Switch Theme:

Smirking Da Chosen One - Ch. 33 In Da Waaagh Room  [RSS] Share on facebook Share on Twitter Submit to Reddit
Author Message

Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
  • No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
  • Times and dates in your local timezone.
  • Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
  • Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
  • Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Made in gb
Stealthy Grot Snipa

Northern Ireland

Chapter 31- Da Vengeance Ov Da Godz


"Large Waaagh-dar contact off da stern Kaptain Smirking sir!"

Smirking was surprised. They all were. They were leagues from any other green skin. At least they had thought they were.

"Smudge, What can you see!"

Smudge was up in the lookout nest squinting out to sea. "Nuffink boss. Just da ocean!"

"It's closing, Kaptain Smirking Sir!" Goggz reported, "it's coming inside yer blip range."

"It's a sub!" Sleekit had it. "GrodMek is shadowing us!"

Sure enough within a short time it was all stop as a large submarine broke the surface dead ahead and the Big-Mek himself emerged from the hatch.

"You iz goin' da wrong way!" GrodMek bellowed from sea level at the face of the massive ship towering over him still some distance away.

"Sez who?" It was a grot voice that greeted him from the ship's loud speakers, a familiar one.

"If it ain't da one an' only GrotFather!" GrodMek mocked, "gerroutovit! I ain't dealin' wif you. I knows you fer da worst most backstabbin'est rebel grot ov da lot!"

"Very kind of you to say." A small figure appeared on the gunwale silhouetted against the sky. GrodMek could make out a grot in a tall Kaptain's cap. He was not interested.

"You fink I'm joking?" GrodMek fired a shot literally across the boughs and yelled again. "I've seen your hero-Grot, I knows who's in charge on dat ship an' it ain't you Sleekit. Now go get your little boss-freak out 'ere an' quit wasting my time."

"Hero Grot? You MUST mean me!" Sleekit laughed. "Der ain't no grot better, an' not runnin' dis ship, No No, No. Aaris Da Butcha is in charge of dis here Morka-Wing Karrier! So YOU best get out of his way."

"Grox Gak!" GrodMek was having none of it. "I didn't see no Morka Kaptain coming off dat Bomba, all I seen was a bunch of snivellin' grots!"

Another figure appeared on the gunwale obscuring the grot, at least three times his size. He was square set and wore a heavy coat. Aaris Da Butcha addressed the Big-Mek directly.

"What's all dis? GrodMek?" Da Butcha's voice was dripping with contempt, "Gerrout'o da way!"

"Aaris Da Zoggin' Grot-Butcha." GrodMek offered the fuller and perhaps more apt title. Really he had hoped not to see the Morka boss alive again but he supposed personally killing him wouldn't hurt business much this far outside of ork territory.

"GrodMek! When I get my hands round your throat I'll rip yer head off and feed yer squishy bitz to da Whale-Squigz!" Aaris was a subtle negotiator.

GrodMek squinted at the shadowy figures on the BizMork. That wasn't Aaris. The voice was an uncanny impression for sure but that ork up there... For all the fury of Da Butcha's bile his fists, normally flying, were just stuffed down into his coat pockets. GrodMek was growing more suspicious by the minute. And whoever it was he was nowhere near as big as the Morka Big-boss. He wore the trademark coat and hat but, was that a beard? Surely it wasn't that hair-squig ridden buffoon UzKop. Of course, it had to be; he'd seen UzKop's Dakka-Jet landing on the deck, against orders he might add.

"UzKop you stupid burk!" GrodMek called him out on the spot, "I though I told all you fancy fly-boyz ta zog off!" The ork on the BizMork shifted a little uneasily, "You woz all s'posed to head fer GulGogz Landinz. Da GorkaFleet boats wot shot up da MekWorx at RedRoxx is goin' dat way!" GrodMek's plans were already in tatters and this good for nothing bearded wastrel was trying his patience. "You hangin' round 'ere takin' orders from Grotz now izzit?"

There was no replay. The larger figure on the gunwale simply shuffled off and disappeared without a word.

GrodMek grinned and continued "I'm done playing your games Sleekit. I'll dive this sukka an put a pair of torpedoes in your hull right an' quick if you don't fetch me yer boss out right-da-zog now. An' I don't mean dat stupid burk Aaris either, its Smirking! I wants to speak to Smirking!"

This wasn't working. They had planned to keep the Big-Mek talking with Sleekit or Aaris or WazzBad even but Smirking? What was Smirking going to say? He'd hardly said two words on his own behalf this last year, now he was going to have to speak for everyone.

After an awkward pause a bat-winged grot shuffled reluctantly to the fore. He wore an elaborate head dress of seagrass with a large red star emblazoned on the front. The figure ascended the lower bar of the gunwale in full view of his audience below and proudly displayed his full impressive three and a half feet of wing span.

GrodMek couldn't resist a pot-shot at his favourite albatross but ork marksmanship being what is, he missed by a long way.

"Behold da Chosen One!" Smirking's less than commanding grot voice commanded. "Bow down before me or... Wait."

There seemed to be a discussion going on.
"I can't say dat!"
"Just repeat da words."
"But itz ridiculous!"
"It'z da will ov da Godz, now say da line!"

Smirking composed himself. "Big-Mek GrodMek, by da Will ov da Godz I command you..." he began without conviction. "Obey da Chosen One. Get yer boat out of our way and don't hinder our sacred quest!"

GrodMek could hardly talk for laughing. His mirth devolved into a coughing fit that left him breathless and giddy.

"Laugh all ya likes, GrodMek. It'z da Godz wot will be laughing last."

"Oh give it a rest Smirking." GrodMek complained, "You didn't used to be da 'oly rolla type, wots got inta you?"

What indeed.

"Now I came all da way out 'ere after your snivellin' grot arse to give you a message." GrodMek continued. "GorGoff is alive an' well, Smirking, and he ain't happy. Not wif me, not wif you and Gork-help you Sleekit he's gonna rip you a new one!"

"He can get Zogged!" Came the GrotFather's reply.

"Oh yes, I agree, I do." GrodMek nodded most reasonably, "And dat's why I sent all available fliers off da BizMork to bomb his fleet at GulGog's Landin's. You heard about RedRox? Every airfield on all five islands laid to waste in retaliation for da Gargantic. Da MorkaWing needz da BizMork, Smirking! If you go now we can still catch GorGoff before..."

"We has seen your plans, Big-Mek." Sleekit interrupted most impudently, "You weren't for sendin' da BizMork to take on GorGoff. Dis ship was cruisin' for GulGog's alright but it woz rigged to go boom."

"Wot? GrodMek protested his innocence, "No, No! It's a plan for vengeance, I was gonna sail it right up aside oneov dem new GorkFleet MegaKroozas an..."

A sudden voice broke in like a thunderous rolling wave.
"You has seen our wrath kindled once before, Mek," It certainly wasn't a grot voice. It was deep and cold and hard like seabed granite. "We deliver da vengeance ov da Godz on da Oomans, not on our own; and you will not stop uz."

A flicker of a memory briefly shook the Big-Mek's confidence. The eyes, the raw power of Smirking, the grot possessed. Still, he had seen him off once before, he could do it again. GrodMek checked the charge of his kustom force field. The dial pointed to 'Plenty'o'Waaagh!' And besides, at the end of the day it was just a grot!

"I ain't for movin'!" GrodMek bellowed defiant. "You'll mess up da whole fing. We got a good scrap goin' on here. Don't go an' bring da Oomans in onit."

"Da Oomans is da propa scrap!" Smirking declared "Da only reason you want 'em out ov it is cause you can't make teef off of Oomans. You is gettin' rich pushin' Gorkas and Morkas at eachovver but if dey start fightin' Oomans, like we should be, den it'll mean a real Waaaagh and you'd have to make more'n one lousy grot bomb to win dat fight."

GrodMek was furious. Being told what-for by a smart-arse grot was about his least favourite pastime. Especially by one with such keen insight. He seethed and grabbed his blasta, letting off a half dozen rounds in the general direction of the BizMork. He missed. The two grot figures high up on the hulking vessel's bow remained, defiant. He hadn't even seen them flinch. Well, he thought. He'd show them what good a grot rebellion would get you.

Still grumbling he reached down into his boot for his telescopic sight. Pulling it open he raised it to his bionik-eye and plugged it in. Zooming in tight to the figures on the BizMork he could at last see them in better detail.

He didn't like what he was seeing.

That wasn't Sleekit, for a start. The GrotFather was a very familiar face in GrodMek's world but this grot, well he had glasses on for a start and the hat he wore looked half burnt to a cinder. The Smirking figure too was an imposter in wings. Some daft looking clown dressed up to look the part. GrodMek was spitting mad. What was their game? Who had he been talking to? How?

The answer hit him like a sudden break in the clouds. They were in his head, talking to him like WazzBad used to. The two imposters up there were trying to distract him!

But it was too late. Smirking was already upon him. Coming from behind, dripping sea-water and twitching with raw barely-contained power the grot clambered up GrodMek's back-pack and made a swipe at the nobbly dome of the Big-Mek's kustom rebuilt kranium. GrodMek ducked and shrugged him off, sending Smirking sprawling across the upper deck of the Salvage Sub. He grabbed a guard-rail and sprang back to his feet to face his foe.

"You can't touch me, yer freak!" GrodMek growled with his wide more-teeth-than-most grin. He appeared to be expecting something to occur but nothing happened. Confused he checked the charge on his kustom force field again.

Plenty'o Waaagh!

He banged on the gauge frantically. Why wasn't it working?

Smirking held a pair of wires in one tight little grot fist. They might have linked the ork's brain to his fancy protective gubbinz but this time it was not to be. They fell from his hand and GrodMek watched them slip down the side of the sub into the sea. He blinked in slow sad comprehension.

Smirking took a step forward, wings billowing behind him, somehow in the opposite direction of the prevailing wind. He stretched out his hands toward GrodMek, a mad malevolent light glowing in his eyes, skin prickling, spine tingling, and let the Big-Mek have it.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2020/01/26 01:03:05

Made in gb
Stealthy Grot Snipa

Northern Ireland

Chapter 32- Unnatural Order


The Big-Mek's lifeless body slumped upon the deck as Smirking twitched and convulsed like a mad thing, his fingers still outstretched smoking in the breeze.

A nervous crew of grots in a little galley came alongside and Smudge took command of the situation. The Big-Mek was stripped of a few choice items before his carcass was unceremoniously buried at sea. It slid off the sub and obligingly sunk beneath the waves, and not a moment too soon.

"Oi, gitz" it was GrodMek's chief Spanna, the one they called GitFingaz, poking his head out the hatch. "Where's da boss!"

Smudge turned coolly and told him a bare-faced lie.

"He went up to da BizMork to talk wif Aaris."

"He wot?"

"He says we have to heave to. You got some ropes and that?" Nurd didn't wait for an answer but stepped on over the incredulous Spanna's head and proceeded to unlock a stowage box. Producing a thick steal cable he tossed one end to another grot. "Here Grunt, tie 'er off."

GitFingaz climbed out on deck and gave Smirking a questioning look. "Wot's up wif dis guy?"

Smirking was taking a little while to regather his faculties. He was a gibbering mess.

"Um, he's a bit scared of GrodMek... Oi! Swab!" He yelled to a likely grot lackey, "mop him up will ya," he indicated that Smirking needed clearing off the deck. "Orks is on da deck!" He added with feigned deference to the newcomer.

"An' where is GrodMek?" Fingaz was looking around the Biz-Mork for any sign of the Big-Mek.

Smudge instantly regretted reminding the ork of his missing boss. "He went on ahead," he assured the ork vaguely.

Fingaz spotted an item in Smudge's hands. "Wots dat?" It looked familiar, like a piece off one of GrodMek's personal gubbins. Smudge had to think quick.

"Oh yeah, he said you'd know what to do wif it." He tossed the pilfered piece to Fingaz without further comment and then quickly produced a flask. "Fancy a swig O' Rott?"

* * * * *

Smirking awoke to find his hands were already busy tinkering and adjusting. The small machine of dubious quality he had been building was quickly hidden behind his own back. GrodMek was having difficulty adapting to the idea of sharing his latest inventions with the other inhabitants of Smirking's crowded brain.

Smirking blinked and took note of his surroundings. He was back on the Biz-Mork in the Kaptains Ready Room. The wash of emotions from all directions was nauseating. The familiarity and security of a homecoming from Aaris warred with the intense resentment and avarice of GrodMek. The BigMek's plans and devices cluttered up the Kaptain's table and even the fact that the Kaptain's chair provided more than ample room for Smirking's grotly rear did nothing to quell the rising animosity between the two. WazzBad who harboured no such feelings for the place and wanted nothing more than to be out of there foreswore all claim to the Kaptain's chair as BlackGull sitting in judgement as ever claimed it all wholly in the name of Da Chosen One. Sleekit was furiously calculating his options and preparing to throw his conniving support behind he likeliest candidate when suddenly Smirking threw up.

The projectile vomit was a thing of dire consequence. Viscous and sparking with lethal energies it spewed forth upon the table and instantly destroyed both plans and furnishings alike. A green flame erupted and belched dense oily spoke as it consumed the table and its contents.

All thoughts of interpersonal rivalry were momentarily suspended as all beheld the grotesque outpouring of the their contentious bickering with unanimous admiration. Smirking was becoming a proper warp-head and no mistake. Feeling a little better already he plonked his boney behind down in the Kaptain's chair uncontested and beheld his handiwork as a cluster of Fire-grots burst in and doused the smouldering ruin with buckets of sand and sea water.

Smirking spoke not a word as they laboured to neutralise his boiling vomit but simply presided in his position of power. The stuff was potent for all the small amount of it but soon the grot clean up crew had it contained and they quickly decided to shuffle away out of sight. As the smoke began to clear Smirking became aware that one remained waiting by the ruin of the desk anxiously wringing his hands. It was Nurd.

"What's going on?" Smirking croaked, his throat a little worse for wear.

The relief on the other grot's face was palpable and he immediately launched into a desperate tirade.

"Smudge told 'em GrodMek was here, boss." Nurd blurted in a panic, "He had to! We've left 'em all on da Sub but you know orks, dey won't listen to Grotz an' dey won't wait for long. Dey'll be up on da BizMork soon an' when dey finds out dere's nuffink but Grotz up 'ere were all done for!" He took a long breath. "Smudge is keepin' da chief Spanna sweet wif a bottle o' Rott but it ain't gonna last!"

Smirking silenced Nurd with a swift flap of his winged arm and held the gesture while his inner thoughts conversed.

"We gotta keep em on da sub" Sleekit squeaked.

"Dem's MY ladz, yer grot git!" sulked GrodMek

"Well dey ain't welcome 'ere!" Aaris bellowed.

"Dey're your ladz too, some ov'em."

"No way!" yelled Sleekit, "No Meks, no Runthurds, none of yer big dumb Morka goons! They'll ruin everything!"

"We needs 'em, grot!" BlackGull pointed out, "Da Godz needs all da orks to come togevver!"

"An' what? Follow orders from grotz?" Sleekit wailed, "They won't do it!"

"It ain't natural!"

"It ain't propa orky."

Smirking nodded. It was plain ork sense, they all agreed.

"Dey'll follow Da Chosen One!" BlackGull asserted, "It's da will of da Godz! Dey can't refuse."

"If dey take one look at Smirking dey will." Aaris scoffed, "One squeaky order outa him an' my Runthurds'll feed 'im to da Squighounds. Morkalmighty, he's such a runt we could feed him to Mogz!"

"Oh, Mogz." WazzBad was suddenly interested at the mention of the Ship's Squig. Smirking jumped down from his seat and started making little squiggly noises but Mogz did not appear. Nurd shifted uneasily eyeing the mad grot with concern and growing alarm.

"I don't think we oughta let 'em see you like dis, boss." said Nurd backing away slowly. "I'm just gonna close dis door and you can call if you need anyfing."

"Dat's it!" Smirking yelled still twitching and ticking, trying to cram the exuberant ork personalities into some semblance of order. "Dey won't see us! We'll let 'em on da BizMork but we'll stay here and run da ship from da ready room."

"Oh yeah, dat'll work fine." Sleekit whined sarcastically, "The invisible Kaptain wif da squeaky voice on da loud speakaz."

"My boyz won't follow nobody but me!" Aaris declared.

"I dunno, Aaris, dey took orders from me jus' fine." GrodMek sniggered. "But I ain't no grot."

The collective force of every other inhabitant of Smirking's head made his eyes roll with enough torque to pull a Krooza into a dry-dock. "You might wanna look in da mirror, Grodderz." WazzBad giggled, "You'z in here wif us now."

"Well I'm... Wot it is is..." GrodMek fumbled for the right words but he was already way out of his depth.

"UzKop can do it!" Smirking blurted. He wasn't sure whose idea that was and nobody was claiming credit.

"Dat hairy Lug!"

"No zoggin' way!"

"Wot? Why not?" pleaded Smirking, "Anuvva ork voice? It might work."

"My chief Spanna GitFingaz won't do nuffink for UzKop!" bellowed GrodMek with all authority, "If it ain't my voice givin' da orderz...,"

Smirking leapt into the air, he had it! "Da Spanna, Smudge's Gut-Rott brew!" Smirking capered and yelled, "He's been drinking da stuff!"

"Sure, he's a slacker if I ain't about!" agreed GrodMek. "On'y works if he's cornered like a rat in a trap."

"I don't allow no Rott on my ship." preached Aaris, "Zaps yer discipline it does, slows ya down."

"Kan-it yer lugz." BlackGull snapped, "Da Chosen One iz talkin'!"

"Wot, da grot?" GrodMek, a little late to the party was still playing catch-up.

"He meanz Smirking. Smirking Da Chosen One."

"He's wot?"

"Look, neva mind! All we needs is more Gut-Rott." Smirking explained.

"More Rott? He's lost it, he has."

"I told you already..."

"Dis is wot you get when you lets grotz do da finking."

"KAN IT!!!"

"Nurd!" Smirking turned to his somewhat unwilling audience. Nurd was one mad plan away from a nervous breakdown.

"Give 'em more Rott." Smirking's eyes were alive with more than a spark of madness, "All ov'em! Every ork on da sub. We're 'avin' us a big party on da BizMork and dey're all invited."

"Errr, ok boss." Nurd wasn't exactly following the plan but he was happy to have some direct orders for a change.

"And lock the door." Smirking continued.

"Err, you're not going to da party, Boss?"

"No, Nurd. We'll stay here."

"But I wanna go to da party." WazzBad moaned.

"No, we gotta stay outa sight til all da orks has all got brain-rott... "

"Comes of drinkin' too much Rott. Makes it easy for WazzBad to mess wif yer head."

"Easy for us now, Aaris." Sleekit pointed out. "And if we stays outa sight, an' all da orks hears is Aaris and GrodMek givin' da orders dey won't see no grot doin' da bossin', see?"

"It'll Neva work." Grumbled GrodMek.

"Dey'll all be off their 'eads!" Aaris complained, "you can't give orders to drunken Rott-addled zog-wits!"

"You got a better plan?" Smirking stamped and folded his arms, furrowing his brows in a stern expression.

For once the voices in his head fell silent.

He stepped back to the Kaptain's chair and planted his little green behind.

"Alright den." Da Chosen One resolved to take up his command to Kaptain Da BizMork to the will of Da Godz by any means necessary. He turned to Nurd and gave the order.
"Tell Smidge to Brew up some Rott. Invite da boyz over and lock dat door."

Made in gb
Stealthy Grot Snipa

Northern Ireland

Chapter 33 In da Waaagh Room


GrodMek was not an easy personality to live with, so resentful was he at being deceived and outmanoeuvred, and by a grot no less. He skulked around in Smirking's sub-conscious, a passive-aggressive voice snarking at their plans and keeping his own council. Despite his apparent situation, as one of five personalities now inexplicably trapped in the mind of a grot GrodMek was in no mood to co-operate.

Sleekit however, knew the Big-Mek well, and knew that the best way to coax him into action was to play on his pride.

"So, Boss GrodMek," he began with respect, "We saw your plans. And I gotta say we was impressed, wasn't we impressed boyz?"

A reluctant chorus of assent came from the assembled orks in Smirking's head. They weren't too sure where the wily grot was going with this. WazzBad in particular was dubious. His "Yeah, dead impressed." held more than a hint of sarcasm.

"We had 'em all laid out 'ere on Kaptain Aaris'z table." best give the Kaptain his due, Sleekit thought, "but we didn't get a real good look, did we fella's?"

"Nah, not really." admitted Aaris somewhat disinterested.

"See GrodMek, I thought, since you're 'ere an' all you could explain it a bit." Sleekit continued with all the feigned enthusiasm he could muster. "The boat was gonna be all fitted up with some kinda thingy on da front, like for bashin' wif?"

"It's a reinforced ram." GrodMek explained sulkily.

"Yeah, yeah, you said it better a reinforced thingy."

"But dat don't make sense." Smirking chipped in, seeing how Sleekit was drawing GrodMek out. "If you rams anuvva boat, even wif one of those you'll probably just get all jammed up togevver an' both sink."

"No, no! Dumb grotz!" GrodMek couldn't abide such idiocy being attributed to his grand plan, "da ship's not for rammin' uvva boats, it's for rammin' into da docks. It needs da ram to bust froo da sea gates."

"And den what?" Sleekit squeaked with excitement, "tell 'em da best bit, GrodMek. Tell 'em about da BOOM!"

"I likes a good Boom, I do." WazzBad was getting interested now, he wanted to hear about the boom.

"Den da whole fing goes BOOM!" confirmed GrodMek with enthusiasm. Sleekit squealed with glee on cue and Smirking's hands clapped with WazzBad's unrestrained excitement.

"Yeah!" GrodMek chuckled "Ol' GulGog won't know what hit 'im!"

"Oh, but that was da old plan." Sleekit jumped in quickly, "We can't make a full frontal attack on da GulGog'z dock yardz; you said it yourself, Now they've got Gorka support, plenty as big as dis boat and twice as shooty!" It was true, the ship would be blown out of the water long before it hit the docks.

"We got no air cover for dat!" Aaris complained.

"I could fly Uzza's bird," WazzBad supposed, "He won't like dat but..."

Sleekit jumped back in before the Morkas got any ideas of their own.
"No, GrodMek, it's your new plan I'm excited about."

"Da one where we krumps da Oomans?" BlackGull nudged rather too pointedly.

"Oh it's genius, Boss." Sleekit enthused, desperately clawing GrodMek back on-board. "Tell 'em about the remote."

"Oh yeah, well... err." GrodMek wasn't exactly sure he was following but he didn't want to look dumb in front of the others, so he stuck to what he knew. "Well da remote control, it's da crucial bit see?"

"Dat's right, GrodMek." Sleekit encouraged.

"It's what keeps us far far away when da boat goes Boom."

"We'll be safe and sound back on da BizMork." The GrotFather declared happily.

"An' ready for a propa fight!" Aaris added. He didn't like all this low down sneaky remote control business.

"Well no, but see." GrodMek was floundering, "it's da ship wot goes... I mean, da BizMork is wot..."

"It's da heart of da operation, yes." Sleekit interjected, "Here in da Waaagh room where your plans become a reality, boss."

"Yeah but, in da plan it's da BizMork dat goes Boom!"

The trick was beginning to falter. Smirking spotted an opportunity for a neat observation and directed their gaze to the mess on the floor. The table, whereupon GrodMek's original plans now lay in ruin, destroyed by Smirking's sudden bout of psychic vomit. The old plan was manifestly no more.

"It was a draft, am I right?" Sleekit prompted. "Phase one; the forerunner to the real thing."

"Well, I mean, you gotta test these fings." GrodMek hedged.

"Yeah, an' it worked!" Sleekit nudged, "Your brilliant scheme, da remote, da ram, da great big boom, course it worked! And now combined with da stealthy sneakiness of da salvage Sub. I mean, it's genius, Boss. Da humans will never see dat comin' til it surfaces right in their stupid pink faces and then BOOM!" Sleekit moved in for the clincher. "Dats why you're da Big-Mek, Boss. You gots da know-wots! I mean, dat Chief Spanna, wotsizname," he continued his assault, hardly allowing GrodMek a second to process what he was hearing.

"GitFingaz." GrodMek offered the only solid piece of information he felt he could rely on.

"GitFingaz!" Sleekit allowed his contempt to flow, "He ain't no Big-Mek. You're gonna have to explain da plan slowly to dat guy."

"Yeah, he don't know gak." GrodMek agreed.

"But you know wot, Boss." Sleekit began to hammer his message home,"I'm just a little grot. I'm not sure I got this straight."

"Yeah, me too." Smirking added a little redundantly.

"I mean, you're da brainz of dis operation GrodMek; grotz can't come up wif dis kind of teknical know-wots."

"Well dats true." GrodMek nodded, it made perfect sense.

"So jus' so's we all understand." Sleekit had him now, "We put a reinforced ram on da Sub, just like you designed it."


"I mean, your ladz do it, GitFingaz an' da rest of da Mek-boyz. Dey'll do anyfink you tells 'em."

"Zoggin' right dey will." GrodMek affirmed with boss-like confidence.

"We fills it wif bomz, and sneaks it right up to da Oomans' door step, under da surface, like, cause wot's sneakier dan a Sub?"

"Nuffink, dat's wot!"

"And we is in control."

"Remote control!"

"Dat's right GrodMek, watching da biggest Boom WazzBad ever seen!" Sleekit knew his audience. WazzBad's enthusiasm made Smirking caper and clap.

"Waaagh!" yelled GrodMek. The feeling was infectious.

"A Waaagh on Oomans!" BlackGull roared like an ocean swell.

"They'll follow da trail back to da BizMork at RedRoxx." Sleekit nudged Aaris who responded on cue.

"An' we'll be ready for 'em. We'll have led 'em right into out trap!"

"Yes!" GrodMek was loving his plan, he was a true genius of epic capacity.

"All da orks'll be waiting, ready for a fight! Morka's and Gorka's togevver, krumpin' on da Oomans!" BlackGull preached, "They'll answer da call of Da Chosen One."

"And it's all because of you GrodMek." Sleekit closed the trap, "it just wouldn't be possible without you."

"Well let's get to work!" GrodMek cried, "what are we waiting for?"

"Nuffink, Boss." Sleekit confirmed, hoping the Gutt-Rott party below decks was now in full flow. Smirking's hand fell upon the ship's vox and turned the dial. "Jus' give da order."

"All right you lot!" GrodMek bellowed into the speaking tube. The grot squeak over the loud speakers was drowned out by the sheer brutality of the psychic assault as GrodMek's command was broadcast clear and with all authority right to the Rott-addled minds of every ork on board. More than one head exploded on the spot. He most definitely had their attention.
"Report to your crew details and tool up on deck at da double. I got da plan of a lifetime and you lugwitz is gonna make it happen!"

As Sleekit gloried in the dance of his puppet a cold rumbling voice grated on his nerves.

"You're dangerous, grot." It was Aaris Da Butcha. He'd been shocked to witness the ease with which the cunning little grot had done a number on GrodMek. "I've got my eye on you." He growled threateningly. "You try any of your tricks on me an' I'll..."

"Oh, kan it Aaris, an' find us sumfink for da Big-Mek to draw up his plans on, will ya."

Smirking went grumbling through the Kaptain's belonging's as the assembled company in the Waaagh Room got to work.

Forum Index » Dakka Fiction
Go to: