Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Due to my illness my social life has taken a massive hit, i can no longer go out every week and 'stay the night' with some girl i met at the bar/nightclub. Not to mention my teenage confidence has somewhat abandoned me. I am also kinda tired of keeping my nerdy interests secret. Should i resort to internet dating? Is it the ultimate taboo or a good way to meet like minded people. I don't know anything about the websites but i am strangely tempted...

I don't know about in England, but in the US it can be effective. You'll spend more time working on it, but less money than a conventional type system.

Yes, craigslist....its like Russian roulette. You might end up with a hottie, you might meet a homeless gypsy girl. Always an adventure, and you'll damn sure get laid.

Statistically speaking, yes it does work. Better than normal dating in fact, in terms of how well the relationships go. At least that's what I've heard. If its true, I guess they really aren't BSing you when they say they work.

If you are better at expressing yourself in short snippets of writing and being attractive in photographs than displaying charisma and being very aggressive in social situations, than online dating can be a good option. Still, girls you meet online will always have kind of a stigma to them in your mind, I guess. At least they did with me. Kinda like, if she is so great why does she have to go online? Unfair, but its a mind trap.

What silverthorne said. As for e-relationships working out better statistically I think its because the people that use them are looking for a more solid relationship rather than an easy lay or some fun for a few weeks. Those that are looking for some quick fun won't have to resort to the web to find it.

Personally, I don't think I could ever do it. Aside from the fact that I am the least photogenic person on the planet (thats not to say I'm bad looking, just that I do not photograph well at all), it just kinda seems... wrong...

Can't agree with Silverthorne on the stigma element. I think that's very much a personal thing. I understand what he's saying, but it wouldn't be an issue at all for me.

I'm married, but can't believe how many truly fantastic women I know that are available and can't seem to find a bloke who's not a complete tosser.

BloodQuest wrote:Can't agree with Silverthorne on the stigma element. I think that's very much a personal thing. I understand what he's saying, but it wouldn't be an issue at all for me.

I'm married, but can't believe how many truly fantastic women I know that are available and can't seem to find a bloke who's not a complete tosser.

They only seem great to you becuase you are looking at them through prison bars. MWAHAHAHAHAHA

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Some women I have met online lied completely on their profiles, others we're wonderful girls who just weren't ready for what I was looking for. I personally find it much harder to meet someone online then in real life. It dosn't work for me, but it does work for others, I know people who met online, and are still together 12 years later.

Are you looking for a soulmate or just some action?

Advertisers on mainstream site don't want nerds.

Local hook ups trawling alternative sites need not know and will not care.

I met my wife on a dating site after I split from my ex so I will testify as to their effectiveness.

I have friends that have gotten engaged as a result of online dating, and it certainly seems to be working for them.

As I understand it, the biggest thing is choosing the right site. I believe both of the friends in question used eHarmony.com.

It works very well. Nuff said.

I wish you luck

I don't know about actual dating sites, but I met my wife through a Doctor Who internet forum. We and a few others organised a meet up and the two of us just got along well and decided to see each other again.

I have had some small success with my experiments in online dating I have gotten, for lack of a better expression, to "second or third base" more than once, made a number of good friends, advanced my career (such as it is) and made at least one super hot girlfriend jealous.

*phew*

It is also a "student" thing although honestly women are into it more than you might think they are.

Check out PoF and OkCupid. And try to have some kind of abs/ education/ employment.

Oh and eHarmony is very popular with monogamous types. What do you want? What are you looking for? doodoodoo matches you up with the neighboring city/ state/ province whatever hope they have a nice picture.

It doesn't really change anything. If you've got what it takes to make it elsewhere, you'll see success online too. If you're a hopeless case who can't get so much as first date in person, simply trying the online approach won't change that. If you've met with moderate success in real life, you might see some results if you put in some effort online.

Ultimately though an attractive person is still attractive, and an unattractive person is still unattractive. Putting another small layer of distance between yourself and the other party really won't change that all much either way.

I tried an internet relationship a few years ago, and it was an unmitigated disaster for me. We didn't get to see each other until about a year after we had started "going out," and I was basically treated like a not-that-close friend who'd come to visit, rather than someone who she'd been dating for a year. Three days after I left to go home she broke up with me.

However, I'm currently in a long-distance relationship (which isn't that long distance, I live near Philadelphia and she lives in Annapolis/goes to school in Ithaca NY, so about a 3 hour drive either way.) It's easily the best relationship I've been in, and we keep in touch online constantly.

HOWEVER. I feel the need to point something out. There is a BIG difference between a long-distance relationship and an internet relationship. While they tend to overlap, a long-distance relationship typically starts out when you met a person in real life, are attracted to them, and ask them out knowing that they live far away. An internet relationship is when you don't meet the person face to face first. In my opinion, you need to meet the person as soon as possible, because regardless of how well you get along via the web, you never truly know what they're like until you see them in person.

Internet relationships are still quite possible and can be very healthy, and turn into something special. But my advice is to try and meet the person you're interested in first - it can make a big difference.

Just my 2 cents.

Is the OP talking about meeting someone through an online service and then trying to have a relatiionship in real life or are you talking about conducting a relationship largely over the internet and never seeing each other in real life?

I've had no luck. Probably has to do with me having issues or unrealistic expectations but I've had no luck...

Howard A Treesong wrote:I don't know about actual dating sites, but I met my wife through a Doctor Who internet forum. We and a few others organised a meet up and the two of us just got along well and decided to see each other again.

The essential basis of any relationship is that you actually have to meet someone, somewhere, somehow. Online dating sites are just another way of making that initial contact, whether or not anything comes of it is completely up to the people involved. My brother-in-law's brother-in-law met his wife through an online dating site about five years back, just had their third kid, and are one of those gloriously in love families that you'd think only exist in Hallmark special movies. On another board I post on, one guy was asking for help because he never had any luck at dating sites, and when he posted the contents of his profile it was a mopey, 'my life sucks and I'm doing nothing with it,' and his posts included a rant about how shallow women were because they never wrote him back, and they never answered his IMs, even when they were in the middle of checking out his profile (and a tip - pictures say a lot about you, so if all of yours have you wearing a :| expression while doing nothing interesting...). The problem in that case was completely centered between chair and keyboard, and not with the site or anyone else.

I tried it once and it worked well in the sense that I went on dates, one of which resulted in a brief fling that thankfully didn't go anywhere (she was ok but had a complex about her ex-boyfriend).

However, in the same year, I met Mrs Flashman as a direct result of staying in on a Friday night watching sci-fi on the box.

My flatmate and his girlfirend were going out and she wandered into the lounge whilst he was getting ready and said that one of her friends was into the show I was watching (Firefly). I made some joke about setting us up and I am now married with a 6 month old baby.

Internet is the best and easiest way to get a booty call while you suck down cheetos in your bathrobe. Sadly, sometimes they are slightly mentally ill.

Nothing wrong with meeting someone online. I met my GF on Match.com. My only mistake was leaving other accounts that I forgot about still active for her to discover one day. So my advice is to stick to one site at a time Don't rush it and think you'll find the love of your life next week.

I can't speak on the online thing with personal experience. I was married before online romance really hit the "Boom!"

On a smaller scale, though, I met my wife via the newspaper classifieds.

I was working a job with no romantic prospects, had tired of the bar scene and had few friends where I was living at the time, having moved halfway across the country.

That was 15 years ago. My oldest daughter (hers from her 1st marriage) just had my second grandkid this year, my son (from the first, again) just got married this year, and I've got 2 young ones in my home, now.

Yeah. I'd say it can work.

Eric

Id say its hit and miss, and really depends on how much effort you put in. Ive met some women from the net, sometimes it works out and they are cool. Other times they are talking about your future childrens names before the meal arrives at your plate.

I'd have to say it would be hit or miss...

You could meet her...



...Or you might meet her...



....Either way...both will probably be bat gak crazy.

FITZZ wrote: I'd have to say it would be hit or miss...

You could meet her...



...Or you might meet her...



....Either way...both will probably be bat gak crazy.

Reading your post hurt my eyes.

First pic: Ooh, she's nice

Second pic: GAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you're an idiot, no way. Too many people get suckered and that's why whenever it's mentioned people get touchy. Also if you're trying to find someone really specific, FORGET IT.

I myself met my wife on the internet and spent almost 2 years being straight up with her. She's a great lady and i lucked out finding a really pretty lady who was just sick of asian guys & detests rich dudes who act snobby. I tore her intentions apart, and made sure she knew EVERYTHING about me. Eventually I flew out there & it's been happily ever after (you know, besides the everyday issues everyone has to deal with! lol)

It works for sure. People pay good money to find a wife/ husband over sites like eharmony ect.
You just have to be smart and straight up... and don't ever fall for girls who are too eager!

to but it bluntly IMO, they don't

One of my friends met her current boyfriend on Plenty of Fish about six months ago. They just moved in together, and they seem very happy. Another friend of mine met her husband on a WOW server.