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So here I sit, on the occasion of my 42nd Birthday. I am listening to music way too loud, and looking at all the nearly sincere "OMG! Happy Birthday!" posts on my Facebook wall wondering about the path I have taken. I am an unemployed, bald old man it seems, with many more years ahead (Emperor willing), who has chosen on this day, at this time to look back at my life and play "What if?"

What if I hadn't listened to my father and taken auto shop instead of ceramics? For sure the ashtrays and paper weights would be massively different around the house.

What if I hadn't listened to my father and joined the Army, instead of the reserves? Would I be retiring after 25 years now? Would I still be alive?

I have thousands more (as we all do) and hundreds that start with if I hadn't listened to my father. At the end of it all, I am glad of where I am, proud of where I have been, and excited about the future. I am sure that somewhere in the trousers of time, I did all those things...

That brings me to the question... The only regret I have is starting to smoke at 18, the only thing I would change. How about you Dakka? what would you do different?

I didn't take advanced placement (AP-- college credit) classes in high school-- I wonder how much it'd have helped me through college, and how much less time it'd take to complete college courses?

Of course, I wish I did now, but I don't have a time machine, hehe.

We have the option for that at my high school. From what I can tell, it isn't really worth the time, and although you have a little more presence among the enrollment people or being a smarty pants, you probably don't end up saving that much time on your classes.

Maybe with AP Physics and Calculus, but not with AP Bio and AP Trigonometry. You take those sophomore year, and by the time you get to college, you've probably totally forgotten about that stuff.

At least, all the AP kids I know who've graduated aren't ranting about how much it helped them.

Anyway, onto OP. Man, that's deep gak. I just finished high school, and I'm having something similar going on in my head... Should I have been more outgoing? Should I have been more ballsy with the girls? Should I have applied myself a little bit more? If I hadn't had said that, would we still be friends? Etc etc.

Just be true to yourself, and life will be good. The past is past, and there's nothing you can do but learn from it and keep improving yourself. 42 is a ripe young age. You've got plenty of time. When you're seventy, then you should start worrying, but not yet

I often have moments of what if, but then I try and remind myself that we are all just an amalgamation of all the little things that happened to us, and to change even a single one might result in a massive change to who we are, how we feel and what we do. I've made some massive mistakes over the years, but I'm relatively happy with the person I am these days and wouldn't want to be anyone else.

Still, about 5 years back, I was forced to sell a really nice guitar to pay rent, never been in a position to replace it like for like, so that I would like to change if I could go back.

There are some things I'd do differently in my life for sure. There came the point in my life where I was having more want to do overs than glad I did that moments.
I did some serious soul searching and began adjusting my actions, if not my attitude.
Over time, my attitude started changing to fit my new choices in life, and as I look at the years since, I wouldn't change much of anything and feel like I'm now in the process of going from strength to strength.

I would have started working on my persuasive speech in English X earlier, instead of waiting until the night before I had to present it.

I would have nurtured my artistic side more, for the sake of being better at design. I'm a front-end web developer with a decent sense of design, but I can't help but wonder if I'd be happier doing more design instead of development(although tbh, I'd rather implement an interface than have someone else do it).

Also, I should have gotten this stubbed toe checked out earlier instead of waiting so long...

Lastly, I should have just asked an admin to change my DakkaDakka username instead of creating a new user. The justification in my head was "whatever, post count is just a number" :p

I fethed up a relationship I had with an awesome girl because I wanted to get my PhD. I would do that differently.

I have spent the last 4 years in front of a computer, staring at data tables. I would do that differently.

I once owned a guinea pig. I will never forgive myself for this.

If I would have stayed in the army, I'd be at least an E6, and ten years toward retirement. I wonder if I should have stayed in sometimes.

What would i do?
Maybe ignore all the HS pressure and do what i wanted.
And if we have hindsight, I would have realised just how little HS matters.

Taken different courses in college...
Though i'd still do a third year...
I wouldn't like to miss out on this year at all...

I would've taken Law, English Language and English Literature at college isntead of Law, Philosophy, Politics and Combined English.

Apart from that, there aren't many things I can say about my life that are my own fault; the vast majority of my life has been plagued by depression caused by nasty, vindictive human beings that don't deserve the honour of being called 'humans', and thus a lot of decisions made were done because I had no other choice, or the only other choice was to further endanger my own sanity (or what remains of it).

When I die, a lot of people are getting haunted.

Avatar 720 wrote:I would've taken Law, English Language and English Literature at college isntead of Law, Philosophy, Politics and Combined English.

Apart from that, there aren't many things I can say about my life that are my own fault; the vast majority of my life has been plagued by depression caused by nasty, vindictive human beings that don't deserve the honour of being called 'humans', and thus a lot of decisions made were done because I had no other choice, or the only other choice was to further endanger my own sanity (or what remains of it).

When I die, a lot of people are getting haunted.

Depression sucks. After 20 odd (and I do mean ODD) years of suffering from it I finally got help last year. It has proved to be the difference between existing and truly living.

There's not much I'd change to be honest.
The only advice I'd give to the 16 year old me is to avoid credit cards.

I'm in an extremely comfortable place at the moment, with a nice home and a decent job and a lovely Wife.
Life is good.

I would have tried harder with the one who got away. OK, that's a lie sort of. I would have tried, period. It's probably my greatest regret that I kind of placidly accepted friendzoning. It's been 10 years since I moved away and still bothers me all the time. I wish I had had the courage to speak up back then.

I also would have tried a little harder to get along with my dad; had I known he would die so unexpectedly. That comes in second though - not because I'm selfish per se (although I am) but rather because, well, my previous years tell me that wouldn't have worked anyway.

Not really. We're animals following animal instincts. You wouldn't ask "why blue" or "what's 4".
Que sara.

I truly can't think of anything I'd go back in change that would impact my current life. I learned a lot, had a lot of great experiences, and work my ass off to get to where I am today.

I still have another two years before I'm fully qualified, so still much work to do and my life can change in an instant if I fail any part of my training between here and the finish line.

So far, no regrets, but I'm still young. I have a lot to look forward to, and we'll see how my current course of action plays out. Hopefully I'll post here again 30 years from now, having recently retired after 35 years of great service.

Nothing, because if I went back and changed anything I risk not having the life I have now.

Cheers

Andrew

Great idea for a thread.
/salute

Similar to Dogmas, fething up a relationship over end of college days.

She was.....special.

I wish I could go back for just 5 minutes with her. Just 5.

In high school I wish I had done less stupid things, been more outgoing and intoxicated.

I got alienated from Philosophy in my first university enrollment. I left school for 4 years before coming back to it (and Law). There was issues with school, but mostly I needed to become independant from my family. So I ran away and sent them a postcard a month later.

I like the path I've taken, and it isn't as hard to return to school as other's have told me before (especially since I was convinced this was where I belonged), but still, can't stop wondering what it would have been if instead of running away from my home for 4 years, I had just taken up a room next to my Uni and waited until I steamed down...

Oh and Happy B-day OP!

Kovnik Obama wrote:I got alienated from Philosophy in my first university enrollment. I left school for 4 years before coming back to it (and Law). There was issues with school, but mostly I needed to become independant from my family. So I ran away and sent them a postcard a month later.

I like the path I've taken, and it isn't as hard to return to school as other's have told me before (especially since I was convinced this was where I belonged), but still, can't stop wondering what it would have been if instead of running away from my home for 4 years, I had just taken up a room next to my Uni and waited until I steamed down...

Oh and Happy B-day OP!

Thank you sir.

I think this is appropriate both for the thread and myself. The Chairman said it best.

Frazzled wrote:I think this is appropriate both for the thread and myself. The Chairman said it best.

This is a bit more my speed. Closer to my generation anyway