corrupt a wish!

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**snurl**

Granted. They steal your coffee maker instead.

I wish for a good stiff drink.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted. Why you wanted a 8 inch erect penis in your drink, I'll never know.

I wish my car was self-driving.

**snurl**

Granted. But it isn't very good at it at all and slams you head on into a storefront.

I wish for some lunch.

**BigWaaagh**

Granted! You get a wish sandwich. A wish sandwich is when you got two pieces of bread and you wish you had some meat...a bow, bow, bow.

I wish I could cure my golf slice.

**gruebot**

GRANTED! Your golf slice is cured however the rest of your game is terminal.

I wish I didn't have to work on the holiday...

**Lupus Mortem**

Granted YOU'RE FIRED. Enjoy the holiday.

I wish I a member of the Brotherhood Of Evil Mutants.

**snurl**

Granted. You're their mascot.

I wish to sleep.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted. You get 10 hours of sleep but don't feel rested. This is your life now.

I wish for a slice of infinite pizza

**Cream Tea**

Granted. It only regenerates if a certain person takes a bite out of it. Good luck finding him/her.

I want love.

**snurl**

Granted. A skunk has the hots for you bigtime.

I wish to revive the early Citadel pre slotta ranges.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted, but president trump bought the first year's production run and the clinton foundation has bought the second. You could bid against the chinese government for the third.

I wish to be insanely attractive

**gruebot**

GRANTED! Anyone who finds you attractive goes completely insane!

I wish my dog would clean up after himself...

**Tristanleo**

GRANTED! But you find yourself having to regularly purchase new shirts as your dog insists on using them to clean up the mess.

I wish Capcom would bring the Monster Hunter World beta to Xbox one.

**Lupus Mortem**

Granted but it's only available to people in China.

I wish aliens would invade and make me governor of the Earth.

**snurl**

Granted. Governor of Earth is considered a delicasy in alienland. You are quite popular for about 3 hours at 350°.

I wish to watch some good movies I havn't seen before.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted, but you go blind.

I wish children's toys were easier to repair

**gruebot**

GRANTED! Children's toys are now ridiculously easy to repair however it is highly illegal to do so without a Children's Toy Repair Specialist degree which takes eight years of study at the Children's Toy Repair College.

I wish T'au had psykers...

**Tristanleo**

Granted, but they are Kroot mercenaries, the powers only affect Kroot, and the models can only be taken as part of an all kroot detachments (BTW, the discipline sucks).

I wish I could teleport.

**snurl**

Granted. But you always teleport back immediatly.

I wish it would snow some more.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted, but you become cold blooded and are in a race to find the last piece of temperate land before it disappears.

I wish there was only one active programming language out there

**BigWaaagh**

Granted! It's Pig Latin.

I wish my Spanish wasn't so rusty.

**gruebot**

GRANTED! U now speak fluent Spanish but no one else does.

I wish I worked for a game company...

**snurl**

Granted. GW hires you to write the next codex. You are soon hated by all.

I wish I ran GW.

**BigWaaagh**

Granted! The wish granting powers confuse GW(Games Workshop) with GW(Gastropod Whisperers) and you now spend your days talking to snails.

I wish I could get quicker at wet blending.

**snurl**

Granted. You are very fast but not any better.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted. You are nothing

I wish more people played Team Yankee in my local meta.

**gruebot**

GRANTED! "Team Yankee" is the new nickname for Warhammer 40k.

I wish I had portal gun like Rick Sanchez...

**BigWaaagh**

Granted! It's drawn on a piece of paper...just like Rick's!

I wish my dog could wipe his own feet after going out in the yard on a rainy day.

**snurl**

Granted. But now he doesn't go outside!

I wish for my own personal cheerleading squad.

**ChargerIIC**

Granted! But they all look just like you and are far more interested than you are in advancing your relationship beyond just cheerleading.

I wish I owned a Leopard 2 tank