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...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw. Maybe it's just a good photo (my friend took it, he's a professional photographer) but I feel my jaw looks too masculine IRL. It really troubles me.

I did not expect approval! Rather, I expected others to agree it looks manface. The black-and-white was by my request as I like it that way!

Also, while the picture is quite recent, I've since got a little acne which subtracts about 100 points.

chaos0xomega wrote:

 Ashiraya wrote:
You know what, feth it. Here is a picture of me.

Spoiler:

It's a huge picture, but then, the camera was some serious hardware. Probably a good idea to open it in a new tab.

Not sure if serious, looks like a model or a celebrity, but I have no idea who...

I'm getting Princess Diana vibes.

Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:Avatar 720, I did read your message and I am just not answering right now because I want to take some time to think before answering .

It's no problem, and you don't have to answer it if you don't want to. I have no idea how the French systems work, or your personal circumstances, so most of what I've been saying might not even be applicable. My own mental health issues have plagued me for half my life, so I get quite pushy and vocal when someone even mentions that they're depressed or even just a bit down at times; put it down to me not wanting people to experience what I did by doing nothing about anything, even if they might not anyway.

Besides, this has already become a sort of 'Show Yourself' thread; we don't need it going even further off-topic into mental health and whatnot.

If acne subtratcs points, I'm at -9000.

 Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:

 Albatross wrote:
That all sounds like it's heading in the right direction mate, tbh. It's rare to get that many responses. You must have good pictures!

Well, you tell me. I just took the best pictures I had on my computer.
My profile picture

Only a few month old! By the way, do not look at the writings on the white board behind me, it is highly classified!

Mate, you could be a male model.

Why are you even posting on this thread? You're a Phd candidate with a french accent who looks like Jeff Buckley!


A world in which I'm giving advice to that guy is truly fething perverse.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
And yes, Ashiraya you look lovely.

 Ashiraya wrote:
...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw. Maybe it's just a good photo (my friend took it, he's a personal photographer) but I feel my jaw looks too masculine IRL. It really troubles me.

It's probably one of those things that you notice about yourself while nobody else pays any attention. A lot of people (most people?) have something like that, simply because you have so much time to study yourself, compare yourself to idealized standards (which may or may not exist without photoshop) and think about every little detail that might be wrong. Meanwhile another person doesn't have all those countless hours of study and just sees the whole "you" and puts the small details into context.

 Ashiraya wrote:
...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw. Maybe it's just a good photo (my friend took it, he's a personal photographer) but I feel my jaw looks too masculine IRL. It really troubles me.

I did not expect approval! Rather, I expected others to agree it looks manface. The black-and-white was by my request as I like it that way!

Also, while the picture is quite recent, I've since got a little acne which subtracts about 100 points.

acne = something makeup can easily fix. I still don't see the manface, and I think you have a very lovely jawline. More importantly, your features compliment one another and blend together very well, walking past you on the street I wouldn't even notice your jaw line as a singular defining feature (your eyes and lips are what call my attention the most personally). I think most people, although when they discuss beauty and attractiveness might point out specific features, actually care more for how all of ones features interact and compliment one another. In other words, people generally care more about the 'whole' than they do any one thing. In any case, when I saw the photo I was like

 Albatross wrote:

 Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:

 Albatross wrote:
That all sounds like it's heading in the right direction mate, tbh. It's rare to get that many responses. You must have good pictures!

Well, you tell me. I just took the best pictures I had on my computer.
My profile picture

Only a few month old! By the way, do not look at the writings on the white board behind me, it is highly classified!

Mate, you could be a male model.

Why are you even posting on this thread? You're a Phd candidate with a french accent who looks like Jeff Buckley!


A world in which I'm giving advice to that guy is truly fething perverse.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
And yes, Ashiraya you look lovely.

So much this. Hybrid, we need to find you some self-confidence quick, there are far too many women out there waiting to meet you, and you probably don't even realize it.

Both you and Ashiraya would definitely fall in the 8-10 (out of 10) range for attractiveness.

 Ashiraya wrote:
...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw. Maybe it's just a good photo (my friend took it, he's a professional photographer) but I feel my jaw looks too masculine IRL. It really troubles me.

I did not expect approval! Rather, I expected others to agree it looks manface. The black-and-white was by my request as I like it that way!

Also, while the picture is quite recent, I've since got a little acne which subtracts about 100 points.

You've got a bit of an Ellen Page look going there (In no way am I suggesting you're a lesbian btw)

I uhhh... Thank you, guys! I am quite overwhelmed.

I suppose its only fair I include some photos of myself then (though I feel like I've done this already), these are older pics from a year + ago, the beard has since filled in rather nicely and my hair is a bit longer now (at least up top, the sides are kept fairly short, going for the Ricki Hall look):



Here are some pics from Halloween, just because my costume was great and I think I look hawt in the one where I'm washing off the makeup lol



gakky photos, but what can you do?lol

Automatically Appended Next Post:

 angelofvengeance wrote:

 Ashiraya wrote:
...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw. Maybe it's just a good photo (my friend took it, he's a professional photographer) but I feel my jaw looks too masculine IRL. It really troubles me.

I did not expect approval! Rather, I expected others to agree it looks manface. The black-and-white was by my request as I like it that way!

Also, while the picture is quite recent, I've since got a little acne which subtracts about 100 points.

You've got a bit of an Ellen Page look going there (In no way am I suggesting you're a lesbian btw)

If Princess Diana and Ellen Page somehow went back and time together, had a daughter, and she grew up to be gorgeous, it'd be Ashiraya lol

 Ashiraya wrote:
I uhhh... Thank you, guys! I am quite overwhelmed.

Just one bit of advice about that particular photo: it's a pretty good artistic portrait, but if you're thinking about using it in a dating context it has the potential to be a very polarizing picture. Some people are going to love that style of picture (harsh contrast + serious pose/expression + close crop = attractive, but in an intimidating way), but for some people it's going to look a lot less attractive than a more "conventional" picture and might make them skip over you based on that first impression.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

chaos0xomega wrote:
gakky photos, but what can you do?lol

Find a friend with a good camera and a bit of talent with it. And this is a general rule for everyone, one of the best and easiest things you can do to improve your image in a dating context is to get some pictures with a proper camera. You don't even need anything too complicated, someone with the right hardware can give a vast improvement over your average cell phone shot with very basic portrait techniques.

Oh no no no, I am not going to use it in a dating context. I am not actively looking for a date currently, I am mostly frequenting this thread to learn for the future and read about others' endeavours. But thanks for the advice!

Also, wow chaos0xomega, you look quite good as well!

Maybe I am just used to the stubble-toting, unshowered, overweight, hairy teenagers at my school, but still!

I think I am rather blessed in the camera department. As mentioned, I have a friend who is a professional photographer, so I won't have to fiddle with my own low-quality camera.

chaos0xomega wrote:
I suppose its only fair I include some photos of myself then (though I feel like I've done this already), these are older pics from a year + ago, the beard has since filled in rather nicely and my hair is a bit longer now (at least up top, the sides are kept fairly short, going for the Ricki Hall look):

Spoiler:

Here are some pics from Halloween, just because my costume was great and I think I look hawt in the one where I'm washing off the makeup lol

Spoiler:

gakky photos, but what can you do?lol

Automatically Appended Next Post:

 angelofvengeance wrote:

 Ashiraya wrote:
...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw. Maybe it's just a good photo (my friend took it, he's a professional photographer) but I feel my jaw looks too masculine IRL. It really troubles me.

I did not expect approval! Rather, I expected others to agree it looks manface. The black-and-white was by my request as I like it that way!

Also, while the picture is quite recent, I've since got a little acne which subtracts about 100 points.

You've got a bit of an Ellen Page look going there (In no way am I suggesting you're a lesbian btw)

If Princess Diana and Ellen Page somehow went back and time together, had a daughter, and she grew up to be gorgeous, it'd be Ashiraya lol

holly crp your beard in the first pic.. I want it.

Thank you! Haha, inside every one of those stubble-toting, unshowered, overweight, hairy teenagers is a handsome well-dressed man waiting to happen. I wasn't exactly the prettiest thing to look at in high school (though I was never overweight, thankfully), but then I got to college and kinda reinvented myself, its been kind of a long process though.

I still stand by my statement, you could be a model, having a friend thats a pro photographer will certainly help if thats something you choose to explore.

shrouded - your beard will grow in time. I couldn't do anything like this until I got to be about 22/23. Don't rush it, beards take time

Best not to ask why I was dressed like this... I do own the scarf btw

you are a cowboy. /approval.

 Ashiraya wrote:
...Wow. Yes, it's the jaw.

Well, honestly, on the picture, I like it. Makes you look strong, yes, but that is not a bad thing!

 Ashiraya wrote:
Also, while the picture is quite recent, I've since got a little acne which subtracts about 100 points.

For this and other skin problems, men have beard, women have make-up. We have it better .

 Albatross wrote:
Mate, you could be a male model.

I got a pretty lucky picture with that one, because it was just taken to test if the webcam was working iirc. But one picture can be quite misleading. Have you looked at the other pictures? And you only saw those I decided to put on a dating website.

Let me give you some of the pictures I did NOT post on OkCupid:

I am planning on getting a new haircut soon. I am not quite as hairy as on that first picture, of course, but I feel it is getting a bit too long. I have been taking more care about how I look recently, for reasons you should all be able to guess.
Anyone has some neckbeard picture of himself/herself (well, whatever the female equivalent of neckbeard is!) to share?
Also, having a French accent in France is not exactly setting you apart

chaos0xomega, are you middle eastern? You look like a well-groomed, good looking middle eastern guy.

chaos0xomega wrote:
So much this. Hybrid, we need to find you some self-confidence quick, there are far too many women out there waiting to meet you, and you probably don't even realize it.

It is because they are very, very quiet about it . I certainly would not be hard to convince if one of them asked me on a date!

Hybrid, don't let your hair or beard grow out that long (unless you're going to take really really good care of it to make it look like those first two pictures you posted previously), neither should you cut your hair so short (although I will point out that you have excellent cheek bones), try to keep it looking like in those photos you posted previously, its a very good look for you and will make many a lass weak at the knees (although the via ferrata one is cool just because it makes you look like a BAMF.


And no, lol. I'm not MIddle Eastern at all haha, my heritage is Hungarian and Dominican (as in the Dominican Republic, a latin american island in the carribean nestled between Cuba and Puerto Rico, since evidently many Europeans have no idea what/where that is, unless they're from Russia).

So, I am going back a few pages and add on to what Ketarra said about how to make yourself more attractive to others. He had a good list, but there were two things I wanted to add to it.

1. You have to show/tell that you have some sort of ambition or goal for your life. If you are a male, this will differentiate you from many, many of your peers. Don;t be a fraid to share a sliver of your ambition/goals on first dates when it works.

2. It helps to be employed or to have some stream of income. Maybe its not your dream job, but just showing that you can reliably make money is a big deal. It speaks to your ability to provide stability which is a key psychological need for people.

Edit: Don't we all ready have a thread for posting pictures around here? Let's not get this one locked.

 Easy E wrote:
Edit: Don't we all ready have a thread for posting pictures around here? Let's not get this one locked.

We do, but this is not actually off topic. Showing photos of ourselves and discussing how to use them on dating sites (and indeed, which ones to use) is one example of an on-topic use of pictures, another is to show them and then give tips on possible changes.

Having been on a number of dating sites myself, I can safely say that they are (for me at least) a massive waste of time. Get out there and socialise with people.

What I've found is:

1) A lot of people don't bother to fill out their info.
2) A lot of people don't pay subscriptions to send/receive messages from their matches.
3) Are spam-bots or Nigerian fraudsters
4) Are fething crazy.

See, I met my current GF on Tinder. I think dating sites/apps are a great idea. I mean, to socialise you have to meet people, right?


Incidentally, for anyone who is curious (probably no-one) my avatar is a picture of my actual, real-life head.

Lol Tinder is just as bad as your average dating sites. I just got call girls and the amount of spambots on that app is nuts.

 angelofvengeance wrote:
Lol Tinder is just as bad as your average dating sites. I just got call girls and the amount of spambots on that app is nuts.

I feel that Tinder is only as effective as the person using it, sure.

 angelofvengeance wrote:
Having been on a number of dating sites myself, I can safely say that they are (for me at least) a massive waste of time. Get out there and socialise with people.

Yeah but for some people... that's nor really an option, for whatever reason.
For me it's just... well it's a huge faux pas to hit on women in the hobby I am in (the non model wargaming one).
I live a boring life lol
(I like my life, but it is kind of dull to many)

 Albatross wrote:
Incidentally, for anyone who is curious (probably no-one) my avatar is a picture of my actual, real-life head.

Hardly anybody is curious about it because most of us already know, and have even seen bigger pictures of you, as you did post them on this thread, or someone put a link in this thread to them in the official show your picture thread (I do not remember which anymore) .

chaos0xomega wrote:
Hybrid, don't let your hair or beard grow out that long (unless you're going to take really really good care of it to make it look like those first two pictures you posted previously), neither should you cut your hair so short (although I will point out that you have excellent cheek bones), try to keep it looking like in those photos you posted previously, its a very good look for you and will make many a lass weak at the knees (although the via ferrata one is cool just because it makes you look like a BAMF.

So, which length exactly, in the end? I am currently just a bit longer in hair and bread that on my profile picture, and I was planning to cut as short as on the one with the shortest hair.
Also, that Via was actually so goddamn easy we were literally doing it with 6/7 years old children. I cannot recommend Via Ferrata enough is there are some next to where you live. You can bring almost anyone with you, they will likely have a great time, and maybe you can even look like a badass in the process. Except if you are dating girls that are very much into sport, especially mountain sport, they may find that boring and way too easy.


Remove the plank, remove the huge metal handles, and then you get BAMF. Likely the kind of build that makes you want to live shirtless for the rest of your life . I am still working on that.

 angelofvengeance wrote:
What I've found is:

1) A lot of people don't bother to fill out their info.
2) A lot of people don't pay subscriptions to send/receive messages from their matches.
3) Are spam-bots or Nigerian fraudsters
4) Are fething crazy.

I have none of those problems on OkCupid yet. Sending and receiving message is free, the dubious account are very easy to find, and just ignore the empty profiles. Still you can meet someone crazy, I guess, but that is a risk I am willing to take.

Sometimes I wonder if Im lying about who I am when im looking for a girl.
Im a big geek that watches kids cartoons, anime, plays board games. I also dress up as my favorite characters from TV. I play video games alot. I like weird stuff....
Im not some bald frat boy drinking all the time.
I just wonder if Im just going about it wrong and looking for the wrong people

 Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:

So, which length exactly, in the end? I am currently just a bit longer in hair and bread that on my profile picture, and I was planning to cut as short as on the one with the shortest hair.

You look just like the actor James Franco to me and he often has a beard and long hair. I think the beard/hair length in the 'Profile Picture' looks pretty good on you it just needs some trimming I think to neaten/square it up.

Also, if I may, Ashiraya looks like Sam Fox, especially with the tousled hair.

Seriously, you all look like models...

 Rainbow Dash wrote:
Best not to ask why I was dressed like this... I do own the scarf btw

Spoiler:

You're Wes Anderson?

...Okay. So, my number one worry, my jaw, is apparently not a problem.

But there is something else as well, my eyebrows. They are less bushy now (I've shaved them a little bit) but they are a bit... uneven. Especially the rightmost part of my left eyebrow.

Is it noticeable? I have done my best to even them out, but they are more stubborn than a Commissar.

What is the point of dating via false projection of self?