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 Pyroalchi wrote:
I'm sure it will. Also I think the Orky way is "the winner is the guy having the most fun and the treasure are the friends we made along the way"

that was beautiful

Ok on with the roll for the round. It’s 3!

Pedestrian precinct- stupid orks and grots are littering up the racetrack with their markets and their general pedestrian obstructions. Don't they know there's a race on?

“Oi!” SkagNet groaned, “Dat git jumped da gun !” He aimed his slugga squarely into the dust cloud already kicked up by Busta’s hasty advance. That was it, the starting pistol had fired. SkagNet felt a bit unsatisfied at his somewhat unceremonious methods but the other racers were already taring off the starting line.

It was only then that SkagNet really thought about what was up ahead in that direction. The bar strip, all the rival ork watering holes, Da Rusty Barrel, 'Ard Rokk Kaffe, Da Mekboyz Mess… Come to fink if it… GrodMek’s mekworx would be bunking off for a pint soon. The assembled lootaz and spannerz of one of the biggest mekworx in town would all pour out the gate and onto the strip right about…

A great steam whistle blew in the distance. SkagNet grinned a little evilly as his one good eye caught the glint of the orange sun flickering over the great gates of the mekworx as they swung open disgorging their thirsty load onto the street. The racers were heading right for them.

“Oi, Smirking! Bring up da wagon!” He barked. I gotta see dis.”

[My recommendation would be that the race ends before a winner is declared when some unforeseen enemy attacks us all.]

Racer is Busta, of the Evil Sunz. He is driving an old school Wartrakk (Picture the 3rd edition model or Gorkamorka).

Amazingly the slugga shell impacts right into the tread of the Wartrakk just as Busta started to hit the thrustas. This caused the vehicle to swerve into the dust and spin out. While Busta was spinning of course he was also careening into a host of grots and yoofs that had gotten in the way

Busta raised a fist as several of the other racers sped out ahead of him. "OI THAT'S CHEATING. YAH CAN'T JUST DAKKA AN ORK FROM BEHIND!"

Busta then peeled out and hit the thrustas to try and get back in the race. A few seconds later he forgot what he said about cheating and started firing his slugga with one hand at whatever vehicle happened to be ahead of him.

"Uhmm... Boss... Da seems to be som'at of a crowd up front...?" Balthasar shouted down the speaker tube connecting his high seat on top of the Trike with Toothgrapplers driving seat. A first bumby jump as the vehicle drove over something elastic underlined his warning nicely. Yet the Weirdboy, sitting so deep in his seat with the big long gooseneck handlebars in front of him, he could barely make out what was in front of him, and it didn't really matter anyway, as long as it went forwards. "How unfortunate for Dem. Do us da honour and sound da horn, to make way for us." "We don't have a horn yet, Boss!" "Well... then make some noise, tally ho" The Grot rolled his eyes, shrugged and got a grip on the big burna that was hanging on a pintle near his seat, swinging it around towards what counted as forward on the construct. With a loud roar, the burna sputtled to live, sending a bellowing cloud of burning ... stuff high into the air and to both sides of the speeding vehicle. The green flames definitly announced their presence loudly and all the Grots and Boyz in front of them tried their best to get out of the way - with more or less success.

Not the fastest vehicle, Toothgrappler starts to lack behind a bit and should be overtaken by the others soon, but he definitly has fun so far.

For more orky fun check out my new game on these forums! https://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/812653.page

The other racers blew off the line leaving Fungis and his new racing crew sitting revving the engine in a cloud of dust.
"Fasta, Fasta, GO GO GO!" shouted the eager burna sitting shotgun while pounding Fungis on the arm.
Fungis dropped it into gear and the Snazzwagon's tires spun up their own cloud of dust before gaining traction and rocketing the vehicle forwards. "Yeah, dat's da stuff!" shouted the burna boy as their heads were flung back against the headrests.
Grimgob was holding onto the handles of the Mek's Speshul kannon up top with all he had to keep from being tossed off the back.
Unfortunately, they didn't make it far for as soon as the dust cloud ahead of them broke, Fungis had to slam on the brakes behind the other racers. It was a bloody traffic jam. Who were all these gitz milling about on the course? Didn't they know there was a race on?
Fungis banged on the roof to signal Grimgob to make himself useful. Grimgob fired a salvo of shots into the air which had the disappointing effect of making the assembled mob intrigued rather than disbursing.
The burna started mumbling something to himself while rummaging about in the bin of bottles at his feet. He popped back up with a bottle bearing a strange smelling rag out the top, and pulling a striker from his belt, lit the rag while grinning and chuckling to himself like an idiot. He watched it burn for a hot second, then stuck his torso out the window and tossed it across the hood directly into the crowd to the front and left of the vehicle.
Two or three orks burst into flames and Fungis wondered how he managed to end up with the most deranged ork on Armageddon in his ride. However, this finally had the desired effect, as Grimgob was pounding back on the roof hollering about how there was a pathway now opening up ahead just a little to the left.

Nice one GG.

I’m not ignoring you I was just trying to write up the next bit. But nothing yet.

D20 Roll for this next round is 15 - Drag race! Time for some flat out speed!

Smirking squeegeed the blood from the windscreen and clambered back up on top as SkagNet’s wagon weaved through the crowded street. A great dust cloud had risen and more than one unfortunate ork had fallen victim to the combination of the poor visibility and SkagNet’s woeful driving skills.

Something noisy was blazing a bright green beacon of flame ahead of him in the dust and SkagNet instinctively followed it through the melee. When all of a sudden with a great whoosh something burst into flame right beside him. There came yells and the screeching of tyres as a boomdakka snazzwagon pulled out in front of him and tore off through the crowd.

SkagNet followed behind eying the tail gunner warily.

Soon the dust and the angry injured orkish yells fell away behind them and the racers emerged out onto the main strip that once had been a runway of one of Armageddon’s major space ports. The other racers were already pulling away and taring up the road leaving SkagNets lumbering brew wagon in their dust.

He was going to have to really floor-it to keep up with the action.