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P.G. Wodehouse wrote:If it were not for quotations, conversation between Gentlemen would consist of an endless succession of 'what-ho's!

This is an attempt to raise the tone of Dakkadakka in general. Be your quotes inspiring, be they warnings or be they smart arse answers to stupid statement, please post them up here.

Here's some more to whet your whistles.

On computers...

Wernher Van Braun wrote: Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft, and the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labour

On Gods

Jean Rostand wrote:Kill one man, and you are a murderer. Kill millions and you are a conquerer. Kill all, and you are a God

Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:Yaaaaawn.

On sex, sheep, and silence respectively.

"An intellectual is somebody who has discovered something more interesting than sex." -- Huxley.

"I once complained to my father that I didn't seem to be able to do things the same way other people did. Dad's advice? 'Margo, don't be a sheep. People hate sheep. They eat sheep." -- Margo Kaufmann.

"Silence is argument carried out by other means." -- Che.

sA

Hmmm.....

Noam Chomsky wrote:You just have a different relationshop to somebody when you're looking at them than you do when you're punching away on a keyboard and some symbols come bacl. I suspect that extending that form of abstract and remote relationship, instead of direct, personal contact, is going to have an unpleasent effects on what people are like, It will diminsh their humanity

"You started it." - Chris Brown

Robert Wilensky wrote:We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce The Complete Works Of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know thats not true

"Quotation ... A writer expresses himself in words that have been used before because they give his meaning better than he can give it himself, or because they are beautiful or witty, or because he expects them to touch a cord of association in his reader, or because he wishes to show that he is learned and well read. Quotations due to the last motive are invariably ill-advised; the discerning reader detects it and is contemptuous; the undiscerning is perhaps impressed, but even then is at the same time repelled, pretentious quotations being the surest road to tedium. " - Henry W. Fowler

What’s great about this country is that America started the tradition where the richest consumers buy essentially the same things as the poorest. You can be watching TV and see Coca-Cola, and you know that the President drinks Coke, Liz Taylor drinks Coke, and just think, you can drink Coke, too. A Coke is a Coke and no amount of money can get you a better Coke than the one the bum on the corner is drinking. All the Cokes are the same and all the Cokes are good. Liz Taylor knows it, the President knows it, the bum knows it, and you know it........... - Andy Warhol

"The silence says it all." - Nextman

"If it's not metal, it's crap!" - Dee Snyder.

Oscar Wilde wrote:The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it... I can resist everything but temptation.

Thomas Jefferson in 1816 wrote:I sincerely believe that banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies.

Henry Ford wrote:It is well enough that people of the nation do not understand our banking and monetary system, for if they did I believe there would be a revolution before tomorrow morning.

Thomas Jefferson in 1816 wrote:I sincerely believe that banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies.

Thanks a bunch, now I'm craving a game of civilization 4, I've already lost 2 full days to it over the last week.

*hurriedly moves to provide "solace and support" for Mrs. Legoburner*

My work here is done !

Is that quote featured in that game then ?

When discovering banking that quote is read by Leonard Nimoy. Dont worry about the missus, she is an even bigger civ junkie than me

To keep it on topic, I'll do another civ quote:

“You can’t direct the wind, but you can adjust your sails.” - Unknown

oh and of course:

“Beep… beep… beep… beep…” - Sputnik I

Megatron wrote:Peace through Tyranny!

Optimus Prime wrote:Freedom is the right of all sentient beings

Starscream wrote:Conquest is made of the ashes of one's enemies

Conrad Robury wrote: He who stands atop the highest pile of skulls can see the furthest

We will kill all the enemy till we have peace; peace though superior fire power.

I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.

Oscar Wilde wrote:If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.

Sandman wrote:
It is the prerogative of a fool to point out that the emperor has no clothes. But the fool is still a fool, and the emperor is still an emperor.

Which is a fun little variance on the best known line from my name sake

Shakespeare's Polonius wrote:
To thine own self be true

I don't know if he actually said it, but it is all over philadelphia,

"Beer is proof god loves us and wants us to be happy"

Ben Franklin

I have heard this attributed to both Stalin and Lenin: Eithway, they must have been orks.

"quantity has a qulaity all it's own"

"You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure. The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive. At that time, we turn around and say, yes, this is obviously where I was going all along."
-Bill Watterson

Larry the Cable Guy wrote:Git-R-Done!

"What are you meeting about? Lamps?"

"D'oh!"

That quote will be remembered for thousands of years to come. Whenever a politician screws up, whenever a pop singer appears in a sex tape, someone, somewhere will utter it.

The Thousandth Son wrote:"What are you meeting about? Lamps?"

"I want to be invited to the lamp party."

You know what years all those things take off? the ones at the end, all the adult diaper years. I don't want those years, you can have 'em!
Denis Leary.

Dagless: The cabin crew suggested we all go out and club it. I had no option; it was that or one of their B&Bs. I figured it’d be safer on the streets. For the first time ever I saw the Scotch in their natural habitat, and it weren’t pretty. I’d seen them huddling in stations before, being loud but… this time I was surrounded. Everywhere I went it felt like they were watching me; fish-white flesh puckered by the Highland breeze; tight eyes peering out for fresh meat; screechy, booze-soaked voices hollering out for a taxi to take ‘em halfway up the road to the next all-night watering hole. A shatter of glass; a round of applause; a sixteen-year-old mother of three vomiting in an open sewer, bairns looking on, chewing on potato cakes. I ain’t never going back… not never.

Sanchez: My aunt lives in Scotland, she says it’s quite nice.

Dagless: Well she's wrong.

Oi! I resemble that remark!

Mitch Ratcliffe wrote:Computers have enabled people to make more mistakes faster than almost any other invention in history, with the possible exceptions of Tequila and Handguns

And one for Legoburner specifically...

Rich Cook wrote:Programming today is a race between software engineers trying to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to create bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning

"The Truth must dazzle gradually/ Or every man be blind."
-Emily Dickinson

When all is said and done, there will be much more said than done

Never underestimate the power of stupidity

If love in blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Love is blind; lust isn't

"Peace through power" -- Kane.

"War doesn't determine who is right... only who is left" -- Wadsworth (probably someone else, but first time I heard it was from Wadsworth ca. FO3)

"We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special." -Stephen Hawking

"An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last." -- Winston Churchill.

"It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried."
-- also Winston Churchill.

"If you ever think your soldiers will be home by christmas... don't." -- ME!