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Welcome to the 32nd Millennium then! It's nice here.

Well, if you have take a liking to warfare you'll be comfortable.

This is true. There is always a fight going on here

*Steps back out of the invisible timestate tunnel*

Do you know how much trouble it was to get here? The entrance to that tunnel is underneath a sleeping Tomb Spyder in a back room!

>> The marines hear an odd whistling sound in the air. As they look up, they are pelted with thousands of Pumpkin seeds.<<

*Shields head with gauntlet

Do you know if Pumpkins are somehow warp-affiliated, or is it just this one? Because it certainly has a tendency to keep coming back.

** an idea pops into your head *
*
<Xenos have many ways to infiltrate...are these seeds SPORES?>

*takes cover from the seeds*
These are nothing brothers! Ignore their lies!

*Plants helmet on head*

I do not believe that those seeds are compatiable with my physiology, but better safe than sorry.

*Looks around*

Oh yes. I am here to deliver a message.

*Hands data-slate to WK*

*takes the data-slate*
Hmm, what does this say....
Is this an ad for a grocery store?

Ad for a-
Wait, what?.

*Flicks the corner of the data-slate, and a new message appears*

*another ad appears in it's place*
Sexy singles are in my area
*looks around at all the marines plus a pumpkin*
Dafuq?

*Sighs

Brothers, did you not install anti-virus? You do know the Emperor himself condones unprotected machines.

*Replaces Farsight seamlessly*

Hold on a moment.

*Moves finger slightly and the advertisements cease to exist*

Does it display correctly now?

I think so. But it appears to be in a foreign language. Can you translate it?

It says... Timestate Horus Black Library Access Breach detected. Warning: Ahriman cannot be allowed to escape Prospero. Countdown 6/10 Cadia gone.
-Czevak

I have no idea what it is for. I was simply handed this and ordered to give it to you.

*Disappears*

*taps a button on the datapad*
*nuke launches from Terra*
Problem solved.

I'm sorry that I have to be the one to tell you this, but that missile lacks the range to reach Prospero.

Shall we send the Space Wolves instead?

OOC: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*raises an eyebrow*
*hands TheManWithNoPlan a telescope*
*he sees the nuke hit Prospero and explode the planet*
Oh really now?

Those poor Space Wolves.

*sad face*

Random space Wolf crash's through reality, destroying a parallel Terra in the process and lands on new Terra.

So, that was not too bad, my wolf axe even came with me complete with a thousand son head as a wolf trophy for the wolf wall on the fang, wolf time!

Anyone got a ferrasian ale about? Wolf?

Anyone even on this planet? Sits down and starts carving a small Viking longship with the axe.

Hello brother! Don't worry about the Thousand Sons, we just sent them into orbit with a nuke!

This head is a tad odd, I think it merged with my drinking horn now if you place a axe in the top it glows and ale pours out. Agh, warm ale, urgh. Serves me right for using a thousand son to make ale.....

Anyone know where Russ went?

He mentioned something about going to the bathroom after pimp slapping Magnus. Haven't heard from him since
*shrugs*

Better get comfey then. Starts carving a bench out of a nearby tree that's growing sideways.

So whats up with this planet then? I can smell a death guard about, a fist, some Traitor and a fishy smell?

*stuck on a planet with no ale, no wolf and not even cold enough to get snow..... Why Russ? *

Well brother Wolf. We're on Terra, everyone else seems to be gone, so we have nothing to do but sit here and talk. Occasionally an Ork horde will show up as well.

What's up brothers? Got any normie xeno's to kill?

Hello brother Pepe, there aren't any xenos here at the moment, you just missed the Flash Gitz horde of Kaptin Badrukk. I'm sure something will come along eventually.
*horde of orks appears on the horizon*
See? I told you.

Not so bad then Brother Ultramarine.

Least orks liven up this planet.
Names Ivan black wolf of the stone wolf clan from the island of the 5 wolves.

We like the word wolf. Here, have a carved drinking tankard, find a refidgeration unit and this head may make decent ale yet. You get used to the glowing ale.

Nice! Brothers, open fire on my command! 3, 2... 1... REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE