What the Gork or possibly Mork is going on here?!?

Orky timetravel?! That can't be good.. wait.. does that mean there's going to be spoilers? Uh oh..

So, Gruk'Og Nubgruk the Orky hero of our story ongoing up till now had met his demise and his end, he apparently was NOT unorky (undead) afterall!!
"Hey! How'd he survive that big fall then storkyteller!!" I hear you inquire internally, loudly..

Ah yes!, Well ofcourse Orks have two lives!!, One life from Gork or possibly Mork and one life from Mork or possibly Gork. His two lives now expunged meant there was only one more place to end up..

The dark, silent, soily pit of.. Orky reincarnation into another Ork!! Yay!!

-
200 B(efore)C(aptain Badrukk), a great stargate loomed over the wasteland where stealthily as ever the rad (Go) Kurg Kurg-bun, a mysterious loner on a mission hid his acrobaticly leen self against a big Ork shaped rock overseeing the premise. Above gleamed and crackled lasers in the clouds.. and he knew.. that soon another of those pesky Aeldari floppy spacecraft was going to emerge from the midst of his interest..

Guardians were loading supplies in and out of them, and Kurg knew that whatever came through had to come from a place of wealth. Where that wealth was didn't matter to Kurg, all he wanted was obtain something greater than his kin could cook up, to get back.. no matter what.. to that place deeply buried in a memory..

He knew this place to not be from the realm of imagination or dreams, it felt too real..
There was a many layered construction site of a tower of sorts, fire raining down from amidst his fellow, a great number of assailants.. and one of his own' yelling the words "MORK POLO" after which a group from above jumped a kamikaze attack onto their foes way below..

Something must've gone wrong in that fight.. for he woke up inbetween some baby squigs in a mushy forest.. wondering at first wether he himself was a squig.. but the baby squig leader was a wise wizard, a longbearded mini squig by the name of "Draathangeon the master of magick and most powerful grand and epicly ancient lord supreme over all creation and all creation to be and all creation to be after that, the third."

But Kurg had never met him, instead he met the frog faced older brother of the baby squigs that went by the name of "urhpjf" and he taught him over the span of about fifty years that Kurg was in fact an Ork.

It had taken much training and hardship to come to this conclusion, all the while Kurg every night dreaming the same dream.. of that which was unveiled above..

Now, Kurg had left the squig and was searching.. searching for a way to find a remnant of truth in this vision.. and after searching in many wrong places, among even his Orky kind.. to which other, much less interesting adventures were made, of which some concerned weirdboys holding unrelating ceremonies that did absolutely nothing for Kurg apart from annoying him to the point of killing the weirdboy..

No.. now he saw a glimmer of potential in the far superior technology before him.. this gate was certainly going to bring him to a place of technological connectivity! Something that would make a reality this vision of another life! Or at the least.. find its remains.

-

The wait was over, the plan was perfect.. Kurg would expertly rush down the slope, execute the Guardians and sneak right into the big portal emitted.. then find his way as he went..

20... 15.. 10.. 5.. go.. yub yub yub!!

Kurg let out a warcry and stealthily stomped down the slope, as the Guardians unstartled started firing at Kurg, missing him because they had rolled ones.
Kurg grabbed the necks of two guardians, bashed their heads together rolling two sixes, tripped over his unmade shoelaces rolling a 2, hit his own head against the left side of the gate rolling another 1 and while the rest of the Aeldari Guardians kept rolling ones he fell into the portal that luckily just in time opened for the transport ship..

-

10 Morky, possibly Gorky months later..

-

Kurg, now a seasoned' may I dare say expert' of the Webway crouched down onto his belly on top of a stone workplace floating on a landmass in twilight, as he watched below him spiky Aeldari administer power to some other Aeldari types crafts.. Deeper in a gate made out of rods of light obstructed him from obtaining the materials he sought.. aware that they had to be of a kind he had yet to understand.. but powerful enough to evolve everything he could build of Ork stature into a new paradigm.. He had his mind set on something gnarly, something allowing him to wade through these flimsy but numerous Aeldar populating the outstretch of this strange luminous dimension.

Ah.. they were leaving.. Kurg hopped down and looked at the gate in fron't of him, the bars made of light were emitting quite some heat.. it would probably be unwise to try and touch them..

Kurg took some dice out of his pocked and rolled.. two sixes..

The gate turned off.. lucky roll.

Kurg walked through, finding to his suprise an entire stash of technology just laying there for grabs, now.. to an Aeldari the tech would probably be considered scrap.. but to an Ork this stuff was more like scrap with his name on it!
Some of it looked quite heavy though, so Kurg had to select a few..

There was what seemed to be a partially broken battery cannister on which was written "Doomw", and a working stack of what seemed to be big rifle type things in a big box on which was inscribed "P Titan Pulsars"

Those did look way too heavy..

Instead he grabbed some smaller energy cells, what looked to be some sophisticated shield module and lastly two smaller gunthings from a shelve tagged "scatter".. after thinking to himself that the word scatter rhymed with better.

Kurg quickly made his way back out, dropped one of his dice trying to hold all the loot and it fell onto the ground with the number 1 up, Kurg therefor tripped again and stumbled off the edge of the floating landmass.. still holding all his obtained stuff tight to his chest, tumbling down into warpy vortex one after the other going all over..

-

300 trillion years into the future, a great war was fought against the Necron most formidable foe yet, known to all races as the greatest terror that had once been underestimated.. the SQUIG.

This race had evolved to such monsterous sizes, that even Tyranid hivefleet dared not to try to go near anylonger having been decimated into pockets from the onslaught themselves.

Among the Necron fought a mysterious rough cybORK known only to his Necron allies as "the Kork" having equated himself with Mork, possibly Gork. He hated all things Squig, because a long time ago.. way too long for ordinary mortals to possibly remember any detail of.. he somewhat did remember to have been tricked by Squigs having supposedly made him believe that he was an Ork.

Kork an Ork?.. No.. he was much more than an Ork!.. he was a Kork! Equal to Mork and possibly Gork!!.. or perhaps even.. Gork and possibly Mork!
The Necron's were glad to have him, and had allowed him to build whatever warmachine he wished from whatever parts were laying around..
Kork had no interest in Necron tech.. the day he had come to this world he had clutched to his chest a pair of guns, a bunch of energy cells and a module of a kind of sophisticated shield..

The Necron had some old salvaged Orky parts.. among which the remains of a Deffdread which Kork outfitted with his belongings. Therewith he had created a weapon to destroy all those who had dared to tell him that he was less than a Kork.

fighting the Squig terror for so long after.. he had earned his battlescars and foul wounds which the Necron's would then help turn into strengths.. which eventually made Kork a cybORK. (so that that's clear!!)

Now, the decicive battle was upon them.. Quazillions of Necron marched into the outstretched upward bending wastes meeting with the Septafragillions of descending Squigships blasting a path into billions of Necrons to land..

Among the backline Kork saw on the horizon how Squigs the size of planets, mounted with jetpacks the size of moons came down among them, making this fight rather onesided..

They probably also had septafragillions of dice rolling lots of sixes too.. ..

There was no hope for victory, no matter all the battles fought and won prior..

Kork took his last dice out of his pocket ..

Perhaps that one dice would grant Mork and possibly Gork to intervene.. or cause some sort of miracle.. if only he could roll a 6.. ..just one 6.. against the septafragillions of sixes being rolled in the distance.. Kork cried out as the ground rumbled and loud metallic creaks blasted from every billion of Necron slain collectively and instantaneously in the far distance..

He rolled..


4


Behind him opened a portal.. ..well.. that was convenient too Kork thought to himself, renouncing his name in shame.. and becoming Kurg oncemore.

-

On the other side he found himself in another wasteland, devoid of life..

Walking around in his Deffdread, armed with the exotic "scatters" and a module of a kind of sophisticated shield.. he wandered about for a while.. until he noticed sounds in the distance.. something clattering.. something popping.. and bopping..

Gunshots?

At the entrance of a canyon Kurg found a rockdrill.. finders keepers.. Kurg thought to himself.. and attached it to his Deff..
Entering the canyon Kurg found himself standing face to face with a small group of privateer dwarfs that looked like they were wrapped in plastic gear taking potshots at some straggling Tyranids that had obviously fled from yonder.. trying to outrun some kind of miasma..
Then, as the Tyranids passed .. the dwarfs inquired..

"What the vault o' ores is dat silvery lad up ther me mates.." pointing his gun right at Kurg..
"der mad lad ev'n stole un of er diamon.. drillzers.."

Kurg wondered wether these wrinkled little men were a sort of prehistoric Squigs.. and an anger boiled up in him oncemore..
Without even giving it another thought Kurg pulled a lever and pushed a few buttons..

Un-dwarfly screeches were emitted echoing loudly bouncing throughout the entire canyon as Kurg's scatter weapons zapped holes into the dwarfs accurately by its automated targetting systems..

..Kurg, now sitting comfier in his Deffdread ran on through the canyon and eventually.. at the end of it could make out in the distance a sight which he could only vaguely recognice as from the hazy suggestion of a long lost dream..

An utterly abandoned town out of concrete, and among these structures a a big concrete ruined building, mostly consisting of level plates and crumbled stairways leading up to them, five levels high. In fron't of it layed on the ground the remains of a gigantic Ork suited in an even bigger ..chemically burn't suit.. he was probably dead for no longer than a day..

The smell of copper lingered.. as Kurg came nearer.. there must've been a huge explosion, which destroyed all but the concrete itself..
He noticed some fully bleached bones near of a kind that could've only been Tyranid..

"Wuz lat?" (who are you?) A voice called from above.. sporting an almost fully skeletal guise..
"Lat nub klomp'd ad dis nuka choom rhir..?!" (you weren't killed in the nuke's destructive blaze?)
Kurg remembered the language, this was proper Orky..

"Ee come ere nuw.., nub wuz inda choom.." Kurg replied.. (I just came here, wasn't in this cataclysm)
"come up, meet da hai" (come up, meet the clan) the skeletal Ork called down..

Kurg climbed the scorched concrete stairway.. and at the top floor stood a whole bunch of skeletal orks waving to him.. among them an eerily familiar face.. holding a big sawblade..

"ee iz Ogtuuk Oothed.." the sawblade Ork introduced himself.." "lat join uz Orkhai, iz Nite Orks!'.. (I am Ogtuuk Oothed, you join our clan.. it is the Nite - Orks.)

Kurg the cybORK cried from his only functional eye.. because he knew the dream was true, and he had found a way to find his place of memory..
And so.. the story of Gruk'Og Nubgruk.. was renewed.

-Fin.