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Hello everybody,

I want to point my life in a healthy mental direction. So some great advice would well be great.

I live in Irvine CA with my father now and things are not as good as they use to be. My father's welding shop is getting no income to support house and family. He is always getting stressed by his wife that he never pays bills and provides money for the house payment. My Father hates this, he soon fears that they are going to lose the house and well their marriage. So my Father throws these idea's around that are a little bit crazy. Last year when he had a fallout with his wife he wanted to move down the street, he deposited a thousand dollars for a apartment that in the end we did not live in because his wife was pleading not to go. This time his idea is to move back to Mexico, yep. And he is really serious about this to, he knows he'll lose the house and his marriage, but why Mexico! I was fine with his idea last year, down the street no problem, same city, same school, same country. But Mexico, I don't know how to speak spanish and he wants to go to school there. That's one big change that I don't think I could make. So now I am thinking to live with my mother in Texas. Which leaves me at somewhat of a disposition.

Should I go with my father to mexico?

Should I leave to Texas this summer with my mother and leave my father all alone?

Should I try to talk my dad out of it?

I'm I being selfish for not wanting to go to Mexico?

Please help sort my thoughts.

That's a tricky situation. Have you spoken to your dad about the move? Be sure to let him know how you feel about moving to a foreign environment. Also, you're not being selfish for not wanting to go. It's a very sane reaction. I also wouldn't want to just leave all my stuff and go live in a foreign country.

Try and talk him out of it, and if unsuccessful, go to Texas.

Thanks. I think he knows I don't want to go but he keeps on pushing the idea over. Like "Why don't you talk to me in spanish, you're going to be there in a little bit." kind of thing. And he talked to my mother about it and she said that his plans of leaving where as soon as this summer.

If you kill his wife, you can stay in USA, claim her life insurance, get your dad to weld you a suit of armor with guns, and then you can get a job killing bad guys and help your dad pay for rent. Call yourself Steel Man.

How old are you?

Whatever happens, try to remember that what is going on is between your parents and is not your fault.

Try not to hold anything against either parent or against yourself.


I would recommend staying in Texas.

Stay in US, avoid sneaky Mexicans

Pslotha wrote:If you kill his wife, you can stay in USA, claim her life insurance, get your dad to weld you a suit of armor with guns, and then you can get a job killing bad guys and help your dad pay for rent. Call yourself Steel Man.

Mmm... no. I don't want to be a criminal.

Scrabb wrote:How old are you?

Whatever happens, try to remember that what is going on is between your parents and is not your fault.

Try not to hold anything against either parent or against yourself.


I would recommend staying in Texas.

I am 17 right now, kind of sucks because next year I think will be some kind of mess for me. Thanks for the recommendation.

Anshal wrote:Stay in US, avoid sneaky Mexicans

Why are Mexican's sneaky to you?

If you:
- don't know anybody else in Mexico
- don't speak the language, much less natively
- don't have money
- don't have the ability to work in Mexico
then, I think that going to Mexico is a bad idea for you.

The thing that you might have on your side is:
+ OK with the food?


Seriously, if you can't stay in Irvine, and your choices are either Mexico or else Texas, go to Texas.


The only remaining possibility is to emancipate yourself and go to work on your own, live with friends. That's a tough thing if you don't even have your HS diploma.

Yeah was thinking about emancipation but it might a bad idea.

Dude, you're 17, take advantage of that and stay in the U.S. I can understand if you have problems with your mother, but moving to Mexico is some serious gak.

Parents are just people, don't get dragged down by your dad's desperation. A large family in the area you are moving to, could be the reason, but I really don't know why your pop would think it a good idea.

Yeah, I think U.S. of A it is, even though I really don't like Texas. Hopefully I can talk him out of it, the sooner the better I suppose.

@ Ultrafool becaus said Mexicans have ripped me of before

Anshal wrote:@ Ultrafool becaus said Mexicans have ripped me of before

I know a guy that was robbed by a white dude. A complicated world we live in.

Go live w/ frazzled in texas.

Don't go to mexico. Terrible.

Texas it is for you, boy, with your loving mother, who will buy you stuff.

Karon wrote:Go live w/ frazzled in texas.

Don't go to mexico. Terrible.

Texas it is for you, boy, with your loving mother, who will buy you stuff.

Just stay of his lawn....

Personally I'd head for Texas.

Alrighty then, Texas it is, but as a plan B if I cannot get my stubborn father out of his phase. Just have to wait until he comes back from Mexico.

Man is he going to hate me when he gets home. Yesterday while playing basketball I had the misfortune of a elbow hitting me in the back of the head. Mild to mid serve concussion. Hope he has insurance because that hospital bill isn't pretty.

Also, I'm not sure if there is any warhammer crowd IN mexico. Though, I look at mexico as I do Uganda.

I am not really worried about a warhammer crowd, should I be.

Quite frankly, I think you have much more serious issues to consider than Warhammer...

But its a super cereal part of my life. (kidding)

From the sounds of it your old man is having a pretty rough time of it, most people who are struggling with things tend to focus mainly on how it will effect them, so he may not even be considering or aware of how you feel. My advice is to grab some time with him when he isn't looking too stressed. If you guys have a hobby you both like (fishing or baseball) then this would be a good opporuntiy. Tell him exactly how you feel and importantly what you want. He may not realise it straight away but he does need to be thinking about you and your needs as much as his own.
It is also important to think about anything which you can do to help the situation without taking too much on yourself. It could be something simple like dropping flyers to advertise his business, doing the cooking once a week or maybe working a few hours with him in the evenings or weekends.
If things don't work out and he does end up moving to Mexico, only go if you want to. It would be a bad decision to go out of some sense of loyalty, parents shouldn't force or coerce their children into following their lifestyle just because it suits them. You need to follow the path that makes you the happiest, or if not happy then the least miserable.

Thank you squilverine.