PETA vs. Starcraft vs. the Internet

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**KalashnikovMarine**

A little face palm worthy, but what's better is the response from this gaming website:

http://hothardware.com/News/PETA-Advocates-HumanZerg-Understanding-We-Go-OnLocation-For-Frontline-Marine-Opinions/

....When we asked Staff Sergeant Frank Sims, a longtime Raynor compatriot and veteran of many conflicts, whether he thought Zerglings had been mistreated, he grunted and handed us the following diagram. We later learned that Raynor's Raiders had recovered the drawing on Char, during the initial conflict with the Overmind, but had withheld widespread publication due to concerns about troop morale. "The problem with explaining zerglings to these tsetse flies" Sims growled, "Is that they've got no frame of reference. They think a zergling is like a Terran animal -- that if you raise 'em up right, you can train out the aggressive instincts, or keep their mandibles trimmed, or something like that. But zergs don't work that way. A Zergling," the grizzled sergeant continued, "is capable of killing its prey 32 distinct ways. It's teeth are strong enough to carve through titanium and its bite can dent starship armor. Zergling drool can bore through a country ham in 3.2 seconds, and it can survive on a tenth the oxygen a human needs. Worst of all, millennia of evolution have eliminated anything like an emotionally stable Zergling -- these critters spawn pissed off, and things don't improve from there."...."

**Soladrin**

Wait.. wat?

**KalashnikovMarine**

PETA thinks we need to be nicer to vidya game animals.

**Doomhunter**

KalashnikovMarine wrote:
PETA thinks we need to be nicer to vidya game animals.

I fail to see how the zerg count as "animals"

**KalashnikovMarine**

Doomhunter wrote:
KalashnikovMarine wrote:
PETA thinks we need to be nicer to vidya game animals.

I fail to see how the zerg count as "animals"

Assuming a reality that the Zerg exist? They'd be animals sames as everything else including us to use the loose definition of "living thing that isn't a plant" otherwise I suppose PETA just wants us to be nicer then clouds of pixels.

Automatically Appended Next Post:
Course their whole line of hippy "commune with the animals" malarkey falls apart under similar circumstances in the real world, not to say hordes of killer super predators, but more when faced with a predator, he who tries to co-exist with the animals gets eaten. For reference see "The Grizzly Man" or that girl who just got eaten by a lion in California.

**Chongara**

The difference between the Zerg and say, Chickens is that chickens are neither inclined nor capable of destroying all life on a given planet. The zerg are both.

**Grey Templar**

Chongara wrote:
The difference between the Zerg and say, Chickens is that chickens are neither inclined nor capable of destroying all life on a given planet. The zerg are both.

If chickens were much bigger than they are now, they'd be a top predator. They'll eat anything they can catch and kill. Chickens are vicious predators.

I am being 100% serious.

If a strain of chickens was developed that was 4 ft tall and weighed around 50 pounds they'd be dangerous as dogs.

And on the topic at hand, my money is on the internet. nobody ever beats the internet.

**Melissia**

Is this a thing which is real, or is it a joke that you guys have fallen for?

**CthuluIsSpy**

You know, I'd really hate to see PETA's reaction to my general treatment of dogs in video games.

Because I fething hate Video game dogs. Seriously, they are the worst type of enemy in my opinion.

**Ovion**

Grey Templar wrote:
Chongara wrote:
The difference between the Zerg and say, Chickens is that chickens are neither inclined nor capable of destroying all life on a given planet. The zerg are both.

If chickens were much bigger than they are now, they'd be a top predator. They'll eat anything they can catch and kill. Chickens are vicious predators.

I am being 100% serious.

If a strain of chickens was developed that was 4 ft tall and weighed around 50 pounds they'd be dangerous as dogs.

And on the topic at hand, my money is on the internet. nobody ever beats the internet.

You already get 3ft tall chickens.
But yeah.... moving on.

Melissia wrote:Is this a thing which is real, or is it a joke that you guys have fallen for?

It's real, Peta does this sort of thing a lot.

I actually kinda hope this will be a game, because Pokemon Black and Blue was hilarious (Though probably for the opposite reasons PETA wanted.

).

**LordofHats**

I actually kinda hope this will be a game, because Pokemon Black and Blue was hilarious (Though probably for the opposite reasons PETA wanted. ).

Seconded. PETA is the gift that keeps on giving.

**Cave_Dweller**

PETA: People for the Eating of Tasty Animals!

**Cheesecat**

Melissia wrote:
Is this a thing which is real, or is it a joke that you guys have fallen for?

Yeah, it looks like a joke to me.

**Grey Templar**

Cheesecat wrote:
Melissia wrote:
Is this a thing which is real, or is it a joke that you guys have fallen for?

Yeah, it looks like a joke to me.

It could be a joke, but unlikely. PETA has done equally silly things with video games before. Remember Super Meat Boy?

**Sir Pseudonymous**

It says "T.E.T.Z. A PETA Parody" at the bottom. Of course, that's ambiguously worded: it could be a parody of them, or it could be a parody by them. Either way, someone is making a joke here.

**KalashnikovMarine**

Grey Templar wrote:
Chongara wrote:
The difference between the Zerg and say, Chickens is that chickens are neither inclined nor capable of destroying all life on a given planet. The zerg are both.

If chickens were much bigger than they are now, they'd be a top predator. They'll eat anything they can catch and kill. Chickens are vicious predators.

I am being 100% serious.

If a strain of chickens was developed that was 4 ft tall and weighed around 50 pounds they'd be dangerous as dogs.

.

Have you ever meet an even passingly irate goose?

**Grey Templar**

Yeah, I raise geese. And geese are definitly dangerous, especially the big african meat strains. Those suckers can be upwards of 5-6 ft.

And never EVER mess with a mother goose, or duck for that matter. We had a little silkie duck that would just murder your leg if you came near her nest.

**KalashnikovMarine**

Geese are terrifying fethers when they're mad, swans too. Those are big angry birds.

**Coolyo294**

My sister got bit by an angry mother goose once. It was pretty funny.

**Grey Templar**

Handeled a Black Swan once. Neck a mile long

That thing could bite you from a different Zip code.

One of my Sebastopol's got me on the nose once. It was pretty funny, after the bleeding stopped.

**Amaya**

I don't believe this is real.

Or at the very least, it's not serious. I really hope not. Someone needs to be slapped if this is serious. As in bruised cheek, teeth knocked loose, possibly knocked unconscious, kung fu pimp hand slapped.

**Grey Templar**

Amaya wrote:
I don't believe this is real.

Or at the very least, it's not serious. I really hope not. Someone needs to be slapped if this is serious. As in bruised cheek, teeth knocked loose, possibly knocked unconscious, kung fu pimp hand slapped.

Even if not, slap em anyway

**SagesStone**

I've seen slightly crazier from them.

**Dreadclaw69**

I always thought that PETA were beyond parody

After their attempt to take on Assassin's Creed I thought they would have given up on this type of campaign - http://www.idigitaltimes.com/articles/15913/20130312/assassin-creed-4-black-flag-ubisoft-epic.htm

"Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" is one of the most highly anticipated release dates in the video game industry, but as fans wait for the game to finally touch their fingertips, others are taking an opportunity to be extremely critical of the franchise. In the latest controversy involving "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag," the experts behind the game have been attacked for incorporating "whaling" into the gameplay.

"Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" is at the center of the latest campaign from the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), who emphasizes humane solutions to animal problems in urban and rural areas. For the uninitiated, PETA is known for its over-the-top rallies and responses to animal cruelty and unfavorable treatment of animals. PETA has a long-running rivalry with video game developers. Most recently, PETA called out Pokémon for encouraging children to catch and imprison animals. Now, it looks like PETA is settings its sites on the game developers at Ubisoft.

PETA has targeted "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" in its latest campaign seeking to inform the public about the atrocities committed against animals around the world. In the non-profit's latest written statement, it attacks the creators of the Assassin's Creed franchise for encouraging whaling. Here's exactly what PETA said about "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag":

"Whaling-that is, shooting whales with harpoons and leaving them to struggle for an hour or more before they die or are hacked apart while they are still alive-may seem like something out of the history books, but this bloody industry still goes on today in the face of international condemnation, and it's disgraceful for any game to glorify it. PETA encourages video game companies to create games that celebrate animals-not games that promote hurting and killing them."

Oddly enough, PETA has a point about the whaling issue. Whaling was banned in 1986 by the International Whaling Commission. Whaling essentially pushed the species to the brink of extinctions, so several International organizations banded together in order to enact a ban on commercial whaling. MTV Multiplayer reports that players of "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" will be allowed to virtually harpoon whales.

"While on your ship, you'll also have the option to harpoon ocean creatures," reports Alan Danzis of MTV Multiplayer. "I practically screamed out, 'Am I gonna hunt a whale?' during the preview. 'Yes,' the developer told me."

Ubisoft, a game development company that has some of the most talented writers and designers on the planet, promptly responded to the accusations made by PETA. Here's exactly what Ubisoft said in response to PETA's attack against them:

"History is our playground in Assassin's Creed ... Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag is a work of fiction that depicts the real events during the Golden Era of Pirates. We do not condone illegal whaling, just as we don't condone a pirate lifestyle of poor hygiene, plundering, hijacking ships, and over-the-legal-limit drunken debauchery."

"And even if the game does glorify whaling - as it certainly glorifies the life of a pirate - I don't think it will lead to a generation of gamers who head to the Caribbean to hunt down humpbacks. Just as I don't think anyone who played the previous Assassin's Creed games have found employment as a murderer for hire."

The "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" release date is still a long way away, but fans of the franchise are eagerly anticipating the next release. The new Assassin's Creed game will have several features that were never included in other versions of the game. Of all the new features, multiplayer mode is one of the most highly anticipated. As you might suspect, multiplayer mode is also one of the most closely guarded secrets about the game. There's still no indication as to how the multiplayer mode will work, or, how it will fit into the standard story.

For anyone that bothered to play "Assassin's Creed 3," the next version of the game will be nearly identical to the first portion of AC3. You'll be playing as a pirate, and the storyline is completely separate from the Desmond storyline that took place over the last three games. This time, you'll be playing as yourself, similar to the way that the PlayStation Vita version of "Assassin's Creed: Liberation" worked. The game will host a variety of sea battles and allow players to climb up a wide variety of contraptions and elements on each boat.

Fans of the "Assassin's Creed" franchise have been begging for a pirate game for several years. When the development team at Ubisoft began working on "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag," there was already a strong magnetism flowing toward building a pirate video game. "We have a fantastic opportunity for pirates in video games," said lead content manager Carsten Myhill in an interview with MCVUK.com. "Certainly when Assassin's Creed III naval came out, there was a clamor from the fans for a pirate game. There's no-doubt that the people want it."

"But it's not easy. It takes a very talented team, a lot of experience and great tech. It's one thing having good naval combat, but combining that with good boarding and land-based gameplay in a seamless way, is hard to do," he added.

""We're staying away from clichés. Things like walking the plank, parrots on the shoulder and hooks for hands. We are giving pirates the HBO, reality treatment. And that allows us to redefine piracy in entertainment. No longer is it for kids," he said.

"Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" will be released on the PlayStation 4, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Wii U, and PC. There's also a strong chance that it will be included in the Xbox 720. The developers of the game have implicitly said that there will not be a version of the game coming to the PlayStation Vita, but as time passes, we wouldn't be surprised if the game was inevitably ported to portable devices such as the PlayStation Vita. The "Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag" release date is scheduled for October 29, 2013.

**Perkustin**

Shouldnt peta be happy we are hunting and mistreating virtual animals? Afterall AFAIK there is no link between Vidjagame violence and real violence

Also zerg are not at all comparable to terrestrial animals.(basing this off the fact they are tyranid ripoffs btw. I don't know SC lore) They are organic weapons controlled by a fully self concious, and homicidal, hive mind. Any cruelty and murdering of them is done purely in self defense by the virtual terran/protoss soldiers.

**Cave_Dweller**

I'm just waiting for Michael Vick's Dog Fighting Simulator 2013 to come out!

Edit: also really looking forward to Whaling Simulator 2014.

**flamingkillamajig**

Melissia wrote:
Is this a thing which is real, or is it a joke that you guys have fallen for?

I thought 'PETA Parody' was pretty clear in the picture though it seems nobody seems to get it. It was in the freaking title picture ffs. Learn to read before you post.

**MrMoustaffa**

To be fair, PETA has a good reason to protest the pokemon games.

I mean, think for a second. Really think about what you're doing in the pokemon games.

You

1. Poach creatures from their native habitat, sealing them up in pokeballs.

2. Many will spend the rest of their miserable lives rotting away on the hard drive of a PC, many will probably never see the light of day again.

3. The "lucky" ones are then hauled around, only getting fresh air when it's time for them to fight, or perform some miserable menial labor like push boulders, cut down trees, or be a living boat.

4. Many are forced to fight to the point of fainting, as well as being frozen, burned, electrocuted, pulverized, and cut with extremely sharp objects.

5. Others are traded away at will by their trainers on a whim, merely so they can continue their sick obsession of collecting as many pokemon as they can.

6. Some are even forced to evolve into new forms, or are even forced into selective breeding programs.

And who knows what kinds of irradiation they get exposed to with all of the experimental potions that are used on them and that weird table thing at pokecenters, as well as what the effects of being transported, stored, and repeatedly shifted from reality to "hyperspace"(whatever you call being in a pokeball) does to their biology. They could be getting exposed to all radiation and be developing horrible cancers or even become sterilized.

I mean yes, most games PETA rags on really have no reason to it, but Poke'mon can get really friggin dark when you start thinking about it.

**BlapBlapBlap**

Cave_Dweller wrote:
I'm just waiting for Michael Vick's Dog Fighting Simulator 2013 to come out!

Edit: also really looking forward to Whaling Simulator 2014.

Oh god, the physics, the textures...

EET BURNZ.

**Soladrin**

flamingkillamajig wrote:
Melissia wrote:
Is this a thing which is real, or is it a joke that you guys have fallen for?

I thought 'PETA Parody' was pretty clear in the picture though it seems nobody seems to get it. It was in the freaking title picture ffs. Learn to read before you post.

And a quick google will tell you that this is real because It's on peta's own website. It's like you people don't have internet.