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Boudica : Queen of War (Amazon Prime, 2023)

Had always been interested in this historical figure ever since she was a playable character in a Total War game. This movie made me regret that interest.

A magic bronze sword, prophecy that leads to nothing, obvious ghost children, horrible dialogue, a barrage of Jon Snow-esque “Muh Queen”, wooden acting and pretty gakky fight choreography all combine to make a truly terrible flick.

Its like if someone gave a copy of a Wish version of Braveheart to a group of kids, and then they performed a play on that version.



I did learn that there is a pretty baller statue of her in London, so thats cool.

Not sure wtf I did to have my algorithm recommend this movie to me, but I sincerely apologize to whoever I wronged.

 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
They Live

The one that’s here to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and it’s all out of bubble gum.

Nada is a down on his luck construction worker who stumbles onto the horrible, horrible truth: capitalism, consumerism and exploitation walk among us. They Live is a classic that will ever be a movie that’s More Relevant Now Than Ever. So, yeah, it holds up.

If that doesn’t appeal, here are two other reasons to watch it:

1. The memes.
2. The never-ending alley fight.

Watch it. Buy it. Buy the t-shirt. Buy the Ultra-4k Special Edition.
Consume.

I love that film. Just a few days ago I thought about it, how it might be interpreted by people in weird ways. Then I got back to that thing where the extreme right now use narratives formerly used by just the left and of course people are confused.

Either way, They Live is a great, timeless film.

One last comment on Furiosa, apparently it was originally planned as an anime. As a cartoon, I think it would have worked. As a film, I remain cheated.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
They Live

1. The memes.
2. The never-ending alley fight.

Watch it. Buy it. Buy the t-shirt. Buy the Ultra-4k Special Edition.
Consume.

Very surprised this hasn't been remade as a right wing indie film. Q could finance it.

I find it increasingly frustrating that the things made to point out the problems with the system, in this case Reaganomics (in John Carpenter’s own words), are being taken and used by bigots and conspiracy theorists. After StudentofEtherium’s post, I went to check out the comments on some They Live reviews, and yep. It’s all antisemitism, antivaxxer/QAnon, or some weird demon/lizardman gibberish.

The other day I read somewhere that WNs tried to claim Prisencolinensinaincusol of all things.


I just wanted to discuss a fun movie with a bit of a heavy handed anti-consumerist/anti-exploitation message.

Qanon is like The Thing, it absorbs and incorporates all other conspiracy theories into itself so it can wear their faces to lure in more gullible fools.

 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
I find it increasingly frustrating that the things made to point out the problems with the system, in this case Reaganomics (in John Carpenter’s own words), are being taken and used by bigots and conspiracy theorists. After StudentofEtherium’s post, I went to check out the comments on some They Live reviews, and yep. It’s all antisemitism, antivaxxer/QAnon, or some weird demon/lizardman gibberish.

The other day I read somewhere that WNs tried to claim Prisencolinensinaincusol of all things.


I just wanted to discuss a fun movie with a bit of a heavy handed anti-consumerist/anti-exploitation message.

If I may be so bold?

Engage with those who might’ve read too much into it.

For instance, I see where SoE is coming from. Because They Live can be interpreted that way. But, if you read or watch interviews with those behind its making, it becomes apparent that wasn’t their message.

It doesn’t make SoE inherently wrong, especially because I’m sure we’ve all met clueless bigots online who’ll swear any given media is supporting their “ist” agenda. But, I will argue SoE is just mistaken in this particular instance. And dare I say that SoE might need to dial it back a wee bit and research the background. As in read up on the writer, director and producer’s aim.

Just because something could be interpreted one way, doesn’t define the thing.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:

 BobtheInquisitor wrote:
I find it increasingly frustrating that the things made to point out the problems with the system, in this case Reaganomics (in John Carpenter’s own words), are being taken and used by bigots and conspiracy theorists. After StudentofEtherium’s post, I went to check out the comments on some They Live reviews, and yep. It’s all antisemitism, antivaxxer/QAnon, or some weird demon/lizardman gibberish.

The other day I read somewhere that WNs tried to claim Prisencolinensinaincusol of all things.


I just wanted to discuss a fun movie with a bit of a heavy handed anti-consumerist/anti-exploitation message.

If I may be so bold?

Engage with those who might’ve read too much into it.

For instance, I see where SoE is coming from. Because They Live can be interpreted that way. But, if you read or watch interviews with those behind its making, it becomes apparent that wasn’t their message.

It doesn’t make SoE inherently wrong, especially because I’m sure we’ve all met clueless bigots online who’ll swear any given media is supporting their “ist” agenda. But, I will argue SoE is just mistaken in this particular instance. And dare I say that SoE might need to dial it back a wee bit and research the background. As in read up on the writer, director and producer’s aim.

Just because something could be interpreted one way, doesn’t define the thing.

 StudentOfEtherium wrote:
and i know Carpenter has said that wasn't the intent, and i believe he didn't mean it that way,

speaking as a Jewish person, it's uncomfortable whether or not it was intended that way, but i don't hold it against Carpenter for the way culture has changed since the film came out

Anyway, are we looking forward to the remake of The Crow? The other night I caught the last third or so on TV. What a film. That remake has been in development hell and passed on between studios and directors for 15 years now or so. Probably not the best indicators.

Blood & Bone

A Michael Jai White martial arts vehicle.

The plot is paper thin, but the fight scenes are superbly choreographed and shot. Our star is in phenomenal shape, and moves beautifully.

It is however heavy on the stereotypes, which I found a bit off putting.

Worth watching for the fight scenes, the rest I reckon you can comfortably skip through.

Michael Jai White is a phenomenon. I never got into his work much, but he's been around for a long time now, and seems to be really good at what he does. Does he work as a lead? IIRC I only saw him as a baddie so far. edit: Wait, I must have confused him with somebody else. He was the dude who played Spawn!

He’s a so-so actor. Not terrible, but limited range.

On a scale where an Oscar Winner is a slap up steak dinner with all the trimmings, and Steven Seagal is an out of date service station egg and cress sandwich on gluten free bread?

Michael Jai White is a McDonalds. Nowhere near the best available option, but plenty reliable and you know it’s going to be tasty enough.

What’s important is that he has serious screen presence. Which given he’s a martial artist first, actor second is fine with me.

Now on Falcon Rising, another of his films.

Thanks, Prime. Thrime

Funnily enough I rewatched Black Dynamite yesterday. Such a great film which perfectly recreates the feeling of a 70s blaxsploitation movie complete with production errors such as boom mics in view, flubbed lines and actors reading the stage directions, editing mistakes etc.

And seeing Nixon get his arse kicked in a Kung Fu fight in the White House is always great.

Well, guess that one is up next!

Lazy birthday weekends kick ass.

Also genuine props to MJW for steering clear of Egosploitation. He’s the lead character, sure. But not the only character.

Ah, you'll love it.

Just a little taste

I’m sure I’ve seen it before, just don’t remember it very well.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Well it’s inevitable!

Black Dynamite

This film is fantastic. A solid spoof of Blaxploitation, without being farcical, and the cast play it pretty straight, relying on subtle overacting and a deliberately dodgy script rather than nod and wink to camera.

This is definitely worth watching,

The Revenant (2015)

Not sure why it took me so long to see this flick, when it was much hyped at the time of release and got Dicaprio an Academy Award later that year.

Very solid flick, but incredibly graphic, dark & intense. There were parts where I started to feel cold because of what was happening on screen, and the opening battle/massacre was a wild sequence. Quite a few parts had me pretty damn happy to have been born in the late 20th Century. Its a film that will stick with me, but not something I’ll go out of my way to rewatch.

Tom Hardy’s performance was stellar, and I feel his performance truly elevated the movie, despite Leo having top billing. His character was so crazy and despicable I couldn’t look away when he was on screen, whereas Leo’s character was just a force of nature bent to survive and get his revenge. Solid supporting cast with Domhall Gleeson and Will Poulter as well.

This was the palette cleanser that I needed after Boudica: Queen of War.

 Sigur wrote:


Anyway, are we looking forward to the remake of The Crow?

For me? No, not really.
I saw the original way back whenever it was new. While I thought it was pretty good I've also just never had the urge to watch it again.
So I highly doubt I'll be seeing the remake. And if I ever do it certainly won't be in the theatre.

I have watched The Crow a lot. It pushes all kinds of buttons in my psyche.

The new one looks utterly terrible and misses all of the points of the original.

Weird Science

A well regarded movie, but possibly lesser remembered than it deserves.

Two randy young losers create a woman via not-quite-Internet-as-we-know-it, and hi-jinks ensue.

This is one of my favourite movies. The cast and script really come together as a perfect slice of nonsense. And because not-quite-Internet is central to said nonsense, a movie which has held up to the passage of time surprisingly well.

Even the TV series I remember as not being utterly awful, bucking the tend of early 90’s attempts to syndicate movies of a few years before.

New Life (2023)

Wasn’t sure what to expect with this one. Thought it was a horror movie about aliens because the cover art looked to be a spacesuit. Turns out its a bit more grounded.

A bloodied woman runs into her house, cleans up and grabs what she can and takes off on foot. Another woman, who seems to be some sort of hitman/fixer is contacted by her work and told to apprehend the woman on the run.

What follows is the mystery woman making brief connections along the way while reminiscing of the life she left and what led her to this situation. Meanwhile, the fixer is dealing with the shock of an ALS diagnosis and trying to come to terms with it during the mission.

Turns out :



Not a whole lot of scares in the 1hour 15 minute runtime, but still pretty good horror/thriller/chase movie.

Worth a rent.

Didn't have much luck with the new-ish movie I was watching (The Creator, it had potential, but the screenwriter was much more interested in mashing the "America bad" button than writing something entertaining), so I thought I'd try some movies from yesteryear:-

Treasure Planet
One of those weird, forgotten Disney movies. But apart from some poorly aged CG elements in the animation, it totally doesn't deserve to be barely remembered, even if it will always be the 2nd best Treasure Island adaptation.

The Shadow
Always liked this one. The final confrontation is still, sadly, a bit lacklustre, but the rest of the movie holds up well. Shame they never did any sequels, but I don't know enough about the source material to know if it could handle becoming multiple films.

 Flinty wrote:
I have watched The Crow a lot. It pushes all kinds of buttons in my psyche.

The new one looks utterly terrible and misses all of the points of the original.

Fully agree about your sentiments of the remake.

The Crow is worth a rewatch I think. There's so much stuff in there I completely forgot about, like Bai Ling's character!


@Mad Doc Grotsnik: Maybe I should re-watch that. I think I've seen it once when I was a kid.

The Baker

I am a sucker for the "You messed with the wrong guy" genre of films. This fits into that category comfortably. This time Ron Pearlman is the star as the aging but lethal Baker. Plus, as a former baker myself, it tickled me to see the profession held up on screen.

Solid entertainment.


Morbius

It's Morbin' time!

You know, I haven't seen a movie try so hard to set-up a sequel it didn't deserve since the Jem movie.

I actually felt bad for Jared Leto and Matt Smith, because they are not bad actors. However, this movie gave them NOTHING to work with. It felt like something an early teenager wrote on some dodgy internet site for spicy, homoerotic fan-fiction.

The Vampire effects do not hold up at all. The script needed three more re-works to be baked, and the direction as wooden. Key scenes that should have an impact feel unearned and wooden. The comedy moments just fall flat. I also can not shake the feeling that the blood-borne pathogen angle was somehow a metaphor for the Aids epidemic..... but maybe I am overthinking it due to the homo-eroticism of the whole thing.

The most exciting part is when Michael Keaton shows up as Adrian Toombs in a Vulture Cameo that is completely undeserved.

If we are really lucky, maybe someday Sony will make a Vulture, Morbius, Venom, Madam Web, and Kraven team-up movie sort of like the Avengers! Oh my, what a spectacle of garbage that would be!

The First Omen (2024)

A prequel to the 1976 classic The Omen.

Satanic horror movies are kind of stale and predictable in my opinion, but this movie was alright.

Starts off strong with Ralph Ineson and Charles Dance, then it switches to a young nun about to take her vows. Bill Nighy also co-stars. The young nun uncovers the schemes and mysteries that lead up to the original film. Probably a bit on the boring side where a great deal of nothing happens for some time, but I didn't hate it. Reminded me quite a bit of last years "The Immaculate" starring Sydney Sweeney.

Brings nothing new to the table, but might be worth a rent if you enjoy these types of movies.

I was watching that yesterday, but couldn’t finish it.

It’s pretty average, especially in a post The Conjuring and Insidious cinema world.

The central conceit of the plot is interesting, but the film itself just didn’t land for me.

It strikes me as a film which is telling a story that just doesn't need to be told?

I think having the exact details of how the events of The Omen came about as mostly unknown and only hinted to is quite essential to the atmosphere of the film.

It'd be like trying to explain the origins of the demon in The Exorcist, but thankfully they never made another Exorcist film about Regan specifically, or named that particular demon.

 A Town Called Malus wrote:
It strikes me as a film which is telling a story that just doesn't need to be told?

I think having the exact details of how the events of The Omen came about as mostly unknown and only hinted to is quite essential to the atmosphere of the film itself.

Yeah, the whole not knowing how Damian was created is a mystery that I didn't need revealed.

I feel like this movie was made because Studio A started filming on a "How to create a Satan Baby" movie (The Immaculate), and Studio B said "We need a 'How to create a Satan Baby' movie to compete" (The First Omen).

Mystery Science Theater 3000 The Gauntlet (2018)

A Netflix season, new cast but geek royalty like Felicia Day and Patton Oswalt. First up was Mac and Me, and this is the only way I would ever watch that turd.

Now on Atlantic Rim, a mockbuster of Pacific Rim. It's bad.

By which I mean it is very good.

Mac and Me gets some progressive points for casting a disabled actor in a disabled role.

The rest is awful.

The Mist

A Stephen King movie directed by Frank Darabont, starring many actors who’d show up in The Walking Dead.

Probably most notorious for its ending, this is a curiously difficult watch for me. Solely because of the religious maniac giving me the fear.

On the other hand, Mac and Me did give us one of the best running jokes with Paul Rudd repeatedly getting Conan to roll a clip from it thinking that it was a preview of Rudd's latest project.




And then he even did it to Conan on Conan's own podcast.