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Whether or not British people pronounce schedule with a "shed" or a "sked".

I think if I ever saw him again, I would PUNCH HIM SO HARD IN THE FACE IT TURNS INTO A VAGINA! XD

I got into a fight once because a guy complimented my then girlfriend's ample boobs.

Actually, we were all drinking in the sitting room and the entire room complimented my girlfriend's bosom, but Harry had the misfortune to be the last one, and the only one I was listening for. I stood up, and demanded that he step outside so I could defend against this affront to her honour. It was of course, pissing rain, because it was Ireland. I stripped to the waist, and squared off against Harry. Harry is about 6 foot, and 17 stone, played a lot of rugby. He's basically massive. I'm 5' 11" and 9 stone, play a lot of warhammer. I rush at him, going straight for the nuts, and he just scoops me up over his head and chucks me into a rosebush. I bounce back up, rush back at him, and then he repeats the action. I decide that he is the better man, and spend about 5 minutes trying to convince him to "Go to her!".

I don't drink whiskey to excess anymore.

A fat woman stuck her hand in my bag of chips while i was eating in a kebab shop and said 'ooh giz a chip!' as she stole a fist full. I said 'you look like you have had enough chips' and she moved her ample girth with suprising agility and punched me in the throat. I then was on the back foot as she started throwing more punches with a gracefulness that belied her size. In the face of this onslaught i opted to aggresively mash the rest of the bag into her face and then ran the 4 miles back to camp persued by a large gang of males coming to the rescue of the obese damsel with a staggeringly accurate right hook.

Religion.

Back when I was a freshman in high school.

Spider. No not an actual spider. The word spider.

I am quite an arachnophobic, and he was doing it just to grind my grill... and we both despised each other.

During a walk up a staircase that felt like three hours, he followed me saying "spider, spider" and touching my back... So I ended up punching him in the face and walking away. Everyone stopped talking... He said "I barely felt it p y!"... until he was down at the office crying like a babe, clutching his face.

mattyrm wrote:A fat woman stuck her hand in my bag of chips while i was eating in a kebab shop and said 'ooh giz a chip!' as she stole a fist full. I said 'you look like you have had enough chips' and she moved her ample girth with suprising agility and punched me in the throat. I then was on the back foot as she started throwing more punches with a gracefulness that belied her size. In the face of this onslaught i opted to aggresively mash the rest of the bag into her face and then ran the 4 miles back to camp persued by a large gang of males coming to the rescue of the obese damsel with a staggeringly accurate right hook.

You fething legend.

Only gotten into two fights in mt life...Actually,never mind, that second one wasn't.

Uh, we were playing dodgeball in elementary school (maybe 6 years ago) and this guy on my team started throwing his ball at the back of my head. I told him to stop. After about 4 times, I threw the ball as hard as I could into his face, thn proceeded to push him on the ground and repeatedly smash my fist into his chest/face/stomach area.


I got no punishment because I'm usually a totally well-rounded person. I very rarely get angry. They just thought I was crazy

Kid rage is the most fearsome of all. Working in the creche I often wished I had access to a cup.

This is dakka dakka OT forum, most of you fethers could start a fight in an empty elevator!

And I still lost

mattyrm wrote:A fat woman stuck her hand in my bag of chips while i was eating in a kebab shop and said 'ooh giz a chip!' as she stole a fist full. I said 'you look like you have had enough chips' and she moved her ample girth with suprising agility and punched me in the throat. I then was on the back foot as she started throwing more punches with a gracefulness that belied her size. In the face of this onslaught i opted to aggresively mash the rest of the bag into her face and then ran the 4 miles back to camp persued by a large gang of males coming to the rescue of the obese damsel with a staggeringly accurate right hook.

FISH and CHIPS (Fighting In Someone's House and Causing Havoc In People's Streets)

hehe

Chibi Bodge-Battle wrote:

This is dakka dakka OT forum, most of you fethers could start a fight in an empty elevator!

And I still lost

That donkey-cave in the mirror fights dirty!

My ex-Aussie roomate and I got into once over the proper past-tense of sh!t. Is it sh!t, like hit, or shat? Just when things cooled down, another friend brought up sh!tted. That was years ago, but when it comes up in conversation, we still go at it.

This isn't really a fight a got into myself, but it was one I witnessed on a regular basis... and it was silly every time. When I was going to school my friends and I were regulars at one of the local bars... OK, several of the local bars... Anyway, this one place had a 2 am closing time instead of the 1 am time like everywhere else, so of course, everyone piled in for that last hour... usually very drunk. At about 1:45 they'd do last call & at 1:55 they'd start moving people out. Without fail, every night... a brawl would start. So, right before the bouncers started moving everyone forward, we'd step up on this little ledge by a railing near a raised section of the bar so we could see the fracas from an elevated vantage point. Because we were regulars and had never caused any trouble, we were not herded forward with the masses. It was great entertainment... the drunks were no match for the bouncers but they were very enthusiastic. We had the added responsibility of occasionally catching a combatant that got knocked spinning out of the melee and tossing him back into play.

Good times...

Walked into the gents at a night club where I meet a mate looking slighty perturbed.

The cause of his flustered state was that he asked some dude the time, and the ignorant sod just wouldn't answer. My mate got really cheesed off with this guy when he realised before it came to blows that it was his own reflection in a mirror.

Too much booze just adles the brain

Chibi Bodge-Battle wrote:Walked into the gents at a night club where I meet a mate looking slighty perturbed.

The cause of his flustered state was that he asked some dude the time, and the ignorant sod just wouldn't answer. My mate got really cheesed off with this guy when he realised before it came to blows that it was his own reflection in a mirror.

Too much booze just adles the brain

What language are you speaking. Speak American, I can't understand you.

Marshal2Crusaders wrote:

Chibi Bodge-Battle wrote:Walked into the gents at a night club where I meet a mate looking slighty perturbed.

The cause of his flustered state was that he asked some dude the time, and the ignorant sod just wouldn't answer. My mate got really cheesed off with this guy when he realised before it came to blows that it was his own reflection in a mirror.

Too much booze just adles the brain

What language are you speaking. Speak American, I can't understand you.

Right you, outside.

Chibi Bodge-Battle wrote:Walked into the gents at a night club where I meet a mate looking slighty perturbed.

The cause of his flustered state was that he asked some dude the time, and the ignorant sod just wouldn't answer. My mate got really cheesed off with this guy when he realised before it came to blows that it was his own reflection in a mirror.

Too much booze just adles the brain

That's gold. Pure gold.

Several weeks ago, I had an argument with one of the FLGS staff that got to the point where we were both blue in the face and clenching fists. This wasn't about me being my usual smartass self, as is usually the case, but was over whether Warlock Purple was actually pink. He never hesitates to bring it up whenever I'm having a good day.

Colours I care about!

Hurricanes in tea cups in the workplace can be baffling.
Yonks ago I was doing time in the Cost Office.

People would get incredibly hot under the collar about the minutae of costing. They would argue the toss as though their lives were on the line about stuff like wether
part No. XY5557 should go in column A not B etc.
When Part XT5557 was a shim. Cost of shim = £0.0007


You would look at the clock and realise there are 6 more hours of this to go. And it's Monday.

Cheese Elemental wrote:

Chibi Bodge-Battle wrote:Walked into the gents at a night club where I meet a mate looking slighty perturbed.

The cause of his flustered state was that he asked some dude the time, and the ignorant sod just wouldn't answer. My mate got really cheesed off with this guy when he realised before it came to blows that it was his own reflection in a mirror.

Too much booze just adles the brain

That's gold. Pure gold.

Several weeks ago, I had an argument with one of the FLGS staff that got to the point where we were both blue in the face and clenching fists. This wasn't about me being my usual smartass self, as is usually the case, but was over whether Warlock Purple was actually pink. He never hesitates to bring it up whenever I'm having a good day.

HA. I had an argument about whether scab red is burgundy or red. It ended up in "Wait, what color were we talking about?"

I punched a friend in the throat for chewing gum with his mouth open.
Not my proudest moment.


I also once threw an elbow in someone's eye coming up the steps to one of my classes about which types of zombies are better.

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:I punched a friend in the throat for chewing gum with his mouth open.
Not my proudest moment.


I also once threw an elbow in someone's eye coming up the steps to one of my classes about which types of zombies are better.

Throat punches are nasty. Especially when fat women get their sizeable weight behind the blow with expert martial skill.

mattyrm wrote:

Golden Eyed Scout wrote:I punched a friend in the throat for chewing gum with his mouth open.
Not my proudest moment.


I also once threw an elbow in someone's eye coming up the steps to one of my classes about which types of zombies are better.

Throat punches are nasty. Especially when fat women get their sizeable weight behind the blow with expert martial skill.

Yup. Been on both ends of a throat strike. After he got up from gagging and I stopped laughing, he returned the favor.
But I deserved it in all honesty, so I didn't try and strike back.