in its palm. His eye from where he was burned had been replaced with a git finder. His jaw now had a full metallic black gob for sheer intimidation factor. He looked over at the table where the trio was sitting and he smiled at Gadnuk then he ran his thumb across his throat in a slitting motion and walked off to another corner of the terminal followed by his well armored boyz without making a noise. The Gutrippas stopped fighting over the cask and looked at Gadnuk, except for Skagnet who continued to drink from the nozzle. Gadnuk took a deep breath and said the only thing he could “Well Zog”

To be continued

This message was edited 3 times. Last update was at 2016/08/20 07:39:52

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Still looking for 2 more ork boyz, or if you just want to submit a story regarding these characters feel free to do that also.
Made in us
Master Shaper

Gargant Hunting

I'll see what I can do. In fact, I've got an idea in mind I'm rather fond of...

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

I'm happy to keep contributing. I just don't want to hog the thread. Got a name for your warkopter pilot but no story has formed in my mind yet. I'm not claiming the guy just registering my commitment to filling your roster in the absence of any more stonking great original characters from the rest of the stonking great original writers on here.

Ork fiction is my bread and butter so I'll keep thinking. I love doing these guys.

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Sounds great
Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

over the last week or so 2BlackJack1 and I have been collaborating on some new characters for the Gutrippas.
We've got a flamer guy and a Warkopter Pilot. 2BlackJack1 is working on our pilot and I've been writing up our flamer ork.

So without further preamble we present...

Kronik BurnZerker

Kronik BurnZerker

Dok Grotsnik's bone saw ground to a halt and he sniffed.

"is sumfink burnin?" He looked up and noticed his front door was open.
"Morka'mighty, Dok" it was Skab, one of his grot orderlies and Skitter, another grot who sometimes collected spare parts for the Dok; arms and legs and heads that their previous owners no longer required. They were dragging in something large and heavy and black as a cinder.  
"da whole planet's burnin', I fink."

Grotsnik, looked askance; he wasn't convinced.
"Da Oomies rolled out a whole lotta burna wagons" Skab continued "I reckon dey pretty much torched da whole Waaagh!"

Grotsnik eyed them both incredulously. Everyone knew grots were prone to more than a bit of hyperbole. It was brobbably just a squad of men with flamethrowers, maybe led by a bald man with a fat cigar. He felt sure that one of these pair was due a lobotomy.

"F-fer real Boss, I mean, D-Dok!" Skitter chimed in, "N-not even Gh-Ghazghkull's Skarboyz could stand up to dem!" 

Grotsnik's face dropped. Ghazghkull's Skarboys were considered some of the toughest, hardest and deadliest veterains around. Hand picked by the warlord himself. Few orks, never mind gretchin would dare say such a thing unless it were true. He had to see this for himself. 

Stepping over the burnt thing the grots had dumped in the hall, only now registering it as a body, he rushed outside. All along the span of the horizon the sky was aglow in a dull orange flickering haze as distant fires pumped smoke into the reek of the night sky: not good honest dirty squig-oil smoke, the air had the sickly clean tang of Imperial Promethium. 
"Oly Zoggin Gork..." Grotsnik's bone saw clattered to the ground unheeded.

The ork painboy backed up, eyes wide and stepping inside his surgery in a daze promptly tripped over the blackened body in his hallway. The grots sniggered in their sleeves.

"What the Zork!" Grotsnik exploded, collecting his wits from the floor. "You useless spawns of gretchin..." he threw a heavy surgical blade at the scarpering grots, and a tongue clamp and a pen-torch. Eventually he had only insults left to hurl at the pair.

"What in Gork's name am I gonna do wif dis useless hunk of barbequed grox meat?"

The grots emerged tentativly from hiding to give an account of themselves as the Dok's verbal tirade continued.

"That's a chargrilled ork you pair'ov goodfernuffink zoggin snot munchers! His brain is probly half baked! He's burnt to a cinder! He's blacker'n a Goff's boot! He's a..."

"H-he's alive!" interjected the braver grot flinchingly.

"He's wot?"

They all stopped and stared at the still smoking body of the ork lying supine on the surgery floor. Sure enough it was breathing.

"Well I'll be a Grox's rear..." mummbled Grotsnik, his embarisment forgotten.

"W-we foun' 'im wandering around after d-da scorcha wagons went 'ome." the grot offered. "He was just p-ploddin' about all b-burnt an' black."

"He's well dim, Dok." added Skab, "He doesn't even know he's butt naked! An' he'll do anyfink you tells 'im. Thick as Squig turd he is and twice as stupid."

Grotsnik blinked.

"F-funniest f-fing I eva saw!" Skitter put in, "He j-just followed us 'ere wiffout a question, he on'y collapsed outside da w-wagon-worx an' den we d-dragged I'm da rest ov da way. F-fought you'd like to give I'm a check-up."

"a Check-up! He needs a zoggin' Ork transplant!" Grotsnik joked. "Who izzee?" 

It took the grots a moment to realise the question was neither rhetorical nor trivial. Who was this guy? They looked at eachother and shuffled their feet nervously. 

"Well? Is he one'v da Skarboys?" 

"He's tough enough."

"And p-p-plenty skarred enough."

"Does he talk? Does he know iz own name?"

"I d-don't fink so B-boss, I mean Dok!" Skitter backpeddaled "He d-don't know nuffink."

"That makes three of ya den!" Grotsnik moved to his opperation trolley and lifted his syringe. "I fink it's about time we wake 'im up."  

Grotsnik administered the meds while Skab tied on his apron obviously expecting surgery was the most likely course of action. Skitter found a couple of spare boots and some trousers and attempted to administer some dignity as their anonymous charge revived. 

Grotsnik waved a hand infront of the patient's eyes, clicked his fingers in the ork's ears, punched him on the arm and then again on the other one just to be sure. Nothing.

"I tells ya he's..."

"Shuddup Skab ya gobby grot git! I'm da Dok around here! I do da examinations. I'll do da tells-yas!" Grotsnik glared them both into silence and continued his fruitless tests. 

"Oi! Me name's Dok Grotsnik. Yer in da surgery! I iz gonna fix ya up, see!" Nothing.

Most orks even the hardest of the hard would have balked at the prospect of one of Grotsnik's famed opperations. There was no chance the ork hadn't heard of him. He had opperated on the Warlord personally. Grotsnik was infamous. The painboy was miffed and frustrated. He doubled down. 

"Hop up on me bench der matey I wants ta have a lookit yer brain." 

They all stood agape as the charred body resurected and plodded over to the bench. His roasted rear deposited securely in place he proceeded to present his burnt bonce for the anticipated surgery. 

"Wait, wait wait!" Grotsnik complained. "Hang about... er" he paused, "wot's yer name?"   

The ork, although hideously disfigured was still capable of a dumb expression. 

"Aint you worried?" prompted Grotsnik "I'm about to saw yer 'ead open!"

"Itz useless B-Boss, I mean Dok. His b-b-brain is so cooked he's not even scared."

"Ha! I'll teach 'im ta fear ol' Dok Grotsnik! Where's me bone saw?" Grotsnik fumbled through discarded tools and body parts on his trolley looking for the saw. The cranial-clamp mocked him, useless in the face of such infuriating complicity. The skull stapler waited it's turn, but with the patient's skull remaining stubournly unsevered the wait was extending beyond Grotsnik's capacity to bare. He toppled the trolley in a rage.

"Skab!" he yelled at the flustered orderly "Where's me bone-saw!" The blackened ork sat benign and unpreturbed. "I gots ta chop dis fella's bap right the Zog now!"

Just then another waft of promethium smoke accompanied an unexpected visitor, intruding on Grotsnik's privacy at this most critical of moments. More distractions, more obstacles in the way of this desperatly important surgery. 

"You lookin' dis 'ere urty fing Dok?" it was Gadnuk with the Painboy's bone-saw in hand. "Fink yer must've dropped it outside der. Huh? Who's dis guy?"

Grotsnik's initial anger was tempered by the welcome appearance of his bone-saw. The arrival of Gadnuk too was always welcome. He never came to Grotsnik's surgery empty-handed. 

"Ah Gadnuk me ol' lad. Dis 'ere is my latest victi...er I mean patient. He's 'ere fer a lobotomy." Grotsnik's fingers twitched eagerly as he eyed the saw in Gadnuk's hand.

"Shouldn't he be strapped down first?"

"Nah! He's gotta Kronic case ov... BurntBonce feeva." The dok contrived trying to sound knowledgable. "His brain is half-baked! He followed me grots here and sat down on me table his-self, easy as squig-pie. He ain't scared of nuffink."

Gadnuk was holding the door open for another ork carrying a bag of what Grotsnik could only assume were fresh heads. 

"BoneBleeda? I thought you were part of BoneChewa's crew" said the Painboy mentally callibrating his patient's skintone against the former Goff's boots. Morkalmighty! Those boots were black. 

Bleeda didn't say anything, he just tossed the sack of heads at Grotsnik's feet by way of explanation. The open end released a big Nob's head, none other than BoneChewa himself.

"He works fer me now." said Gadnuk in answer to the question forming on Grotsnik's face.

BoneBleeda stuffed a fat fungus-leaf rollie in his chops and sparked it up. Before he could extinguish his small squig-oil burna the ork on the opperating table went berserk.

Leaping into a frenzy the ork lunged at BoneBleeda trying to wrest the lighter from his grasp. The little torch hung aloft in Bleeda's hand as he struggled to keep it high out of his adversary's reach. 

"Well I'll be Zogged." gasped Grotsnik. "He's a zoggin' BurnaBerserker!" 

"Wot's a Burn-Zer-ker?" Skab misquoted joining the chat as the wrestling orks hit the floor.

"I neva seen one before today, fire mad dey are."

"Yeah, Dok! He went nutz when Bleeda lit up! It's da fire, didja see dat?"

"Shuddup Skab, Orks is talkin'!" 

Skab folded his arms and settled in to enjoy the sport.

"I've heard of dis sort ov fing before in da Charadon orks." Grotsnik continued informatively. "Da Arch-Arsonist an his ladz." 

Gadnuk nodded, though he had never heard of any Arch-Arsonist. His curiosity was piqued. Charadon. Another planet out there he had to reach out to. Again he felt the inexorable pull to leave Armageddon. The wild unknown universe beckoned.  

BoneBleeda had lost the upper hand early on due to the element of surprise in the stranger's sudden, unprovoked and totally unexpected attack but now the tide was turning. Bleeda used the flame to distract his adversary long enough to pin his arms in a great bear hug. He stuck his head in, twice, but the berserker hardly flinched. Finally he tossed the lighter across the room just to be loosed from the fight. He pulled a wickedly heavy knuckle-duster from his pocket and dressed his fist for round two. The stranger chased the little flame like a maniac but before he could reach it Skitter lifted the little burner and flicked the lid back over extiguishing the flame. The ork stopped as if poleaxed and dropped in a heap on the floor. Skitter tossed the burna to Bleeda who snatched it from the air with contempt. He left the knucks on, his fingers still flexing, denied a face to punch. 

"Alright grots," Grotsnik announced, "show's ova. Lets get 'im up on da bench an' get 'is 'ead open!" The Painboy was posatively itching to have at him with a bone-saw. "Giv'us dat 'ere Gadnuk." his face was bright with anticipation. 

"Hold up Dok." Gadnuk's words were sandpaper and vinegar to Grotsnik's nerves. The Bone-saw withheld like water and air.
"Yer tellin' me dat dis 'ere fella will follow anyone, Is scared of nuffink, is burnt black'r'n Squeeza's fingernails from head ta foot, and goes berserk if he sees fire?!" 

"Yes yes! He's a Kronik BurnaBerserker! Now giv'us dat saw!"

"I tells ya wot, Grotsnik. Der's six perfec'ly orky brains in dat der sac, ol' BoneChewa's included. You can 'avem fer free. But I'm takin' ol' Kronik BurnZerker 'ere wif me." he held the saw to ransom as Grotsnik twisted in anguish. "wot'll it be Dok, six skulls ta saw or just one?" 

"Yaaarrowlright then!" Grotsnik caved. Gadnuk threw the saw on top of the sack of heads and nodded to BoneBleeda, they were leaving.
"w-wocha gonna d-do wif 'im Boss?" Skitter stammered as Gadnuk hoisted the Gutrippas newest recruit onto his shoulder by the seat of his pants.
"I'm gonna give 'im a burna!" Gadnuk grinned.

"B-But if he sets everyfing on fire... D-den how ya gonna stop 'im?" the grot quailed at Gadnuk's sudden guffaw.

"Stupid Grot!" BoneBleeda barked as he held the door open for Gadnuk's mirthful exit. "why would we ever want to stop 'im?" he let the door slam behind him, the boom echoing in concert with the perpetual sawing of Grotsnik's surgery.   

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Love it Great story ( I think I gave Grotsnik the head in another story but I like your version a lot more so I'm changing that) very good work
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Also I think I'm gonna talk to my GM about an adventure to the arch arsonist
Made in gb
Renegade Kan Killin Orks

Northern Ireland

I wrote it to pick up where BoneBleeda's story left off. It's kind of a direct follow on from the last line "I gotta see da Dok about dis guy."

Glad you liked it. I'm thinking about adding a follow up to the 'everyone together' story detailing how Sleekit came to be on the ship with them. But it's all just vague fog of notions at this stage. if you have any more already written don't be waiting for me.

Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

I am currently working on a continuation from the last story, and has already included the Burnzerker, it's unfortunately coming together a bit slower than I like
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Ok I finished the 2nd half of the story and it is way way longer than the first one. So get cozy cus it's long.
Made in us
Stabbin' Skarboy

Da pirates life pt 2

After Grunt walked in to the terminal he didn't say a word to Gadnuk or the Gutrippas but rather simple watched him menacingly from a corner. As time passed the Huntaz, Grindaz, and Blitza Sneekas arrived in the terminal, the other mobs of Kommandos were excited serve with the infamous Gutrippas, their nobs took the opportunity to introduce themselves to Gadnuk, he had only met Spitburn before and that is because he saved him and his squad from being crushed by a Baneblade. Spitburn was tall but rather scrawny for a blood axe nob, but was by no means small by human standards. Goreslack was a sum shorter than Spitburn but was much more nob like in his thickness, he was a blood axe from a camp far from Gadnuk's, he was equal in experience to Spitburn who was barely skilled enough to be noteworthy. Bekruz was puzzling to Gadnuk he was a Evil Sunz Kommando which is the only case he has heard of, as most Evil Sunz lack the emense amount of patients that is required to be a Kommando. The only reason Gadnuk had heard of them was they stole a small fleet of imperial tanks, but have done nothing else of note beyond that one job. When Krem walked off to play a hand of cards Gadnuk took a look at his clipboard it was a manifest of the enlisted, Kommandos their numbers and their pay.
The Gutrippas boyz 15 pay 150 teef
The Huntaz boyz 10 pay 80 teef
The Grindaz boyz 8 pay 56 teef
The BlitzaSneekas boyz 20 pay 80
The BlackSkulls boyz 20 pay 0
Gadnuk shook his head as he passed the manifest to Bleeda to read, Squeeza took a peek at the manifest and snickered "Stupid Gitz fergot to negotiate fer their pay what loons" Bleeda gave the clipboard back to Gadnuk "why'd you think they do that boss" Gadnuk explained "dey ain't here fer teef dey here for us" SuigSqueeza quit his laughing "oh, zog" as Bonebleeda was about to speak Krem bellowed "Kabin on deck Kommandos front and centa" the Kommandos quickly formed a perfectish line, a feat nearly impossible for your typical Ork Boy. The pegged leg Kaptin walked forward dwarfing the nobs in the room. He was a bright Green with many scars and massive arms. He dawned stripped trousers, a Bright red coat, and a massive pirate's hat. He spoke as he inspected the Kommandos "Most good and proper Ork boyz just hop on my ship and are only payed in battle but you Kommandos are special, I pay you to get da job done dat normal boyz can't do, jobs like sneekin about and stomping gitz all quit like, but beware I don't like you kaniven lil gitz and if you fail me ya dead, plain and simple" Grinbad hobbled back and forth passing Gadnuk and arriving at the end of the line where Grunt was, he inspects the Goff and speaks "You must be the famed Gadnuk" grunt seemed insulted at the orks suggestion. Krem came out from behind the Kaptin and spoke nervously "actually boss dat one is Gadnuk" the warboss slapped Krem sending one of his few teef flying. Krem rubbed his face sorely. Grinbad came walking to Gadnuk as his mechanical pegged foot scratched the metal floors, he looked at Gadnuk with a great deal of disappointment, "so yer dis Kommando dat Dok Grotsnik ad told me about". Gadnuk was unaware of the Dok and the Kaptin speaking. "Probably me and da Dok are mates" the pirate was still skeptical looking, "Da Dok said yer one of da most Kunning and Brutal Orks he ever met, since I trust da Dok a great deal I have decided to name you Head Sneeka, as head Sneeka you are in charge of da other Kommando mobs and have a spot on my WAAAGH! council, as a reward you and yer boyz will get better quarters" Gadnuk bowed his head "You honor me boss truly you have Mork's kunning" the massive Ork pirate walked off patting Krem on the back and giving him 2 teef from his coat pocket. Krem forgot all about the pain and quickly pocketed the teef. "Right den BlackSkulls and Blitza Sneekas you going in da first kan up to da Dakkanator, da rest of you will go second." As Krem, and the BlackSkulls and The Kaptin moved out of earshot Rippa began " oh yes boss you were born wif da kunning of Mork and da strength of Gork, I bet Ghazkull himself would tremble in your presence". Gadnuk didn't look back to Rippa but calmy replied "Mr GitFingaz, Mr Skagnet restrain Mr BigRippa." Rippa struggled as the two orks grabbed him by his arms. Gadnuk was still looking at the last of the Black armored BlackSkulls enter the boarding tube "Mr BoneBleeda remind Mr BigRippa what happens when he makes fun of his boss when he is in a foul mood" Bleeda punched Rippa square in the face, as the last of the BlackSkulls entered the tube Gadnuk turned and kicked the restrained ork in the guts. Rippa spoke with the wind knocked out of him, "sorry Boss won't appen again". Gadnuk felt a little bad about hitting Rippa so hard, normally he would make a cunning rejoinder about him being a git, but he was still outraged by Grunts presence. "Don't worry about it Rippa, just not in da mood" the crew waited about an hour and Finished off the cask of rum with the help of the Grindaz and Huntaz.

As the Gutrippas shuttle drew near the Dakkanator they could tell it wasn't any regular ork Kruza, the Dakkanator had more kannons, Rokkits, Shootas, gunz, that not even the most creative Deffskull could dream of. The shuttle made its rough landing into the shuttle bay. Krem had been waiting along with two ork boyz also dressed in pirate garb. Krem ordered the smaller orks to take the Grindaz and the Huntaz to their quarters Krem would escort the Gutrippas himself. Krem had informed Gadnuk that Grunt's room was as far away from his own as possible, but that for the favor he would expect one in return.

When Gadnuk opened the door to his mobs quarters he was impressed by just how nice it was. It had apparently been the residence of a squad of flash gitz at some point, thus explaining its somewhat unorky characteristics. The room was large and rectangular, the walls were covered in a vertically stripped red and white wall paper where in certain spots the ship's metal walls could be seen. On the wall to the right was a large grandiose hearth. Above the hearth was a portrait of a large pirate ork standing triumphant over piles of corpses. The portrait was likely done by a human or an Eldar slave. Across the wall where laid the hearth was a bay window that gave a view of Armageddon that even an ork could appreciate. Along the wall where the hearth was a large variety of monstrous heads, obviously the flash gitz trophies. Lastly there was a large filthy grandiose bed, likely taken from a planetary governor. As the mob of orks came in somewhat awestruck by their new accommodation. The Burnzerker ran immediately to the hearth and sat down before the flames pushing several other orks out of the way. Blakrog stumbled as the crazed ork barreled his way through, he said "Oi watch it ya crispy lil git". Skagnet examined the room "They do all this just fer a mob of Kommandos, Imagine what da Kabin quarters are like". The orks began settling into the room unloading their gear and personal belongings, claiming small sections of the room for themselves. Each ork had a small bed roll, a small luxury as many ork boyz simple just sleep where they fall. However when Grimsnikk set his bag down, it began squirming. Gadnuk looked over his shoulder to where Grimsnikk's duffel bag, "Oi Grimsnikk, why iz yer kit moving?". Grimsnikk looked confused as he turned to his bag, "da zog" he said. As he began to unzip the large olive duffel bag he saw an angry squirming Gretchen, mouthed gagged and limbs bound. Bonebleeda shoved a few boyz out of his way to get a better view of the bag. Bleeda instantly remembered that rebellious little grot Sleekit, he looked to Grimmsnikk, "Why is dat worm in yer kit" . Grimmsnikk looked confused for a moment than came to a sudden realization. " oh yeah I member now, it was last night at da Goff party. I got really squig faced and got to finking, dat little grot dun zoggd up da mission, and I almost got krumped cus of him. So I snuck into da gits little shack and nabbed him in his sleep all sneaky like. I put him in da bag, for reasons I don't right remember, I passed out and fergot bout him." Sleekit continued to squirm against the restraints. Fingaz began speaking "Boss da grot might be useful fer acquiring new gear". Gadnuk shrugged in agreement " da grot can stay but I ain't caring fer it". Sleekit spit the gag from his mouth " I ain't doing zog fer any of ya, take me back home" the room erupted with laughter. Sleekit looked confused and ran for the window, when he saw that he was in space his high pointy ears dropped, " but who will feed my pet mouse Zippy" Grimmsnikk rummaged around his bag and pulled a small cage with a white mouse inside, "Zippy!" Sleekit Came running to the cage when Gadnuk grabbed him by his head with his thumb and index finger, " well Sleekit, it seems you got a choice ta make you stay here wif us like a good little grot, oh we send ya back to Armageddon through a Canon" Sleekit looked nervous "I'll be good boss I promise" Gadnuk looked skeptical "yer liein but you ain't stupid, zog up and it's gonna hurt" the Gretchen nodded in agreement as Gadnuk set him down. The Grot grabbed the caged mouse and fished his lucky hat from Grimmsnikk's bag. Grimmsnikk looked annoyed, "last time I get zogged up before I pack look at dis junk, three different hats, A Squig's tongue, more of Sleekits junk." Grimmsnikk continued to list all the useless junk he packed. As Grimmsnikk continued to list more and more odd possessions old Skagnet made his way to Gadnuk. "You fink dis Git Grunt is willing to leave Armageddon, to zog us over just cause you beat him in a duel, ya fink da git be a bit more grateful fer you not killing him" Gadnuk continued to unpack "Doubt he'd be here if that were all we did." Skagnet scrunched his pale green face "What else ya do". Gadnuk unpacked a crude wooden box with the familiar Bad Moon crescent. He opened the box in which lay a neat fat sack of cigars. "Won em from a Mek in an arm wrestling match". Skagnet was tempted to reach for one but knew that he would only catch a beating if he tried. Gadnuk pulled one from the box stuck it in his mouth, he then pulled a match from his trouser pocket and struck the match against his combat knife which was modified with a strike strip, a neat upgrade thought up by Fingaz. He lit his cigar and let out a puff of smoke. Skagnet joked at the Nob "I don't suppose he's ere fer yer smokes". Gadnuk smiled "That is a funny story, Rippa tells it better though". Gadnuk sat down on a old padded chair and kicked his legs up on a table, and Skagnet pulled up a box to sit. Gadnuk removed the cigar from his mouth and placed it between his index and middle finger. The nob turned his head and called "Rippa get over ere ya belcha, dis crusty old git is in the mood fer a story". The ork dropped the large ammo box on the ground and double timed it to the makeshift table. As Rippa approached the empty spool table Gadnuk began "Tell him about da second time we had a run in wif dem Black Skulls." Rippa chuckled "dat was a right good one". Gadnuk turned his attention to Sleekit, "Oi go get me and da boyz some fungus beer" Gadnuk then threw a small pouch of teef to the grot who seemed insulted by the command but then scampered out of the room allowing the automatic door to seal behind him. About 10 minutes later Sleekit returned from the booze run with a bag full of green bottles with black liquid, he chose to steal the beer rather than pay for it so he could pocket the teef. As Sleekit entered the room he sae all the orks were gathered in a sloppy ring shouting and yelling over each other. Blakrog and Squeeza were brawling, while all the others seemed to be taking bets. When Gadnuk noticed that Sleekit returned with the goods he rose from his chair and pulled the sluga he had on his hip, and fired it into the Air. Everyone in the room immediately hit the deck, until the bullet eventually ricocheted into the fireplace. Gadnuk grinned "Settle down boyz, settle down, it's story time." The orks all took spots on the floor around the table where now only Gadnuk and Rippa sat. Gadnuk addressed the mob once more, "Old Skagnet ere was just askin bout why da Black Skulls are so zoggin mad at us" the mob began to snicker. Gadnuk smiled and looked over to Rippa. Rippa took the beer that Sleekit had handed to him and he took a swig of the bottle before he began. "It all began over a Squig Pie"

Ya see da War Boss of our camp is a Blood Axe named "Commanda" Bonneyparts. Every proper Blood Axe respected Bonneyparts he always knew just where da fighting was best and da best way to win. He had beef with da neighboring Goff Warboss dis serious git by da name of SkarrGrim "da fat", who just so happens to be da boss of our old pal Grunt. Ya see Us and dem were working under da command of da dok, most of us were dere fer dat scrap wif dat omie stompa, and you all knew twere us blood axes wot did most of da work, er no offense Bleeda. After weeks of fighting we was finally able to stomp da omies dat funk dey could hide like squatts in barrel, thanks in no small part to Grimsnik. It was obvious to dat fat git we wuz gonna get all da credit, so SkarGrim had invited our camp to a feast to celebrate da "collaboration" between our two camps after da fight fer Tartarus, and we were da guests of honor. So we walk into da hall and dere he was, Grunt standin dere next to SkarGrim wif new shiny gubbins. We had all just assumed dat he never survived da Dok's operating table, or dat da dok just took him fer bitz, but dere he was bigga den ever, I don't know bout da rest of ya but when I see a ghost I make a note of it. So da night was rather tense cus Gadnuk and Grunt couldn't take der eyes off of each other. Eventually a mobs of Gretchen came scampering in, each of em was carrying a squig pie. Apparently da Goff had a particular fondness fer em, and as the night went on more pie and beer was served. When da fat git was 8 pies in he Burped at Bonneyparts "Ain't dat just da best pie you ever ad" Bonneyparts looked up from his 5th pie and spoke wif bitz of food still in his Gob "Roit good it is" a grot waiter brought them each another pie. SkarGrim did eat dat pie fasta den a Deff Skull can take yer kit. Da fat un den looked over to Bonneyparts pie and said "Oi you gonna gimme dat pie right" Bonneypart looked at him and laughed "You don't need any more pies ya fat arse". It was dis moment right ere when everything went from fun to funer. Da fat arse dun reached over to take da boss's pie, so da Boss took da fork to da gitz Grubby little fingaz. Words were said that couldn't be taken back and It quickly became an all out war with the Goffs. We barely made it out of da hall and had ta head with da boss back to our camp. Bonneyparts was in a fit insulted that after carrying his arse threw dis campaign dis was how he was repaid. Da Boss wanted da Git dead but didn't want to invest too many boyz in a scrap against a supposed ally so da Boss sent da best Kommandos he had us. So we hatched a plan. Ya see da easy part was getting into da Goff camp, we just put on a pair of black trousers and an angry face. Da ard part was getting close to da git he had da Black Skulls protecting him round da clock, so if dem gitz saw us da mission would be over like dat. So how could we kill em wif out him seeing us. So we snuck into da kitchen where da grots were cookin dem tastey little squig pies, and we put da whole vial of Purple stuff we dun got from Sleekit, into da minced squig pot. After dat was done Me, Gadnuk, and Blakrog snuck into da rafters dat were above where dat git would be eatin in da hall, while da rest of da boyz waited outside fer da signal if fings went wrong. Well after waiting up dere with da spiders and rats da git finally showed up with da Black Skulls. Well da Gretchen started serving da pies and all da boyz knew dey don't eat till da boss does. So old fatty takes da fork and is about to shovel da first bit into his gob when outa nowhere Grunt grabbs his arm. Da git says "Wait let da Gretchen taste it first" da boss looks right angry but feeds da pie to da poor little grot. Not 3 seconds later da tiny fella was on da floor wif his hands around his throat gaspin fer air. Blakrog whispered to Boss Gadnuk "told ya we shoulda put a stik bomb in dere not dat crap" Gadnuk drew his choppa slugga laughed "Its more fun dis way anyhow" he den lept from da raftas and landed on one of dem black ork boyz killing him as he landed on da gitz skull. You shoulda seen da look on dat fat gits face, he was zoggin ticked, he flipped da big table ta use fer cover. I pulled out old doom Dakka and let dem boyz have it from up top while Blakrog chucked a bomb at group of boyz and dey were set a blaze. Da boyz began busting thru da Windows, first it was burny with his Skorcha e bursted in and not a second later dem gits wuz doin da burny dance. Den Fingaz, Squeeza, and Blagnabba, broke thru da Windows and slit some boyz throats. Den Bleeda, Grimsnikk, and Zuggob broke threw the windows behind SkarGrim. Grunt had hopped the table to go fer Gadnuk slamming him thru da far wall. SkarGrim threw Grimsnikk out da window and Bleeda at us in da rafters, poor old Zuggob got ripped in two by da gitz klaw. Everywhere dere was fighting bullets were a whizzin and choppas were a chopin. It was at dat moment when Boss Bonneyparts came busting threw another wall behind SkarGrim. Bonneyparts were kitted out in full mega armor. Da two bosses did battle and The duel between the nobs had found its way back to the main hall. Grunt knocked Gadnuk down wif a lucky hit, and da git was bout to make da endin blow when smack, da git goes all limp and falls to da floor. And who is standing over da git? Well none other den old Dok Grotsnik wif a big needle in his hand. Gadnuk didn't hesitate as he got up from the ground and snuck up behind Boss SkarGrim and plunged his combat knife into his back, the boss was wounded just enough to give Bonneyparts da perfect opportunity to strike scissoring both his arms off, da fatty looked to Grunt and coughed out a bloody "avenge me". Gadnuk was right mad as he turned to the old pain boy "Da Zog Dok, I thought you just wanted him fer bitz" da dok looked at Gadnuk "sorry mate I couldn't resist. At first I was just gonna take em fer bitz, but den I got to tinkering and I saw just how well he adapted to da modifications and I couldn't help letting him loose." Gadnuk just shook his head and drew his sluga " Well no big deal nuffin a bullet to da brain won't fix" da Dok's eyes widen, "What no you can't! Lissen I know yer mad but dis un has so much potential, Let's make a deal." Bleeda limped over to Gadnuk and spoke "Boss just waste em e is only trouble fer us". Da dok then snapped his fingers and a crew of Gretchen brought a chest overflowing with teef. Grimsnikk's eyes widened "Boss das a lotta teef". Gadnuk smiled "Dok you got yerself a deal". I remember Fingaz sayin "why do I get da feelin dat we might regret dis latter" (a few of da boyz chuckled). So we and da boss hopped in a truck wif our new treasure and we rolled on out da dok did da same. But before we left we made sure to grab dat runt who made dem pies and took em wif us. When we got back to base we partied like proper orks wif fighting and drinking.

The next day Gadnuk was summoned to da boss's quarters. His quarters made Gadnuk's quarters look like a dump ( which in some regards it was however it was still high quality by ork standards ). Da boss was sitting at a grandiose desk with a large map spread out before him. The boss looked up at Gadnuk and then back at the map. The massive freebooter stuck a dagger threw da map to the Ghoul Stars "ere we headin fer ere".
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