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So, some how my speaking professor has allowed me to do my informative speech on 40k

I'm trying to put together my attention getter (the beginning), and this is what I have so far:

"In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, there is only war. The Imperium of Man is surrounded on all sides by alien forces. Barbaric green skinned Orks fight merely for the joy of fighting, while the ancient Eldar cling to their dying civilization. The Emperor’s elite soldiers, the Space Marines, battle the numberless Tyranids, and the Marxist Tau. All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world."

What do you guys think?
I need a wrap up to this little narrative. What do you guys suggest?
This speech is going to be given to my speaking class, and no one in there knows what warhammer is. I'm going for the Imperial perspective, as that is the most relatable. Anything else you guys can think of that I left out? I know I didn't talk about Dark Eldar, WH, DH, or Chaos Marines, but I want to keep this pretty short.

Thanks!

Paraphrase the quip from Rogue Trader to finish it off:

To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. The universe is a big place and, whatever happens, you will not be missed.

I'm gonna have to force you to call the tau "Unified"

Besides that, the intros to the fluff parts of the races in the BRB is a great place to get inspiration for how to introduce the universe.

And have pictures, they will REALLY help.

The DE are opportunistic raiders.

The WH should be considered the warriors of the ecclesiarchy. Same with the DH.

Not exactly sure about how to sum up chaos... other than that they are strong, and recruiting! (good dental benefits!)

I don't know what "speaking" is within the terms of reference of the US education system.

Is it declamation, debate, lecturing?

Kilkrazy wrote:I don't know what "speaking" is within the terms of reference of the US education system.

Is it declamation, debate, lecturing?

At a guess i'd say it's something to do with giving speechs and the like...
Though i haven't heard of it before... sounds fun though
And i would change marxist Tau to something else... not sure what though

Kilkrazy wrote:I don't know what "speaking" is within the terms of reference of the US education system.

Is it declamation, debate, lecturing?

Generally a public speaking/speech giving dealie.

Marxist might not be the best word to use for the Tau. You could say idealistic, alien, deceptive, or what have you.

PraetorDave wrote:So, some how my speaking professor has allowed me to do my informative speech on 40k

I'm trying to put together my attention getter (the beginning), and this is what I have so far:

"In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, there is only war. The Imperium of Man is surrounded on all sides by alien forces. Barbaric green skinned Orks fight merely for the joy of fighting, while the ancient Eldar cling to their dying civilization. The Emperor’s elite soldiers, the Space Marines, battle the numberless Tyranids, and the Marxist Tau. All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world."

What do you guys think?
I need a wrap up to this little narrative. What do you guys suggest?
This speech is going to be given to my speaking class, and no one in there knows what warhammer is. I'm going for the Imperial perspective, as that is the most relatable. Anything else you guys can think of that I left out? I know I didn't talk about Dark Eldar, WH, DH, or Chaos Marines, but I want to keep this pretty short.

Thanks!

Repetition can be bad and I agree with what Brother SRM said. Conclude it with that. I would adjust "Barbaric green skinned Orks fight merely for the joy of fighting," with "The barbaric green skinned Orks wage war for the mere pleasure of fighting.." or some such non-sense. It also seems like you're suggesting that the Space Marines are just slapping Tyranids around and not everyone else. I believe you might also be marginalizing the importance of the Imperial Guard. "The Emperor's elite soldiers, the Astartes, are the heavy hand of Humanity, whilst the Imperial Guard is the bulwark of Mankind. In tandem these forces keep the nasties of the grimy darkness of the future at bay." Of course, you can supplant that last bit with whatever you want.

Good luck, put the fear of the God-Emperor into that class.

But remember the big finish, whatever happens, you won't be missed.

In the 41st millenium the Imperium of man has spanned the known galaxy for some 10 thousand years. A relic from a bygone age of exploration and conquest the Imperium now teeters on the edge of oblivion. It's golden age cut short by the tumultuous transformation of mankind into a new era of psychic awareness.

Besieged on all sides by aliens of every stripe, from the green-skinned Orcs, to the seemingly Altruistic Tau, and even the psychic dimension itself which warps the fabric of space and time, mankind fights for his survival.

Not completely descriptive I guess, but it gets the point across. Er, maybe this is better as a box-top blurb than a thesis statement... lol.


Oops, I said 41 century... not millenium. Lol. Changed.

yeah, drop the marxist part from Tau.

I would add in the "There is roughly one million world in the Imperium, and the galaxy is not a small place" or something.

And you definitely need the "Humanity is beset on all sides from foul xenos from without and traitors within" Or whatever the quote is. And mention of the emperor is required.

"The god emperor of mankind united humanity 10,000 years ago, and after a cataclysm, a civil war called the horus heresy,he has sat immobile on the life giving systems of the golden throne"


Automatically Appended Next Post:
The galaxy burned peeps died yadda yadda yadda

Thanks for all the suggestions guys! In response to somethings I read:

I used "marxist" to describe tau as a stand in for "the greater good". I wanted to try and get the idea of sacrifice for the betterment of the race across in a shorter phrase, and I wanted to avoid communism. That word is too connotative (at least in this country). If anyone can come up with something better, I'm all ears (or rather eyes in this case).

I don't want to go into too much detail about things, just a super brief overview of the universe as a whole, and some of the races in it. Note the use of the word "some" not "all".

I don't own the BRB, just the AoBR one

So, with some additions, and a little rewording:

In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, there is only war. The Imperium of Man is surrounded on all sides by alien forces. The Emperor’s elite super soldiers, the Space Marines, do battle in his name. The barbaric green skinned Orks wage war for the mere pleasure of fighting, while the ancient Eldar cling to their dying civilization. Few can stand before the numberless Tyranids, as the Marxist Tau push the boundaries of their burgeoning empire. All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. The universe is a big place, and whatever happens, you will not be missed.

Here's my shot at helping you out using what you just recently posted as a skeleton:

It is the 41st millennium. In the grim darkness of the once burning light, there is only war. The Imperium of Man, united by the God-Emperor of Mankind and has existed for the last millennium, is surrounded on all sides by alien forces. The Emperor’s elite super soldiers, the Space Marines, do battle in his name as he sits on the Golden Throne, mortally wounded from the greatest civil war in man's history, The Horus Heresy. The barbaric green skinned Orks wage war for the mere pleasure of fighting, while the ancient Eldar cling to their dying civilization, longing for their glory days that have long passed. Few can stand before the numberless Tyranids, aliens that number beyond the billions to consume all life, including entire planets. The Tau Empire, aliens that believe in a power of unification that knows no racial boundaries, push the boundaries of their burgeoning empire, while being a young race in the galaxy with an exponential rate of technological power. All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world, teasing them with promises of great power and glory, yet corrupting their consciences and turning them into the things they once fought. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. In the vastness of the universe, those that perish are but a thread in the fabric of time.

It would also help to have a slideshow right beyond you as you give the speech, as it can really set the atmosphere of the universe.

"expansionist Tau" might be better, as that is the element that is most threatening to the Empire. even though they are devious grimdark space commies

PraetorDave wrote:Thanks for all the suggestions guys! In response to somethings I read:

I used "marxist" to describe tau as a stand in for "the greater good". I wanted to try and get the idea of sacrifice for the betterment of the race across in a shorter phrase, and I wanted to avoid communism. That word is too connotative (at least in this country). If anyone can come up with something better, I'm all ears (or rather eyes in this case).

I don't want to go into too much detail about things, just a super brief overview of the universe as a whole, and some of the races in it. Note the use of the word "some" not "all".

I don't own the BRB, just the AoBR one

So, with some additions, and a little rewording:

In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, there is only war. The Imperium of Man is surrounded on all sides by alien forces. The Emperor’s elite super soldiers, the Space Marines, do battle in his name. The barbaric green skinned Orks wage war for the mere pleasure of fighting, while the ancient Eldar cling to their dying civilization. Few can stand before the numberless Tyranids, as the Marxist Tau push the boundaries of their burgeoning empire. All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. The universe is a big place, and whatever happens, you will not be missed.

You might change numberless to infinite -- Tyranids. I'm not sure if I like infinite better, but its just a suggestion. You might even say something about them devouring everything in their path for bio-mass, but I don't know how bawls to the walls you want to go with this speech. I did one on Castlevania and the Belmonts history with ole Drac. The class room just stared at me like I was a dumb ass. Marxist rings of humanity, but you're correct. Currently, I can't think of a better way to word the Tau. One other thing, is there anyway to re-word "All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world."? Maybe, "While the Chaos Gods manipulate the mortal lives of Man and Xeno alike." or perhaps, "While the mortal races throw themselves at one another, the Gods of Chaos guide, deceive, and destroy Man and Xeno alike." Not sure, just not too fond of that "All the while," part. Everything else is great, though. [Though, one last thing, you might add "hostile" in front of alien forces. Alright, alright I'm done!]

I hope I am not coming off as an ass. If I am, I apologize. Words and their ilk excite me. Just don't expect my grammar to be good .

AresX8 wrote:Here's my shot at helping you out using what you just recently posted as a skeleton:

It is the 41st millennium. In the grim darkness of the once burning light, there is only war. The Imperium of Man, united by the God-Emperor of Mankind and has existed for the last millennium, is surrounded on all sides by alien forces. The Emperor’s elite super soldiers, the Space Marines, do battle in his name as he sits on the Golden Throne, mortally wounded from the greatest civil war in man's history, The Horus Heresy. The barbaric green skinned Orks wage war for the mere pleasure of fighting, while the ancient Eldar cling to their dying civilization, longing for their glory days that have long passed. Few can stand before the numberless Tyranids, aliens that number beyond the billions to consume all life, including entire planets. The Tau Empire, aliens that believe in a power of unification that knows no racial boundaries, push the boundaries of their burgeoning empire, while being a young race in the galaxy with an exponential rate of technological power. All the while, the Gods of Chaos toy with those in the material world, teasing them with promises of great power and glory, yet corrupting their consciences and turning them into the things they once fought. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. In the vastness of the universe, those that perish are but a thread in the fabric of time.

It would also help to have a slideshow right beyond you as you give the speech, as it can really set the atmosphere of the universe.

While I got goose bumps reading that, I do actually need a skeleton. My speech needs to be 4-6 minutes. This is my INTODUCTION. I.E. I still have my thesis, 3 main points, and conclusion to do. So while I would love to say that, I really don't have the time. But thanks for the help. Plus I'm trying to avoid a deer in head lights situation.

Unfortunately, no visual aids. However, I am going to bring some minis, and pass them out for the class to look at while I speak, so no worries.

I also want to avoid the word "Xeno" as I really don't think it is a word normal, college aged adults know without me explaining it. And the less explaining the better.

Micromegas: Don't worry, no assery here. I'm looking for input, so all help is appreciated and dually noted.

I think I am going to sit on this for the night, and come back to it in the morning. Thanks for the help everyone!

The Imperium of Man, more than a million worlds united by worship of the God Emperor, is beset on all sides. From without, the alien. Be they the brutal Ork, the perfidious Eldar, the expansionist Tau, the soulless Necron, or the all devouring Tyranid. From within, by the witch, the mutant, the traitor, the Heretic. The dread followers of the Gods of Chaos gnaw upon the pillars of righteousness and faith which prop up the Imperium.

Against these foes stand the massed armies of the Imperial Guard, men and women who take up arms to defend the glorious vision of the Emperor of Mankind. Beside them fight the Space Marines, the Emperor's Elite. The mightiest soldiers to ever stride between the stars. They know no fear, for they are fear incarnate. In the shadows, the agents of the Holy Orders of the Inquisition drive back the insidious tendrils of those who would destroy mankind with fire and unshakable faith. It is an age of darkness and war. An age in which the destiny of mankind hangs in the balance. To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold billions. It is to live in the cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable. These are those times. Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be re-learned. Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim darkness of the future there is only war.

I think you would do better to write some original material. What I've read so far is pretty much minor paraphrasing of the intro to the game.

If originality doesn't matter, why bother changing anything?

Hey just wanted to let you guys know how my speech turned out.

I got a 95% on it (my professor was really slow getting my grade to me), and the class really seemed to like it.

Speaking Professor wrote: Very interesting attention getting device! Your introduction was very well developed.

Thanks for all the help with getting this banged out, it really helped me get a good grade. Cheers!