Cosplay or Death! Xover mayhem!
Update #43 · Sep 10, 2013 · 2 comments
Cosplay or Death
Alyana Heska, Senior Hakar of the Ashman Legion, searched the devastated ballroom for suitable weapons. The shambling hordes of mindless undead had already passed through once, and she’d been forced to hide. But now, she had just found an alternative. “Ah ha,” she muttered, and raised the paired silvery clubs. “Now let’s see those creatures stand against me.”
“Hey, Elena!” her companion yelled across the wrecked dealer’s room. “I just got a cell signal!”
Elena pushed up her mask and yelled back, “Damn it, Chuck!” She grabbed another bat and trotted over. “Don’t you know zombies are attracted to noise?”
“Then why were you yelling too?”
“Because you’re an idiot. And you broke character again!”
He groaned and accepted a bat. “It’s hard to breathe in that pig mask.”
“And fighting in skirts is easy?”
He glanced at her battle dress and grunted. “You practiced, at least. And weren’t some of those swords useable?”
She grumbled. “None of them were real. You just had to have ours shipped to the con.”
“It was easier than checking them would’ve been. Cheaper too.”
She grunted. “I need my swords. Then we’d show these zombies who’s boss.”
He glared and punched some buttons on his cell. “Well no one answers anywhere, but the signal is working.”
She brightened. “A net connection? Find out where my swords are!”
He stared at her, shocked. “You have got to be kidding!”
“You got the tracking number, right?”
“We’re in the middle of a goddam zombie apocalypse and you’re worried about friggin’ swords?”
She glared at him haughtily. “A senior hakar is never without her weapons. Except when her dumbass friend is trying to avoid issues with the TSA and a piddly baggage fee.”
“I think we should find some guns.”
“A Union Worker would never use a gun.” She smirked. “They’re not smart enough. Besides, this was a gaming convention. Not an NRA rally.”
He was fiddling with his phone. “There aren’t any gun stores near here anyway.”
“So, about my swords?”
Charles sighed heavily and punched it up. “Delivered to the hotel this morning. They’re probably in receiving or something.”
Elena squealed and clapped her hands. “Let’s go find them!”
“This place is huge! And full of zombies.”
“You’ve got your bat and shield—“
“—plastic garbage can lid—“
She ignored him, “—and except for the fast ones, they’re really easy to kill. What could go wrong?”
“Oh my god, you just had to say that!”
But Elena had already clapped her mask on, and headed towards the main lobby in search of a directory.
A half dozen zombies shambled about the lobby, some in hotel uniforms, others in costume. One, ironically, in a zombie mask. Alyana shouted a challenge and charged. Charles puffed along behind her. She felled two in as many strokes. The impacts reverberated into her arms, and she grinned at the metallic thuds.
“Elena!” Charles smashed into one grasping at her from behind. He knocked it prone and smashed its skull.
She finished the rest in rapid order. She pushed back her mask. “So, you didn’t forget everything from our LARPing days.”
Charles looked at the blood and bone congealing on his bat and made a face. “I feel a little sick. And you hate the sight of blood. How are you even doing this?”
“Elena hates blood, but Alyana revels in it. That’s the whole point of cosplay, you know. You can completely be someone else.”
“So you’ve said.”
She sighed. “Chuck, look, this is the most horrific thing that I’ve ever seen. I really don’t want to stop and think about it too much. But, if I’m in this mask, there is nothing that can stand in my way.”
He looked at her a long moment, then clapped his pig mask down. “Okay then. Am being looking for swords. I am being think receiving truck might be being behind hotel. We should find a back hallway.”
She giggled. “No articles in a Felskar accent. Pretend you’re Chekov.” She lowered her mask and led the way around the lobby counter to the back rooms.
“Oh right. Union Worker Forty-Two is being honored to be helping Shael Han warrior with task.”
She rolled her eyes. “Alyana is from Kartoresh. Did you even read the fluff?”
“Well how can I tell? They’ve got like two names for every faction. Except Hadross.”
Alyana hissed. “Hadross! They’re probably behind this whole zombie thing. Check that room.”
Charles opened a door. Four zombies looked up from their meal. He closed it immediately. “Wrong room!”
They sprang back from the door and smashed each zombie as it came through. Elena gave Chuck a critical eye. “You’re fighting your own shield too much. Get some rhythm to it. Try humming the WOK theme song or something.”
“Was there a theme song?”
She didn’t have time to answer. Two zombies rounded the far corner and dashed at them, slavering and moaning. “Runners!” she shouted.
“And more behind!”
Charles blocked one with his shield, and shoved it on its back. Alyana smashed it, tripped the second, and Chuck brought his heavy boot down on its skull. He hummed a rousing tune to himself and Elena grinned behind her mask. They made short work of the other zombies.
She pushed back her maskand said, “See? Helps right? Wait, that wasn’t Wrath of Kings.”
“What?”
“Your humming.” She thought a moment and sighed. “That’s Avengers. Didn’t you watch the WOK vids?”
Chuck got defensive. “All they played was drums. And what’s wrong with Avengers?”
She rolled her eyes. “Nothing. Fine. Whatever works.”
Something roared from around the distant corner. They both stared down the empty hall. She licked her lips. “I need my swords.”
“Well, we have to go that way to get them.”
Elena took a steadying breath, and lowered her mask. “Okay. Follow me, Forty-Two.”
“Am being following.”
The long low receiving dock was filled with rows of boxes and a few shambling zombies. Alyana spotted the delivery truck backed up to a bay door. “Ah ha!” she pointed. “And half unloaded. Perfect!”
“What am being plan?”
“You search. I’ll hold them off.” She paused. “And you’re not Bizarro. Chekov, remember: Chekov.”
Outside the creature roared again. Alyana took a steadying breath and moved forward.
The first few minutes were easy enough. The shufflers proved no problem for Alyana. At the truck, Forty-Two set to work. He ignored any package too small or too large, and scanned address labels.
A pair of runners spotted them, and Alyana charged to meet them. As she battled, the thing outside bellowed, much closer. A larger pack shuffled in from an open bay, and Alyana advanced to meet them. Breathing a little hard now, Elena sweated behind her mask. “I need those swords,” she muttered. “How’s it going back there?”
“Am still searching!” yelled Forty-Two from inside the truck.
Alyana continued her rampage, and cut a bloody swath through the thickening hordes. She tripped a runner that headed for the truck and smashed a fatty’s foot into the concrete floor. Another smash crushed its skull.
She took a moment to pause, and the latticed bay door next to her exploded inward. A huge zombie sporting bony spikes and a mouth that should never have fit a human skull pulled itself through the ruined door. It saw her and roared.
“Forty-Two, I need those swords!”
The massive thing charged. She leaped back, ran around a corner, and barely escaped its downward smash. Everywhere she turned were grasping hands and gaping maws. She lost a bat somewhere in the fray. She lashed out with her last weapon and slid through the enemy hordes, graceful as a dancer, lethal as a viper—until a lucky swipe ripped off her mask.
Panicked, she tried to scoop it up, but the abomination was right behind. She ran from row to row and even scrambled over lower stacks of boxes. She tripped on her skirt, and dropped her bat. The abomination ignored smaller obstacles, and stayed right on her heels. “I need my swords, I need my swords, I need my swords…” was her mantra.
“Alyana!” Forty-Two yelled. He was on top of the delivery truck with the hordes clambering to get up.
He hurled a flashing blade towards her. She caught it, grinned, and spun, slashing. The abomination lost several fingers from a grasping hand. It leaped back and yelped with rage and pain, a bizarrely human sound.
Alyana shouted, exultant, “At last, my arm is complete!” and charged.
In the aftermath, Chuck found her, breathing hard. His costume had lost several plates, and his own sword and shield were smeared with blood.
Elena picked her mask out from under a hacked-up corpse. The strap had broken, but it would be easy enough to fix.
Chuck asked, “Well, what now, senior hakar?”
She grinned at him. “Now we go in search of lunch. For some reason, I’ve worked up a real appetite.”
“The gore isn’t bothering you?”
She looked around. The receiving dock was a charnel house. Blood pooled in thick puddles and the stench rivaled the worst college fridge she’d ever opened.
“Nope.” She smiled wide. “Told you getting into the role would help. Although you’re using articles again. It should have been ‘Blood, it no does bother?’”
He groaned. “Oh, for the love of—“
“Just saying!”
END
Limit 1 each per Faction Starter or $50 spent on Wrath of Kings items (including trade ins). e.g. If you get 1 Faction Starter you may pick up both models. Ships with Zombivor versions (not pictured) and rules for Zombicide!
As usual just add the appropriate amount to your pledge.
Twilight Knight Xover: This limit also applies to the Twilight Knight, i.e. you can pick up the Twilight Knight, Elena and Charles altogether if you have 1 Faction Starter or at least $50 applied to Wrath of Kings items!
