Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

It seems the time is nearly here for a new Tau codex

http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/512548.page

Ah it seems like only yesterday we were mocking the Tau crisis suits for their Rob Liefeld like proprotions and boxy designs.

So here are my made up Tau rumors...

1-In keeping with the proud tradition of the Storm Talon and Chibi Hawk well-known and beloved Tau models from Forge World will NOT be remade in plastic nor included in the codex. Instead the codex will include some ill-concieved poorly shoe-horned new models that were churned out over the weekend by an intern (oops, that one might be true).

2-Etherials will get a new transport, a Tau truck which can become a Crisis Suit and combine with 4 other Crisis Suits to form a mega Crisis Titan. This new transport is said to be optimal and is the prime means for getting Etherials around.

3-A new special character Lao T'sue will reveal that the Tau you can see are not the true Tau, the Tau you can write in a book are not the true Tau. Unfortunately only a handful of philosophy majors will get the joke.

4-The existing Crisis and Hazard suits will be joined by a new class of Calamity Suits which are monsterous creatures. Fire Warriors will be able to upgrade to Misfortune Suits which offer a 3+ save.

5-For the first time the Water Caste will be seen on the table top. Their Maritime Warriors will have a 3+ save, T4, and BS4. They will fire Pulse Bolts which are S4, AP5.

6-Tau were supposed to get a flier which could transform into a bird-like skimmer and then into a robotic crisis suit, but then it was scrapped because GW had already used the name Valkyrie.

7-In a surprise move the Demiurge finally appear as... nah just kidding. I can't even pretend this will happen.

8-Kroot Hounds and Kroot Hawks will be joined by new units including Kroot Swine, Kroot Gerbals and the dreaded Kroot Poodle.

9-There will be a new Hammer Head variant tank with a hull-mounted mega-ion cannon powered by two energy spheres hanging below its bulbous head. It will be called the Great White. Great Whites can be upgraded to Greater Blacks, which have twice the power. Great Whites may only be sold to players 18 and older.

10-The exact meaning of the 'Greater Good' will be further spelled out with the addition of special characters Ma'o and Len-In.

11-People won't have anything to complain about.

1) We will see the first Tau female miniature of the last several years. It will feature such boobplate that all other factions/designers are shamed. Also, she will have hooves.

2) Tau are all now nine feet tall, have head-tails, and have given up their technology and have "gotten back to basics", living in natural (and au natural) communes in the forested regions of their homeworlds. Incidentally, a single Firewarrior can now tear a Terminator Squad apart in CC with his (or her, see above) bare hands.

3) All Tau tanks have also been recycled. They now ride carnivorous Kroot Kats into battle. Fliers have been replaced by Kroot Dragon-Bird-Things.

Would a kroot poodle be a... kroodle?

There will be a new chariot skimer piloted by an etherial. It will be armed with 3 DCCWs and have the ability to vector strike.

All Team Leaders will have the ability to purchase a power sword for 15 points.

Kroot Rifles will gain a melee statline of +2 str, +1A, unwieldy, and Ap6.

All plasma weaponry will gain Gets hot.

The Price of Failure will now give Fearless as well as preferred enemy and furious charge, but each turn effected units must retake the Ld test. If they fail the unit takes D6 str4 AP2 hits as various members commit suicide.

Etherials will have the option to purchase a battlesuit. It will have only honor blades.

GW will realize that Tau are worthless and the entire race will have been obliterated by Sisters of Battle, so all the complainers that SOBs get butchered at every turn will have something to be happy about. The Sisters will then realize that the Tau were a creation by the God-Emperor and will all commit themselves to be Khorne's brood-sows, thus making the Grey Knight Bloodtide issue completely relevant and the world will move on.

The new book will focus solely on Kroot and Vespids.


*excerpt stolen from Mat Ward's personal diary with Hello Kitty cover.
love stains on the pages were omitted.

Tau figured out that lasguns make great laser sights, every Tau weapons is now Twin-Linked.

 Kid_Kyoto wrote:

1-In keeping with the proud tradition of the Storm Talon and Chibi Hawk well-known and beloved Tau models from Forge World will NOT be remade in plastic nor included in the codex. Instead the codex will include some ill-concieved poorly shoe-horned new models that were churned out over the weekend by an intern (oops, that one might be true).

That one could be very true. (stares intensely at the DA flyer)

6-Tau were supposed to get a flier which could transform into a bird-like skimmer and then into a robotic crisis suit, but then it was scrapped because GW had already used the name Valkyrie.

my rumor says its not scrapped, only changed to The Unseen.

Tau gain new allies in the form of Squats.

All Tau are in the service of Khaela Mensha Khaine, and every second battlesuit can be upgraded to an Avatar of the Bloody Handed Good.

Zoats make a return as another ally of the Tau.

That little hint that Eldar had a hand in Tau evolution and created the Ethereals is confirmed as true and every race knows it.

That little hint that the Emperor created the Tau is also confirmed as true.

The Emperor is now an Eldar God and pilots a Tau battlesuit.

All the good battlesuits and dfire warriors were busy on the behemoth front, and now that its diverted, we will start seeing troops armed with rail assualt rifles. The Battlesuits will have 10 markerlights, and railguns will autopen a landraider

I don't have a major rumor at the moment, sadly, but I have to say...

 Kid_Kyoto wrote:


3-A new special character Lao T'sue will reveal that the Tau you can see are not the true Tau, the Tau you can write in a book are not the true Tau. Unfortunately only a handful of philosophy majors will get the joke.

Guffaw

EXCLUSIVE TO DAKKA, PICS OF THE NEW X-32 STEALTH SUITS!



As you can see these are a fantastic improvement on the current models!

The new tau x-32 suits are released, they don't sell enough as they only have cc weapons and cost £89.

Then GW faq's them to have 32" range str 8 ap2 torrent flamers...
They become GW's most popular model.

Big news!
Tau is getting a 15 twinlinked railgun array platform with the ability to intercept, skyfire and has shrouded and a 4++ invul save.
And costs only 150 points!

One of my friends is a playtester, and says that firewarriors are getting a close combat option!

And there is in fact a demiurg hq.

Finally, we can now ally with nids on a battlebrother basis!

Mantas are now a mandatory choice, but to reflect this have had a 90% reduction in cost

 Flinty wrote:
Mantas are now a mandatory choice, but to reflect this have had a 90% reduction in cost

I wouldn't mind fielding a Manta if it's price cost is reduced 90%~
I heard that Manta's are now 200 points only!

Extra rumor just came in, Crsis suits can now ride Kroot Monsters!

Water caste cavalry will be present riding giant devilfish. Not the transport but actual devilfish that can swim through the air. Much confusion over upgrades to devilfish and 'make take a devilfish' will ensue.

All tau will be BS8 minimum because they only ever shoot. They get WS0 to balance it.

The XV 'OVR' 9000 has lazors that need to charge but then hit for 9000 wounds on a unit that wound on a 2+ AP1

Tau are getting the space guppy.

A group of Terran tourists with an oddly colored space-van stop Aun'Va's mysterious scheme, pulling off his latex mast to reveal Horus who exclaims he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those damn kids and their mechanical dog...

I got some more rumors from a guy who once changed planes in England so you know he's got the inside scoop!

34 - The secret of who created the Ethereals is finally reviled! It was the Eldar!

35 - Rail guns now have a 120" inch range but the shot passes through everything in the way! So you draw a 120" line across the battle field with the round hitting everything under it! They even pass through terrain like hills!

36 - The secret of who created the Ethereals is finally reviled! It was the Emperor!

37 - At last we learn why the Tau can ally with Ultramarines. It seems this one time Calgar and Farsight were at a Wargear convention in Space Vegas and they got to doing Jello shots and next thing you know they wake up together in the Honeymoon Suite.

38 - The secret of who created the Ethereals is finally reviled! It was the Illuminati!

39 - Tau get their first all female unit with Water Caste cadets. Dressed in pleated miniskirts and white blouses with wide collars their Cell Phone Sonic Attacks are the bane of light infantry.

40 - The secret of who created the Ethereals is finally reviled! It was the Necrons!

41 - We finally meet the Tau Emperor! Tauius T Tau XXIII! He has WS2, BS2 and is armed with a close combat weapon!

42 - The secret of who created the Ethereals is finally reviled! It was the Slann!

43 - In a surprise move Aun'Va retires to a monestary. A council of Ethereals is convened to choose a new Master of the Undying Spirit. They choose Fra'Nsis an humble Ethereal from the Galactic South.

44 - The secret of who created the Ethereals is finally reviled! It was Orkemedies!

 Kid_Kyoto wrote:

41 - We finally meet the Tau Emperor! Tauius T Tau XXIII! He has WS2, BS2 and is armed with a close combat weapon!

An OPTION for a close combat weapon you mean. We care about balance.

In typical GW fasion in order to sell more models, all Tau will be minimum of 24 man squads and kits will only sell 10 men squads

I walked past Phil Kelly and Jeremy Vetock on my way to the bar at forgeworld...

All tau plastic kits will be changed to finecast.
Tau will be getting a random 'no access to the warp' chart.
Tau will be changed to T4, have a 3+ and a bolgun. The blue skin is replaced with blue armour.
Tau will get a character called m'neus calamari.
They will get a new ethereal called A'dmi Ral Aa'ckbar - he seizes the initiative on a 2+, due to his finely honed enemy force detecting skills.

PredaKhaine wrote:
due to his finely honed trap detecting skills.

Fixed.

Apparently there is a new special rule the which relates to the Greater Good, at the beginning of the game you roll a D6, on a 6 your opponents army are now under the protection of the Tau and the Tau player is declared winner. I've heard that this doesn't affect Tyranids though, i've also heard that Tyranids are the next codex released after Tau.

From an anonymous email I have send to faeit212:
Tau release in May.
WD Codex only. Only 100 copies printed. Comes with a free perfume called "Ethereal".
In December, a new 40k supplement will be released that changes 3 point costs. Released in French only. Extremely limited.
Tau are revealed to be a rabid xenophobic faschist race like everyone else, that's why they are battlebrothers with Ultramarines now.
Tau get a Kroot monster on oval base, a Hulk in an odd pose with a Krootox head and weird Trish-sculpted triangles on the skin (fur?).
Tau get a new cc unit: Catgirl schoolgirls with katanas! A ninja turtle HQ makes them standard.
The rumour on Lao T'sue is wrong: Mat Ward wrote the Codex.
Tau get access to the Dark Talon. Why? Because it costs 75$ and sales are low.
Here a first pic of the new Tau ubersuit:

 Kroothawk wrote:
From an anonymous email I have send to faeit212:

Spoiler:

Not enough engrish for faeit.

54 - Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII has his own war lord table with results including upgrading one unit to WS3, or giving one unit rending CC weapons.

55 - Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII has been in a power struggle with the Space Pope for many light years, he finally got the upper hand by vowing to lead all Tau armies personally.

56 - Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII is a mandatory HQ choice and costs 250 points. All Tau armies must take Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII.

57 - Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII is mail order only, Finecast and is $85.95 (AUS$216.99)

58 - Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII has 3 wounds but is only toughness 2 due to years spent behind a desk.

59 - If Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII dies all Tau units must move 24" and assault the nearest enemy unit.

60 - To show his courage, Emperor Taoius T Tao XXIII must always be deployed out of cover within LOS of the enemy.

The Tau will realize that their policy of "peace" during expansion is just hindering their progress, so they turn to more aggressive tactics. Instead of having elegant weapons, they take inspiration from the Imperium and Orks, and turn their Devilfish into gunboats. Burst Cannon? More like Shred Cannon. S6 AP5 Heavy 20 Rending. Rail guns? Pretty cool, but now fully automatic. S10 AP1 Heavy 5. And instead of being Twin Linked, they are treated as separate weapons, meaning 10 S10 AP1 shots.

Also, they decide being blue commie fish is stupid, so they pull an Ed Gein and cut people's faces off to wear as a mask.