I did it!

My kidney! You give it back!

Hey! Give me my arm back! Don't beat me with it!

Your argument is invalid.

Is that a pin? Imma pull it! *boom*

Nerf this!

It's High Noon....

Lemme press the Q button...

I'm fantabulous.

FIRE IN THE HOLE!

Ha! That pitiful Deathwatch Captain named "Artemis" can't kill me! His sword is ap3, and I am a Terminator Sorceror!

Wait... Is that...?

Well feth, stasis bomb time for me.

Oh no, A One.

You know, it took a long time to work ou what army is best for me in this game. But I'm thinking it's Eldar!

WAAAAGH!

Oh look, it's moving!

It's leg day.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to leave more explicit instructions - I hope you find all the gold I hid."

Just to mess with my relatives.

That's not rain..

Heresy is for the weak.

"Grenade instructions. Step one, pull the pin. Step two, throw the... Ach, it's too water damaged to read. Guess I throw the pin, as it's so important."

The dog will flush him out...

The internet's down?

Ima just troll some neckbeards on 4chan for a while...

"By the way, it was me who took the last pickled onion."

Ha! I win! I'm the last pickled onion standing!

You won't pull that trigger. You don't have the guts to do it

But it said, "Harmless"

That thing's supposed to kill us? Pffftttt... Look at it! It's so cute!

Hi! I'd like to talk to you about...

I have come to collect m-

Hot potato!

Go long!

I got it!!!!
*falls off a cliff*

I'll catch him!

"This is a minor inconvenience."

"That's funny."

I smell Gas...

"Worth it..."

The xenomorph is right behind me isn't it?

It's only a mile back to the gas station, i'll be right back.

"You wouldn't."

You used all the hot water?

I can find my way in the dark just fine, I've been in there a million times..

Oops....

What's that beeping sound?

"It's easy. You just cut the blue wire."

THAT was TODAY?

Oh. I forgot my anniversary....

Did I have mud on my shoes?

Please no! I didn't mean to track mud on the floor!

I didn't leave the door open...Oh look, it's a clown!

I thought that it was wine!

Did you make a funny noise just now?

Why is my stomach beeping?

I'm sure it's safe...

Hey, dude, do you want to see a dead body?

Thanks for the ride, lady.

You don't have the......

 snurl wrote:
Thanks for the ride, lady.

I forgot all about that movie! Thanks. I think I'll look that up and watch it again.

My love, please forgive me

If you pull that trigger...

O come on....there are only four of them...

I broke your iPhone.

I can take a gunshot!

It's only a .22

Seriously, fire at me!

You lose.

I can do that again!

What are you gonna do, kill me? With a soup cup?

I'll hold the apple on my head!

C'mon, you don't believe in ghosts, do you?

I'm pretty sure it's wooden stakes for werewolves and silver bullets for vampires.

I'm certain about the fact that I can survive a nuclear blast by sitting in the fridge!

You just activated my trap card!

I am certain it is not trapped.

I see no way this could fail.

That place is not haunted. I'll prove it.

That's just a silly superstition!

They're going to bury what's left of you in a soup can!

I'm not afraid of unwrapped candy.

This candy tastes funny.

Why does the floor move?

If Daenarys can walk through fire, so can I.

How hot can it be?

Toonces look out!!!

This cheese ain't mouldy!

Look, I've been practising for five minutes, I can do it without a helmet.

We can't stop now!

I rolled a 1 on my initiative...

Anything but a one.

Thousand Sons ARE competitive. Bring as many Wraithknights as you want.

You go first.

It's just a scratch.

Tis but a flesh wound!

My hill.

I meant to do that.

(Alternate: Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.)

Did he mean to do that?

It's ok. I think he meant to do that.

But that means....

It's just the wind.

I looked in the mirror....and it blinked!

There's no one in the back seat.

What do you mean? I'm back here.

But then, who's driving?!

I don't know. Aren't you?

I thought you were.

I told you Toonces can drive.

What is walking up my neck?

Is that a spider?

You don't scare me.

Why is the flashlight flickering?

The drums - they've stopped!

Of course this island is safe. I'm sure that giant gorilla isn't real

Don't worry, I know what I'm doing.

Are you sure you know what you're doing?

Any fool could figure this out.

We all die alone

I saw this in a movie once.

It's just knife throwing, what could go wrong?

Hold the ballon in my teeth? Like this?

Yes. Just like that. Now hold still while I prime this grenade. I want to do this with style!

You're wrong.

Of course these creepy woods are a good shortcut! I'm never wrong!

Is that....blood?

Why's my arm on the floor there?

Do you think he's friendly?

Awwww.
It's a bear cub. Where's your your mom little fella?

I just stubbed my toe.

Wait, did you just say 'rat poison'?

Did that sugar container say "rat poison" on it?

This tastes like rat poison.

Here. Let me do it.

No I insist. I'LL do it.

You knucklehead! Let me show you how it's done.

I've got you in my sights!

Your powers are weak old man.

Merasmus! I'm going to pull a rabbit out of your a**!

Stop!

Alright lunger. Let's do it.

Stop! You have violated the law!

Fools!

What's the worst that could happen?

Pull da' pin and throw it! Wait.

Light fuse and get away. How far?

System.out.println("Goodbye world!");

"Jump" you say? OK....

Would you kindly hit me with that golf club?

Of course golfing during a lightning storm is a good idea!

Is that....snakes?

It's fine, they're not poisonous.

Do they bite?

Jason won't find me under this bed....

I can go down the chimney, just like Santa.

I don't need a helmet.

"A 'Carolina Reaper' Pepper eating contest? Sounds like fun!"

Look! A drone!

Hmm, what's that in the pod?

Nonsense!!!

Hogwash!

I think it's a dud, let me check and see.

What does the red button do?

Make my day.

Chuck Norris doesn't look so tough.

What's that beeping noise?

I must be imagining it, but did you ever notice, in the right light, that Trump's comb-over looks like a mound of small Cthulu tentacles?

We just failed our Haunt check...

That toy clown keeps moving around in the dark. Here, watch...

I think for my New Year's resolution I'll take up a new hobby. Rock climbing looks interesting!

This ice is thick enough.

Sharks? The water is only waist deep.

Alligators don't bite.

I know, right? Besides, these are all baby alligators.

That's not a baby alligator.....

How can you tell the difference?

Just grab it by the snout, roll it over, and Aaaghggh!!!!

Run. They don't exist, unless you open the door. They need to be invited in. No matter how much they beg, no matter how pathetic they look, do not let them in. Then, they will exist. They are not human. No matter how convincing they look. It's too late for me. Run.

Time to go full Machiavelli!

I have a feeling I'm going to laugh my ass off whenever I read that, for the next week.
*Chokes on own laughter*
Ack!

One more can,t hurt.

Not like it will kill.... Me....

Relax! Everybody knows Orks are afraid of humans...

That tapping isn't coming from the window, it's coming from the mirror!

Whatever you do. Do NOT open that door.

You mean like this?

Don't worry guys, if I can sticky jump in TF2 I can do it in real life

I think I'm going to try one of those stunts they do on 'Jackass'.

Hey y'all! Watch this!

Hold my beer!

What do you mean that wasn't your stomach growling?

I see spots.

Is your cat friendly?

Bet you I can jump the canyon!

I have been wanting to skydive all my life!

Who needs sleep?

Close the window would you? Its so hard to sleep under your bed with all this light...

Honey, did you just say "Get out!"?

Honey, you're fat.

Snurl put the knife down. We can talk about this

Where's the nearest hospital?

And just what are you going to do with THAT?

C'mon, urban exploring is fun and besides everybody knows that alligators living in the sewers is an urban myth, so relax.

I'll go into the sewer first then!

That's no log.

Don't worry, they're more afraid of us.

You'll have to suck the poison out.

One more round!

I have the high ground!

This will be easy.

I want to try!

I see no way this could fail.

This might fail, but I like a risk!

Shall we take a romantic walk over this old rope bridge?

So how long have you been driving for Uber?

Is that a wasp?

"I never thought it would end like this -- but I always kinda hoped it would..."

Your arrows cannot possibly penetrate my armor!

Got a light?

Good...... Looks like nobody's home.

We'll be fine. I don't think the heavy stuff will come down for hours yet.

You can't fool me!

We have enough gas.

What happens if I swallow the worm?

Just kidding.

No way!

That's it man....game over!

Once more unto the breach!

Hmmm, needs more butter.

Waiter.

Looks clear...

What's the dosage on these again?

These are neutral gang colors.

The ones with red caps are OK.

Owww! What the hell was that?

I feel funny

Nah, it's not too hot, watch this...

I'll check under the bed...

I'm fine, I don't need a Band-aid.

Tis but a scratch!

I've had worse...

Hit me!

Just to make it interesting....

For honor!

How could this go wrong?

Uh oh...

Don't press that!

D'oh!!!

Take the shortcut.

Don't worry guys. I'm a professional alien negotiator. Watch this!

This worked last time...well kind of

You're despicable.

Do you feel lucky, punk?

I do actually!

Make mine a double.

Oh yeah?!?

I think you're bluffing.

Fight me coward!

I'm certain

Ahem...

Where did that come from?

Is that you?

Is it me you're looking for?

You think I'll fall for that old trick?

Is that your backpack?

Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Oh
It's a gun?

I think we're gonna make it....

I'm just gonna sit here for a moment and catch my breath.

Don't worry guys, I watched a bomb defusal video online once

Blondes wouldn't understand.

That was fun!

Just a few more seconds...

You can't possibly have the range to hit me with that poleaxe!

Sounds simple enough...

Never.

Nope.Chuck Testa

My Hill

I know...

My Hill now!

This tastes funny...

Nah...it's fine.

Why does this taste like poison?

Fools!

You have no idea who you're dealing with...

You are no match for me!

One hand behind my back...just to make it fair.

OK, on three. One.....Two....

I'm sure there's still plenty of time...

"If I tuck them just like so, I can pretend I'm a girl."

The secret is to not look down!

Candyman. Candyman. Candyman.

The centrifugal force will hold me in place.

Nothing up my sleeve. Presto!

They don't look so tough...

So, Doc, what's the prognosis?

You cover, I'll move.

Man, I'm tired. Wake me if the Tyranids attack again, okay?

Medic! Oh wait, that's me...

Almost there...

Every man for himself!

I knew it...

What do you mean, incurable?

So be it.

Delete my browser history. Don't look at it, just delete it.