Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
Times and dates in your local timezone.
Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now.
Lol, as I am currently in your boat (soon to be not)... we used to be dual-military as well.
But yeah... for someone with no military experience, the free medical, cheap dental (it isn't free no more), I used to throw in housing... but it's a bit crap everywhere I've been. The PX/BX/ Navy Exchange, etc. and Commissary are decent enough, especially if you like certain regional brands, and don't live in that region (or international stuff).
And I'll echo CptJake... Worst time for the wife and I was when we were in Germany, we both lost BAH to live in cramped, tiny quarters that were definitely not big enough for our needs (what can I say, we both have a propensity for books, which take up space)
Damn that must have sucked. Did they force you to live in base housing or did you choose to? I'd never choose to live on base.
I lived in japan while single for 2 years and lived in town in a nice 2bdr apt and was living it up like a king. I had enough BAH&BAS left over to eat out at the local shops every night. When I was married I was living in a 3 bdrm house in japan with it's own drive way. In japan parking is harder to get than a car and you have to prove you have a place to park a car before you can buy one.
So remember kids, Go Navy and skip all that silly nonsense on who is and is not a marine, and live better.
Mozzyfuzzy wrote: If he's claiming benefits off this, does it not count as stolen valour, or does that require medals and commendations?
As said there is no such crime. I know of no law that requires stores, coffee shops etc give soldiers (police, firefighters, security guards etc) discounts so if you for some reason are mistaken for a guy that gets a discount it's the provider's loss for being generous. But I agree that it is sleazy to take advantage of it.
Damn that must have sucked. Did they force you to live in base housing or did you choose to? I'd never choose to live on base.
Indeed it did... And not only because of the space issues I already mentioned. It's fething drama city seemingly at least half of the damn time. We got pretty lucky in that our stairwell was fairly drama free... we were either friends with the neighbors, or the other ones were pretty quiet.
And yeah... shortly before we got in country, the command group for our garrison put out the order that unless there were "special circumstances," no servicemember was to live "on the economy" as he felt there was too much room for soldiers to get shafted. The entire time I was there, there were 2 exemptions granted that I am aware of: one, a dude in my company's wife worked for a 3 letter agency, and said agency provided housing closer to work than the on-base accommodations. The other, a complete gakker-waffle gak-bag soldier (he also happened to come from the same unit I had left... needless to say, we had issues) arrived and "demanded" housing for his 9 huskies.... Yeah, seriously, this tool wanted to bring a literal sled team to the country.
Spetulhu wrote: As said there is no such crime. I know of no law that requires stores, coffee shops etc give soldiers (police, firefighters, security guards etc) discounts so if you for some reason are mistaken for a guy that gets a discount it's the provider's loss for being generous. But I agree that it is sleazy to take advantage of it.
That's not true, what fraud needs is a lie and a material benefit. It doesn't matter whether the other person was required to provide for you or not. If you go around lying to people to say you have cancer and taking donations, you have committed fraud. If you claim you are a marine and take a discount, you have committed fraud.
The sticking point in this case is whether the guy genuinely believes he is a marine or not. Because for it to be fraud he'd have to be deliberately lying, telling people he was a marine when he knew he wasn't really.
“We may observe that the government in a civilized country is much more expensive than in a barbarous one; and when we say that one government is more expensive than another, it is the same as if we said that that one country is farther advanced in improvement than another. To say that the government is expensive and the people not oppressed is to say that the people are rich.”
Adam Smith, who must have been some kind of leftie or something.
4 pages of mostly butt hurt replies amazing! I served 6 years in the Marine Corps infantry and was medically discharged for PTSD. Guess what, I don't care about what OPs Brother in Law did and neither should anyone else. You got the power to change his lame attitude? Time to apply Derek Weida's 3 foot circle rule. It's out of my 3 foot circle IDGAF.
DrNo172000 wrote: 4 pages of mostly butt hurt replies amazing! I served 6 years in the Marine Corps infantry and was medically discharged for PTSD. Guess what, I don't care about what OPs Brother in Law did and neither should anyone else. You got the power to change his lame attitude? Time to apply Derek Weida's 3 foot circle rule. It's out of my 3 foot circle IDGAF.
Well obviously you DGAF, otherwise you wouldn't be posting. So you can get off your high horse and come wallow in the mud with the rest of us.
DrNo172000 wrote: 4 pages of mostly butt hurt replies amazing! I served 6 years in the Marine Corps infantry and was medically discharged for PTSD. Guess what, I don't care about what OPs Brother in Law did and neither should anyone else. You got the power to change his lame attitude? Time to apply Derek Weida's 3 foot circle rule. It's out of my 3 foot circle IDGAF.
Well obviously you DGAF, otherwise you wouldn't be posting. So you can get off your high horse and come wallow in the mud with the rest of us.
I posted to make fun of all the people so worried about some dude wearing moto gear. Veteran butt hurt syndrome is hilarious "OMG bros stolen valor". So many of my fellow vets getting worked up over nothing. The key to the 3-foot rule is not being mad about it. I'm not mad, just laughing.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Reminds me of the time so many people got so upset over the under armor shirt that was basketball players raising a net like the Iwo flag.
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2016/11/08 14:57:35
DrNo172000 wrote: 4 pages of mostly butt hurt replies amazing! I served 6 years in the Marine Corps infantry and was medically discharged for PTSD. Guess what, I don't care about what OPs Brother in Law did and neither should anyone else. You got the power to change his lame attitude? Time to apply Derek Weida's 3 foot circle rule. It's out of my 3 foot circle IDGAF.
Well obviously you DGAF, otherwise you wouldn't be posting. So you can get off your high horse and come wallow in the mud with the rest of us.
I posted to make fun of all the people so worried about some dude wearing moto gear. Veteran butt hurt syndrome is hilarious "OMG bros stolen valor". So many of my fellow vets getting worked up over nothing. The key to the 3-foot rule is not being mad about it. I'm not mad, just laughing.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Reminds me of the time so many people got so upset over the under armor shirt that was basketball players raising a net like the Iwo flag.
So, do you consider a kid who failed out of boot camp in the first two weeks to be a Marine?
Every time a terrorist dies a Paratrooper gets his wings.
DrNo172000 wrote: 4 pages of mostly butt hurt replies amazing! I served 6 years in the Marine Corps infantry and was medically discharged for PTSD. Guess what, I don't care about what OPs Brother in Law did and neither should anyone else. You got the power to change his lame attitude? Time to apply Derek Weida's 3 foot circle rule. It's out of my 3 foot circle IDGAF.
Well obviously you DGAF, otherwise you wouldn't be posting. So you can get off your high horse and come wallow in the mud with the rest of us.
I posted to make fun of all the people so worried about some dude wearing moto gear. Veteran butt hurt syndrome is hilarious "OMG bros stolen valor". So many of my fellow vets getting worked up over nothing. The key to the 3-foot rule is not being mad about it. I'm not mad, just laughing.
Automatically Appended Next Post: Reminds me of the time so many people got so upset over the under armor shirt that was basketball players raising a net like the Iwo flag.
So, do you consider a kid who failed out of boot camp in the first two weeks to be a Marine?
I don't have an opinion either way tbh. I simply don't care about what he does, it has no immediate effect on my life.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Ouze wrote: I definitely want to know more about how this 3 foot rule works, exactly.
(nm, I found the video)
If I can turn just one person onto the 3-Foot rule I have succeeded! On the real I love Derek Weida.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/11/08 16:41:30
I don't have an opinion either way tbh. I simply don't care about what he does, it has no immediate effect on my life.
So...you went to a thread on a message board (a place literally designed to facilitate conversation about a subject) in order to share the amazing and immensely interesting revelation that you don't care at all about about the subject being discussed.
Best get cracking then mate, I'm sure there's literally thousands of threads on this forum where you could post that little tidbit of information and it would be equally as (ir)relevant.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/11/08 18:23:15
I don't have an opinion either way tbh. I simply don't care about what he does, it has no immediate effect on my life.
So...you went to a thread on a message board (a place literally designed to facilitate conversation about a subject) in order to share the amazing and immensely interesting revelation that you don't care at all about about the subject being discussed.
Best get cracking then mate, I'm sure there's literally thousands of threads on this forum where you could post that little tidbit of information and it would be equally as (ir)relevant.
Sweet! Are the Mods actually starting to crack down on this sort of posting? Because that would be great. Especially in the N&R section.
Ouze wrote: I definitely want to know more about how this 3 foot rule works, exactly.
I also want to know more. Where does the 3 foot circle emanate from? I'm taller than 3 foot, if I injure an extremity am I allowed to GAF? What if I'm lying down? Also does it have vertical limits? Like if someone drops something on you from a hight, or you jump out of an aircraft, is it okay to start GAF right away? Or if your kid falls down a well that's deeper than 3 foot. What about driving, should I incorporate stopping distance into the 3 foot formula? Do phone calls count as being where the phone is or where the caller is? What about abstract ideas that don't have a physical location?
I can't help feeling distance might be an inadequate indicator of whether things are worth GAF about.
I don't have an opinion either way tbh. I simply don't care about what he does, it has no immediate effect on my life.
So...you went to a thread on a message board (a place literally designed to facilitate conversation about a subject) in order to share the amazing and immensely interesting revelation that you don't care at all about about the subject being discussed.
Best get cracking then mate, I'm sure there's literally thousands of threads on this forum where you could post that little tidbit of information and it would be equally as (ir)relevant.
No, what I'm saying is it doesn't matter if he calls himself a Marine or not. It wouldn't' matter if he attended zero days of recruit training. Just ignore the guy and move on about your day is my advice to the OP. You'll feel much better.
Automatically Appended Next Post:
Stormwall wrote: I don't think it's butthurt. I think it is simply a "no he is not and here is why."
Honestly, it is what it is.
Naah man, I'm around fellow vets constantly. They get super worked up about this stuff, and for what? Oh no that guy called himself a Marine! He can call himself the Dali Lama who cares. I knew a guy who got separated at Boot Camp, never made it to the Crucible. Guess what he has his honorable discharge certificate proudly displayed. Good for him. He can call himself whatever he wants.
Ouze wrote: I definitely want to know more about how this 3 foot rule works, exactly.
I also want to know more. Where does the 3 foot circle emanate from? I'm taller than 3 foot, if I injure an extremity am I allowed to GAF? What if I'm lying down? Also does it have vertical limits? Like if someone drops something on you from a hight, or you jump out of an aircraft, is it okay to start GAF right away? Or if your kid falls down a well that's deeper than 3 foot. What about driving, should I incorporate stopping distance into the 3 foot formula? Do phone calls count as being where the phone is or where the caller is? What about abstract ideas that don't have a physical location?
I can't help feeling distance might be an inadequate indicator of whether things are worth GAF about.
It's more a metaphorical circle, as in don't get mad about stuff you can't change. Here's a example we can all understand, GW got rid of fantasy, some guy burned his army. For what? What good does being so angry about that do for you? What good does being even a little angry about it do? Some being mad about something they can't control is just silly.
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2016/11/08 20:02:09
Yeah, I'm sorry, I was being facetious (or whatever the inverse of facetious is). I do agree with you that getting angry about stuff often doesn't help. I've seen people do things like smash their controller when they lose at a game. It's a really dumb behaviour, because firstly games are supposed to be fun, and secondly, now you've busted your controller and made more problems for yourself. On the other hand, expressing an opinion doesn't necessarily mean people are angry and butthurt, I think most people just hang out here to be sociable.
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2016/11/08 21:12:57
Smacks wrote: Yeah, I'm sorry, I was being facetious (or whatever the inverse of facetious is). I do agree with you that getting angry about stuff often doesn't help. I've seen people do things like smash their controller when they lose at a game. It's a really dumb behaviour, because firstly games are supposed to be fun, and secondly, now you've busted your controller and made more problems for yourself. On the other hand, expressing an opinion doesn't necessarily mean people are angry and butthurt, I think most people just hang out here to be sociable.
True enough, it's just anecdotally speaking it seems when veterans are involved in what they view as "harming their honor" they get so worked up. Of course 95% of the veterans I know are former Infantry Marines, so perhaps there is a bit more bitterness amongst that particular group. My Question is why does the OP want to know what is and isn't considered a Marine? Does he want to put a stop to his brother in law's behavior? If so why? Really at the end of the day is his brother in law harming anyone? Let him be moto about however many weeks. It confounds me that my fellow vets rage out over these things and get into heated arguments over t-shirts and the like. All that internalized anger ain't helpful or healthy.
P.S. I knew what you were doing, I was just being pedantic .
IF he wont stop after repeatedly talking to him, then leave it alone.
What he does has not bearing on your status as a Veteran or the benefits you receive. Everyone on this board know how I feel about the Stolen Valor witch hunt, but I honestly think it is something people need to no get defensive over. He is your In-law, so you just gotta let it go.
Smacks wrote: Yeah, I'm sorry, I was being facetious (or whatever the inverse of facetious is). I do agree with you that getting angry about stuff often doesn't help. I've seen people do things like smash their controller when they lose at a game. It's a really dumb behaviour, because firstly games are supposed to be fun, and secondly, now you've busted your controller and made more problems for yourself. On the other hand, expressing an opinion doesn't necessarily mean people are angry and butthurt, I think most people just hang out here to be sociable.
True enough, it's just anecdotally speaking it seems when veterans are involved in what they view as "harming their honor" they get so worked up. Of course 95% of the veterans I know are former Infantry Marines, so perhaps there is a bit more bitterness amongst that particular group. My Question is why does the OP want to know what is and isn't considered a Marine? Does he want to put a stop to his brother in law's behavior? If so why? Really at the end of the day is his brother in law harming anyone? Let him be moto about however many weeks. It confounds me that my fellow vets rage out over these things and get into heated arguments over t-shirts and the like. All that internalized anger ain't helpful or healthy.
P.S. I knew what you were doing, I was just being pedantic .
Perhaps one reason would be that he, as a stated Air Force vet has been slighted by other family members because this "marine" attempted to serve in a more military branch?? I mean, you know as well as I do, that we tend to have a bit of banter and dick measuring contests between the branches. There could very well be familial discord or pressure put on him.
I know it's been mentioned in other, similar threads that getting a 10% discount for military service, when you did not actually serve (as in, you don't actually have veteran status according to the military and/or VA) has been, in some legal jurisdictions ruled to be considered fraud. So there is that.
And honestly, I aint mad or angry about this.... There's plenty other things related to being a veteran that is worthy of my anger than this.
Smacks wrote: Yeah, I'm sorry, I was being facetious (or whatever the inverse of facetious is). I do agree with you that getting angry about stuff often doesn't help. I've seen people do things like smash their controller when they lose at a game. It's a really dumb behaviour, because firstly games are supposed to be fun, and secondly, now you've busted your controller and made more problems for yourself. On the other hand, expressing an opinion doesn't necessarily mean people are angry and butthurt, I think most people just hang out here to be sociable.
True enough, it's just anecdotally speaking it seems when veterans are involved in what they view as "harming their honor" they get so worked up. Of course 95% of the veterans I know are former Infantry Marines, so perhaps there is a bit more bitterness amongst that particular group. My Question is why does the OP want to know what is and isn't considered a Marine? Does he want to put a stop to his brother in law's behavior? If so why? Really at the end of the day is his brother in law harming anyone? Let him be moto about however many weeks. It confounds me that my fellow vets rage out over these things and get into heated arguments over t-shirts and the like. All that internalized anger ain't helpful or healthy.
P.S. I knew what you were doing, I was just being pedantic .
Perhaps one reason would be that he, as a stated Air Force vet has been slighted by other family members because this "marine" attempted to serve in a more military branch?? I mean, you know as well as I do, that we tend to have a bit of banter and dick measuring contests between the branches. There could very well be familial discord or pressure put on him.
I know it's been mentioned in other, similar threads that getting a 10% discount for military service, when you did not actually serve (as in, you don't actually have veteran status according to the military and/or VA) has been, in some legal jurisdictions ruled to be considered fraud. So there is that.
And honestly, I aint mad or angry about this.... There's plenty other things related to being a veteran that is worthy of my anger than this.
He is being untruthful through omission.
He is trying to puff himself up where his "you are not a marine" but he had not got past bootcamp somehow trumps your active duty... unlike his inactive duty.
2) From a Marines standpoint, Is he a marine
Not getting past bootcamp I would figure no.
3) What to do about it.
I would say that if he likes the perks so much, how about he does something about earning them?
Failing that, you may have to refer to him as "bootcamp dropout" for a while until he gets the idea.
4) Am I being overly salty and blowing the situation out of proportion?
You participated in active duty, he didn't get his boots wet.
This farce he is doing is disrespecting the people who actually had done the service for their country, he is a leach.
The guy made every effort to NOT be a marine.
Now he lives, breaths and eats "looking like a marine"??
People earn "labels" for a reason.
You get belts for various levels of skill in martial arts.
Mechanical Engineers get an iron ring.
Anything requiring great skill, determination and practice has their symbols to identify those people.
Your brother-in-law is wearing those symbols and have not earned them.
He devalues other's achievements by falsely laying claim to them.
I am rather angry with him.
I have a deep respect for those able to put themselves in harm's way.
I play many a game of toy soldiers but make no illusions that I am some general or am some participant in military practice.
I think you should point him out to a "real" marine if the guy has the gall to show up to the cenotaph in uniform on Remembrance Day.
A revolution is an idea which has found its bayonets.
Napoleon Bonaparte
Something I take away from thinking about DrNo172000's posts is, if you are angry about X then own that it is YOU who are angry about X rather than trying to justify it by saying you are angry on someone else's behalf (e.g., all veterans or something). For me, it is easier to put into perspective what I am angry about once I look at it rationally as my problem, only to realize that sometimes I am actually angry about something that is not "my problem" in any real sense, or maybe to see what the real problem could be. I think Ensis Ferrae kind of brought this up, but perhaps the military aspect of this is just a surface layer to a dysfunctional personal relationship. So rather than being about people at large, this is really about two specific people who don't get along.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/11/08 22:03:36
Manchu wrote: Something I take away from thinking about DrNo172000's posts is, if you are angry about X then own that it is YOU who are angry about X rather than trying to justify it by saying you are angry on someone else's behalf (e.g., all veterans or something). For me, it is easier to put into perspective what I am angry about once I look at it rationally as my problem, only to realize that sometimes I am actually angry about something that is not "my problem" in any real sense, or maybe to see what the real problem could be. I think Ensis Ferrae kind of brought this up, but perhaps the military aspect of this is just a surface layer to a dysfunctional personal relationship. So rather than being about people at large, this is really about two specific people who don't get along.
The phrase "You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your family", also extends to "You can't pick your wife's family." Her brother is an insecure d-bag and there is nothing at all you can do about it.
My advice is to let it go. You know he is a poser, and you get to plow his sister. You win.
We were once so close to heaven, St. Peter came out and gave us medals; declaring us "The nicest of the damned".
“Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'”
Manchu wrote: Something I take away from thinking about DrNo172000's posts is, if you are angry about X then own that it is YOU who are angry about X rather than trying to justify it by saying you are angry on someone else's behalf (e.g., all veterans or something). For me, it is easier to put into perspective what I am angry about once I look at it rationally as my problem, only to realize that sometimes I am actually angry about something that is not "my problem" in any real sense, or maybe to see what the real problem could be. I think Ensis Ferrae kind of brought this up, but perhaps the military aspect of this is just a surface layer to a dysfunctional personal relationship. So rather than being about people at large, this is really about two specific people who don't get along.
The phrase "You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your family", also extends to "You can't pick your wife's family." Her brother is an insecure d-bag and there is nothing at all you can do about it.
My advice is to let it go. You know he is a poser, and you get to plow his sister. You win.
Manchu wrote: perhaps the military aspect of this is just a surface layer to a dysfunctional personal relationship. So rather than being about people at large, this is really about two specific people who don't get along.
You may be right that it may be a personal issue between two people so some anger may be there in the background.
To seek some "perspective" when feeling overly sensitive to this person possibly being a "poser" of a marine may be a legitimate question in their mind.
I have my own personal experiences with people who feel entitled to things they did not earn so can get all fired up on the topic so we each can find our own axe to grind in the topic.
The USA is about to elect a new president.
"President" is a fine name with great meaning.
Many people right now are wrestling with their thoughts of which candidate is to be president, no matter how inappropriate either may appear for the title.
Our symbols and ideals are precious to us.
It is painful to watch when an individual wraps themselves in the trappings of an ideal but fail to live by even one fundamental behavior associated with it.
Good luck OP, you may have to talk to the guy and have a heart to heart.
He may think pretending to be a marine is all he has for self-worth.
A revolution is an idea which has found its bayonets.
Napoleon Bonaparte
conker249 wrote: FIrst off a little about me. I served in the Air force as security forces for 6 years, been deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan each once. So I know what it means to me about serving our country. I wish my brother(in law) would understand this. He served 2 weeks in Marine Corps Basic training(he gave up claiming his knee hurt), He got to his 2nd week and after receiving a letter from his fiance to come home, he now claims he is hurt and after 2 months of med hold, comes home. Only to start working as a tower climber. Doesn't seem right to me to fall out because of knee problems, only to go into a job that is physically stressful. and now he considers himself a marine corps Veteran. Marpat pants, semper fi brotherhood shirt, Marine corps bracelet, belt buckle, 8 point marpat cover. Devil Dogs stickers on vehicle. Everyday he wears at least 2 of the above items it seems. He wears his dog tags as "proof of service" and people eat it up, and give him discounts with no ID, just see the tags and assume. When people ask him about where he was stationed at during small talk, he says He was stationed in San Diego(Marines Boot camp training site) and doesn't say more. It irritates me because I feel that he is only telling half of the story. I have talked about it to him, yelled about it to him, explained in public when he tries to do it. Nothing works. He thinks he is better than me since I was "only Air Force". Being a marine trumps my service apparently, and brings it up every so often.
So my questions are
1) Should I care that he is posing
2) From a Marines standpoint, Is he a marine
3) What to do about it.
4) Am I being overly salty and blowing the situation out of proportion?
I'm late to the party, but I have a very similar story.
My brother's dream was always to join the marines, even when he was a little kid.
Eventually, he got into basic for the marines, and he made it through about 2 months, but came down with some kind of major intestinal issue that caused him to be unable to continue, and he had to quit due to from what I understand to be a very significant medical issue.
Long story short, he never got back into basic. They said they'd give him another shot once he got better, but it never materialized for him. It was a great tragedy for him.
And he doesn't ham it up near as much as your BIL seems to, I don't think he gets any material gain, doesn't claim military veteran discounts at the movies or anything, but he definitely considers himself an ex-marine, and his friends have mentioned to me that, for example, he's a good shot 'because he was in the marines". (He is a good shot, btw).
Plus, he will sometimes introduce him as being former military / marine.
And........I don't think that's accurate. Being a marine was a big deal for him, and I am truly sad that he wasn't able to make it through basic, I'm sure not for lack of trying, but I still don't feel super-awesome about him claiming to be a former marine because I don't think he was, technically. But I guess I don't feel that it's a big enough deal to call him out on it.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/11/08 23:22:04
"Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment." Words to live by.
.
5000pts 
6000pts 
3000pts
