Ok, you know how it goes (probably). If not, here's an example.
poster 1
I put my flag on the hill
my hill

poster 2
[MOD EDIT - Find a more appropriate way to get your point across please - thanks!]
my hill

poster 3
[MOD EDIT - Find a more appropriate way to get your point across please - thanks!]
my hill

So, I create a hill. My hill.

I ascend the hill. My hill.

This thread's alive yay! It also appears to be alive enough to grow an arm and punch you from the hill. My hill.

No one else posts, so the thread dies. I walk up the hill. My hill.

But us two are both posting, so the thread is very much alive and able to punch you. My hill.

I appear! The thread becomes alive enough to realize that I am it's true master. It overthrows its unwanted slavedriver and liquified Josh.
My hill

However then it realizes you're worse than the rest of us for slave-driving and throws you off the hill. I then claim the hill. My hill.

I throw my can of coke at you, knocking you off the hill. My hill.

I put you in hell for littering. My hill.

I clean up the litter, and so ascend above the hill for my righteousness. My hill.

All of the sudden, a giant bomb fell out of the air, oblitarating gutsnagga. The hill recognises thenoobbomb,who is the bomb. The Hill accepts it fate.
MY HILL

I gain sentience. I realise that I am the hill. I throw off all those who would try to claim me for their own. My Hill.

I dig up the hill and dump it in a big hole somewhere. I then find another hill, of similar size and shape, and claim it as my own. My hill.

Unfortunately, this happens to be a hill of high explosives. It goes boom. I find a hill made of earth and claim it as my own. My hill.

Unfortunately its a hill on a cave that caves in. I go up to the elevated ruins. My hill.

A B-2 Bomber contracted by moi drops a laser guided missile right on the top of your head. I then parachute in.
My hill.

A anti air battery shoots down the bomber as it makes another passover and it crashes on you. My hill

I arise from beneath the soil and scare you away, screaming like a little girl.
My. Hill.
And I plant pumpkins on it.

The pumpkin explodes, you walk away to take a shower, my hill

I return from the showers and snap you silly with a wet towel.
My Hill.

I wail so piteously that you come over to see if I am alright, I kick you in the testicles and as you writhe on the ground I go over to the hill. My hill.

for an idea of how pitiful the crying is

I wail Like a Banshee and you die from fright.
My Hill.
And I place Sentry Guns around the Perimeter.

I walk past the sentry guns, and push you off the hill, I then grab a filled up generator and plug the sentry guns into it. My hill

I am now Magneto, and I make the generator overload and blow it and the sentry up. Oh, and then use the scraps to make a small coffin and shove you in there and chuck it into the sea. My hill

Turns out the explosion showered the hill in spores... Ork spores.
The orks recognise me as their leader, and we storm the hill.
My hill.

And suddenly an alien spacecraft appears and burns the Orks and everyone on it into ashes, and baxter123 strolls on and claims it for the Emperor...
And then builds a giant hive city on it, surrounded by millions of men.
My hill

My Chaos cults infiltrate the hive city. As my fleet of Word Bearers arrives in orbit they disable the weapons batteries and military capabilities of the city. My Word Bearers storm the city, killing all the loyalists. We fortify the city again.

My Hill.

The word bearers run out of ink to write on their armour post it notes they love so much. Because of that, they run back screaming to the warp to get some. In their absence I take over the hill, and set the orbital defence cannots to destroy the chaod forces as the they return.

My hill.

Unfortunately, a certain robot devil was left in charge of those cannons. You die, and it's my hill. And I've still got the cannons if any of you are wondering.

I use my remote to detonate the cannons, obliterating you in the explosion. I walk up and sit down.
My Hill.

I pull the chair out from under you as you sit down, my hill

I pull the chair from your grip and hit you over the head with it, sending you tumbling down the hill. I then put the chair down, now welded to the ground. My hill

I blow up the chair that happened to be made of dynamite. My hill.

You can't weld dynamite, therefor it couldn't have been made of Dynamite and must have been metal. My hill.

I hooked the metal chair up to the electrics. 10'000V powered them cannons.

My hill.

But as you sit down on the melting chair I imprison you in a giant freezer box and kick you off the hill.
I then destroy the cannons and put myself in an indestructable box chained to the hill.
My hill

I cut the chains and use them to chain your indestructible box shut. I then roll the box into the sea. Enjoy life trapped in an indestructible box underwater.

My hill.

I take some of this newly discovered indestructable metal, create some armour for myself, then gun you down with an AK-47. I then stand on the hill in my indestructable armour. My hill.

I cut off access and wait for you to starve. My hill.

You spelt "off" wrong. My hill.

Damn stuck keyboard..
Thats the best thing you could come up with? My hill.

Yep. My hill. Ish.

Nope, my hill.

I bang your heads together while you argue about whose hill it is. My hill.

You don't exist. Therefore, my hill.

Cogito ergo sum. I think, therefore I am. My hill.

Nah. My hill

Rubbish reason. My hill.

My sig's got more in it than yours. My hill.

Quality over quantity. My hill.

You didn't put a space between the sinking feeling thread and the penthouse link. My hill.

While the three of you are busy arguing over trivial matters, my ship sends a virus bomb onto the planet's surface, then send an incindiary after the flesh-eating virus has done it's job to ignite it all. My hill.
Oh, and just for shiggles, I blow up the hive city and add the rubble to the hill to make it more grandiose. And then put a statue of me in Power Armor.

From 2.5 km away I shoot you with a rail gun, I get off and blow up the rail gun. Then I get in a ATV and drive over your corpse just to insure your death. My Hill, with a fancy ATV

ATV really stands for Amazingly Tiny Velociraptor. It can't help you when I invade with axe cop to help me.
My hill.

Stoopid video no work.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkTnfcOBxE8&list=UU0ChxsyE3u9VFgDywKLv1uw&index=0&feature=plcp
My hill.

Your link is broken, I bring Link to stab you, my hill

I use the Triforce to defeat your Link.
My Hill.

I destroy the internet and claim the hill in the resulting confusion as the world tears itself apart.

My hill.

I rally the people, saying you are the destroyer of the internet, a vicious mob attacks you.
My Hill

I get married to the mob.

My hill

The Mob wants a honeymoon, they drag you off to Hawaii.

My Hill.

I stealthily climb the hill and kick you off it. My hill.

I use a mortar and blow you off the hill.

My hill.

I return from hawai
My hill

Your many wives and husbands come back too, they want you to go visit their homicidal relatives. They bury you alive.

My hill.

Then my Power Armor statue suddenly cracks and falls down on you. It's about two tons.
My Hill.

As you run up to claim the hill you fall into a pitfall trap, I walk up to the edge and mock you.

My Hill

I activate my jet-pack, and fly right up to you, kick you in-between the legs, and let you fall into the pitfall instead. My hill.

I dig my way under you with a rusty spork and a roll of duct tape, I stab you with the spork and duct tape your hands and feet together, then I activate your jetpack watching you fly in circles.

My hill

I send you to robot hell for a crime that devious. My hill.

I switch you off and steal your hands. My hill. I can also now play the holophoner really well.

I send my damned army after you, steal back the hands and put everyone into robot hell. My hill. By the way, anyone here play the violin?

I play the fiddle. My hill.

Yeah, but not as well as me. My hill.

Just call me Johnny.




My hill.

Fair enough, but I can play the fiddle with three hands. My hill.

While you fiddle around, I take back the hill.
My Hill.

Pumpkins are hellish. Therefore you serve me. Therefore I can order you to go away and the hill's mine again. My hill.

You use the "I'm the robot devil" joke too much. It becomes unfunny and you are forgotten about. My hill.

But I am!
...still your hill. Apparently the robot devil doesn't have enough power to take it off you

But Gotham's reckoning does. My hill.

As i cannot go to the hill while buried, the hill comes to me
My hill

I McGyver my way out of hell, I grab a cement truck and bury you further in cement.

My Hill

Since McGyver became McNeal I stargate my way back to the top of the hill.
My hill

I gear up in a T-45D suit of Power Armor (Fallout power Armor), and I launch a nuke at you, I walk up to the hill with a beatbox playing


My Hill

And then my Cryptek arrives from nowhere and launches an energy beam at you, which liquifies your suit of armor, then proceeds to smack you around for a bit while I climb up...
My Hill.

You slip in the liquified armor while climbing and fall back down to the bottom. Meanwhile the pumpkins I planted a few pages ago sprout up and I emerge on top of
My Hill.

I pick your pumpkins and turn you into soup. My hill.

I eat the soup
My hill

The essence of Snurl in the soup tries to possess you. You are driven mad and run screaming from the hill. My hill.

He runs away screaming not from madness, but because he sees me rising up behind you. I administer an atomic wedgie and send you packing off of
My Hill

"Off of" is bad grammar. The grammar nazis shoot you. My hill.

Nazi's are a political party, so must be capitalized. The Grammar Nazi's turn on you, then I gas the Grammar Nazi's

My Hill.

The gas you used on the nazis blows back in your face. As you choke and gag, a pumpkin shell smashes offside your head. I have returned to
My Hill.

Unfortunately you are also unprotected against the gasses, so you fall down grasping your throat making funny gurgling noises. I don a gas mask and claim
My Hill.

I use a giant fan to blow the gas, and you, off the hill. I then destroy the fan. My hill.

I dig out the hill...

My hole

I fill the hill back in on top of you. My hill.

I pour a bunch of water on the loose dirt hill, you are buried in a landslide. I stand on your cairn and
My hill

I emerge from the earth zombie style, grabbing your ankle and causing you to flee the hill in terror. My hill.

I run home and grab an AR-15 with bayonet, I shoot you in the head and then decapitate you.

My hill

I appear from behind a bush and beat you to death with a crowbar for destroying my mannequin.

My hill.

My suicide bomb goes off.

....someone elses crater

I work tirelessly to pile the bits of hill back into shape. Then I resume haunting
My Hill.

My bits and pieces reassemble Necron style, then I exorcise your spirit from the grounds of
My Hill.

I call in an airstrike and bomb you all the feth off
My flatland

You missed. The top. Of My Hill.

I spray the hill with Roundup. My hill.

I tunnel under the hill, then emerge on top of it. My hill.

I release the dogs to run you off. I return to the top of my hill.

I fear no canine. Plus I have sausages, which I throw off the hill for the dogs to chase. My hill.

Fine, wild cats are sent at you. My hill.

I also have an army of trained attack dogs, that takes care of those wild cats. My hill.

The dogs bite the hand that feeds them. Also the face, neck and ninety percent of your body. I have them removed and claim the hill. My hill.

I convince the pound that you are the owner of the vicious dogs, they have you arrested.

My Hill.

I prove that they belonged to The RobotLol. You are arrested and sentenced for perversion of justice. my hill.

I break out of jail using a pair of tweezers, some paracord, and a rather unhappy squirrel. Then with those same items I kill you by, opening your up with tweezers, putting the squirrel in your mouth, and sewing your mouth shut with the paracord. Stay tuned for the next episode staring DeathGyver on
My Hill.

I may be in hospital recovering from the treachery of the attack dogs, bitterly plotting a terrible vengence on you all, but the dogs still infest the hill, the very same you are currently residing upon. And they are not happy. My hill.

You fail to read my previous post where I stated that I had the dogs removed. My hill.

The dogs are sneaky bastards, they find a way back. My hill.

Not after I set up a bunch of cats for the dogs to chase, and a bunch of dog traps. I bribe the nurses to make you happy.

My hill, now enjoy your nurses.

The nurses send you a huge bill, which you cannot pay. The bank of snurl forecloses on your hill, now my hill.

I bail out wardragoon thus sending the bankers away, then shoot him. My hill.

I Fed-Ex myself to the top of the hill. When you sign for the package I burst out and attack, suffocating you with bubble-wrap. My Hill.

I reincarnate as a policeman and arrest you, before requisitioning the hill. My hill.

With the powers of corruption I get myself appointed to police chief, I take the hill from you and give you a 2000$ a year bonus.

My Hill

Suddenly, you, the police chief was arrested for TAX EVASION! They take you away as I climb up...
My Hill.

I arrest you for trespass on the hill. My hill.

I cover the hill with paint and glue, then flock it with static grass and sell it at a convention, because, after all, it was my hill.

I buy it.
My hill now

You leave it on a table at an FLGS, and chavs come in, swipe the hill and start throwing it around like a frisbee. A dog catches it in mid air and brings it to me. My Hill.

However it was a trap for the Chav's it is laced with deadly neurotoxin, you start foaming from the mouth as I walk in with a biohazard suit.
My Hill.

P.S. WTF is a Chav?

The now-infected dog bites you repeatedly and tears holes in your bio suit, as I laugh. Being undead (you killed me yourself a few times) I am immune to the toxic fun. As you begin to foam I start digging your grave on top of my hill.

Ask any DAKKITE from the UK what a chav is for a far better description than i can give you.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav
My hill because no american deserves it if any american doesn't know what a chav is.

I change my name to 'Us'.

All of your hill is belong to Us.

My hill because I am an american who does indeed know what chavs are after working with some UK folks for years. I just thought the chav phenomonon would be described best and colorfully by an actual UK citizen.

The US has 'em too but there really isnt a name for 'em.

And yes, the hill belongs to US pumpkins.

Unfortunately your pumpkin powers only operate around halloween, so I can just walk up and claim

My Hill.

Every day is Halloween at my house. My hill.

I bring along the band Smashing Pumpkins. They play awesome music while I smash every pumpkin on the hill into a pulp. My hill.

It then becomes halloween, and the Pumpkins of the world seek revenge on you for smashing their kind. I then direct the vengeful horde to your hill. My hill.

All of the pumpkin pulp = Pulp Fiction. I tie you to a chair for hours before blowing your brains out, all over My Hill.

However, the brains turn out to be self-destructive and blow up, destroying everything within 5 miles but the hill. Then I drive in from 6 miles away and take the hill. My hill.

Your vehicle blows up as you crest the hill. I climb the hill. My hill.

Pieces of the exploded vehicle are sent flying in all direction, a stray piece crashes into you, knocking you off the hill. My hill.

I use my ejector seat just in time and parachute back down to the hill, knocking robot off in the process. My hill.

I shoot holes in your parachute, causing you to plummet onto robot at terminal velocity. The results aren't pretty. I wander up the hill and clean off your remains with a hose. My hill.

The remains re piece themselves together and form a zombie, which then attacks you and throws you off the hill. My hill.

Zombies are my speciality. I cut your head of with a machete, beat your body into a pulp with a crowbar and burn the remains. My hill.

"Off" not "Of". The grammar nazis take you away for execution. My hill.

My British spirt jumps in and I give the grammar jerries a right good hiding. They don't like it up 'em! My hill.

Grammar Nazi Zombies arise and edit you off my hill.

Too many capital letters, so they turn on you. My hill.

I tell Blaps mother what you are saying about her, she smashes into you, flattening you.

My hill.

The mother of all battles rages around and you are stuck in as well. When the coast is clear I take control of the hill and build a castle on it. The castle moat is filled with pirahna, and there are AA guns on the towers. I raise the drawbridge, and the flag, on my hill.

Only problem is, the castle is built on unsteady ground. One day, there's a large earthquake in the vicinity, and the castle, and everything in it, collapses into rubble. I then pilot a flying saucer and use a robot arm to place my flag with my face on it on...
My hill.

Yeah, but then I get tzeench to take the hill for me, and in return I become a daemon prince who sits on my hill stopping any invaders. My hill.

I didn't want to do this, but I call in Creed. The hill is now 1000 Grey Knights led by Draigo. You last about a quarter of a second. My hill.

Tzeench creates a daemonic incursion on the other side of the galaxy, and all the GK run off over there, while I come back onto the hill. All the GK are too busy to do anything. My hill.

Someoe throws a Tesseract labyrinth at you. You're only getting out if someone releases you, and no one wants that, not even Tzeentch. My hill.

But I'm tzeench's loyal servant, so he decides to put the hill inside the Tesseract labyrinth as well, with me on top of it. My hill.

You however failed to notice the several C'tan Shards in there with you. You are quickly beaten. As a punishment for not actually dong anything for him and just getting repeatedly defeated, Tzeentch turns you into a mindless spawn, a fate from which there is no escape. I then crack open the tesseract and claim the hill. My hill.

I'm still inside the tesseract and attack you, causing tzeench to turn you into a spawn. As I have finally completed a mission, tzeench gives me a second chance and turns me into a horror. Who happens to be on the hill. My hill.

Because I trapped you and through my actions you became a spawn, Khorne turns me from a spawn into a Bloodthirster. So long Horror. My hill.

Tzeench manages to trick Khorne into sending you elsewhere. My hill.

I move the hill to the Iron Kingdoms. Tzeentch has no relevance to this reality, and you vanish in a puff of logic. My hill.

I build my own one. Our hills.

An IG artillery regiment pound the "fake" hill into a crater, and then I call in cosmic bulldozers to move the hill to a reality I created, so your fictional characters have no hold, physical, etherial, or otherwise. I then sit on...
My Hill.

You are off in a world of your own creating, imagining that you own the hill. You are in fact in a straightjacket in a padded cell because you are quite mad. My hill.

I cast Wall of Dirt into the air above you. Ten Million cubic yards of dirt bury you alive beneath my hill
(now much bigger than before)

I break out of the insane asylum, fashion a flamethrower out of a super-soaker and duct tape, then proceed to BURN EVERYTHING! AH-HAHAHAHA!!!
My Hill.

When the fire is out, I fly over and drop a hive full of angry bees on you. When they are done stinging you I drop your honey covered body into a pit full of lesbians. My Hill.

Meanwhile, everyone has forgotten about the hill which I'm sitting on. My hill.

I haven't. I casually walk up the hill behind you, before kicking you off. My hill.

I draw my pistol and shoot you in the head, before walking up to the hill. My hill.

(Mmmm, lesbians-- err, I'm sorry!)
I lead my newly fashioned army of Lesbians of Lesbos Island and have them toss you off the hill and into the Grand Canyon. They have sworn eternal Loyalty to me and me alone.
My Hill. And an awesome party.

You keep the hill for the majority of the month, but when PMS hits you find out they are all synchronised, I disguise myself as a chick with an army of PMSing lesbians to defend me on
My Hill

Uh, this is going a bit far. There's only one thing for it.


My crater.

Then, in a freak accident, the Exterminatus fleet is destroyed in a warp storm before they can deploy their munitions.
Oh, and I knock Wardragoon off...
My Hill.

I send you a Candygram. It is actually filled with a bomb.
My hill.

I kick you off the hill, before deploying ten billion imperial guardsmen to defend the hill for me. My hill.

I begin a Scorched earth policy in the area around the hill. Your soldiers begin to starve and resort to cannibalism. You are eaten, and the last defender starves to death. I walk up the hill with supply of food and sit down. My hill.

A sniper team head-shots you, then provides cover while I step up to take...
My Hill.

I use voodoo to turn your snipers inside out.
I then wire the hill with nukes.

If I can't have the hill, no one can.

I walk up to you, punch you, take the detonator. And blow up the hill. In a radiation suit, I walk up and claim the highest point on the edge of the crater.
My Hill

I arrive in a CRASSUS ARMORED ASSAULT TRANSPORT and knock you into the crater, where mutant ants decide you taste good. My hill.

After the mutants see my hirsute body they not only decide not to eat me, but choose to follow me en masse. Me and the mutant horde overrun the CRASSUS ARMORED ASSAULT CARRIER, throwing you on the fire next. We eat tasty pumpkin on
My Hill.

But it's not a hill, it's a crater!
My crater.

I use my army of mutants to fill in the crater, burying the CRASSUS ARMORED ASSAULT CARRIER. Making a hill. More importantly its
My Hill.

The carrier's plasma engines blow up. My nuclear crater.

I burrow deep beneath the earth's crust and create a fissure so that lava spews up into the crater, fills it, then heaps up until a sizeable new hill is created. Then I resume my position at the top of my hill.

I then summon Pele, the Goddess of Fire, and task her to remove you from the hill. By physical force if necessary. I then take a seat on...
My Hill.

I appeal to Pele and she peels you off the hill, then squirts you out of the universe like a watermelon seed. I remain on top of my hill.

I appeal to Tzeentch while in the warp. I come back, beat the snot out of Pele, and fling you into the warp portal I entered from.
My Hill.

I, disguised as Alpharius, disguised as myself, sneak up on you and throw you off My Hill.

As you sleep, I return and glue you into a rabbit suit. Then I post rabbit season signs all over the hill. When you awake you are assaulted by shotgun fire from all directions.
I smell rabbit stew cooking as I relax on my hill.

You find my Alpharius disguise in the hill, it turns out to actually be Alpharius. He kills you then I take off my Alpharius disguise.
My Hill

I then bolter you and alpharius to death. With 50 vulcan mega-bolters. My hill.

I stealthily tread through the forest of guns, then I unplug the generator to the feed hoppers. As you try to open fire I walk up and pimp slap you off
My Hill

Lucky I've got backup generators linked separately to each of the mega-bolters and very good patrols then
My hill.

I call in artillery fire on the Ammo bunkers, with bunker busters.
I walk up under a seeming sky of fireworks. I stand atop your burnt and shrapnel filled corpse. Singing a song about

My Hill.

Slaanesh likes the song and takes you as its own, before ressurecting me. My hill.

I win slaanesh's favor, I convince her you are a sex god, so she takes you away to use you for kinky experiments. I stand pitying you on
My Hill.

After a few experiments, she decides to turn me into lucius the eternal. I then come down and kill you with my whip on
My hill.

I whip up a tornado to blow you off the hill and all the way to Oz, where you land on Nurgle's lap. I dig in on top of my hill.

I deploy a DKoK siege regiment. After a decade long artillery bombardment, the hill is obliterated and I construct a new hill in its place.

My hill.

I infiltrate your construction crew and bury you under tons of concrete, near the top of my hill.

I push you in to the concrete before it dries.

My hill.

Taking insperation from Bane, all of the concrete that I'm using to build my hill is actually laced with explosives. My second in command presses the detonator and blows you up.

My hill.

I bring batman.....wait, no god moves...Okay, I bring Commander Chenkov and 30 million guardsmen, after 50% casualties I retake
My Hill.

I bring a single space marine, with no helmet, and a menacing facial scar for all the plot armor, and bitchslap you off My Hill.

I get into a broadside suit. Even a movie marine can't take a railgun or masses of smart missiles. My hill.

I bring the crane from the junkyard. I use the electromagnet to pick up you and your suit. Then I lift you way high and drop you, again and again, until the screaming stops.
Then I climb back up my hill.

I push you down it.
My hill.

I trip you on your way up, then I proceed to climb up
My Hill.

I throw a knife at each of you, then walk up and take
My hill.

I whack you with my Homerun Bat, and watch you sail off into the distance.
My hill.

My clone takes the bat from your hands and follows suit. My hill.

 p_gray99 wrote:
My clone takes the bat from your hands and follows suit. My hill.

Look at your bat, now look at me, now look back at your bat.
I'm mind controlling you, and you beat yourself to death with the bat.
I then nuke the hill. I liked it before as a hole.
My crater.

I distract you with a bright shiny thing. While you are not looking the new Hill2.0 is delivered right on top of you, squashing you like a bug. I sit triumphant on my hill, now defended with claymores, pit traps, and pungee sticks.

I paradrop down onto the top of the hill, avoiding all of your traps and shooting you in the face.

My hill.

 Coolyo294 wrote:
I paradrop down onto the top of the hill, avoiding all of your traps and shooting you in the face.

My hill.

I put a Shai-Hulud larva into the hill and accelerate it's growth. After a few days it rises up and swallows you whole. I then spray it with a fire hose, killing it.
My hill.

Inquisitor snurl arrives on the hill and a big ugly nun with a big ugly ruler smacks you senseless as I purge the xenos taint from my hill.

I convince your superior that your nun is a daemonhost. You are summoned to a trial, under suspicion of heresy.
My hill.

Has anyone else noticed that the thread has been godwinned on the first post

Now you have gone and done it.
I administer a pants-down-spanking and send you crying off of my hill.

A little gnome comes up and head-butts you in the crotch. Then he and his buddies carry you away to faraway lands, and more importantly off...
My Hill.

Girl Scouts come and set up a camp on the hill, where they plant flowers and sing happy songs. Their scoutmaster calls the police about the creepy man who wont leave the hill, and you are forced to flee. Eventually they decorate with pumpkins for Halloween......My hill.

The Girl Scouts start using the pumpkins for pumpkin pie, and end up making you into a pumpkin pie, afterwords I call the police about your disappearance, causing them to find your remains in the Girl Scout pumpkin pies, after all the Girl Scouts are arrested, I grab my flag and claim
My Hill.

However it's a stolen flag, and you're arrested as well. My hill.

But then, you're arrested for TAX EVASION!
My Hill.

After seeing what a den of evil this hill is the police evict you and impound it

The Police's Hill.

I open a coffee and doughnut shop near the hill.
My hill.

And then the Arbites arrive in force and beat the snot out of everyone. Being a Senior Judge, I walk up to...
My Hill.

You are caught red handed (or would it be pants down?) with a prostitute, you are arrested and lose your job. I enlist Bane's help and lure all the police under
My Hill.

I rush up the other side of the hill with 300 Spartans and quickly dispatch everyone there. Then we set up a perimeter and prepare to defend my hill. FOR SPARTA!

 snurl wrote:
I rush up the other side of the hill with 300 Spartans and quickly dispatch everyone there. Then we set up a perimeter and prepare to defend my hill. FOR SPARTA!

I convince Blade that the spartans are a bunch of vampire lackeys. He kills them all.
I use the remains to make a throne on
My hill.

i convince Aries, Achilles, Beowulf, Ajax, Hector, Gilgamesh, William Wallace, Leonidas, 3 roman legions, Patton, the entire u.s third Army, and 4 f-22 rapiers with tankers to help me. blade dies my hill as my army protects me.

 captain collius wrote:
i convince Aries, Achilles, Beowulf, Ajax, Hector, Gilgamesh, William Wallace, Leonidas, 3 roman legions, Patton, the entire u.s third Army, and 4 f-22 rapiers with tankers to help me. blade dies my hill as my army protects me.

A whale and a bowl of petunias falls on them, and crushes them along with the hill. I stand triumphant on the hi- uh, I mean, whale.

you do reliaze the third army had no fewer than 60,000 men right!

 captain collius wrote:
you do reliaze the third army had no fewer than 60,000 men right!

It was a really, really big bowl of petunias

You are stabbed by a thrown harpoon, and I leap at the whale, stab it repeatedly, and start spitting curses at it like Ahab. I then set up a whale-restaurant nearby and use the whale meat as my main dish for a soup, the blubber as fuel for cooking and oil, the bones for construction materials.
My hill. with a business!
Oh, and I also offer free petunias for customers.

After replacing the petunias with poppy's and the whale meat with rats meat I call the FDA, you are shortly closed down by them, after a hell of a bargain from a government auction I buy the restaurant and turn it into a Taco Bell, the only restaurant immune to legal actions.
My Hill, with a Taco Bell.

Some folks from Panda Express approach your Taco Bell and, "have a quick word with you"...
My Hill, with Panda Express!

Some gentleman from the little known restaurant Le Costa Nostra Spaghettioli patarea come to have a word with you, they have baseball bats.
My Hill, though I suppose I owe the Mafia something

A bomb explodes over your head, releasing a pack of molecular acid. I step over the biological soup to claim...
My Hill.

I convince zoidberg to walk up to you and kill you with his claws. My hill.

I boil the claws and serve them with melted butter.
My hill

I bribe you with tri-tip steak. Grilled in Brazil.
My Hill.

I set Flesh Hounds on everyone else.

My hill.

I glue you into a steak costume soaked in holy promethium. The flesh hounds chase you down and I ignite you all in a ball of cleasning fire. My hill, and bonfire.

I bring exploding marshmellows to your bonfire.
My hill.

I bring exploding Graham crackers and exploding Hershey's chocolate, and make exploding S'Mores.
My Hill.

I just laugh and bring the omida tong with me. you die my hill.

I bring the king of obscure refferences to converse with captain collius, while they are both talking about Omida Tong (wth is that) I shoot them both in the back of the head with a good old .45 ACP hollow point.

My hill, complete with bits and pieces of brain and skull matter.

...and a few well-aimed mortar rounds later its my hill again. Now with fragments.

I hire a landscaping company to clean the nastiness off the hill, after mistaking you and your legion of pumpkins as a weed infestation they clear you, and the pumpkins off the hill. After they plant the petunias I claim

My pretty hill.

I throw a pie in your face ala Spongebob Squarepants.

My hill.

Too bad it was Pumpkin pie. A Pumpkin-headed killer scarecrow eats your brains.
My hill.

To see who you are dealing with, go to
www.jasonswoods.com and go to the videos. Watch the one called The Return of Frank.

I arrive with the army that conquered the world...my hill.

See my signature and look up Ionian Hetairoi for the details.

The hill, after decades of the suffering that has been inflicted onto, decided that it had enough and became a volcano, incinerating your entire army.
Luckily for me, I decided around that time to cross myself with a salamander, making myself immune to lava. My hill..er, Volcano.

I call upon poseidon he raises up the sea calms the volcano and knocks you off into the ocean. MY hill.

And then Zeus zaps you for impertinence, and Hades drags you down into hell. My hill.

 Castiel wrote:
And then Zeus zaps you for impertinence, and Hades drags you down into hell. My hill.

A Wild Kratos appears!
Kratos uses mary-sue bs!
It's super effective!
Zeus, Hades, and just about every other god in existence fainted.

My hill.

I'm and atheist, and destroy him with science. He vanishes in a puff of logic My hill.

Audit!
You have not paid your taxes!

Off to jail with you.
My hill.

Transferred by the Imperial Administration to the Blood Ravens Chapter.

My hill.

The Blud Rahvens are declared heretics by the Inquisition due to their severe kleptomania.

My hill.

The Emperor says otherwise. My hill.

The Emporers Children say otherwise. My hill.

My cyclonic torpedoes say otherwise. My hill.

An ultramarine with fluff armor says otherwise

I tell the Ultramarine that it's in the Codex Astartes to give me the hill.

My hill.

Matt Ward rewrites your codex. My hill.

Jervis Johnson puts Matt Ward to sleep with his Standard Bearer monthly snorefest in WD. My hill.

DOOMFART successfully overthrows the mods, you are too busy dealing with it so I run up and claim
My Hill.

The mods strike swiftly with the hammer of ban. I reclaim the unoccupied hill and fortify it with 8 essential vitamins and iron.

... which are actually the polio virus, disguised as essential vitamins. Encased in a biohazard suit, I walk up to...
My Hill. And spray it with more lethal diseases.

I walk up in a CDC biohazard suit, and promptly pimp slap you off...
My Hill.

I call in an artillery barrage. My hill.

Your own artillery then bombards you again. The crewmen were offered more money than you gave them.
My Hill.

Using my own artillery, I call in a counterbattery strike on your artillery, thus destroying it before I bombard you to smithereens.

My hill.

I point out that after several artillery barrages that there would only be a crater.

My Crater, by technicality.

I drop several thousand tons of earth onto of you in the crater, crushing you. I walk up the newly created hill. My hill.

I call in an air-strike. My hill.

After the air strike unburies me I grab a piece of shrapnel and slit your throat.
My bloody hill.

You cut yourself on the sharp schrapnel and bleed to death.
Meanwhile I make a mountain out of the hill with a few million Lego.
My hill.

Legoburner burns the lego down, killing you in a conflagration of fire and melting plastic. My hill.

My hill as you built no defences.
I quickly build a decoy hill so we both can have hills.
My hill.

Orbital strike - then 'build' a new hill. My hill.

Flying monkeys come and grab you, then drop you into a burning windmill.
My hill.

Hirenkyaku - I jump clear and kill all the flying monkeys with several rounds of Heilig Pfeil from my Spirit Weapon. Then I literally reduce you to pulp using Licht Regen. My hill.

The problem is, you guys were fighting over the decoy hill. Meanwhile, construction of my fortress has been completed, with automated defenses, mine traps, howitzers, SAM missiles, and robots loyal only to me.
My Hill.
Oh, and there is a Hydrogen Bomb triggered to detonate if I die prematurely.

I employ an army of ninjas. We break into the fortress and destroy the robots, before encasing you in concrete and feeding you through a straw so that you do not die and set off the H-bomb. My hill and fortress, now guarded by ninjas.

My pirates lay siege to your castle, and your defenses crumble under the might of my cannons. My hill.

I cuddle your pirates so they refuse to fire upon me out of gratitude. My hill.

I distract you with a bright shiny thing. My hill.

The pirates steal your shiny thing! My hill.

The pirates steal you. My hill.

I swallow my tongue, committing suicide and setting off the H-Bomb. A Hyperion New-U station reconfigures me, and I walk over to claim...
My Crater.

 Dr. Temujin wrote:
I swallow my tongue, committing suicide and setting off the H-Bomb. A Hyperion New-U station reconfigures me, and I walk over to claim...
My Crater.

"Handsome Jack here. Heard you were a vault hunter. That's too bad...for you that is. For me, its going to be hilarious! I took the liberty of implanting a fusion explosive in you after you got rezzed. Enjoy the fireworks, I certainly will."
...Now why the feth didn't he do that in the game? Or at least, stop you from rezzing? The whole existence of the New-U machines baffle me. Not well implemented into thegame at all.

Anyway, I digress...My hill.

Hmm... yes, I have wondered that myself...
While Handsome Jack and yourself are busy laughing at my death, the Vault Hunters arrive, kick your asses, and somehow fix the New-U station so I arrive, without the fusion bomb.
My Hill. And Having a Tea Party, drinkin' mah tea!