Which of your models hate you?

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**Slaphead**

My Blood Angels. Out of all my armies they are the most unlucky. For whatever reason I roll a lot more 1's with them than any of my other armies, sometimes it borders on ridiculous odds with the amount of 1's I roll. I would need to make a handful of 2+ rolls and most of them would be 1's. They seem to be cursed.

**DoomShakaLaka**

My stormtalon has been intercepted and shot down before it could do anything EVERY SINGLE GAME!!

**Yarium**

Maybe I've just played long enough, but everything I owned has performed proudly during at least 1 engagement. Yes, even the Tervigon that often just poops out guys once, or fails to manifest a single psyker power, or dies nearly right away and takes out all the guys it pooped out. Spot #2 would be the Lascannon Devastators. Been a long time since I've played with my Marines (I like being a special snowflake), but back when I was using them, they'd take always take one turn of shooting then run off the board, even when there's lots of board between them and the edge.

**hanshotfirst**

anything with a melta...

**Selym**

I don't have one, but one of my friends has a Librarian (kitbashed as his Chief Librarian) who never succeeds with offensive powers, and regularly fails his defensive powers at key moments.

Tends to get his face bashed in by my EC as punishment for disobeying his master.

**Talizvar**

My Stormtalon.

Takes forever to make his reserves roll, flies-in, chews half a squad in the first chance at shooting(

) and does Jack after that (

).
Every... single... time.
Trying to get the Tech-Marines to look at his GPS and how sensitive the targeting system is to deceleration... something... anything.

**oldzoggy**

My Icon bearing deamons they look great but are top heavy and seem to enjoy to break.

**Slayer-Fan123**

None of them, because if I take into account how many times I've used a model and taken into account averages, it will still go into the, well, average performance.

**darkcloak**

I'll second the Stormtalon!

I feel bad using it sometimes cuz I'm like oh flyers...

But then I use it and plooey. Knocked outta the sky before I can really do much with it.

Probably owes more to the other player wanting to zap it rather than any fault of the unit itself... Or is it?

Its because I missed a grille insert and the damned thing hates me!

**Frozocrone**

Tervigon.

First time using it: 2,2,1.

Alright buddy, time to make up for the last time!

1,1,1.

Now bring two if I bring one, they seem to have a competition on who can spawn the most gaunts and make the Hive Mind happiest.

**Lammikkovalas**

Slayer-Fan123 wrote:
None of them, because if I take into account how many times I've used a model and taken into account averages, it will still go into the, well, average performance.

Stop sucking the fun out of our whining with your pesky facts!

**Selym**

Lammikkovalas wrote:
Slayer-Fan123 wrote:
None of them, because if I take into account how many times I've used a model and taken into account averages, it will still go into the, well, average performance.

Stop sucking the fun out of our whining with your pesky facts!

Yeah!
We all know that unpainted models are 66.6% less effective than painted

**Lammikkovalas**

Selym wrote:
Lammikkovalas wrote:
Slayer-Fan123 wrote:
None of them, because if I take into account how many times I've used a model and taken into account averages, it will still go into the, well, average performance.

Stop sucking the fun out of our whining with your pesky facts!
Yeah!
We all know that unpainted models are 66.6% less effective than painted

But if you paint them TOO well, they'll never perform as well as could be expected.

**Selym**

Lammikkovalas wrote:
Selym wrote:
Lammikkovalas wrote:
Slayer-Fan123 wrote:
None of them, because if I take into account how many times I've used a model and taken into account averages, it will still go into the, well, average performance.

Stop sucking the fun out of our whining with your pesky facts!
Yeah!
We all know that unpainted models are 66.6% less effective than painted

But if you paint them TOO well, they'll never perform as well as could be expected.

And the closer a model is to perfection, the faster it dies.

**Nevelon**

But fresh paint always dies a horrible death.

**vipoid**

The Monolith, back in 4th when I last used one.

3 games in a row it was wrecked by the first shot at it.

**Lammikkovalas**

Nevelon wrote:
But fresh paint always dies a horrible death.

But it's still nothing compared to unpainted. Best just to get it over with and take the hits, lick your wounds and then wreck faces.

**scommy**

My Lascannon Devastators. They love rolling 1s.

**Hanskrampf**

My Devastators. They just can't hit anything, no matter what weapons I give them. They were replaced by a Tri-Las Predator that actually hits its targets.
My Command Squad with Special Weapons, Stormshields and 4+ FNP survives nearly anything but when the most basic guns shoot at them, they die. Like 3 deaths out of 5 wounds.

**evildrspock**

Desubot wrote:
My dice.

dice are models right?

My old set of yellow dice that match my Imperial Fists army seem to roll an unbalanced number of 1's and 2's. I've ran trials where I roll all the dice lots of times and count the results, and they seem off. However, I just cannot bring myself to part with the dice as they match, plus new dice are just another cost and I'd rather have another army.

During my most recent game, my Vindicator decided it would only kill 0 - 2 infantry models per turn, and of course got immobilized turn 2 in a swamp because I'm that odd player who doesn't take siege shields on them.

**Buttery Commissar**

My Mordian HWS... They mostly just baffle people by managing to miss at long range whilst looking like three guys sat on very tiny, unbalanced see-saws.

Last time I used them, they failed hard for three rounds and then my team mate crashed a Dakkajet onto them.

**niv-mizzet**

Mephiston.

He always takes at least one perils within the first turn of casting, including back in 6th when it was just Ld test and only double 1's and 6's peril'd. I have NEVER wounded an enemy model with his plasma pistol. I HAVE however had Mephy Kill himself with his own gets hot on the pistol straight through his 2+ armor in multiple games. Even had a game where I refused to shoot before charging because he was at 1 wound, because I knew what would happen. Opponent was like "BS, 2+ to hit and 2+ armor means there's only like a 3% chance!" I proceeded to tell him "IF I was going to shoot, these would be my rolls" and promptly rolled a 1 followed by a 1. He was flabbergasted.
Mephy also likes to fail 4 inch charges with fleet for me, has never had transfixing gaze work, and has never passed a fnp.

**Lord Commissar**

My fate weaver has a committed relationship with the ground.

**Agent_Tremolo**

I was assembling my kataphron destroyers just yesterday. Battling with the insanely hard plastic GW is churning out these days, I applied a bit too much pressure and the hobby knife slid past the sprue and straight into my thumb.

So, my battle servitors have taken their first toll in blood - My own. A promising start.

**Selym**

niv-mizzet wrote:
Mephiston.

He always takes at least one perils within the first turn of casting, including back in 6th when it was just Ld test and only double 1's and 6's peril'd. I have NEVER wounded an enemy model with his plasma pistol. I HAVE however had Mephy Kill himself with his own gets hot on the pistol straight through his 2+ armor in multiple games. Even had a game where I refused to shoot before charging because he was at 1 wound, because I knew what would happen. Opponent was like "BS, 2+ to hit and 2+ armor means there's only like a 3% chance!" I proceeded to tell him "IF I was going to shoot, these would be my rolls" and promptly rolled a 1 followed by a 1. He was flabbergasted.
Mephy also likes to fail 4 inch charges with fleet for me, has never had transfixing gaze work, and has never passed a fnp.

And I thought my Battlecannon rolls were bad, at 2 woumds per game per cannon on average!

**King Pariah**

Kharn the Betrayer.

He would kill any ONE model of the opponents assuredly. And then he'd go, "well, there's another skull for Khorne, I'm done." And proceed to immediately die the following turn whether it be to other models also in the assault or shot to death. Lazy gakker.

**Tactical_Spam**

My divination librarian that always ends up woth my Devs... Never gets Prescience off until 2 guys are left standing and then he perils himself to death.

second place spot is my tacticals... 20 tacticals with full plasma (gun, pistol and cannon) failed to kill 5 terminators. I also run Imperial Fist tactics and somehow none of the bolters manage to hit or wound

**Selym**

Any 6mm infantry I meet. I just cannot get paint to work on them. Killed a whole platoon of storm troopers through paint testing. Luckily, I have two more platoons, but they are awaiting their fateful meeting with the brush...

**angelofvengeance**

My brother's Maulerfiend- he sends it after my dreadnought every time. And every time my dreadnought gives it a power fist enema lol.

**Smacks**

Pretty much anything Orky. It was especially prominent during 2nd edition when almost all Ork wargear had some inherent randomness, which always looked amazing on paper "all I have to do is roll a 5 or 6", but in practice it either didn't work, or blew up and killed you.