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So recently my dad died. Now I have alwayshated my sister, My dad gave her everything while me few(Gave her the car I wanted, always talked to his co-workers about her and not me to name a few) despite me doing everything for him calling, getting him stuff. When we cleaned the house, he had more stuff of my sister(Pics, albums) and took her on vacations and not me. Now part of that was my dad was really the only good parent she had, so she got coddled, and she lived with him and I never lived with him. But today I was called to get his stuff from work. Y'know knick knacks. I open the box in my car. I find nothing of me. I have several pics of my sister, but none of me. Presents she gave him. but nothing from me. I also got a CD of all his piture off his Comp at work. Spent the last half and hour looking through 500 or so pics...15-20 of me. The rest are my sister or my car. Now Im pissed. I was the good child but he never once acknowledged this.
So dakka, Should I be pissed at this, or let it go.

Let it go, nothing can be done about it but resentment and unneeded pain since its all in the past.

Nothing good ever come from being bitter.

Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

I did cry, A month ago when this happened. It is just so aggravating to see that i did so much, when my sister did so little, and he put her on a pedastal

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Did you read anything he wrote? I'm thinking no.

@Sauce --> resentment never gets you anywhere, and it only adds as an extra weight on you. And I realize youve not told us everything, but holding on to that resentment for your sister because she was favored isn't going to make you happier or more fulfilled. If your dad favoring her is the primary reason for your resentment, realize that wasn't her fault, but rather on your late father, and let that go. I'm not saying you need to reconcile with her, but I promise the minute you let go of that anger, you'll feel 20 pounds lighter.

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Did you read anything he wrote? I'm thinking no.

@Sauce --> resentment never gets you anywhere, and it only adds as an extra weight on you. And I realize youve not told us everything, but holding on to that resentment for your sister because she was favored isn't going to make you happier or more fulfilled. If your dad favoring her is the primary reason for your resentment, realize that wasn't her fault, but rather on your late father, and let that go. I'm not saying you need to reconcile with her, but I promise the minute you let go of that anger, you'll feel 20 pounds lighter.

I was going to, but I found the hilarious amount of spelling and grammatical mistakes sickening. So I commented anyways. Welcome to Dakka

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Wow. First you put the guy down for posting personal stuff on a "site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community", then you tell him he's pitiful for not "mourning right". Way to fulfill your own prophecy...

~Tim?


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Did you read anything he wrote? I'm thinking no.

@Sauce --> resentment never gets you anywhere, and it only adds as an extra weight on you. And I realize youve not told us everything, but holding on to that resentment for your sister because she was favored isn't going to make you happier or more fulfilled. If your dad favoring her is the primary reason for your resentment, realize that wasn't her fault, but rather on your late father, and let that go. I'm not saying you need to reconcile with her, but I promise the minute you let go of that anger, you'll feel 20 pounds lighter.

I was going to, but I found the hilarious amount of spelling and grammatical mistakes sickening. So I commented anyways. Welcome to Dakka

And this? Dude, he's friggin' dyslexic. Give him a break.

~Tim?

 Some_Call_Me_Tim? wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Wow. First you put the guy down for posting personal stuff on a "site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community", then you tell him he's pitiful for not mourning right. Way to fulfill your own prophecy...

~Tim?


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Did you read anything he wrote? I'm thinking no.

@Sauce --> resentment never gets you anywhere, and it only adds as an extra weight on you. And I realize youve not told us everything, but holding on to that resentment for your sister because she was favored isn't going to make you happier or more fulfilled. If your dad favoring her is the primary reason for your resentment, realize that wasn't her fault, but rather on your late father, and let that go. I'm not saying you need to reconcile with her, but I promise the minute you let go of that anger, you'll feel 20 pounds lighter.

I was going to, but I found the hilarious amount of spelling and grammatical mistakes sickening. So I commented anyways. Welcome to Dakka

And this? Dude, he's friggin' dyslexic. Give him a break.

~Tim?

Well yeah, the site has horrible reviews, and the other 40k communities (Heresy, Bolter and Chainsword) are notable for having far better reviews, and objectively less bitching. Only problem is I'm already at home here.
Fulfill my own prophecy? I still gave the post credence. I just mentioned it might not be the best idea. Yes this is an understatement.

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

Well yeah, the site has horrible reviews, and the other 40k communities (Heresy, Bolter and Chainsword) are notable for having far better reviews, and objectively less bitching. Only problem is I'm already at home here.
Fulfill my own prophecy? I still gave the post credence. I just mentioned it might not be the best idea. Yes this is an understatement.

No. You were an donkey-cave that insensitively tried to tell someone the "right" way to mourn while all the while not responding to any of his actual questions. Then you insulted his grammar. I don't give out the yellow triangle of friendship often, but congrats, you got it.

If the other forums have better reviews (I don't even know what this means) and are so much better, well by all means go there. With your attitude you'll hardly be welcomed here

EDIT - just realized you're the kid that offered up some of the worst custom rules in the world on the forum, asked for criticism, and then treated everyone like garbage when they tried to offer it. So I guess this response is par for the course for you.

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Did you read anything he wrote? I'm thinking no.

@Sauce --> resentment never gets you anywhere, and it only adds as an extra weight on you. And I realize youve not told us everything, but holding on to that resentment for your sister because she was favored isn't going to make you happier or more fulfilled. If your dad favoring her is the primary reason for your resentment, realize that wasn't her fault, but rather on your late father, and let that go. I'm not saying you need to reconcile with her, but I promise the minute you let go of that anger, you'll feel 20 pounds lighter.

The thing is my sister knows it and holds it against me, Making sure the money he was supposed to give to me goes to her so she can pay for her horrible mistakes. She even flat out said she is better then me.

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

Well yeah, the site has horrible reviews, and the other 40k communities (Heresy, Bolter and Chainsword) are notable for having far better reviews, and objectively less bitching. Only problem is I'm already at home here.
Fulfill my own prophecy? I still gave the post credence. I just mentioned it might not be the best idea. Yes this is an understatement.

No. You were an donkey-cave that insensitively tried to tell someone the "right" way to mourn while all the while not responding to any of his actual questions. Then you insulted his grammar. I don't give out the yellow triangle of friendship often, but congrats, you got it.

If the other forums have better reviews (I don't even know what this means) and are so much better, well by all means go there. With your attitude you'll hardly be welcomed here

I never said that was the right way to mourn. In case you didn't notice (you don't appear to understand what "self fulfilling" means) I was purposefully over exaggerating. From the title I thought it was a question of simply not being affected at all, or shedding a single tear.
It is self fulfilling because I said he shouldn't post things of that nature here, and then replied to the topic anyway.
Yeah I was an donkey-cave wasn't I. At least I was upfront and looking him in the eye.
You just were far more of an ass to me for the above reasons.
Be welcomed? I ran out my welcome like everyone else here a while ago. Everyone here is an enemy to someone. I couldn't think of a more antagonizing post, with what was a mistake with a misleading title, all things considered. Way to go bud
Kid? Yeah, this is what I mean. Most Apoc units were hilariously more powerful than my gak for the points.

Daddy and princess dynamics are common, they're a frequent occurrence and most people can give personal accounts from their own families or people they know. My dad and sis are the same. You say anything to her that resembles criticism, he jumps to her defense. Anyone else in the house? Not his problem. She's unemployed, soaks up money from him constantly, and does nothing but watch TV and accrue pounds. She brings legal trouble around with her big mouth and almost split my family up one year. She's 26 years old and doesn't even have a job, it really is disgusting, but for whatever reason, she's his jewel.

Take solace in the concept that perhaps the reason parents behave this way toward a particular child is because they recognize the weakness and inferiority within them, or that their peers around them are harsh critics toward them as well, so they provide extra protection and attention that they feel they need. Chin up my man.

I don't think you understand...When I said you were fulfilling your own prophecy, I was referring to the way you first said that the Dakka community was bad/hostile, and then replied to the question with a rude, foul-mouthed, angry response.

Also, to answer the OP's question: some problems are simply worth letting go. Whether or not yours is one of these problems is something only you can know. All I'll say is that bitterness will gain you nothing and risks losing you much.

~Tim?

Maybe he left Most of it to her because he knew that she was going to keep screwing up and you wouldn't. While this might not be the case it is something to think about. Other than that its probably best you let it go and Carry On (if you are offended by the final remark I apologize)

 Some_Call_Me_Tim? wrote:
I don't think you understand...When I said you were fulfilling your own prophecy, I was referring to the way you first said that the Dakka community was bad/hostile, and then replied to the question with a rude, foul-mouthed, angry response.

~Tim?

When in Rome, do as the Romans.
Either way is self fulfilling.

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

I never said that was the right way to mourn. In case you didn't notice (you don't appear to understand what "self fulfilling" means) I was purposefully over exaggerating. From the title I thought it was a question of simply not being affected at all, or shedding a single tear.
It is self fulfilling because I said he shouldn't post things of that nature here, and then replied to the topic anyway.
Yeah I was an donkey-cave wasn't I. At least I was upfront and looking him in the eye.
You just were far more of an ass to me for the above reasons.
Be welcomed? I ran out my welcome like everyone else here a while ago. Everyone here is an enemy to someone. I couldn't think of a more antagonizing post, with what was a mistake with a misleading title, all things considered. Way to go bud

Go troll elsewhere. It was meant to be antagonistic because you're being an intentionally unhelpful jerk.

There's nothing self fulfilling about posting that here, because not everyone that responded to his post has been an donkey-cave like you. In fact, you've been the only one. And who are you to say that this place isn't the right place for him to ask for advice? This is clearly a venue he feels comfortable speaking, with people whom he feels comfortable confiding in.

To simplify it to the most basic statements of human decency. "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." That's especially easy on an Internet forum where you can simply click away.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

When in Rome, do as the Romans.
Either way is self fulfilling.

Again, you're the only person here being an ass, so your attempt at cleverness here doesn't even make sense.

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

I never said that was the right way to mourn. In case you didn't notice (you don't appear to understand what "self fulfilling" means) I was purposefully over exaggerating. From the title I thought it was a question of simply not being affected at all, or shedding a single tear.
It is self fulfilling because I said he shouldn't post things of that nature here, and then replied to the topic anyway.
Yeah I was an donkey-cave wasn't I. At least I was upfront and looking him in the eye.
You just were far more of an ass to me for the above reasons.
Be welcomed? I ran out my welcome like everyone else here a while ago. Everyone here is an enemy to someone. I couldn't think of a more antagonizing post, with what was a mistake with a misleading title, all things considered. Way to go bud

Go troll elsewhere. It was meant to be antagonistic because you're being an intentionally unhelpful jerk.

There's nothing self fulfilling about posting that here, because not everyone that responded to his post has been an donkey-cave like you. In fact, you've been the only one. And who are you to say that this place isn't the right place for him to ask for advice? This is clearly a venue he feels comfortable speaking, with people whom he feels comfortable confiding in.

To simplify it to the most basic statements of human decency. "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." That's especially easy on an Internet forum where you can simply click away.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:

When in Rome, do as the Romans.
Either way is self fulfilling.

Again, you're the only person here being an ass, so your attempt at cleverness here doesn't even make sense.

You're sure being an ass to me huh bud.
None of this changes the fact you were more of an ass than me. Which is one hell of an ass. Sir Mix a lot is having a heart attack just considering it.

 Ninjacommando wrote:
Maybe he left Most of it to her because he knew that she was going to keep screwing up and you wouldn't. While this might not be the case it is something to think about. Other than that its probably best you let it go and Carry On (if you are offended by the final remark I apologize)

The reason I think it is. It is because that is the only child he got to raise. The other two where raised by different families, Me by my mom, my brother by his. This is the only kid he got a say in raising. But I do think about how he gave her the crap car with 10 miles to a gallon freeway and me the car in perfect condition. Really my sister has no one to turn to if things go bad TBH other then him

Just say "Fcuk it" and move on

Can we all just ignore TheSaintofKillers? He's obviously just interested in getting as many comments as possible, so the only way to beat 'im is to pretend he isn't there. Let's get back to the original purpose of this thread: trying to give our best advice to someone that sincerely and openly asked for it.

~Tim?

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

 cincydooley wrote:

 TheSaintofKilllers wrote:
Yeah.....
Why are you posting something so personal on a Wargaming site with a rumored/ objectively bad/mixed community?
Not only that but he's your dad man. Hell yeah you should be sad. You should be bawling your fething eyes out. If you don't that's pitiful. What first world society does, damn. The man raised you for 18 years. That's all that should be needed for him to garner your undying love.

Did you read anything he wrote? I'm thinking no.

@Sauce --> resentment never gets you anywhere, and it only adds as an extra weight on you. And I realize youve not told us everything, but holding on to that resentment for your sister because she was favored isn't going to make you happier or more fulfilled. If your dad favoring her is the primary reason for your resentment, realize that wasn't her fault, but rather on your late father, and let that go. I'm not saying you need to reconcile with her, but I promise the minute you let go of that anger, you'll feel 20 pounds lighter.

The thing is my sister knows it and holds it against me, Making sure the money he was supposed to give to me goes to her so she can pay for her horrible mistakes. She even flat out said she is better then me.

Then ditch her and move on. Greet her on holidays, remain civil, but cut your losses. Resentment will only make you sick in the end. It is better to forgive him, and live your life to the fullest without being dragged down by hate. For your sister, she sounds like a spoiled screw-up. So just let her sink on her on, it is bound to happen.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

 Ninjacommando wrote:
Maybe he left Most of it to her because he knew that she was going to keep screwing up and you wouldn't. While this might not be the case it is something to think about. Other than that its probably best you let it go and Carry On (if you are offended by the final remark I apologize)

The reason I think it is. It is because that is the only child he got to raise. The other two where raised by different families, Me by my mom, my brother by his. This is the only kid he got a say in raising. But I do think about how he gave her the crap car with 10 miles to a gallon freeway and me the car in perfect condition. Really my sister has no one to turn to if things go bad TBH other then him

There you go. Remember the good things. Those are the first steps in healing. Now just form a selective memory when it comes to your father and selectively only pick out the favorable stuff.

Well we've had a variety of rules violations here so I think it's best to lock with the reminder that Dakka is not the best format to discuss personal matters.