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Made in gb
Veteran Inquisitorial Tyranid Xenokiller





Colne, England

SAY WHAT?????

Brb learning to play.

 
   
Made in gb
Regular Dakkanaut




UK

Upon the Emporer's death, crack a joke along the lines of :
" Everyone remembers where they were when they heard the news. I myself was crouched down by the Golden Throne with my hand on the plug"
Upo the death of a sanguinary guard, say:
"I do believe in fairies, I DO believe in fairies, I DO believe in faries...."
Rub yourself against a sanguinary guard and say you found your happy thought
Call a crowed of space marines "the glory hogging poofters"
Call a dark eldar a bitch
Tell a SoB that she's been unfaithful. Using either meaning.
Ask a sister if she can light your cigarette. Especially if it's already in your mouth.
Question a commissar on whether his morale-restoring tactics should be changed.
Tell a female commissar to remove her flak armor to restore morale. No matter how effective that would be.



This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2010/05/31 23:40:26


happyguardsman 2250 Cadian 25th serving alongside conscripted Keimarchan soldiers
In Soviet Russia Valhalla lasgun shoots YOU!

Enemies of the Imperium:
 
   
Made in us
Drop Trooper with Demo Charge




Pennsylvannia

Misplace your Infantryman's Uplifting Primer while attending the annual Commisar's convention

Good to be back!

2500pts of Imperial's ready to fight

750-1000pts of Nids WIP 
   
Made in gb
Hardened Veteran Guardsman





The Odessey wrote:attend the annual Commisar's convention


fixed

1500pt-first completed 40k army
2000pts- main army, my own army with its own colour scheme and fluff, heavily converted

pelvic thrusting to glory!!!!!!

'On the subject of Cato Dharker and the 12th army group' (my try at fiction)
http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/349101.page 
   
Made in gb
Steadfast Grey Hunter





Somerset, England

Steal a commisar's uniform and pistol, then walk around camp summarily executing all staff officers...

"There's too much blood in my caffeine system!!"
Students around the world 
   
Made in ca
Pile of Necron Spare Parts




Canada

Taking a picture of the Tyranid army; with the flash on!

You can't defend against speed
1500 pts 3-5
will be 1300 pts 1-2-2
 
   
Made in gb
Eternally-Stimulated Slaanesh Dreadnought





UK

Adopt a Carnifex
   
Made in us
Tail Gunner





Somewhere

Sandyman11 wrote:Steal a commisar's uniform and pistol


fixed.....

2355 points of
2417 points of

"Are you telling me that Mister Bumpy, that old monster who lives under your bed and eats socks, is really an agent of the Orks, sending them socks, pants and all other gettups through the warp for them? Mind = blown...."
slarg232  
   
Made in gb
Lone Wolf Sentinel Pilot






Inside that little light in your refridgerator

Corennus wrote:Adopt a Carnifex


They're just like an enormous, 6-limbed, armoured death-puppy.

S_P

Fafnir wrote:What part of "giant armoured ork suppository" do you not understand?

Balance wrote:Nothing wrong with feathers. Now, the whole chicken, that's kinky.
 
   
Made in pt
Bounding Black Templar Assault Marine





Portugal

Shave with a Catachan poisoned blade;

Going on a field trip to catachan because you think the planet is a gigantic botanic garden;

Swap the comissar pistol with a water pistol and his power sword for a plastic pirate sword (wait a sec, if your a guradsmen you might actually want to DO that!)

Audaces Fortuna Juvat
 
   
Made in us
Drop Trooper with Demo Charge




Pennsylvannia

Be a Commisar, whose pistol and uniform have been stolen.... Try explaining that to high command


"uhhh, I, uhh, ate ... it?"

Good to be back!

2500pts of Imperial's ready to fight

750-1000pts of Nids WIP 
   
Made in us
Legendary Master of the Chapter





Chicago, Illinois

You accidently turn on the warp generators and engines after a successful boarding action. "Oh gak...."WARP SPEED MR SCOTTY!"

From whom are unforgiven we bring the mercy of war. 
   
Made in us
Veteran ORC







Send Sisters of Battle into close combat with Slaanesh Noise Marines.

I've never feared Death or Dying. I've only feared never Trying. 
   
Made in au
Death-Dealing Devastator






felixthecat345 wrote:
Tell a female commissar to remove her flak armor to restore morale. No matter how effective that would be.





Win. I lol'd

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/06/04 05:22:47


Blood Ravens W: 5 D: 3 L: 5
Argent Castellans: Ideating on a new non-codex chapter.
"It is only fitting that we ride into battle!"
Imperial Guard soon.  
   
Made in us
Legendary Master of the Chapter





Chicago, Illinois

Epic win is agreed good sir!

From whom are unforgiven we bring the mercy of war. 
   
Made in au
Pile of Necron Spare Parts




Melbourne, Australia

ask Marneus calgar to shake hands
ask teion why after all tht service he hasnt become a full SM
hi five slanesh
mention to a comissar tht he worships a half dead guy tht hasnt moves in thousands of years
go for a pleasant walk on armagedon wearing only a t-shirt tht says "ORKS ARE UGLY, SMELLY, AND DUMB"
wipe your mouth on a chapter banner
fart while in the company of comissar yarrik
mention to a SM he is neva gonna score with a SOB
sit on the emperors lap
oh and definatly dont propose to a dreadnought


Automatically Appended Next Post:
fly a valk into the emperos's palce and clain to be posessed by nurgle when cought :p

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/06/05 13:41:55


ULTRA - 3000pts.
CADIA - 750pts.
TAU - 500pts.
ORKS - 250pts.
TYRANIDS - 250pts.
NECRONS...Comeing Soon  
   
Made in no
Ork-Hunting Inquisitorial Xenokiller





Trondheim

Drop your pants near a Orc doctor
Have a wrestling contest with a first company terminator

Lenge leve Norge, måtte hun altidd være fri

Disciples Of Nidhog 2500 (CSM)

Order of the bloodied sword  
   
Made in gb
Hardened Veteran Guardsman





England

Foeburner wrote:
sit on the emperors lap



I Lol'd
   
Made in us
Hurr! Ogryn Bone 'Ead!





Look Behind you

Send out a buch of lil'baby guards men to disact them with there cute ness .
   
Made in gb
Purposeful Hammerhead Pilot





pelvic thrusting in awkward moments

MenOfTanith wrote:
Foeburner wrote:
sit on the emperors lap



I Lol'd


"Dear emporer, what i was for christmas....."

Grey Templar wrote:
The real reason Obi-wan said there was a "disturbance in the force" was that was the very moment Shas'o vera was born. it was so awsome and terrible it could be felt through time and across the dimensions.

"Millions of voices cried out in Terror, and were suddenly silenced"
 
   
Made in gb
Hanging Out with Russ until Wolftime







shas'o vera wrote:"Dear emporer, what i was for christmas....."
You were saying?

Got 40k Rules Question? Send an e-mail to Gwar! for your Confidential Rules Queries.
Please do not PM me unless really necessary. I much prefer e-mail.
Need it Answered RIGHT NOW!? Ring me on Skype: "gwar.the.trolle"
Looking to play some Vassal? Ring me for a game!
Download The Unofficial FAQs by Gwar! here! (Dark Eldar Draft FAQ v1.0 released 04/Nov/2010! Download it before the Pandas eat it all!)
 
   
Made in ca
Calculating Commissar






Kamloops, B.C.

Wasn't there a whole thread a while back that was nothing but people writing to "The Spayse Emprah", and then the person after the initial writer would write back as Spayse Emprah?

Moar of that Plz

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/06/05 21:10:05


Dakka Code:
DR:80+S++G++M++B++I+Pw40k00+D+++A++/areWD-R++T(M)DM+

U WAN SUM P&M BLOG? MARINES, GUARD, DE, NIDS AND ORKS, OH MY! IT'S GR8 M8, I R8 8/8 
   
Made in ca
Mutated Chosen Chaos Marine






In a Toyota, plotting revenge.

Gwar! wrote:
shas'o vera wrote:"Dear emporer, what i was for christmas....."
You were saying?

Haha! Awesome!

metallifan said: I almost wonder is "Matt Ward" another pen name for C.S. Goto?
metallifan said: The Imperium would probably love Hitler...
Play KoL! Click my sig to go to the main website and sign up!
 
   
Made in us
Crafty Bray Shaman





While in rank in file with IG, be the one guardsman in the leman russ blaring "What is war?"(the song)

 
   
Made in us
Pyromaniac Hellhound Pilot




Nucia

metallifan wrote:Wasn't there a whole thread a while back that was nothing but people writing to "The Spayse Emprah", and then the person after the initial writer would write back as Spayse Emprah?


YA! but it was called Ask the Space Emprah or something like that....Its long as hell now!

So, I was in this place people call the mall a while back. And I had the urge to expel some bad spirits. As I went into the bathroom, I chose the urinal closes to the corner so I could have some privacy. So I whip out Lord Pevincy and let him loose the bad spirits. Well, I was looking at the wall as the Lord was expelling the spirits and I seemed to have gotten distracted. Turns out, I missed a little.

SO I'm sitting at my computer right, and I have a Coke, Bottled mind you. But it got warm, so I got a Coffie cup and I filled it with the coke and some Ice and I sipped as I did my internet stuff. So like and hour passed and I hadn't sipped any of it. and when I go to sip it, I notice that something solid is in it. So I'm like, "No, why would there be something solid in my coke?" SO I pull these solid THINGS off my tongue and guess what they are? F ING ANTS! I was like WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And so I ran into the Kitchen coughing and what not and I threw those little bastards down the drain with a flood of hate and cold water.......those bastards are lucky I don't have my Nucians yet!!! 
   
Made in gb
Regular Dakkanaut




UK

Spray a carnifex with insect repellent.
Spill pepper into Yarrick's left eye
Just blurt out "WHY the hell don't we just copy THERE plasma technology?"


happyguardsman 2250 Cadian 25th serving alongside conscripted Keimarchan soldiers
In Soviet Russia Valhalla lasgun shoots YOU!

Enemies of the Imperium:
 
   
Made in gb
Veteran Inquisitorial Tyranid Xenokiller





Colne, England

Tell commisar NIkev that being a dog isn't likely to get you a job as a commisar

Brb learning to play.

 
   
Made in us
Storm Trooper with Maglight





bellingham

Don't tell a SOB that shes got saddlebags forming.

1950 3385 pt 1300  
   
Made in us
Drop Trooper with Demo Charge




Pennsylvannia

Gwar! wrote:
shas'o vera wrote:"Dear emporer, what i was for christmas....."
You were saying?

A juvenile equstrian, aka a pony? Who knew SM's were so luvy-dovy lol.

Good to be back!

2500pts of Imperial's ready to fight

750-1000pts of Nids WIP 
   
Made in gb
Hanging Out with Russ until Wolftime







No, a Juvenile Equestrian is a Young Person who rides Horses.

A pony would be a Juvenile Equine.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2010/06/07 20:45:00


Got 40k Rules Question? Send an e-mail to Gwar! for your Confidential Rules Queries.
Please do not PM me unless really necessary. I much prefer e-mail.
Need it Answered RIGHT NOW!? Ring me on Skype: "gwar.the.trolle"
Looking to play some Vassal? Ring me for a game!
Download The Unofficial FAQs by Gwar! here! (Dark Eldar Draft FAQ v1.0 released 04/Nov/2010! Download it before the Pandas eat it all!)
 
   
 
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