Cruise ship attacked

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**Frazzled**

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/cruises/3538744/Pirates-attack-cruise-ship-off-Somali-coast.html

Pirates attack cruise ship off Somali coast
Shots were fired after the luxury cruise ship Oceania Nautica was chased by pirates in the Gulf of Aden.

By Oliver Smith
Last Updated: 7:08PM GMT 01 Dec 2008

The Oceania Nautica has outrun pirates off the coast of Somalia
A luxury cruise ship carrying dozens of British passengers has been attacked by pirates in the Gulf of Aden, off the coast of Somalia, en route to Oman.

The Oceania Nautica was fired at during its 32-day voyage from Rome to Singapore.

The ship – carrying 690 passengers and 386 crew – was approached yesterday by two small skiffs which fired several shots.

No one on board was hurt and Nautica's captain Jurica Brajcic was able to take evasive action and outrun the two boats.

"One of the skiffs did manage to close the range to 300 yards and fired eight rifle shots in the direction of the vessel before trailing off," said a statement by Oceania. "No one aboard Nautica was harmed and no damage was sustained."

29 Britons are on board the cruise ship, which is due to arrive in Oman today. Passengers paid an average of £15,000 for the cruise.

Last week's capture of the 330-metre Sirius Star, containing two million barrels of oil, was the largest of nearly 100 vessels to be attacked off the coast of Somalia this year.

However, the interception of a cruise ship is far less common. The Gulf of Aden is regularly crossed by cruise ships and the waters are patrolled by anti-piracy forces.

The last such incident involving a cruise ship occurred in November 2005 when the liner Seabourn Spirit was fired upon with automatic weapons and rocket-propelled grenades, injuring one crew member.

A spokeswoman for the Passenger Shipping Association - which represents Oceania Cruises - described the incident as a rarity, and maintained that cruising was a safe way to travel.

"Safety is of utmost importance to all cruise companies," she said.

"Each ship must follow security standards and procedures to ensure the well-being of passengers and staff, and they liase with national security and intelligence agencies."

The size of cruise ships means that it can be difficult to board them from smaller vessels. When threatened, some liners possess long-range acoustic devices (LRAD), which emit high frequency noise, to deter potential attackers.

Sound cannons? No no, we need 5" deck guns. Tell all those grandmas on the cruise ship that lunch is cancelled due to the pirates and BLAM BLAM BLAM there will be lots of dead pirates.

**dogma**

I imagine this was more personal posturing than an honest to god attack. It isn't like 2 light skiffs manned by, at most, 20 terrorists were going to overcome the passengers and crew of a cruise ship.

**Frazzled**

Achilles Lauro?

Seriously we're missing the awesome might of ticked off blue hairs. Put one or two fine Bofors antiaircraft cannon on port and starboard. If pirates show up charge the blue hairs $5 for ten seconds shooting. Whoever blows up a pirate boat gets a free drink and gaming chips in the casino. You could even make entire cruises out of it.

Pirate Cruises, the latest thing. Solves the problem of piracy and gives our retired grandmothers a little something extra to do. Its a Win Win!

Now thats change you can believe in.

**Kilkrazy**

Good news for Sweden's export industry too!

**dogma**

Frazzled wrote:Achilles Lauro?

In the Achiles Lauro incident terrorists boarded the ship at port, and were able sequester themselves in a relatively small part of the vessel prior to enacting their plan. Assaulting a moving ship is entirely different matter, especially given that most cruise lines are given to issuing security contracts to private paramilitary companies.

**Frazzled**

Hence the '?' I agree but could never figure out they atatcked the big ships in the first place. RPG 7s are not going to stop a supertanker.

See, not only can we get rid of pirates, and give our Sr. Citizens a renewed purpose in life, but we can cut out those paramilitary costs.

**sebster**

The bigger mystery is why there are cruise liners wandering around off the coast of Somalia. Great big oil tankers and the like I understand, you go where the product is, but a cruise liner?

‘Ooh honey look, week three we cruise pirate infested waters! It’ll be just like our honeymoon!’

**sexiest_hero**

People love to do things for the danger sebster.

Then they cry foul when things go FUBAR.

**Kilkrazy**

To go from the Mediterranean to India.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

You don't need guns! Just a few Geordies kept below decks in case of problems.

Newcastle, home of How Ye, the ancient north eastern art of unprovoked aggression....

**Frazzled**

Soccer Hooligans? An excellent example of additional lateral thinking. I'm thinking a tag team of cruisers carrying bored gambling grandmas (range shooters) and soccer hooligans (hand to hand boarding specialists). Not only could they bring security to this troubled area, but they could be a mobile security force, putting paid to hotspots around the world. No terrorist, pirate, or dictator will be safe at any location within two beers stumbling distance of shore. Unfortunately, this may lead to unintended consequences as any shopping center might be attacked and Brazil, Germany, and France will all be trembling during soccer season...

having said that if they are going to Brazil near Carnival time, then I volunteer to lead the troops, She Who Must Be Obeyed permitting of course.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

All you need to do, is to tell said Geordies that the Pirates have simaltaneously spilt their lass, and called their pint a puff.

Instant violence on a scale allegedly banned by the Geneva Convention!

Sadly, the Glaswegians are needed for home defence (look up the attack on Glasgow airport. Would call it a Terror attack but no one was scared) and the Scousers couldn't be trusted to not become a bigger problem.

**CaptainRavenclaw**

Somalia's crazy right now...they've had no functioning government for 15 years, its anarchy. even the muslim women are on the streets selling a drug named chat, which everybody takes....which makes them violent!!!

oh what a world!!

**Frazzled**

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:All you need to do, is to tell said Geordies that the Pirates have simaltaneously spilt their lass, and called their pint a puff.

Instant violence on a scale allegedly banned by the Geneva Convention!

Sadly, the Glaswegians are needed for home defence (look up the attack on Glasgow airport. Would call it a Terror attack but no one was scared) and the Scousers couldn't be trusted to not become a bigger problem.

My Universal translator is acting up again. What?

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

You tell the Gentleman from the Tyneside region of North Eastern England, that the Chappy you wish harm to befall, has inadvertantly caused loss of liquid from his spouse, and that he has cast aspirations as to the sexuality of his alcoholic beverage.

**Frazzled**

Excellent. I am sure that would generate the proper umbrage to insure Total Fatality!

**Apone**

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:All you need to do, is to tell said Geordies that the Pirates have simaltaneously spilt their lass, and called their pint a puff.

Instant violence on a scale allegedly banned by the Geneva Convention!

Sadly, the Glaswegians are needed for home defence (look up the attack on Glasgow airport. Would call it a Terror attack but no one was scared) and the Scousers couldn't be trusted to not become a bigger problem.

Pure gold. I loved the fact that within the British isles is the only place I've heard of a terror attack that ended in a worker in the airport kicking the terrorist whilst he was already on fire. I ****ing love Scotland. Funny stuff MDG

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

And then some!

Just because you are unconscious, there is still a chance you may not be a Geordie!

**Frazzled**

Apone wrote:
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:All you need to do, is to tell said Geordies that the Pirates have simaltaneously spilt their lass, and called their pint a puff.

Instant violence on a scale allegedly banned by the Geneva Convention!

Sadly, the Glaswegians are needed for home defence (look up the attack on Glasgow airport. Would call it a Terror attack but no one was scared) and the Scousers couldn't be trusted to not become a bigger problem.

Pure gold. I loved the fact that within the British isles is the only place I've heard of a terror attack that ended in a worker in the airport kicking the terrorist whilst he was already on fire. I ****ing love Scotland. Funny stuff MDG

Clearly the Scots are the missing 13th Tribe of Texas... Its like being at home.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

Pffrt.

Look skip, we invented the Bayonet Charge, which is a true story, saw off the Roman Empire (built a wall to keep us out) and are generally noted in History as having a touch of the mentals.

Texans? I excrete them!

**Frazzled**

We invented tequila.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

We invented England Bashing. We win.

**Ozymandias**

Frazzled wrote:We invented tequila.

You did not, Tequila comes from the Tequila region of Mexico.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tequila

You did invent Tex-Mex and my intestineshave never been the same.

Ozymandias, King of Kings

**Frazzled**

You forget young skywalker that Texas was part of Mexico or new Spain originally. WE too can claim the greatness of tequila.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

Pfffrt. America used to be part of Britain, before the war of ungratefulness

**Frazzled**

Pffrt. Britain used to be part of France before you lost TO THE FRENCH

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

Actually, no. That would be the Normans from Normandy, then a seperate entity from France.

Honestly.

**Frazzled**

You're forgeting Joan of Arc and all that. You lost to.. the French.

**Mad Doc Grotsnik**

English did matey. I'm Scottish.

**Canaan**

The French won something?