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Hello everyone! Today I will don the CEO Suit for GW (fictionally, of course ) and show you my experience in fixing the GW name! Watch in amazement as I go through the GW HQ and fix everyones complaints, and attempt to make more money AND make the shareholders stick around! Great!

::puts on suit:: Well this is nice, lets see, lets start off in the office here. We need more money, so the first thing I will do is.... AHA! I've got it, I NEED TO SELL MY STUFF AT HOBBY LOBBY AND MICHAELS!! Imagine that, getting my hobby niche market into a widely known US hobby chain store, how brilliant! I really don't care about the GW stores, and since the CEO before me was all more cutting it BONE FRICKIN DRY with payroll and OVER THE TOP SALES PUSHINESS, maybe I should repeal my predecessors ban on INTERNET SALES, because really, everybody LOL'ed in the office when I asked them how they felt about it. Yes it was pretty goofy and a blatent "yeah our prices are crazy high"

Next? Oh prices? Sure lets tackle that. Since our profit margins ARE PUSHED TO THE MAX with using cheap materials, and charging prices that don't just sticker shock, but instead sticker shock, stab, and smack you, we should really drop it a little (THE GROANS OF ALL SHAREHOLDERS ARE HEARD DOWN THE HALL) Don't worry, I'll talk to the chairman.... I'll let him know that SHORT TERM GAIN does not set up LONG TERM BUSINESS... hold on, a memo just hit the desk.... it reads:

New CEO, you lowered the prices on our stuff. Our profit margins just dropped below 5000%. The shareholders are VERY concerned. P.S. We need more new players ASAP

New players? Oh of course, that is definitely thinking about the long term. Since I dropped the prices, I can actually try to get those teenage kids to play. Veterans are clogging up the stores? Oh, I've got it, KICK THEM ALL OUT, STUPID VETERANS. Sure loyalty is great, but we need shoppers, not players. Lets start over, we squatted before, but never the real thing! I LOVE IT!

Alright, time to leave the office and check out the building ::walks to closest office:: Oh hi Matt Ward. You're fired. "What?!" Yeah Matt, you gotta go. That fluff and codex writing you do is so obviously "lets make it worth buying" that I get really sick of the BLATANTLY OBVIOUS ATTEMPTING TO SELL MORE TACTIC and makes us all look really stupid.

Alright, thats done, whats next? ::walks into R&D:: Oh yeah look (guy at a dark desk trying to make new SoB. They really WERE working on them! Lets see how its coming. "Hi, are you making new SoB models?" The poor guy looks back from his desk, his face in tears, his face heavily scarred... "Y-Yes, I am..."

Oh? How is it coming along?

He cowers in fear, and says, "Please no more? The robes..... THE ROOOOOOBES!!!!!!"

I close the door.... how strange.... lets move on. Oh A door labeled WHFB, lets see here :pens it:: Oh nevermind just a janitor closet. Well whats next, oh I have a new email on my CEO iPad, lets see its says:

GAMES WORKSHOP COMPETITION ANALYSIS: GW 100% MARKET SHARE, NO OTHER COMPANIES TO REPORT

Wait a second..... oh well Ill deal with that later I guess.

Lets keep up the tour: Oh look, its the finecast factory door, lets go inside :pens door:: (sees a bunch of mold and injection machines) Whats this...? its Jokaero orange looking... what? Apes? Good lord its run by trained orangutans!! Well I kind of saw that coming. Gonna have to find replacements for them, what do you mean EVERYONE ELSE GETS PAID MINIMUM WAGE? No wonder...

I hope there arent too many other doors like this one, yikes. Ah here we are: UPCOMING CHANGES FOR ORKS AND TYRANIDS.... must be an idea room.... :pens door:: Empty? Remind me to get someone on that then.

Not sure I like being the CEO here, might have to qui- DIVIDENDS PAID! RECORD QUARTER?! Wait a bloomin minute, alright Ill keep doing it, SURE! NO WAIT! I have morals! I have principals! I QUIT!!!

Alright DAKKADAKKA posters, I pass on the job to you! You be the CEO, walk your building and make the changes necessary for GLORY!

FOR THE MONE-------err--------EMPRAH!



(This was pure satire, don't take it serious!)

Dude, sorry, but this, while you've obviously taken some effort to entertain, is a duplicate thread from one that wound up a week or two ago, which in turn was one from a week or two prior to that.

While I get where you're going, I've said all I have to say on the matter, and...

Ahm ooot.

 azreal13 wrote:
Dude, sorry, but this, while you've obviously taken some effort to entertain, is a duplicate thread from one that wound up a week or two ago, which in turn was one from a week or two prior to that.

While I get where you're going, I've said all I have to say on the matter, and...

Ahm ooot.

Not to be rude, but the name AZREAL means you can never be the CEO, as you will always be the right hand man, the fist of vengeance!

I ACCEPT YOUR OFFER TO SERVE! MAY THE SANGUINE BLOOD OF THE EMPRAH FLOW WITHIN YOU

Dibs on Royal Jellyfish


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Just realized my rank is Man O War. This is humorous.

I'm the new CEO? cool! carry on as you are GW make sure any surplus is paid as dividends also get a loan to ensure extra super dividend payments. Who would have thought Army Mans shares would actually do something useful (like pay for my retirement).

 Mr. Burning wrote:
I'm the new CEO? cool! carry on as you are GW make sure any surplus is paid as dividends also get a loan to ensure extra super dividend payments. Who would have thought Army Mans shares would actually do something useful (like pay for my retirement).

pretty much how I would run things, to hell with the gaming community as long as I get paid

I'd cut my family a decent size check and walk out the door. The company is set up to please investors for now, not the buyers. It can't stay that way forever but no ceo can change that until the bottom starts falling out from under them.

It is obvious that the OP is not qualified for CEO. There is no way that Hobby Lobby, owned by Fundamentalist Christians, would stock products that feature Demons, Vampires, and anything associated with "Evil".

It is also the prime duty of the CEO to maximize shareholder profit, while getting the largest bonus/golden parachute possible. It is not their duty to care about customer wants and needs when you have the majority of market share. If enough customers do switch to another game system, they are just bought up and closed, or folded into GW offerings if sales look like they can be sustained. If a customer doesn't like it, they can go somewhere else. That is the reality, so why mess it up with wishing for something that will not occur. *sighs*

Didn't we just do this a month or so ago?

A CEO has little to no control over the basic operations of a company. Prices, production, etc are taken care of by local management, not the Board of Supervisors.

I'd drop the hobbit and hire someone who are can has the proof read codices before they are released.

 gossipmeng wrote:
I'd drop the hobbit and hire someone who are can has the proof read codices before they are released.

Again, not the job of a CEO.

 SoloFalcon1138 wrote:
Didn't we just do this a month or so ago?

A CEO has little to no control over the basic operations of a company. Prices, production, etc are taken care of by local management, not the Board of Supervisors.

This just isn't the case. GW isn't some huge company where the leadership can't even impact the business because everything is so entrenched. They're smaller in terms of yearly revenue than a Super Walmart location. One.

Kirby owns a large stake in the company and is currently filling two positions on the board. He has huge influence. Probably the only source of influence in the whole place.

And the verdict is: fill my pockets with money. Kirby is doing what's right for Kirby and if I was in his place, I'd do the same thing.

Hookers! And blackjack!

 Lansirill wrote:
Hookers! And blackjack!

Finally! something that CEOs actually do! lol

Don't we have the Annual Report thread for this kind of thing?

http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/543013.page

 pretre wrote:
Don't we have the Annual Report thread for this kind of thing?

http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/543013.page

I know of no other hobby where people concern themselves with the company's annual report. Do Star Wars fans check up on Disney stock prices? What is the point of us knowing their money breakdown?

 SoloFalcon1138 wrote:

 pretre wrote:
Don't we have the Annual Report thread for this kind of thing?

http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/543013.page

I know of no other hobby where people concern themselves with the company's annual report. Do Star Wars fans check up on Disney stock prices? What is the point of us knowing their money breakdown?

http://paizo.com/threads/rzs2ij6u?From-Hasbros-2007-Annual-Report
http://forums.mtgsalvation.com/showthread.php?t=356445

Either way, I think that this thread is duplicative.

again,what do we care about their financial state unless we were shareholders ourselves? it seems like the GW haters want anything to find to show it's a failure. Any hardcore Flames of War players care about how well GF9 does?

 SoloFalcon1138 wrote:
again,what do we care about their financial state unless we were shareholders ourselves? it seems like the GW haters want anything to find to show it's a failure. Any hardcore Flames of War players care about how well GF9 does?

That's a great question for the other thread.

You people have no vision, If i was Ceo I'd sell all character minis in halves, now that's how you gouge.

Bullockist wrote:
You people have no vision, If i was Ceo I'd sell all character minis in halves, now that's how you gouge.

While I get it, this is also not a function of a CEO.

 SoloFalcon1138 wrote:
again,what do we care about their financial state unless we were shareholders ourselves? it seems like the GW haters want anything to find to show it's a failure. Any hardcore Flames of War players care about how well GF9 does?

Some people here are shareholders in GW. And just because you can't grasp why someone else enjoys something doesn't mean they require your approval to continue their enjoyment. I'm sorry that you just don't get it. Why don't you go find a thread that you do enjoy?

As CEO I will bring back specialist games, whilst dropping Fantasy and 40k.

I'd raise prices and slim expenses, more one man stores, no advertising, that sort of thing. Might even get rid of staff altogether and just have those self service tills you see in the supermarket. Then I'd replace Finecast with an even cheaper poorer quality material, it's ok our loyal fans will buy anything. I can do this because I'd stop people buying from any other company by suing everyone else in the industry as I own '28mm' and 'miniature'.

 SoloFalcon1138 wrote:

Bullockist wrote:
You people have no vision, If i was Ceo I'd sell all character minis in halves, now that's how you gouge.

While I get it, this is also not a function of a CEO.

I thought the CEO set the vision for the company and made sure that the company moved towards that vision.

My vision would be simple. I would change the mission statement of the company.

Now: "We make the best toy soldiers in the world"

Mine: "We make the best toy soldier games and accessories in the world"

Is that what the CEO does.

Dolgan wrote:
It is also the prime duty of the CEO to maximize shareholder profit, while getting the largest bonus/golden parachute possible. It is not their duty to care about customer wants and needs when you have the majority of market share. If enough customers do switch to another game system, they are just bought up and closed, or folded into GW offerings if sales look like they can be sustained. If a customer doesn't like it, they can go somewhere else. That is the reality, so why mess it up with wishing for something that will not occur. *sighs*

I realise your post was somewhat tongue-in-cheek, but I'd just like to drop this here from the Companies Act 2006

S172 to promote the success of the company - directors must continue to act in a way that benefits the shareholders as a whole, but there is now an additional list of non-exhaustive factors to which the directors must have regard. These factors are:
1.the long term consequences of decisions
2.the interests of employees
3.the need to foster the company's business relationships with suppliers, customers and others
4.the impact on the community and the environment
5.the desire to maintain a reputation for high standards of business conduct
6.the need to act fairly as between members

Italics for emphasis.

A general direction and vision for the company as CEO for myself would be:

- An emphasis on great looking, affordable, and easy to purchase miniatures.

- An excellent gateway into the hobby of tabletop gaming for new younger players

- Consistent support for veteran players and consumers of the product and brand

-A strong reputation as a supportive and understanding brand

I would hire a proper team for public relations to focus on attending non-GW conventions and events for advertising and presence(imagine how to play booths at Gen con). I would also discuss how pricing could effect our vision with an attempt to overhaul the management in that department, with a focus of friendly and reasonable compromise with FLGS. An improved access to GW stock with a minor price increase on retailers(to lower the 20% off shops that compete with GW).

@ Baragash

Only partially tongue in cheek. Know that GW is a British Company, so the law you posted would apply.[ have very little knowledge of laws outside the US]

My post is the reality of how many US Multinationals, and large corporations, operate. To quote Verizon Executive Bryan Mitchell, "If a customer does not like our quality of service they can leave." That attitude pervades US Corporate Culture, and is why I left for Public Sector work.

 dreamakuma wrote:
A general direction and vision for the company as CEO for myself would be:

- An emphasis on great looking, affordable, and easy to purchase miniatures.

- An excellent gateway into the hobby of tabletop gaming for new younger players

- Consistent support for veteran players and consumers of the product and brand

-A strong reputation as a supportive and understanding brand

But but but GW do this already.

You're doing a good job dude. Now make a mega-dreadnought miniature.