Numbskull theater manager gets VERY lucky at IM 3 screening.

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**Lordhat**

I don't know how this ended with nobody dead or gravely wounded. I'll tell you one thing, if I were asked to do this I would have said no way, and then called the police and whomever owned the theatre to let them know what this fething moron was planning. All in all, everybody involved must be at least semi-slowed.

http://www.avclub.com/articles/movie-theater-manager-finds-way-to-make-iron-man-3,97607/

Tasked with finding some way, any way to get people excited for Iron Man 3, the manager of a movie theater in Jefferson City, Missouri, hit upon the idea of having people dressed in full tactical gear and carrying what appeared to be assault weapons storm the screening, thus causing the audience to freak out over what a great time at the movies they were about to have. Also, unfortunately and somehow unexpectedly, over the possibility of this being a deadly theater shooting akin to last year’s tragedy in Aurora, Colorado—a conclusion many jumped to, after their own comic-book movie premiere was similarly interrupted by gun-toting, body armor-clad men. Regrettably, they didn't stop to consider the possibility that maybe those men were supposed to be members of the fictional government agency S.H.I.E.L.D., and not just everyday crazy people out to murder everyone, probably due to the creeping adult cynicism that so erodes our childlike sense of wonder.
Police responded to several of these panicked theatergoers' 911 calls, with Capt. Doug Shoemaker later telling local news affiliates it was a good thing an off-duty officer wasn’t in attendance, because he likely would have failed to realize this was just the fun kind of surprise armed invasion. Said Shoemaker, “Everything was in place, it's the opening night of a superhero movie, it's somebody walking in all-dark clothes, everything pointed to bad things about to happen. There’s really no good that can come of this.”
Except entertainment, of course, which is what theater manager Bob Wilkins thinks he was providing and, for some reason, is supposed to provide. “My job is to entertain people,” Wilkins said of his self-assigned duties, which go beyond just ensuring that movies start on time and that his employees don’t contaminate the popcorn with their molting teenaged skin, like most theater managers who don’t also believe they work in the entertainment industry. Among those successfully entertained by Wilkins was retired Army war veteran John Molock, who said Wilkins’ stunt had triggered his PTSD—which we can only surmise stands for “Party Time Superhero Day.” Congratulations to Bob Wilkins for making that happen for him.

**IronWarLeg**

Wow, its even more mind boggeling to think that he had to pitch this to the guys storming the theaters and his employees and nobody stopped and thought: "Hey, umm.."

What a fething moron... this leaves me pretty much speechless as to how to reply... except for what a fething moron..

**LordofHats**

Can't fix stupid.

**Cheesecat**

IronWarLeg wrote:
Wow, its even more mind boggeling to think that he had to pitch this to the guys storming the theaters and his employees and nobody stopped and thought: "Hey, umm.."

What a fething moron... this leaves me pretty much speechless as to how to reply... except for what a fething moron..

Honestly, as an employee I wouldn't question it as it's a catastrophe waiting to happen, which I would find amusing.

**Jihadin**

Can't fix stupid.

With a tanker bar....WD40....100MPH tape.....and a Skillcraft pen....I make a good ATTEMPT

**Melissia**

Stupid and dead is still stupid, Jihadin. You should know that.

**Jihadin**

Stop Meliss......It'll be fun in the ATTEMPT TO FIX

We can chaulk it up to......remedial common sense training

**Dreadclaw69**

The stupidity burns!!!!

How was this considered a good idea?

**Jihadin**

Easy...the Good Idea Fairy came by........

**Dreadclaw69**

So like the tooth fairy did it take the good idea and replace it with something else?

**Sir Samuel Buca**

Maybe it's because I'm English and we're bred to avoid things such as this, but this has got to be one of the stupidest things I have ever heard. The fact that someone could come up with this idea, then persuade others to join in!

**WarOne**

Sir Samuel Buca wrote:
Maybe it's because I'm English and we're bred to avoid things such as this, but this has got to be one of the stupidest things I have ever heard. The fact that someone could come up with this idea, then persuade others to join in!

And in the worst case scenario, leave several dead over an inane idea that would of horribly backfired.

**Snrub**

Tasked with finding some way, any way to get people excited for Iron Man 3, the manager of a movie theater in Jefferson City, Missouri, hit upon the idea of having people dressed in full tactical gear and carrying what appeared to be assault weapons storm the screening

Got this far, stopped reading. Proceeded to bang my head on the desk.

**Relapse**

I was looking at this article, thinking no one can be this stupid and wondering why I didn't see this broadcast all over the place. That, along with the strange way it was written, made me doubt the truth of it.
I did a quick check to find that the AV Club is associated with the Onion: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Av_club

**Valion**

Relapse wrote:
I was looking at this article, thinking no one can be this stupid and wondering why I didn't see this broadcast all over the place. That, along with the strange way it was written, made me doubt the truth of it.
I did a quick check to find that the AV Club is associated with the Onion: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Av_club

It is, but it isn't satire.

**Relapse**

Holy crap, there are people that stupid. I just saw another article that mentioned it.

**SagesStone**

Lets be thankful this guy wasn't the manager of an airport.

**Kanluwen**

If people mistook these actors for "armed gunmen", I'm more worried about what that says for their observational skills than anything else.

**Vulcan**

The reason none of the employees argued with the manager over his idiotic idea is because of Missouri 'at will employment labor laws. Here, you can be fired for any reason at all, with no notice.

Arguing with a boss is one of the more common causes of termination in this state. And since the paper always says 'Not a team player' you can't even collect unemployment afterwards.

**Alfndrate**

Man, Pepper Pots really let herself go...

**hotsauceman1**

Why not just have men lining the hall with very obvious Shield ICONs? Or having the Snack stand Manned by them??

**LordofHats**

Kanluwen wrote:

In a dark theatre? I can see it. No the dude in the iron man get up of course but the rest of them? I wouldn't blame anyone for freaking out. It was a stupid idea.

**Kanluwen**

LordofHats wrote:
Kanluwen wrote:

In a dark theatre? I can see it. No the dude in the iron man get up of course but the rest of them? I wouldn't blame anyone for freaking out. It was a stupid idea.

The big thing is that all their "guns" have the bright orange safety tip. You can even see it on the pistols.

I mean, unless I've missed something there's a reason they choose bright orange for the "safety tip" on airsoft/replica firearms like those.

**SagesStone**

Again in a dark cinema maybe the rifles, but the safety tip on the pistols is much less noticable.

**Kanluwen**

I just don't see how a reasonable person could mistake these individuals as anything other than a silly marketing stunt.

**purplefood**

I'd say it isn't unreasonable to expect that to happen.

**HiveFleetPlastic**

It's pretty depressing that the first thought would be, "hey, armed gunmen are here to kill me" instead of "oh, this is obviously an act." :(

**SlaveToDorkness**

Kan, it's still a VERY horribly stupid idea. You cannot explain away the stupid.

Besides, even if nobody freaked out, what would be the payoff? Some dorks run into the theater and wave toys around. Then what?

Best case scenario: dumb crap interrupting my movie.

Worst case: People die.

Does Missouri have a conceal and carry law? Luckily nobody got their face shot off.

**Kanluwen**

SlaveToDorkness wrote:
Kan, it's still a VERY horribly stupid idea. You cannot explain away the stupid.

Nowhere did I say it wasn't a stupid idea. I said that I'm worried about the observational skills of the individuals within the theater if they thought the actors were gunmen.

Besides, even if nobody freaked out, what would be the payoff? Some dorks run into the theater and wave toys around. Then what?

The payoff is that the theater would likely be notable in the mind of its patrons.
Of course they will be now anyways, but still...

**purplefood**

Kan, no one takes in every detail of a situation. If they failed to notice orange tips on a gun in a dark theatre i wouldn't be surprised. Especially when they'll see the silhouette of a gun and take action on that which IMO is a better idea than waiting until the person does or doesn't shoot you.