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Made in us
Old Sourpuss






Lakewood, Ohio

The trick to that game is to work on freeing your dominant hand so that you can do things like take a leak... so many try and fail because they wish to go at both of them at the same time.

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Made in gb
Stalwart Space Marine





Just remembered, there was also a time where I went to draw £50 from the cash machine I took my card out walked away without remembering the cash and only realised the next morning, needless to say I was gutted.

There was also a time where I bought a bottle of whisky from the local supermarket, I had to show my ID for approval, when I gave the lady the bottle to remove the anti opening lock on the lid to prevent theft, she typed in the approval process on the self checkout I was using then handed me back the bottle without taking the bottle lock, because I was distracted I just dumped it in the shopping bag without looking and carried on with my other items. When I got home I took the bottle out and noticed the protector was still on and thought to myself "well I'm not taking it back, they might think I've stolen it with the lock on and everything, not sure whether I still had the receipt or not either," So I just said to myself "feth it" and decided to do a bit of DIY on the bottle protector with a hammer. As a result, I ended up with about three shards of glass sticking out of my hand and bottles worth of wasted whisky on the floor. I should have just checked my pockets for the receipt and took it back.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2013/06/26 21:56:36


"You have enemies? Good! That means you stood up for something at some point in your life."  
   
Made in gb
Longtime Dakkanaut






The ruins of the Palace of Thorns

During the Japan/Korea world cup I was living in a small town in rural Japan. My mate was living in the next town over, which was even smaller. Quite literally everyone knew who we were, as we were the only two foreign guys for miles around...

So, after watching England win one of the group games in his apartment (Denmark, maybe? Poland?) we started firing fireworks at each other. Whilst still in his apartment.

Later, we went out onto the main street and started doing old-fashioned duelling with them. Back-to-back, 10 paces, etc...

Obviously, this resulted in all of the locals shouting out of their windows at us, knowing who we were, etc...

I still own the T-shirt I was wearing. It has numerous burn holes in it, and we had to spend a long time cleaning the burn marks off of the walls in his apartment.

It is miraculous that we neither started a serious fire nor seriously injured one another.

Dumbest thing I have ever done. Also one of the most fun. Not to be repeated though.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2013/06/26 21:56:50


Though guards may sleep and ships may lay at anchor, our foes know full well that big guns never tire.

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Decrepit Dakkanaut






Screwing around with a frag and tried to "John Wayne" the pin off. I say five years ago. So walking around still with the very front two top teeth chipped and always decline to have the chipped teeth smooth over. To remind me every morning not to do "stupid"

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Liverpool, England

Oh dear, narrowing this down is going to be difficult, so I'll settle for my favourite story of youthful mischief.
When I was about 15 there were road works being done on the central road of the suburb I have lived in my entire life, almost every car drives through this road, as it leads onto the main road towards the city centre and other key parts.
Now, my best friend and I thought ourselves to be the good little pranksters, so we decided to rearrange all the barriers and traffic cones to close off the entire road at all junctions, rather than just a few little areas that needed potholes ect. filled.
This was possibly the greatest idea we'd ever had until we realised the next morning that my Dad couldn't drive us to school early and we held up half the year waiting for us to get there for the school trip that we'd payed a fair bit of money for and quite wanted to go on. No one would talk to us all day, being late we ended up hitting the bad motorway traffic and we ended up losing about 2 and a half hours of the day, losing all free time outside of the planned lectures of the day.
What was looking to be a great day, ended awfully, all for the sake of a badly thought out prank.
   
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Fixture of Dakka





Melbourne

KingCracker wrote:Yea it's funny how you always feel that in the chest eh? Growing up a buddy of mine lived on a large dairy farm surrounded by electric fences. Well one day we were playing a game of football and I was open. His uncle tossed the ball high, I ran after it, caught it and then connected with one of those fences. From my momentum I flipped over the wire and was caught by my stomach and left dangling over this electrified wire zapping the gak out of me until I finally flopped off
For my, i think 11th birthday, my mum and dad took me and some friend to the Ballarat Wildlife Park, it's an open range reserve with non-deadly native animals that you can hand feed and whatnot. Anyway they don't really have fences or anything just the occational small electricfied wire setup to keep the Roos or Emus from going where they're not supposed to. Well my dad wasn't watching where he was going took one of these electric wires to the shin. He starts hopping about swearing and then trips over it again landing on it arse first. He said it felt like someone drove a dirtbike straight up his rear.

Mr Nobody wrote:A more recent one was I was waiting for a ride from my father when a stranger came up in the exact same car model I was waiting for. I jumped in and looked over at very confused old man and a dog. I promptly apologized, dashed out of the car and saw my father waiting a few cars down, laughing. The Ford Flex has become very popular apparently.
I did something similar to this. I had dashed into a shop to get something while my mum waited in the car. I come out a minute later to find a strange man sitting in the drivers seat asking me what i thought i was doing getting into his car. It was most embarressing. Turns out i need to be about 4 cars over to my right.

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playing hockey as a teen before making a cup, after one shot sans the cup, I called a time out to finish it and returned...
Never wore a helmet (and I was the goalie) or a mask, obscured my vision...

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Powerful Spawning Champion





Shred City.

The dumbest thing I've ever done in my entire life was when I was about 16, I just got my G1 (in Canada, it's the first level of license, all that's needed is a written exam with zero hands-on experience needed). I was driving with a family member who had their full license (as per the conditions of a G1) and when I went to go park in my driveway, I went in way too fast and smashed into my garage door. Not THAT hard, I managed to slow down significantly, but the garage door cracked. No damage to the car, and my passenger was a little shaken up. In about an hour the entire planet knew I did it and I was a laughing-stock for that entire year probably lol.

I had to split the cost with my parents to replace it as a punishment for reckless driving, but now you can be damn sure with almost 10 years of driving experience under my belt now I go into the driveway nice and sloooowly.
   
Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut





Spitsbergen

 Alfndrate wrote:
The trick to that game is to work on freeing your dominant hand so that you can do things like take a leak... so many try and fail because they wish to go at both of them at the same time.


You could dedicate an entire thread to stupid stories relating to just 40 hands.
   
Made in us
Old Sourpuss






Lakewood, Ohio

 rubiksnoob wrote:
 Alfndrate wrote:
The trick to that game is to work on freeing your dominant hand so that you can do things like take a leak... so many try and fail because they wish to go at both of them at the same time.


You could dedicate an entire thread to stupid stories relating to just 40 hands.


Except we'd never have to go past your post here .

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Stealthy Warhound Titan Princeps





South Wales

Say yes to requests.

Bite a large portion of my tongue off.

Cut the tip of a finger almost off.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2013/06/27 13:03:03


Prestor Jon wrote:
Because children don't have any legal rights until they're adults. A minor is the responsiblity of the parent and has no legal rights except through his/her legal guardian or parent.
 
   
Made in gb
Longtime Dakkanaut






Sheffield, City of University and Northern-ness

 Alfndrate wrote:
 rubiksnoob wrote:
 Alfndrate wrote:
The trick to that game is to work on freeing your dominant hand so that you can do things like take a leak... so many try and fail because they wish to go at both of them at the same time.


You could dedicate an entire thread to stupid stories relating to just 40 hands.


Except we'd never have to go past your post here .

Not me, but at a party a while back one of my freinds who was already slightly drunk was coerced into playing "Edward Absinthe-Hands", and you can probably imagine what this involved.

Considering that this guy is just over 5'4", and was using neat absinthe, it was rather stupid.

Surprisingly, he survived.

   
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Fixture of Dakka





Melbourne

What's 40 hands? A drinking game of some description im assuming.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2013/06/27 13:07:46


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Longtime Dakkanaut




St. Louis, Missouri

I dated a Redwings fan.

After that fact, all the other problems she had makes complete sense.

And if you're drinkin' well, you know that you're my friend and I say "I think I'll have myself a beer"
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Longtime Dakkanaut





Portugal

 Sir Samuel Buca wrote:
Oh dear, narrowing this down is going to be difficult, so I'll settle for my favourite story of youthful mischief.
When I was about 15 there were road works being done on the central road of the suburb I have lived in my entire life, almost every car drives through this road, as it leads onto the main road towards the city centre and other key parts.
Now, my best friend and I thought ourselves to be the good little pranksters, so we decided to rearrange all the barriers and traffic cones to close off the entire road at all junctions, rather than just a few little areas that needed potholes ect. filled.
This was possibly the greatest idea we'd ever had until we realised the next morning that my Dad couldn't drive us to school early and we held up half the year waiting for us to get there for the school trip that we'd payed a fair bit of money for and quite wanted to go on. No one would talk to us all day, being late we ended up hitting the bad motorway traffic and we ended up losing about 2 and a half hours of the day, losing all free time outside of the planned lectures of the day.
What was looking to be a great day, ended awfully, all for the sake of a badly thought out prank.


Helloooooo Karma!

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Executing Exarch






When I was a kid, we played 'spin the firework'.

Light it, spin it on the floor, then run like hell.

We also put one in a dog gak bin. It didn't go off, so we went back to check it...then it exploded when we were about 3 feet away. Cue more running.

Never play with fireworks.

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2013/06/27 14:22:50


 Blacksails wrote:

Its because ordinance is still a word.
However, firing ordinance at someone isn't nearly as threatening as firing ordnance at someone.
Ordinance is a local law, or bill, or other form of legislation.
Ordnance is high caliber explosives.
No 'I' in ordnance.
Don't drown the enemy in legislation, drown them in explosives.
 
   
Made in us
Old Sourpuss






Lakewood, Ohio

 Snrub wrote:
What's 40 hands? A drinking game of some description im assuming.


Pm'd due to content.

sorry if anyone considered my post tasteless

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2013/06/27 13:56:18


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Decrepit Dakkanaut






New Orleans, LA

NVM.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2013/06/27 13:48:32


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Perth/Glasgow

NVM

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2013/06/27 13:48:57


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Old Sourpuss






Lakewood, Ohio

Man two edited posts with a NVM, did I kill a kitten or something

I did edit my post, in case I was being tasteless, or in case I was giving kiddies ideas on things they shouldn't be doing. Sorry Dakka!

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Decrepit Dakkanaut






New Orleans, LA

Nah, I was asking what 40 hands was from the previous page and you answered it on this one.

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Old Sourpuss






Lakewood, Ohio

 kronk wrote:
Nah, I was asking what 40 hands was from the previous page and you answered it on this one.


And then I edited it away!

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Decrepit Dakkanaut






New Orleans, LA

No worries. Like everything else, if kiddos want to learn about something, they can just google it.

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Hulking Hunter-class Warmech




North West UK

 Alfndrate wrote:
Man two edited posts with a NVM, did I kill a kitten or something

I did edit my post, in case I was being tasteless, or in case I was giving kiddies ideas on things they shouldn't be doing. Sorry Dakka!


Well I had no idea what it was, but I was able to see before you edited it out of existence...

Now I know, and I have ideas Thanks

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 Ouze wrote:

Well, you don't stuff facts into the Right Wing Outrage Machine©. My friend, you load it with derp and sensationalism, and then crank that wheel.
 
   
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Decrepit Dakkanaut






New Orleans, LA

I used to play the same game with Jack Daniels bottles.



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Major




Fortress of Solitude

 Devoted-to-the-machine wrote:
stupidest thing I did was raychel


I see what you did there.

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Fixture of Dakka





Melbourne

Alfndrate wrote:Pm'd due to content.

sorry if anyone considered my post tasteless
Thanks for the PM, i'd never heard of that before. Now i've got something i can sucker my drunken friends into playing
Normally we end up playing rock, paper, scissors, slap. And I always end up losing.

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Decrepit Dakkanaut






Told the Chaplain I was a Pagan of the Bacchus variety. In dead seriousness. Almost lost my rank over that one.

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Stabbin' Skarboy





WHEREVA DA FIGHTIN IZ BEST

Stabbed myself with a pencil once, left about an inch deep hole in my hand- didn't draw a drop of blood somehow

being young and foolish i kicked a political yard sign once, got cought, blamed a friend for it- had to give im a twenty to get him to listen to an apology.

*skims over pirate phase briefly*

OOH! gave myself a concussion while running backwards once, slammed right into a light post i didnt see. Bloody head was sore for a week.

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Aspirant Tech-Adept





Age 12-13

Step one: Requisition a torpedo (explosive signalling device for railroad trains) from an unattended caboose parked in rail yard.

Pictures here

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Detonator_%28railway%29

(Please note that the statement in the Wiki that striking them with a hammer does not work, is in contradiction to my experience.)

Step two: Break torpedo into small pieces

Step three: Hit small piece with hammer

Result: Explosion sends hammer at about Mach 3 toward my head and barely misses me, deafening me for a couple of hours.

Life Lesson Learned from incredibly stupid and dangerous experiment. Dont steal explosive crap and mess around with it.

Seriously, kids are much safer staying inside and trolling the internet than hanging around rail yards, abandoned coal mines and scrap yards just looking for trouble to get into.

I must add that this is just the stupidist thing that comes to mind, it probably is not the stupidist thing ever, her name was Tracy.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2013/06/29 02:47:10


   
 
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