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You're going to wait a bit longer, I'm afraid. I do feel like the story is really moving along though. All of this set up is about to pay off!

Captain Quip walked alone through the halls of his ship. He was lost in the thoughts of future conversations as his body carried him to the shuttle that waited for him. The walk took fifteen minutes but to him it seemed like he had blinked only once before arriving. After that last blink he paused to regard the shuttle that was warming up before him. He grinned as he thought of all of the missions he had run with that piece of junk. The Final Wisp was its current name, but that changed every time he was spotted doing something illegal in the Imperium.

At the loading ramp Thead and several other Kroot were clicking and twitching at one another as they entered. Quip only understood a handful of Kroot phrases but it was physically impossible for him to say anything in Kroot other then “Go Away!” which sounded to him like a sneeze.

Fybblywhyp attempted to take a step forward when his palms began to sweat and he went rigid. He was instantly agitated as he stood unable to move any muscle in his body. He gritted his teeth as he tried to force his way out of it. His eyes began to rapidly blink and he slowly regained control of his upper body. He closed his eyes and concentrated.

“You’re almost there Captain,” a sweet voice said from behind him. He could feel the light touch of finger tips on his shoulder.

The Captain began to growl as he strained. Suddenly he lurched forward. His body was once again under his own control and he panted for several seconds before turning to see Sithri patiently waiting behind him. The small beautiful woman wore her usual black leather tunic, black cape, and black combat fatigues. An excessive number of straps and buckles adorned the outfit. A simple gray bag was hanging over one shoulder.

“You really are improving Captain,” her silky voice purred.

“It only took me ten years to get this far,” he said as his grin returned. She returned the gesture with a simple nod and a sinister smile. Her amber eyes demanded his attention for a fleeting moment. Captain Quip was about to ask what she was doing when she turned back towards the hanger entrance. The quiet sounds of drones approached.

Six floating drones entered the hanger surrounding a robed figure. The robes were brown and non-descript. His face was hidden beneath the heavy fabric.

“Fybblywhyp,” he said with a raised hand to interrupt any spoken words. The dark leathery cracked skin of his palm was briefly seen before disappearing beneath his robes, “before you lecture me again about my importance, I must tell you about…” he began with his high pitched voice.

“Yes you can join me Jecht,” the Captain spoke over him.

Jecht fumbled and swallowed the next few words before giving pause. He was clearly caught of guard by the Captains willingness to allow the ships lone navigator to leave.

“Thank you Captain. I brought my drones and asked Sithri to join me as added protection.”

“Very wise as always Jecht,” the Captain said with a nod. He then stepped back and motioned for them to pass. Sithri and Jecht walked towards the shuttle with the hovering drones.

The Captain took a deep breath as he watched them board the vessel. Those two individuals had been paramount to his success over the years. Jecht was the sole reason he was able to traverse the warp. Something that O’Foosho and every Tau captain were very envious of. Sithri, well Sithri was a psyker that scared the heebees out of him. Her mere presence was often all that was needed to make negotiations go his way and more then once she had saved his life.

Despite all of her value he often wanted to get rid of her completely. Psykers were dangerous. He had seen what they were capable of. Yet every time an opportunity presented itself that would get him as far away from her as possible he resisted. Not only was she part of his crew but she reminded him of his past well before all of the smuggling.

A chill passed over his body as the screams of his dying wife and kids bubbled up inside of him. He clenched his fists and fought his tortured memories. Tears welled up in his eyes. He felt the red ring on his finger and concentrated on it. The screams dissipated and the parting images of the black ships and burning continents scampered out of his mind.

A lone tear slid down his cheek as he regained his composure. He realized he was staring at the deck ahead of him. He glanced to his left and right to see if anyone had seen him. He was alone in the hanger besides the waiting ship, at least he thought. He hesitated after the first step as he met the amber gaze of Sithri who waited at the base of the ramp.

She knew his past. Whether he wanted her to know or not, she knew. For the longest time it pissed him of to no end but now, now he felt sorry for ever having to share his burden.

Tau... not dying... not sure if i can agree with this. Kroot and drones everywhere?! people with character.. will that guy get his date?! To many subplots i say.

Sithri can stay... the rest have got to go.

Jeez, i didn't realize my little tangent here would cause so much distress. I'll have to get on with it and get back to some marines eh?

Or plenty of violence?

Personally, I feel that the tangent story is too different from the rest of the novel. Up to this point it has been a gritty marine story, while this new development is lighter and something of a more "slice-of-life" story. We have been following the same group of marines around, and to have new characters (that I assume you will want to develop more) pop in gives the reader a bit of literary whiplash. I think at this stage of the first story that its too late to add in characters, especially the varied cast we have on Quip's ship. Also, regarding the names, I feel they're a bit silly, though that does fit with the more light hearted storyline.

If I might make a suggestion: Close the arc that the Ice Angels are in now, then end "Book One". Keep Captain Quip & Co., but shift them to "Book Two" of your story. This will allow you to start fresh, so to speak, and have the focus on this crew, if that was a direction you wanted to head into.
You could do something of a twin storyline, One with Quip, the other with marines, and throughout the book slowly bring them closer together until the storylines overlap and entwine.

I don't mean to offend in any way, and Im still loving your writing. Merely wanted to throw my 2 cents in. ^^

 Ramos Asura wrote:
Personally, I feel that the tangent story is too different from the rest of the novel. Up to this point it has been a gritty marine story, while this new development is lighter and something of a more "slice-of-life" story. We have been following the same group of marines around, and to have new characters (that I assume you will want to develop more) pop in gives the reader a bit of literary whiplash. I think at this stage of the first story that its too late to add in characters, especially the varied cast we have on Quip's ship. Also, regarding the names, I feel they're a bit silly, though that does fit with the more light hearted storyline.

If I might make a suggestion: Close the arc that the Ice Angels are in now, then end "Book One". Keep Captain Quip & Co., but shift them to "Book Two" of your story. This will allow you to start fresh, so to speak, and have the focus on this crew, if that was a direction you wanted to head into.
You could do something of a twin storyline, One with Quip, the other with marines, and throughout the book slowly bring them closer together until the storylines overlap and entwine.

I don't mean to offend in any way, and Im still loving your writing. Merely wanted to throw my 2 cents in. ^^

No offense taken. I love the feed back. I can see where you are coming from, but this little tangent is a side effect of my ever evolving writing progress. Captain Quip and his crew will become very important here shortly and they'll help actually end my first book which in turn will set up book two! When my rough draft of book one is all done, I'd most likely introduce Captain Quip WAY earlier in the story so that you don't get such a solid chunk of him at once. That was actually the plan from the get go but I was incredibly focused on the Ice Angels that I couldn't get my creative juices to drum up anything else. The problem I've run into now is that I can't finish the Ice Angel section without bringing Captain Quip up to speed. Once I finish book one I plan on doing a massive edit and rearrange so that Quip's story line is intermingled a bit more.

I don't have that many funny names do I? I only have one more awesome one to reveal, then I'm done. I SWEAR!

Slight side note. Lets say I finish book one. I then rearrange and edit book one. What should I then do with said book? Should I go back and redo everything I've written in this thread? Or repost the entire story at the end of wherever this thread is at that time? Should I just post a link to download the file of it all? Should I start a new thread and post the entire story out? I know I'm getting a bit head of myself but the end is closer then you all think!

That does make a lot of sense. And I guess not too many, but the ones you have are quite silly Fybblywip Quip, O'Foosho... But like I said, they do work in the atmosphere.

As to what to do with it later, I definitely would like to see an edited and "improved" version all together. I think the best way would be to have a file all compiled together available for download.
if you do decide to post out the whole story, I wouldn't do it in this thread, as I think that this thread is more of a place where we get the story piece by piece.
Create a new thread if you want to pop the whole thing up. Otherwise let us download it ^^

Holy crap! I have today off and the house all to myself. I decided to sit down and do some writing. 10 pages later! Prepare for a massive entry in the VERY near future. Get excited!

Excitement gathered.

Elsy’vesith was an ancient ruined labyrinth that countless races had investigated and built upon. When the Tau had arrived an abandoned Imperial outpost became the beginning point for their small trading outpost. Now the station was a sprawling maze of compartments each connected by shuttle tubes or long halls that vehicles traversed so they could quickly move between the ancient chambers built within the rock of the broken moon.

After docking and disembarking Captain Quip and his conglomeration of escorts headed straight into the commons, an oblong room that was attached to every other major center of the station. Along the way O’Foosho had requested a meeting with his usual verve. As the party past through a maze of bulk heads and past a Fire Caste security check point they finally arrived in the commons.

The chamber was full of people of all races. Lines were formed by the various exits as tau, humans, slaan, zentaurs, and kroot alike waited for the hover trans to return or waited for the Crawler Tour to start its daily run around the outside of the station. Tau Fire Caste security held several check points and hundreds of drones hovered above the crowds.

In the center of the chamber, around several kiosk map drones, a Riptide stood tall. The dark brown suit occasionally turned to look around the room. It dwarfed everything around it; even the vehicles that carried dozens of people at once looked small next to the armored behemoth.

Seeing the Riptide along with so many drones made Captain Quip pause, it was very rare to see this kind of security at the trading center. Then again, Elsy’vesith was substantially more crowded then usual. Scenarios as to what could cause such an influx of traders came to mind as a shout pierced the nearby crowd.

“Here he comes Captain,” Sithri stated well before anyone could see the portly Tau.

O’Foosho was floating forward in a reclined chair drone. Several drones flanked him with cool refreshments. A dozen Tau in dark brown fatigues jogged around him forming a perimeter that soon included Captain Quip and his escorts.

“El’Quip, it is SO good to see you. It truly has been too long,” O’Foosho began with large hand gestures that almost looked like he was trying to fly.

“Indeed,” Captain Quip responded with a bow. Despite the flamboyant behaviors of O’Foosho, he always paid him as much respect as he could muster. O’Foosho did lead the entire water caste for this sector, which often meant Captain Quip was employed in one way shape or form by the heavy set Tau.

“PAH, enough of that,” he said with a dismissive hand wave. “Come come come, you and your crew are all welcome at my tower for as long as you’re staying. We have much to chat about and I have a fresh shipment of Wasa’Voo.”

Before Captain Quip could even respond, the floating Tau turned and headed towards a lavish hovership that several score of people could comfortable embark upon. Along the way, a member of the Tau fire team handed him a tablet drone. The flat device gave out command codes and keys for all of Captain Quip’s crew so they could all enter and enjoy the hospitality of O’Foosho freely.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The grinding sounds coming from the wall grew in volume and pitch as the Dark Eldar poured through the hole where the doors used to be. Shu-Takii with his Volkite Cannons and Zaduga with Barru’s missile launcher fired into their midst. Shar-Takazz leapt into action engaging the few that survived the initial heavy weapons fire. Nillahfin patiently waited taking shots to help cover Shar-Takazz. Razzik stood with his shield up and watched.

In the first seconds scores of Dark Eldar had perished but they kept coming and Shar-Takazz was forced to fall back. The volkite cannons floated high above Shu-Takii’s head to fire down into the incoming xenos. Fire was now burning all around the blasted door and along the corpses of their enemies.

The smell of weapons discharge and burning flesh quickly thickened in the air. Razzik saw cracks beginning to form along the wall on opposite sides of the blasted door. They would be through in less then a minute.

Nefas was suddenly at his side modifying his gun with amazing speed.

“I’ll handle this side Captain,” he said as the barrel in his gun tripled in size and a belt dropped out from his back pack. Razzik responded by shouting and charging to Shar-Takazz’s side.

“FOR THE MANTLE AND CAPTAIN RUUSA!” he bellowed as he crashed into a group of heavily armored Dark Eldar that had gotten around the whirling form of Shar-Takazz. The white helmed black armored Eldar carried long curved blades with multiple grips along the dull side of the blade. They were incredibly fast and agile like everyone in the Dark Eldar race, but just like their rest of their xenos kind, they died quickly within the powerfist of Captain Razzik.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Fybblywhyp stood outside the orange and teal hovership listening to O’Foosho brag about his trading exploits while his guards and drones loaded up the vessel. Thead and his Carnivores sniffed the air and paced nearby. Sithri was speaking with one of the Tau Fire Warriors with Jecht and his guard drones standing right behind her.

The sounds of O’Foosho began to blend into the ambiance of the room as Quip scanned the vast chamber before them. He spotted groups of his crew efficiently moving about their business, boarding various vessels, and chatting with traders. At one of the cargo control desks he saw his daughter along with Zim and their guards. He swelled with pride as he noticed the confused look from the Tau water cast employee and the wide smile coming from his daughter.

O’Foosho began to lift into the air as the hover drone he sat upon raised up to enter the craft. Quip watched the chair drone enter along with several Fire Warriors. He turned back to his own crew to gather them in when he saw Blind Jecht, the navigator, pointing out into the crowd with a sense of urgency. With his other hand he tugged on Sithri’s tight leather sleeve.

Captain Quip tried to spot what he was pointing at but he didn’t see anything out of the ordinary.

Sithri was listening to the old navigator before she turned to look past Jecht at Quip. She shook her head in confusion.

“Jecht, what are you so excited about?” Fybblywhyp asked as he approached. Thead stalked nearby to listen in.

“No, it can’t be. It isn’t possible. How could that show up? Was it always like this?” Jecht was rambling incredibly fast. “We should leave. Nothing good could come from this.”

Fybblywhyp concentrated on the robed navigator before meeting Sithri’s gaze. She looked just as confused as he felt.

“Captain,” Jecht shouted as he spun around and got within inches of his face. Thankfully his heavy robe covered all of his face except his mouth. His breathe smelled of cinnamon and dough. “Something is happening. We have to seek shelter immediately!”

“What are you talking about?”

Jecht growled with frustration, knowing that they couldn’t see what he could see with his third eye. “I can’t explain it but something is about to break through the fabric of space in this chamber. “

“Have you seen anything like this before?”

“Only in my nightmares,” Jecht frantically responded.

At this point Jecht was nearly hysterical and Captain Quip was scanning the room trying to find some clue or hint as to where this tear in space could appear. Thead and his carnivores were already loosening weapons and preparing themselves for anything. This in turn alerted the Tau Fire Warrior Guards.

“El’Quip,” the mellifluous words of O’Foosho came from behind him, “What is going on?”

* * * * * * *

“It’s opening!” Shu-Takii shouted as he picked up the unconscious form of Barru. The crystal above them was casting shades of teal and turquoise as a black curtain appeared as a line from the crystal to the floor. It was only as wide as a hair at first but it was steadily growing.

Captain Razzik didn’t have time to extrapolate the speed in which it was opening. He was busy fending off the nearly endless stream of Dark Eldar that were screaming into the room.

To his left the sounds of grinding stone ceased as a drill bit the size of an astartes chest burst through the wall. It pulled back and was replaced by giant claws that began to tear down the stone wall. Nefas targeted the opening and fired four grenade sized shells in rapid succession through the hole. Beams of bright light flashed from the hole as one the claws fell into the room without the rest of the body.

“Pain engines are coming through the walls Captain,” Nefas hissed as he adjusted the belt feed for the next four rounds.

Captain Razzik blocked another two strikes from the long blades of his opponents as he protected Shar-Takazz’s flank. The lightning claw and plasma pistol that Shar-Takazz held were both smoking from use and his armored form was covered in deep scratches and embedded shards from Dark Eldar weapons.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“THERE!” Sithri spat as she pointed to a point near the Riptide.

O’Foosho and everyone else looked in that direction to see a floating crystal seem to pierce reality and hover perfectly still in mid air. The map kiosk drones and the Riptide were both oblivious to the crystal at first but a Fire Warrior beneath it pointed up to it and within seconds a wave of alertness washed over the Tau of the fire caste.

“We need to clear this room immediately,” Captain Quip stated as he looked away from the crystal at the groups of his crew scattered around the giant room.

“But El’Quip, we don’t know what it is or even what is does,” O’Foosho began as he pressed several runes on his floating chair. “Perhaps this is another of Elsy’vesith’s mysteries opening up before us.”

“Nothing good comes from these Captain, nothing.” Jecht reiterated as his voice trailed off. He rubbed his hands together anxious as to what may come next.

“We should clear the room O’Foosho until we know what we’re dealing with,” Captain Quip demanded as he spotted his daughter from across the room.

“Bah!” he dismissed with a hand wave, “Let us see what happens shall we,” O’Foosho said as he floated his chair up to get a better view over everyone’s heads.

Captain Quip gritted his teeth and quickly alerted his entire crew through his wrist communicator. He saw heads turn throughout the room as the various crew members acknowledged the message and quickly began to head towards the shuttle bays.

“Let’s get out of here,” Captain Quip commanded to his companions.

Sithri and the Kroot were all taking their first steps when Jecht cried out, “IT’S TOO LATE!”

A black beam shot from the crystal straight towards the floor. It stopped at the floor and began to widen like a curtain opening at the beginning of a show. People nearby began to back up cautiously. The Riptide stepped away as its weapons loaded themselves. The handful of Fire Warriors took cover behind several drone kiosks.

The first thing through the portal was a floating skull. It hovered near the crystal. Guns from across the room trained on the skull and waited but before commands could be given it reversed back into the black wall.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Atmospherics check out Captain,” Shu-Takii stated as he hefted the body of his fallen comrade.

“Get to the curtain and out as soon as we can fit!” Razzik commanded as he began to fall back. The Dark Eldar were still pushing forward. Streams of fire bounced off his armor and off his shield. To his left Nefas was firing his last group of shells at the next pain engine that was squeezing through the wall. The grinding noise on the far side of the room was stopping.

Nillahfin got up from his crouched position and moved towards Shu-Takii and the curtain as a screeching orb came out of an unseen weapon. It hit the brightly glowing grenade that was providing the protective light in the room.

A single blink later and they were plunged into darkness.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Fybblywhyp pulled up an open link to his crew members on Elsy’vesith and on his ship. “This is your Captain, red alert. Commons has been breached by an unknown force. Everyone back to the ship!”

The voice of Kavu was the first to respond, “What was that?” he casually asked.

“Kavu get my ship to combat alert NOW!” He wasn’t in the mood for his back talk.

The curtain was widening at an alarming speed. Across the oblong room people stared dumb founded by the bizarre appearance of the wall and crystal, only Fybblywhyp’s crew were moving away. At least until the first poisonous shard pierced the curtain and embedded itself in the chest of a nearby trader.

As the Tau grasped at the shard and looked around in shock, a heavily armored form slumped through the curtain.

Captain Quip gasped at the sight of the fallen space marine. He was the only one in the entire room that had seen one in real life. The Tau were aware of their existence but only Fybblywhyp had seen what they were capable of.

He raced over to O’Foosho and shook his chair violently. The floating drone purred in agitation as it tried to keep the leader of the water caste level, “FIRE EVERYTHING INTO THAT PORTAL!”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

After Shu-Takii tossed Barru through the curtain he turned around to help Zaduga. Nillahfin covered them both at the very edge of the darkness. Shar-Takazz continued to back up at Razzik’s side when a Dark Eldar flipped over them both. The tightly armored Eldar wielded a chained segmented sword and a curved dagger. Skulls and bones were woven into his lavender cloak.

At the site of this figure the Dark Eldar pushed the attack, heedlessly throwing themselves at the space marines. Razzik side stepped a downward slice away from Shar-Takazz. He could have slain the white helmed Eldar but instead took the split second to see what the cloaked xenos was doing.

Nillahfin was falling back through the curtain with several deep gashes in his chest and helmet.

Shu-Takii was grasping Zaduga and was about to push him through the curtain as the Dark Eldar kicked aside Zaduga’s bolt pistol with impossible speed.

Razzik took a cut to the leg as payment for his distraction. He had let the sight pull him away from the immediate threat. He cursed his failure to concentrate as an unknown weapon round passed between him and Shar-Takazz. The blast vaporized a row of Dark Eldar all the way back to the door.

“That came from the curtain,” Razzik said to himself.

Both Razzik and Shar-Takazz leapt away from the curtain towards Nefas. Razzik turned to see the cloaked Dark Eldar’s segemented sword tighten up to form a solid blade. He then plunged it through Shu-Takii’s chest.

Zaduga was prone next to Shu-Takii. The volkite cannons fell to the ground at the death of their user.

The Dark Eldar stood near the curtain and smiled at the three standing marines. Weapons fire erupted from the curtain behind the Eldar, but he seemed to not mind. The unknown weapons fire tore through the other xenos behind him but it only seemed to excite them. The survivors ran at through curtain. A pain engine pushed through the wall towards the opposite side of the curtain to vanish within its black depths.

Razzik eyed the Dark Eldar. He could sense the marines at his side. He could almost taste the fury that Shar-Takazz was emitting at the loss of his squad mates. He whispered through his vox, “We must get through that curtain.”

The Dark Eldar continued to smile as he gracefully fell into a combat stance. Shar-Takazz growled and leapt at him. Nefas moved to flank and Razzik charged forward with his shield and white clenched powerfist.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The fire power that a Tau force could muster was a sight to marvel at but the fear of seeing a space marine still chilled Captain Quip’s bones. Two dozen fire warriors, forty or so traders, and the lone Riptide fired at the curtain from opposite sides. Drones were entering the chamber and heading towards the black portal.

The return fire was sporadic at first but then a floating twisted aberration exited the portal on the side opposite the Riptide. People screamed and fled at the sight. The Fire Warriors stood their ground at first, but when their weapons seemed incapable of slowing it down, they too began to retreat.

Finally the Riptide’s missiles took down the floating beast, but this distraction allowed many screaming men and women to exit the portal and into the front ranks of Fire Warriors.

Captain Quip watched the unfolding battle but couldn’t get the image of the space marine out of his thoughts. He ignored the incoming messages from his officers. He forgot about his daughter and his crew as fear gripped him. It was a primal fear that shook him to his core.

The memories of a red armored space marine walking through fire paralyzed him. The red armored marine was ignoring the fire that burned all over the building and around him. He stepped up to Fhybblywhyp and looked down upon him. He felt like a child at the presence of the gigantic engineered super human, “We’re taking your wife and children,” the marine said in a deep voice, “if you refuse,” he paused and leaned closer, “millions will suffer.”

Fhybblywhyp couldn’t move or speak, he could hardly think.

A distant voice trickled into his dream like state, the voice was familiar. “Captain,” it whispered. “Captain, come back to me,” it demanded. Finally the memory broke as his genitals exploded with pain.

He was curled on the floor holding himself, rocking back and forth. Sithri stood over him.

“Sorry Captain, you didn’t respond as quickly as I would have preferred,” she said over the din of gun fire.

Captain Quip grunted in pain, “did you have to kick my first mate?”

She gave him her usual sinister smile, “it worked didn’t it?”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The Dark Eldar ducked under Shar-Takazz’s lightning claw upper cut and stabbed him in the side. Shar-Takazz stumbled into another Dark Eldar and they both fell through the curtain.

The cloaked Dark Eldar broke apart his sword back into its segments and sent them wrapping around Nefas’ gun. When the Eldar yanked it back, the gun fell into shredded pieces. Nefas screamed in defiance as he slashed with his combat blade. The Dark Eldar laughed and deflected the angry slash.

Razzik then barreled into the Dark Eldar and they slid across the floor. He tried to get a hold of the Dark Eldar with his powerfist so he could crush the life out of the xenos scum but the Eldar was simply too fast. He was always able to dodge, block, or parry any attempt he made to reach him. Before they could slide to a halt the Dark Eldar threw the heavier astartes off of him. He passed through the curtain and crashed to the floor on the other side.

On this side, Dark Eldar were fighting Tau, humans, and kroot in a massive chamber. A space marine hand was dangling through the curtain in front of him. The hand wasn’t moving but Razzik grabbed it and pulled with all of his strength.

The collapsed form of Shu-Takii and his deactivated cannons were pulled through the curtain. To his right Zaduga dragged himself through. Captain Razzik didn’t know how the marine was still alive.

It sounded like Dark Eldar were still pouring through the other side of the curtain. Razzik attempted to determine what to do next when he was knocked over as the flying form of Nefas exited the curtain right into him. The two of them tumbled to the floor. Nefas was on top of him and was motionless. Razzik didn’t have time to examine him before the smiling cloaked Dark Eldar casually walked through the black wall. Other Dark Eldar ran past them towards the scrambling Tau.

The cloaked Dark Eldar stepped onto Nefas with one leg which in turn pushed down on Razzik. In perfect high gothic he spoke, “You would have had so much fun in my gladiator pishhhhh.”

His sentence was interrupted by the swift foot of a giant mechanized suit that punted him back through the curtain. Razzik, at first, thanked the Emperor. He then regarded the massive suit that stood before him. It pointed a gun the size of a rhino APC down at him when a thought came to Captain Razzik. He pointed at the crystal and shouted. “SHOOT THE CRYSTAL!”

He hoped it understood his words.

The small camera like head of the suit swiveled over to the crystal. It brought its massive gun to bear and in a flash the crystal ceased to exist along with the wall of blackness.

Oh man, Oh man, Oh man.

Holy feth....

Dude, that was awesome! so many perfect points in that passage! I laughed at fibb getting his "first mate" kicked, I was sad to see another marine fall.

Then the riptide kicking the gak out of that DE was the cherry on the cake!

Thanks Knightley! I enjoyed writing that passage, there are a lot of great visuals, that's for sure.

That was a spectacularly engineered little bit of writing. Hopefully, Tau died and the cycle will be complete!

I hope it was worth the wait. I do wonder why you hate the Tau so much.

Very well done, I'm really liking the Tau characters. Don't listen to Gitsplitta, keep the Tau!

Actually... if just fizzywiggwhatzits would bite it... or perhaps have his name legally changed to something sensible... I'd be OK with it.

Thanks Mr. Nobody. Sorry Gitsplitta, Fybblywhyp is turning out to be a good character. I may keep him around for awhile. I may also be saying that just to spite you, lol.

HEY! Somebody post a response so i can put up more story without an auto update!

Must post quicker!

Captain Razzik stood passively amongst the bodies of his comrades. The battle quickly faded around him as the Dark Eldar were out gunned by the Tau and the other forces in the vast chamber. The giant mechanized suit before him kept its rectangular barreled cannon aimed at him while he watched.

“If I die before the hands of my enemies,” Razzik began to recite a verse from the litany of death to himself as the suit vigilantly watched him and his gaze returned to the large weapon.

Razzik studied his HUD while he recited the words. His armor had sustained multiple breaches but his iron halo was still functioning. His faith in the Emperor told him it would protect him, but he wished it wouldn’t need to be tested verse the cannon that was held before him.

According to his HUD Barru, Nefas, and Nillahfin had succumb to their regenerating coma’s. Shar-Takazz and Zaduga were both conscious but heavily wounded and laying on the floor. Shu-Takii was their only loss.

As the minutes rolled by the number of guns aimed at Razzik steadily increased. He was soon surrounded by a mixed force of Tau, humans, and other xenos he had never seen before. They all kept their distance and formed a large circle around him and the tall Tau battle suit.

Finally a smaller battle suit leapt over the wall of warriors into the circle. It was still taller then Captain Razzik but substantially smaller then the giant suit he first encountered. It was the same dark brown as the others but it had additional stripes painted on the camera like head and chest. A gun was strapped to each of its arms and a cluster of antennas were clustered on one of its shoulders.

It moved gracefully across the floor towards him. When it was within three paces it stopped and raised up one of its weapons.

Razzik continued to stand casually.

* * * * * * * * * *

Fybblywhyp stared at the astartes. From his vantage point he could easily see the ever increasing ring of guns that surrounded him. Quip had stood silently watching the battle unfold while trying to control the emotions that boiled inside of him. O’Foosho hovered nearby and was speaking Tau into one of his communicator devices when several phrases tore Fybblywhyp’s gaze away from the space marine.

“You’re going to do what?” Fybblywhyp asked as he reached for O’Foosho’s chair drone.

“Think of it El’Quip! We have a live space marine. One of humanities finest warriors! We could learn so much from it.” O’Foosho excitedly rambled on while Quip shook his head adamantly. Seeing his head shaking O’Foosho turned his chair to look directly at Captain Quip.

“How can this NOT benefit the Greater Good?!” O’Foosho loudly retorted.

The question echoed around the two of them. Fybblywhyp took a step back as his mind raced. He looked left to see Blind Jecht and Sithri. The psyker nodded her head. She knew what he had to say. He looked back to O’Foosho when he heard hurried footsteps from his right.

“Father,” Sybyl said as she burst through the crowd. Her guards were right behind her and she looked unharmed.

“I told you to get back the ship,” he quietly spat as she hugged him.
“We were cut off by the Tormenters and I can handle myself just fine,” she said with a cocky grin.

Fybblywhyp glared at her with look she had rarely seen. She took a step back, confused by his reaction. Without further comment he turned back to O’Foosho.

“O’Foosho,” he took a deep breath,” you do NOT know what you’re dealing with,” he began.

The floating Tau waved his hands dismissively and looked around, unphased by his words. He attempted to turn his chair drone away when Captain Quip grabbed it with both hands and pulled at it so he could get closer to the leader of the water caste. O’Foosho’s guards raised weapons at the disrespectful display.

“LISTEN TO ME!” he shouted.

Taken back by the sudden change of mood by one his favorite traders O’Foosho waved off his guards and looked at Quip.

“If you harm those astartes, the others will find out. It doesn’t matter how safe you think you are. It doesn’t matter where you go. The rest of them will come for you,” Quip quickly spoke.

O’Foosho absorbed the words for a moment before quietly responding, “I know you humans are raised on stories of their powers and capabilities but most of them must be myths. They are no angels El’Quip.”

Captain Quip let go of the chair drone and looked down at the floor. He breathed heavy and clenched his fists as O’Foosho hovered nearby. The red ring on his finger caught a flicker of light and he took a side glance at his daughter before looking back at the heavy set Tau.

“No O’Foosho, they are no angels. That’s true. They are demons. Terrible creatures designed to do nothing but destroy. If you do not let them leave…” he paused as his hands trembled, “they will destroy your family, your home, and the planet you live on. AND that is not some story or some fable. THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED TO ME!”

Captain Quip was quaking with emotion. He barely could contain the hurricane of fear, anger, and remorse that stormed in his soul. Tears swelled in his eyes and hatred filled his fists. After a few silent moments he regained a miniscule amount of control over his emotions. He knew his reaction was creating a profound effect on those around him.

He heard the gasp of Sybyl and several others. He reached out to grab his daughter’s hand. She was the only thing that he had escaped with all those years ago. He couldn’t stand the thought of watching so many people he cared for taken away from him. Not again.

“Please,” he whispered as he shook his head. “How would that benefit the Greater Good O’Foosho?”

The sector leader of the water caste sat back in his chair and tapped his fingers together. He chewed his lip deep in thought. The emotional display from the most successfully trader he knew had surprised him.

For what felt like an eternity, the Tau pondered what to do. He looked over to the lone standing space marine. The black armored super human could help them better understand the human elite that often stepped in to defeat the Fire Caster when battles erupted between the Tau and Imperium, but then again, what if El’Quip was right.

“Very well El’Quip,“ he said with another hand flourish. “I agree that they should leave unharmed.”

Captain Quip sighed and visibly relaxed.

O’Foosho then smiled and leaned forward, “Where do you plan on taking them?”

Fybblywhyps eyes widened, “What?”

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Hahah, nice ending, relief followed by surprise!

I like how this part of the story is progressing

LOL! Good twist there at the end Ice. Well played.

With a twist! I'm glad you all like it.

Now just a little bit more to bring it all together and tie up a few loose ends.

Here we go!

What a twist. Nice to see here what happens.

 cormadepanda wrote:
What a twist. Nice to see here what happens.

Thanks Cormadepanda, but I have to admit, I'm confused by your second sentence. Care to clarify?

 IceAngel wrote:

 cormadepanda wrote:
What a twist. Nice to see here what happens.

Thanks Cormadepanda, but I have to admit, I'm confused by your second sentence. Care to clarify?

Err my keyboard was drunk.

Be nice to see what happens next.

O’Foosho didn’t need to explain himself once the shock of the question wore off. There was no ship faster then the Benevolent Aberration and Captain Fybblywhyp Quip specialized in trading with the Imperial worlds that bordered the Tau frontier. He was the ideal candidate for the task.

Before he left the presence of the Tau leader he snapped out a string of orders to his officers. The storm of emotions had now vanished from his façade as the job was suddenly laid out before him. Sybyl and her guards completed their trades and paid extra to have the goods moved immediately. Blind Jecht along with the majority of the other crew members still on Elsy’vesith finished their tasks and went back to the ship.

Sithri, Thead, and a score of his best soldiers stayed to meet the Space Marines that were still surrounded by the Fire Warriors.

The standing marine had hardly moved since his arrival. Even after two of his comrades slowly rose from their prone positions, he stayed passive.

As Captain Quip strode through the Commons his mind focused on what he should say to the genetically modified super humans. He wondered what approach he should take. He didn’t want to show any fear but he wasn’t sure he could hide it from the armored monstrosities. On several occasions he had to force himself to continue moving as he neared the marines. They were huge and imposing figures. Fybblywhyp would have trouble reaching to the top of their wide shoulders without the use of a stool. Their black armor was damaged and scorched, dented, and broken. Some of their injuries looked fatal yet they still stood defiantly before the masses. Xenos blood caked all of them and if he hadn’t seen one of them killed all those years ago he would have thought them unstoppable killing machines.

The marine that had been standing the entire time watched over his comrades before turning to regard Fybblywhyp. The black armored marine didn’t appear to have any weapons other then a white powerfist but that seemed to make him even more imposing. He showed no fear despite being surrounded by enemies with nothing but his fists. Captain Quip was only a few steps inside the ring of warriors but he felt like a naked child before the armored warrior before him. The Tau battle suits stepped back as Captain Quip and his posse approached.

He got as close he dared before stopping and looking up into the purple eye lens of the marine.

“Greetings space marine, I am Fybblywhyp Quip, Captain of the Benevolent Aberration.”

He paused hoping to get a response from the marine but the armored super human continued to silently stare down at him.

“Ah…. very well, I’m heading to Imperial space as soon as my ship is ready. I’m assuming you’d like to return to wherever you’re from…” Fybblywhyp thought about being a bit more diplomatic but realized it probably wouldn’t help… “So I’ll be taking you with me.”

The room was ghostly silent for the next minute until finally the marine took a final look at the battle suits and Fire Warriors around him then to Quip.

“That would be excellent. Thank you Captain Quip,” the marine gave a slight nod while his deep voice boomed.

Very pragmatic on everyone's part...

"with the Imperial words that bordered the Tau frontier"

pretty sure you meant worlds..

Hmm... to be shot, or to get a taxi ride home.. tough choice in life.