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Honestly you should have just cracked the little prat one. Then take the £41 from him. Was there anyone else in the room like a teacher if so why did they not stop it and also do your parents know that you they destroyed it.

This isn't to do with wargaming, but on the way to the school league, I nearly get hit with a car, then near the end of the year my teacher goes
"you remember when you nearly died, that was funny."

I have a couple (the first is NOT for the light hearted... you've been warned):

First, I was playing a game with my girlfriend at my FLGS on 'Friday Night Magic' night and everything is going fine... she's actually kicking my ass (and I'm grateful, as she'd been getting frustrated lately at losing so much)... and across the room there is this big guy playing Magic that keeps putting his hands down his pants and announcing it and making a big deal of it, raising his hand up and and making a big deal of touching his cards with them, etc. He is getting a few laughs from folks that know him well, but general glares from the wargamers as the guy definitely doesn't have the best hygiene (you could smell him from a couple tables over) and he keeps doing this... my girlfriend makes the gagging motion when she then starts to gag for real... I catch that her eyes wandered over and the dude lets out a scream... he had pulled his hand out of his pants and it was covered in blood! He then screams, amid his game and the rest of the games: the store goes silent as he stands up (THANKFULLY he spins...) and spins around with his back to us... DROPS HIS PANTS and screems as he almost trips himself DRIPPING BLOOD from parts unknown and hurries to the bathroom with his pants around his ankles...
My girlfriend left the room after that (as did many) and I was left to clean up and we left for the night.


Second, playing my girlfriend again... she's doing ok with her orks and I'm playing a variation of 'Draigo-wing' Grey Knights (wasn't using Draigo, just was using termies and pallies for giggles)... and this HUGE dude that most people don't like, mainly because he painted HIS orks up as confederate soldiers with racial epitaphs and his racial slurs and comments are disturbing and pretty damned uncool...

Anyway, he sees her playing orks, and so he thinks she wants to talk to him or something and plops down to tell her how to play...now I'm ok with folks giving advice and whatnot... I have no issues with folks that watch, give rules, etc. BUT I do have a problem when some dude litterally comes in and starts moving models for her (she was NOT amused at all and I could tell she was getting super-pissed... I've seen that look before >.> ) and starts touching her on the shoulder and in general being a complete ass...

Now... I'm not jealous or anything like that... we live together, we do everything together and we've been dating about 5 years and started making 'plans for the future', etc... but I got pretty pissed that he was hitting on her and creeping all over her. SO, I tell him... politely at first to settle down and let her play... I was very nice... very polite and he just stops (I think he is complying) with his 'leaning over the table and looks up at me, mid-model-moving, and says in a completely serious tone: "DAWW the wittle SPEZZ MAREEN doesn't want to wooz to you..."

This is a dude in his late 40s early 50s... HUGE and one scare away from a heart attack... and he said this to me, but having known the type of guy he was, I was expecting it. So I stood there, looked him in the eye and waited for him to stop talking. He continued like this for a few moments...

I put what I was holding down in a calm manner and said quietly: "Put her models down and let her play."

He complied quickly and sat down next to the game.

He then continued to watch us telling her how much he 'Liked her' and glaring at me...

Then he started whispering that he liked her...

She gave me a look and I knew it was time to leave or she might kill the guy if I didn't get there first... so we picked up and left without a word.

Later on, a friend of mine told me that when he saw this he thought the dude was finally gonna get 'it'... and that I got all 'scarey' on him...

I thought I underacted.

Anywho, I have a few bad-luck stories, etc, but those have been my worst experiences thus far...

FOr me it probably came when i held the tyranids new dex in my hands and saw what GW had done.

Outside of this moment it was playing against a real jerk in a tourni in LA. the individual i played agianst was really hard to deal with. argued rules, assert very biased interpretation of rules, and then ask me how great his crappy looking army looked. I flet like telling him the truth that his army looked like a six year old had painted it, but i just kept mum.

Playing the kind of people who are all happy and joyous when they stomp your army flat and suddenly get sour and ready to pack up the moment you start making a comeback THEN get all super happy and talking about how he had the entire game in his control when he BARELY squeaks out a win.

Love playing those people.

Revarien wrote:I have a couple (the first is NOT for the light hearted... you've been warned):

First, I was playing a game with my girlfriend at my FLGS on 'Friday Night Magic' night and everything is going fine... she's actually kicking my ass (and I'm grateful, as she'd been getting frustrated lately at losing so much)... and across the room there is this big guy playing Magic that keeps putting his hands down his pants and announcing it and making a big deal of it, raising his hand up and and making a big deal of touching his cards with them, etc. He is getting a few laughs from folks that know him well, but general glares from the wargamers as the guy definitely doesn't have the best hygiene (you could smell him from a couple tables over) and he keeps doing this... my girlfriend makes the gagging motion when she then starts to gag for real... I catch that her eyes wandered over and the dude lets out a scream... he had pulled his hand out of his pants and it was covered in blood! He then screams, amid his game and the rest of the games: the store goes silent as he stands up (THANKFULLY he spins...) and spins around with his back to us... DROPS HIS PANTS and screems as he almost trips himself DRIPPING BLOOD from parts unknown and hurries to the bathroom with his pants around his ankles...
My girlfriend left the room after that (as did many) and I was left to clean up and we left for the night.


Second, playing my girlfriend again... she's doing ok with her orks and I'm playing a variation of 'Draigo-wing' Grey Knights (wasn't using Draigo, just was using termies and pallies for giggles)... and this HUGE dude that most people don't like, mainly because he painted HIS orks up as confederate soldiers with racial epitaphs and his racial slurs and comments are disturbing and pretty damned uncool...

Anyway, he sees her playing orks, and so he thinks she wants to talk to him or something and plops down to tell her how to play...now I'm ok with folks giving advice and whatnot... I have no issues with folks that watch, give rules, etc. BUT I do have a problem when some dude litterally comes in and starts moving models for her (she was NOT amused at all and I could tell she was getting super-pissed... I've seen that look before >.> ) and starts touching her on the shoulder and in general being a complete ass...

Now... I'm not jealous or anything like that... we live together, we do everything together and we've been dating about 5 years and started making 'plans for the future', etc... but I got pretty pissed that he was hitting on her and creeping all over her. SO, I tell him... politely at first to settle down and let her play... I was very nice... very polite and he just stops (I think he is complying) with his 'leaning over the table and looks up at me, mid-model-moving, and says in a completely serious tone: "DAWW the wittle SPEZZ MAREEN doesn't want to wooz to you..."

This is a dude in his late 40s early 50s... HUGE and one scare away from a heart attack... and he said this to me, but having known the type of guy he was, I was expecting it. So I stood there, looked him in the eye and waited for him to stop talking. He continued like this for a few moments...

I put what I was holding down in a calm manner and said quietly: "Put her models down and let her play."

He complied quickly and sat down next to the game.

He then continued to watch us telling her how much he 'Liked her' and glaring at me...

Then he started whispering that he liked her...

She gave me a look and I knew it was time to leave or she might kill the guy if I didn't get there first... so we picked up and left without a word.

Later on, a friend of mine told me that when he saw this he thought the dude was finally gonna get 'it'... and that I got all 'scarey' on him...

I thought I underacted.

Anywho, I have a few bad-luck stories, etc, but those have been my worst experiences thus far...

I should NOT HAVE READ THE FIRST ONE.

yeah. wow. I should not have read the first one too though it makes me wonder at what the heck happened.

The second one though. ANYone that is ignorant enough to have confederate orks and make racial comments is not worth anyones time. You did the right thing.

I have been fairly lucky in not drawing crazies at games. I do have two stories though

I was playing a 40K second edition game my Orks vs Impotent Guard against an older guy maybe in his 40s. First turn I launched a couple of pulsa rokkits that landed in the middle of his tanks including his brand new armorcast baneblade. Three leman russ tanks drove off the board after the scatter so did a basilisk. His griffin was smushed by his baneblade as it drove off the board. He grabbed a handfull of my dice and threw them at me.

There is also a couple of oddball older guys who play occasionally at my FLGS. They both don't have the best hygene and one wears a laser/led light headband around, but they are nice guys. Anyway the older brother is playing against me in fantasy when he suddenly turns green and leans up against the table. I ask him if he's ok, he says he thinks he may have "gak his pants". Sure enough as he is trotting to the bathroom everyone sees a little extra weight in the seat of his pants. I help his brother pack his army up and take him home (he of course had to ride in the bed of my truck).

Playing My Orks V Chaos, getting the luckiest start ever, stealing initiative, rushing my trucks , getting maxx hits with my lootas and taking out his Deffy and demon Prince in turn 2 looking at prolly the best win over choas ever, and getting his mum turn up demanding he leave the GW shop instantly as they were getting him to his University the next morning early, Then having my large carrying case run over and broken by a guy in a wheel chair all in the same evening!, wot can I say, £$%^ing frustratin!, say no more!


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sourclams wrote:2009 'Ard Boyz semifinals in Arlington, Texas.

Round one lasts four hours (yes, four HOURS) because 2 people showed up late and the TO allowed them to start a full 1.5 hours into round one.

Then, with me in first place overall by a wide margin, the TO calls round 3 to cut short with no prior warning at the top of turn four, after I had completed my movement phase.

I have fewer table quarters and no models in the center, so I go from a near auto-win (Lash Chaos vs. footslogging Calgar/Lysander) to a minor loss, costing me the overall tournament win and a chance at Nationals. For a tournament that I had driven 6 hours to be at.

That was the first real wake-up call that I had to the state of competitive play in 40k.

Man that sucks!!, beats mine!

Another Apocalypse game, this time sooner. Good old deafie deamonplayer rocks up, with the council of darkness, who have reroll demonic instability.
He says it gives him reroll all invuns, which is tetragon of darkness. I point it out, show him the two entries in the books for them. He chucks a spazz, got really upset and packed up and walked out.

Second game with him He takes the Chosen's formation, but he doesn't bring the rules for it, figuring that the GW has it. The GW manager had thrown it out the day before as he needed the space for rulebooks and so forth for his heroquest. I told the guy that he couldn't take the Chosen's formation if he didn't have the ruleset. He got angry again, stormed out and didn't return. Hasn't returned since. Now the store has a good 2000 pt deamon force well painted, for people without armies.

I'm going to have to go with "Counts as armies". In specific there is a gentleman that runs a tau sympathizer army that is a counts as grey knights. So no unit in the army looks anything like what it is supposed to. While I'm perfectly okay with a handful of stand-ins, a whole army is a tad much. Super nice guy, but I avoid playing him like the plague.

micahaphone wrote:

I'm completely fine with proxying, but when it's done en masse like that, without any effort to help out your opponent, and he actually was indignant that I couldn't remember what was really what, that's what got to me. If you wanted your librarian to be a termie librarian, fine. If you want your dread to be ironclad, fine. Rhino a razorback, okay. But being angry that I can't remember all your proxies? Not okay.

Only instance where I approve of proxying is where someone has converted (and painted, most important factor) a special character of their own design, backstory (must be relevant and believable) and so on. Yes I'm a Fluff Bunny. But to field this unit they have to use another character's statline. Like my own personal incarnation of a Female Farseer, but I use Eldrad Uthran's rules.

Anyway, that's fine and all, but I hate it when players are Proxying whole units, tanks etc. and then they use smaller bases than the real unit uses. Suddenly that unit becomes WAY TOO NIMBLE on my terrain laden board. Not on and not fair.

Also, when proxied models are unpainted, I mean, wtf?

redkeyboard wrote:Honestly you should have just cracked the little c**t one.

Priceless. If you ever run for office, you've got my vote!

CageUF wrote:I'm going to have to go with "Counts as armies". In specific there is a gentleman that runs a tau sympathizer army that is a counts as grey knights. So no unit in the army looks anything like what it is supposed to. While I'm perfectly okay with a handful of stand-ins, a whole army is a tad much. Super nice guy, but I avoid playing him like the plague.

I run an entire Iron Warriors army using C:SM. Everything is modelled as close to WYSIWYG as possibly. I'm wondering, would you have a problem with this?

IXBEHEMOTHXI wrote:Well, this has just really p***ed me off, school club today, training for the school league, all goes well with the orks I used, alot of rules were learned, when a bunch of "Chavs" (if your british XD) come into the club, they ask what were doing and start to secretly taunt and mock us, which I can get over, when suddenly one of them picks up the monolith i was painting and "accidentally" lobs it at the wall, couldn't find even half the pieces, and now I wasted £41, so yeah, my day absolutely f***ing ruined.

kill them, kill them all get the largest knives in your kitchen then carve out there eyes and smile while you are doing so (I know I would...).


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Ssgt Carl wrote:Wow, these are some doozies. I gotta say the cheating stories always surprise me. I have been lucky enough to have almost never had anyone cheat (or at least I didn’t realize it) in about 18 years of gaming.

A few stories I can think of.
A couple years ago I was running a game at a historical convention. The ruleset I had written was intended to be easy to learn and fast paced since most games at the conventions I go to have to be taught (just about every game uses a different rule set). I made the point that in this game a tank was a tank. I know one side had models that looked like t-34s and the other side pz IV Fs, but for this game they were just tanks. After a player received a result he was unhappy with he griped for the remainder of the game about how what had happened was so unrealistic and that a t34 could never have done that against an experienced panzer crew blah blah blah and so on. Exactly the type of thing I had hoped to avoid with my lengthy pre game explanation of games vs simulations and how this was a game.

A similar event, though this one was a bit funnier, was when I was 14. By then I had 5 years of gaming under my belt and actually knew what I was doing, but most of the 40 years olds a played expected a dumb kid. I was playing a civil war game (actually another young gamer on my side, we both wanted rebs) against two older gentleman playing a game of Fire and Fury which I was pretty familiar with back then. We were handling them rather tidily and one of them began to nitpick every little thing. Every good roll we made was somehow cocked, we didn’t have line of sight because a piece of gravel was in the way and so on. He argued rather voluminously that the rules were unrealistic until the GM called it a draw. He told is after the guy left that we had actually won. More funny than annoying when I look back on that one.

Last one makes me seem like a d-bag but I am admittedly quite arrogant. My painting is not golden daemon worthy but there are a lot of painter worse than me. I had brought an army to a new game store and was proudly showing them off, my head swelling to epic proportions. One guy made it clear he was un-impressed, stating “yeah, that’s almost as good as some of mine.” My delicate ego shattered, I went look at this guys stuff. His paint jobs were fair, but (and here is where I sound most like an arrogant d-bag) they were clearly inferior to my figures. Luckily for him a weathered this slight of my honor stoically. Had I been a Space Marine I most likely would have removed his head and placed in on a stake outside the shop with a sign that read “This be the fate of all heretics who mock my Glorious Paintjobs, beloved by all.”

Yeah im like this too and I learn (or try to do so) when painting to improve.

Another just came to mind. We run an escalation league with several new 40k players. The games are just for fun and almost the entire field uses fluffy or non optimized lists. As such I was running and pretty typical 4 horseman black legion list. Well a gamer from across town shows up with his dual lash noise marine list. First thing he tries is to give his Both of his DP daemon weapons, considering this is 5th edition I find this a little alarming... After 5 rounds and me almost tabling him the game ends, it happens to be 6 kp vs 6 kp draw. He then proceeds to talk smack that I don't know how to build a list and how unlucky he was to only get a tie.




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Cerebrium wrote:

CageUF wrote:I'm going to have to go with "Counts as armies". In specific there is a gentleman that runs a tau sympathizer army that is a counts as grey knights. So no unit in the army looks anything like what it is supposed to. While I'm perfectly okay with a handful of stand-ins, a whole army is a tad much. Super nice guy, but I avoid playing him like the plague.

I run an entire Iron Warriors army using C:SM. Everything is modelled as close to WYSIWYG as possibly. I'm wondering, would you have a problem with this?

Not at all... Matter of fact I'd enjoy it. But running ig with tau bits as counts as grey knights is over then top.

This happened in my very first game of 40K ever. I was borrowing a friend's CSM army, and I was fighting... either some sort of eldar or Tau, I don't remember exactly, except that whatever army it was had Lance weapons. Anyway, the player had been playing for a while, and so I trusted he knew the rules.

At some point in the fight, he claimed that Lance weapons hit EVERYTHING in a straight line up to their max distance, not just the unit being fired at, and of course he used that to his advantage. Being a brand new player with no clue, I just took his word for it.

At some point during someone called him on it, and I was rather unimpressed. But I then proceeded to stomp his army into the dirt, so all was okay. XD Definitely an... interesting... intro to the world of 40K, heh.

Lol, my first foray into 40K was pretty good
My brother and I play the intro game together. We each get a squad of Death Guard-counts-as Tactical Squad (for simplicity), a Rhino for them to ride in, and we got to choose between a Dread with melta and DCCW, or a Pred w/Lascannons. First game, I won, with most of my squad, my Rhino, and my Pred with no turret.

The game we had right after that takes the cake. Here is what happened. For this battle, I had the Dread this time, and my bro had the Pred.

I move my Rhino up, and disembark my squad, and the squad proceeds to Rapid Fire (we were on a small table). My Dread moves up.

My bro's turn: he blows up my Rhino, I whiff my saves, and 5 of my guys die. They are subsequently brought down to 3 guys from the successive shooting.

After that sees me moving my guys, my Dread exploding the turn after the turn where my Rhino blew up, and then my guys get shot up and die.

EDIT: A large amount of grammer errors. Getting pretty tired...

Skits wrote:This happened in my very first game of 40K ever. I was borrowing a friend's CSM army, and I was fighting... either some sort of eldar or Tau, I don't remember exactly, except that whatever army it was had Lance weapons. Anyway, the player had been playing for a while, and so I trusted he knew the rules.

At some point in the fight, he claimed that Lance weapons hit EVERYTHING in a straight line up to their max distance, not just the unit being fired at, and of course he used that to his advantage. Being a brand new player with no clue, I just took his word for it.

At some point during someone called him on it, and I was rather unimpressed. But I then proceeded to stomp his army into the dirt, so all was okay. XD Definitely an... interesting... intro to the world of 40K, heh.

That was eldar then, Tau have no lances

Cerebrium wrote:

CageUF wrote:I'm going to have to go with "Counts as armies". In specific there is a gentleman that runs a tau sympathizer army that is a counts as grey knights. So no unit in the army looks anything like what it is supposed to. While I'm perfectly okay with a handful of stand-ins, a whole army is a tad much. Super nice guy, but I avoid playing him like the plague.

I run an entire Iron Warriors army using C:SM. Everything is modelled as close to WYSIWYG as possibly. I'm wondering, would you have a problem with this?

Yes the point is here thought that you have made an effort to make something tie in with its rules. I have tried to do the same thing, using Codex: BA for my pre-heresy World Eaters, and have really tried to rationalise and appropriately model each unit. I have only ever had 1 person refuse to play me on the basis my army wasn't using codex Chaos.

I think the problem most people have with 'counts as' is when whichever flavour of the month army comes out, people just start using there other models (usually with little or no modelling/painting effort) to represent those rules. It can: a) make it difficult for your opponent connecting troop types b) make the game look gak.

I have seem some truly awful proxying in my time, there is nothing worse than having your own squad of assault troopers (who represented a couple of weeks of effort) getting taken apart by a disembodied troll torso being used to represent a bloodthirster (!)

In the discussion of count as i wonder if any of you encoutered the 'base' count as army. One of my games of fantasy i faced a high elf army that was nothing but empty bases. I had to learn his army list aswell as remenber which unit was which what a headache :-(

I do remember a good time playing actually the best really i met a girl and she played dark elves. I invited her round mine for a game when half way through....well we never ended the game lmao best game ever that one

This wasn't too long ago, actually.

I had arranged a game with an aquaintance at my FLGS. 3000 Points WHFB SoM.

Due to terrible tactical decisions and bad rolling on his part and good rolling on mine, he loses 2 characters and I get a critical spell off. Granted, he was by no means finished, and on his turn, he starts making a comeback. During his magic phase, the effect of my spell kicks in and wipes out his 40-man Bloodletter horde. Despite having a large portion of his army in a good position, he immediately quits, claiming that I build OP lists.

Basically, I spent 1 hour packing and unpacking (I was playing pure Goblin O&G, so lots of stuff to pack) to play 30 minutes of a game.

BTW, next week he shows up and announces he's selling his Daemons and moving to 40K. Something about never winning...

Not quite in a game, but I was at the local gaming store, and some 7 year old and his mum were browsing the shelves of Xenos. He lectured me for an hour on false facts on 40k that he probably made up in his crib. "And dat's wot the necwons use to get from pwace to pwace." he said while pointing at a SW dreadnaught. Then he started telling me that Kroot were just firewarriors going kommando.

Luckily as he started to get towards the Slaneesh daemons (that could have gotten hairy), my mate bailed me out by saying that we had to get going because it was getting late (i.e. 3 in the afternoon, bedtime for that little creton.)

UUUGHH!

Having realized I'd forgottent the FAQ ruling of IG fliers NOT having anything off board, after being completely face rolled at a tourney by an IG player who jammed his vet-toting Vendetta into the very back corner behind my objective and troops holding it.

IXBEHEMOTHXI wrote:"Chavs"

Correct me if I'm wrong but just so I know what the terminology means for future's sake. Chav is the British equivalent of those Range-rover driving, "talk like their on Jersey Shore" spoiled brats from across the pond right?

A chav is an unsocial delinquint that believes in bling and wear either tracksuits or hoods. They normally talk like a black rapper when they most certainly are not. They hang around street.corners and are basically the most irritating lifeform in the world. If your not a chav they target you with foul language and acting tough. My friend pointed out that a chav is basically a human ork lol they speak the same language and everything. If you've seen ali g well thats a chav

ChiliPowderKeg wrote:Having realized I'd forgottent the FAQ ruling of IG fliers NOT having anything off board, after being completely face rolled at a tourney by an IG player who jammed his vet-toting Vendetta into the very back corner behind my objective and troops holding it.

IXBEHEMOTHXI wrote:"Chavs"

Correct me if I'm wrong but just so I know what the terminology means for future's sake. Chav is the British equivalent of those Range-rover driving, "talk like their on Jersey Shore" spoiled brats from across the pond right?

Not really. It's sort of a white trash wannabe gangster thing that isn't restricted to punk kids necessarily. There's the usual wacky British class stuff that makes it hard to equate directly to any equivalent in the US.

Playing really weird guy that look like he dressed right out of the Salvation Army clearance racks that was still playing 4th ed when everyone else were playing 5th. He had some really crazy lazy eye and he was getting down to check LOS of his Dark Reapers to my Fire Warriors.

He stated, "I can see your Fire Warriors."

Before I could stop myself, "Are you sure? They are over here."

You could hear crickets across the board. Then the next turn I deep struck my Crisis Suits and then flanked his Dire Avengers with my Kroot.

He screamed, "You can't put them there!"

I replied, "What? I'm playing fifth ed." He got so mad when Ageofegos pulled out the rule book and showed him that I could. When my Kroot and Crisis suits wiped out his army in the shooting phase he packed up and huffed off to his chester van and drove off trying to look cool in front of the 12 year old outside. Just sad. The guy gave me a bad vibe all around. I thought to myself after was I was glad that I was 33 at the time because I think that guy's catch phrase would be, "Strangers have the best candy."

The entire game was the most annoying game I have ever played. It was even worse than the guy that said when we were play, "Well, if you want to play by the rules. My wife lets me do it at home." WTF?!

Okay.
Theres this ex-vet at my LGS whom has quite literaly been collecting since GW day 1.
any way theres this killteam tourney going on and me and this other kid want to enter. at this point my guard army was only 1 vet squad strong and he played necrons.
so this guy hom is REALLY generous offers to give us split wise a 3K eldar army. thats 1.5K each. all old rare models.
any way it comes to the day and i walk in to my LGS. theres among other things` this woman whom ive never seen before sitting at the painting table getting to work on a lot (and i mean alot) of old rare eldar figures. anyone with half a brain can see were this is going.
so it turns out that this little peice of gak has turned up early and SOLD this entire 3K aspect warrior army of old rare figures to this woman.
needless to say both me and the Vet (whom has tought me to kill with my bare hands) are pissed off.
this kid literaly took one look at us and ran. didnt come back for 6 months.

i plan to take him down the miley(a haunted tunnel near to were i live) and introduce to him my dads 1st issue survival knife(my dad was a paratrooper in the 1st gulf war)

That bastard robbed me and i intend to make him pay.

When my former gaming group banned scarab swarms from turbo boosting as it was 'cheesy' (I'd used them in 3rd/4th to kill 8 plague marines in a rhino... back when plague marines were EVEN WORSE than now!)

Flaming_Spider wrote:

Vladsimpaler wrote:

Grimtuff wrote:
Or it could be of that legendary child called Jordan, drinker of Enchanted Blue paint...

Ok, now this one I haven't heard. Do tell.

Found the original.

Miraclefish wrote:There was a lad called Jordan who played when I first got into GW about 12 years ago. He was the archetypal Annoying Game Store Child.

He ran around, barely painted his models, picked up and broke other peoples' and kicked off when his Space Wolves didn't win everything.

After a while, when he broke a nice, kind customer's Leman Russ tank by dropping it, the staff told him he was banned from the store for a month and should take the time to think about his behaviour.

Well, Jordan wasn't having this. He ran to the modeling table to enact some sort of bitter revenge. Sadly there was naught to destroy.

But look! Paints! So Jordan reaches for a pot of Ultramarines Blue and flips the cap. Everyone steps back, fearing the pigment will fly. And then...

...he drinks it.

No, I don't know why, either. But he laughs, and runs for the door, through a sea of people frozen into inaction through confusion.

He get to the door and falters, stumbles. "I..... I don't feel well...."

We watch in silence as he staggers a few steps and clutches his stomach. He looks for a bin to throw up in. He finds none. Which leads to one of the most surreal moments of my life.

I watch a young lad sobbing quietly as he throws up blue-tainted vomit and bitter bile time and time again into the slot of an unfortunate Royal Mail postbox.

Then his mum came to collect him.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

LMAO
instantly cured MY boredom.