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So I was at my FLGS today, and I was checking out. My friend, aka The_Wicker_Man on this forum, was standing behind me. Or so I thought. I started talking to him as I turned around, and to my surprise, my friend had wondered off, and another guy was behind me. So I said "oh, sorry, you're not my friend". It just slid right out. Oops.Still kicking myself about that.

So, to make me feel better, what is one of the more embarrassing social gaffes you have ever made?

_Tim?

Going to my LGS.

Murray wrote:Going to my LGS.

Ha! That made me laugh!

_Tim?

If you want gaffes, social or otherwise, then you need to kneel at the altar of the lord of all gaffes, HRH Prince Phillip

http://www.aardvarkmap.net/getamap-examples/examples-prince-phillip-gaffes.htm

Click on the balloons for a world tour of royal japery!

I was at a buddy's house for new years a few years ago. He said something silly to me, so I fired back with 'Your momma."

He had invited his parents over and his mom was standing right behind him at the time. Doh!

"Sorry Mrs. Massare." heh. Good times.

You should have quickly said "is here", that way you could have avoided embarrassment and revelled in your genius.

I slapped a guy on the bum really hard at a bowling alley when he was bending over a pool table. It turned out not to be my friend who I hadn't seen since high school, but instead his much bulkier ex-military brother. Luckily one of the other guys there knew me and explained it before I got my face pounded in (laughing the hwole time of course). That was probably my worst.

I was at this lesbians birthday party a few months ago. She calls herself "he" so I asked "where's the birthday boy?" did not realize she was closeted and had issues with her sexuality. Parents were right there. So....... errrrr..... yeah. Awkward.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
Was very nearly involved in a bar fight on Saturday. Not exactly a gaffe but w/e.

Some years ago I was at a party given by my parents where I was talking to an old friend of theirs, a mild-mannered Christian lady. It was the time of the scandal of the ex-British Rail shares privatisation collapse.

What had happened was that the company (Network Rail ?) which took over British Rail was about to go bankrupt, and all the shareholders were up in arms because they would lose all their money, and wanted the taxpayer to bail them out, rather than accept the judgement of the market.

(Apropos of nothing, it is remarkable how keen on free markets many capitalists are when they are receiving healthy profits, and how keen they are on government intervention when there is a danger of a serious loss. See banking crisis, etc.)

Where I lived at the time, I had to take the train every day, which was very bad indeed, so like most commuters I had pretty strong views on the topic.

I exploded into a furious tirade about the miserable conditions of my daily journey, and the outrageous cost of fares, coupled with severe criticism of the rail company and all the share owners, ending with the opinion that they could all rot in hell before they got a penny of tax payers’ money.

My interlocutor said in a mild voice, “Actually I’ve got shares in Network Rail.”

Had a friend who would always act like a petulant child whenever he didn't get his way.

One night, we're all discussing where to go for dinner and he starts doing the routine again because he doesn't want to go to the same place. So we walk out and go where we want to go.

On the way, I mention that I'm sick of him doing the routine and it was about time he learned the world didn't revolve around him.

Yep. He was right behind me.

Did he sulk? Did he ever. Proved my point though.

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I was at this lesbians birthday party a few months ago. She calls herself "he" so I asked "where's the birthday boy?" did not realize she was closeted and had issues with her sexuality. Parents were right there. So....... errrrr..... yeah. Awkward.

That is hysterical.

yeah.... gay people have their own cultural norms/etiquette etc when it comes to gender issues. it was hard core embarrassing.

We were at a party and a bunch of us were talking about the Rutger Hauer movie Flesh and Blood, and my friend said he thought the rape scene was played for laughs. A girl overheard this and asked what could be funny about rape? My mate tried to explain that it was a really over the top, ridiculous scene, and she just kept repeating the question, and he kept trying to explain.

My friend didn't know, but most of us there knew the girl had been raped some years before. The whole thing probably lasted about three minutes, but it felt like hours.

I imagine..... yeesh.
oh and there's always coming back with "your mom" when someone insults you, and then finding out their mom is dead. That's a classic.

sebster wrote:We were at a party and a bunch of us were talking about the Rutger Hauer movie Flesh and Blood, and my friend said he thought the rape scene was played for laughs. A girl overheard this and asked what could be funny about rape? My mate tried to explain that it was a really over the top, ridiculous scene, and she just kept repeating the question, and he kept trying to explain.

My friend didn't know, but most of us there knew the girl had been raped some years before. The whole thing probably lasted about three minutes, but it felt like hours.

Meh.

There's lots of instances where rape can be funny. I can think of a few George Carlin bits and a particularly hilarious episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force.



I say that as someone who's family has been affected by the act. It's a terrible thing, yes. Is it taboo to joke about in a clearly not-to-be-taken-seriously sort of way? I don't think so.

Monster Rain wrote:I say that as someone who's family has been affected by the act. It's a terrible thing, yes. Is it taboo to joke about in a clearly not-to-be-taken-seriously sort of way? I don't think so.

Well, sure, note that I didn't disagree that the rape scene in the movie could have been played for laughs (the scene certainly made me give a guilty laugh or two). It's a dark subject but that's the best ground for dark humour.

Watching my friend try to explain that to a rape victim was excruciating, though.

One time I was talking to my mum about my sister anger issues and she had walked by my room (I never heard her) All of a sudden she kicks in my door, smashing it into my mother, screams in my face about how "She doesn't have a f*ucking anger problem, marches right back out and smashes every vase she walks by.

Prove my point? Yes. Does she believe it? No of course not.

I'm a dick. I laugh at dark humour a lot, laugh at things I shouldn't, don't empathise with people well, and my mouth moves before my brain.

I mean, today I was laughing at some accidental innuendo and the FLGS manager thought I was taking a dig at his wife. He was right in my face when I left the store and I was on the verge of tears because he's a 6-foot-something middle-aged muscular guy and I'm a 5'6" bespectacled teenager. I haven't been that scared in a long time.

Me and my big mouth. Fething stupid.

Monster Rain wrote:
There's lots of instances where rape can be funny. I can think of a few George Carlin bits and a particularly hilarious episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

I had completely forgotten about that glorious piece of animation.

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I imagine..... yeesh.
oh and there's always coming back with "your mom" when someone insults you, and then finding out their mom is dead. That's a classic.

Guilty. Actually, no worse. A friend and I were talking about a number of ways in which we could power a disco light for the FLGS (wierd eh?). (Jokingly) He suggested getting orphans to run around in a sort of windmill, I agreed saying "Yeah, who are they going to tell, their parent?" The girl right behind me was an orhpan.

Cheese Elemental wrote:I'm a dick. I laugh at dark humour a lot, laugh at things I shouldn't, don't empathise with people well, and my mouth moves before my brain.

No wai!

Oh, I can top all of these so far.

I used to work in a bottle shop and one time this really cute girl walked in with her boyfriend holding her hand. They were both dressed in sort of fancy dress I guess, on their way to a party, the guy wearing like a gangster suit and the girl all dressed up in a fancy red dress.

They walked past the counter, went and picked up a bottle of wine and came over to the counter to buy it when I noticed she was us holding a blind cane. She hands me a fifty straight from her wallet and looks me right in the eye and smiles. I smiled back and took the money and said something like, off to a fancy dress party?

She says, yeah, its a bad taste theme. And I go, ahh, that explains the cane then, I thought it was a bit weird that you were holding one, it seemed like a pretty slack joke to me!

There's this long pause and then she goes...no, I actually am blind...

Oooops...

But here's the kicker...

Desperate to try to save some face at this point because she was hot and my brain hadn't quite grasped that she couldn't actually see how chagrined I looked, I stumbled for something to say and the best I had was.

'Oh, you don't look blind...'

I've done worse things on purpose and things I still hate myself just a little bit for, but every time I remember this story, I die just a tiny bit on the inside!

AbaddonFidelis wrote:yeah.... gay people have their own cultural norms/etiquette etc when it comes to gender issues. it was hard core embarrassing.

You would be conflating sexual orientation with gender identity though. Being gay/straight is a separate issue to being transgender and it's not so difficult to separate the issues, there is an etiquette but it's not a mystery and they are probably used to people making mistakes.

Transgender people often feel very much feel like they were born in the wrong body, so a person with a male mind in a female body could easily consider themselves a man that fancies women, superficially you would think them a lesbian but from their point of view they are a straight man trapped in a woman's body. Whereas an actual lesbian feels like a woman who simply fancies other women. This is why some people then go on to have a sex change, which they feel gives them the body to which they feel comfortable.

I'm told that to get a sex change on the NHS you have to 'live' as a women for a couple of years, but therein lies the problem. Some people who monitor transgender people to see if they are living as a women impose all kinds of strange demands, like they shouldn't wear trousers. Now all women wear trousers, but a transgender person doing this can have a mark put against them because they are behaving in a male manner. But the round about point I'm making is that if you were to refer to a transgender person trying to jump through such hoops to prove themselves by the sex they *appear* to be rather than the one they *feel* to be, then that's probably why it could be considered a gaff of sorts.

MY best was with my brother while in a store. We were joking and doing regular stuff when he said a rather odd joke to me. I forgot what it was but I do remember it was basically about him banging my wife. It took me a minute to figure out what the hell he was talking about. So Im standing inline...in front of him, or so I thought. And it hit me, so while turning I basically shouted "oh feth you buddy" only to see some old dude standing there. That was awkward to say the least

Emperors Faithful wrote:

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I imagine..... yeesh.
oh and there's always coming back with "your mom" when someone insults you, and then finding out their mom is dead. That's a classic.

Guilty. Actually, no worse. A friend and I were talking about a number of ways in which we could power a disco light for the FLGS (wierd eh?). (Jokingly) He suggested getting orphans to run around in a sort of windmill, I agreed saying "Yeah, who are they going to tell, their parent?" The girl right behind me was an orhpan.

lol. the joke is funny. that she was actually an orphan is even funnier.


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Howard A Treesong wrote:

AbaddonFidelis wrote:yeah.... gay people have their own cultural norms/etiquette etc when it comes to gender issues. it was hard core embarrassing.

You would be conflating sexual orientation with gender identity though. Being gay/straight is a separate issue to being transgender and it's not so difficult to separate the issues, there is an etiquette but it's not a mystery and they are probably used to people making mistakes.

Transgender people often feel very much feel like they were born in the wrong body, so a person with a male mind in a female body could easily consider themselves a man that fancies women, superficially you would think them a lesbian but from their point of view they are a straight man trapped in a woman's body. Whereas an actual lesbian feels like a woman who simply fancies other women. This is why some people then go on to have a sex change, which they feel gives them the body to which they feel comfortable.

I'm told that to get a sex change on the NHS you have to 'live' as a women for a couple of years, but therein lies the problem. Some people who monitor transgender people to see if they are living as a women impose all kinds of strange demands, like they shouldn't wear trousers. Now all women wear trousers, but a transgender person doing this can have a mark put against them because they are behaving in a male manner. But the round about point I'm making is that if you were to refer to a transgender person trying to jump through such hoops to prove themselves by the sex they *appear* to be rather than the one they *feel* to be, then that's probably why it could be considered a gaff of sorts.

I just figured I was being respectful to that woman.... since she called herself "he" all the time. the real issue was that she was closeted and (I found out later) had big issues about her sexuality. She would be cool with it one day and then, for religious reasons, deeply uncool with it the next. She hadn't come to terms with it. As a gay man I understand that completely - it feths with your head and it can be really hard to adjust your self image to suit the...errr... demonstrated facts. but yeah I'm talking about the LGBT community as a whole. I can refer to my gay friends in the feminine form (bitch is a really popular piece of gay slang in the US, for whatever reason) and it will probably be ok if they're comfortable with themselves. Obviously calling a strait person "bitch" is a little riskier.

As far as transgender people I really don't believe they're trapped in the wrong body - they have a self image that they want their bodies to reflect. No doubt if they become extremely attached to that self image it can cause them psychological pain to not have the kind of body they want, but I object to the medicalization of the condition. That's just a way to get other people to pay for what is basically cosmetic surgery.
AF

AbaddonFidelis wrote:

Emperors Faithful wrote:

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I imagine..... yeesh.
oh and there's always coming back with "your mom" when someone insults you, and then finding out their mom is dead. That's a classic.

Guilty. Actually, no worse. A friend and I were talking about a number of ways in which we could power a disco light for the FLGS (wierd eh?). (Jokingly) He suggested getting orphans to run around in a sort of windmill, I agreed saying "Yeah, who are they going to tell, their parent?" The girl right behind me was an orhpan.

lol. the joke is funny. that she was actually an orphan is even funnier.

You might think so, but her parents had died in a car crash not two months before. I felt like the an absolute gak-head.

Emperors Faithful wrote:

AbaddonFidelis wrote:

Emperors Faithful wrote:

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I imagine..... yeesh.
oh and there's always coming back with "your mom" when someone insults you, and then finding out their mom is dead. That's a classic.

Guilty. Actually, no worse. A friend and I were talking about a number of ways in which we could power a disco light for the FLGS (wierd eh?). (Jokingly) He suggested getting orphans to run around in a sort of windmill, I agreed saying "Yeah, who are they going to tell, their parent?" The girl right behind me was an orhpan.

lol. the joke is funny. that she was actually an orphan is even funnier.

You might think so, but her parents had died in a car crash not two months before. I felt like the an absolute gak-head.

oh..... it was fresh.....

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I imagine..... yeesh.
oh and there's always coming back with "your mom" when someone insults you, and then finding out their mom is dead. That's a classic.

If you are like me, then you slyly reply, "I know..." The faces you get are priceless
[EDIT] can't be a 'fresh' death.

well you get less sensitive about it in time. I was in high school and some kid went off about my mom. she had just died so he ofcourse got his ass beat. I'd probably be a little cooler about it today.

Of course, I would only say it to someone I hate or am friendly with, so they either get rage pissed or don't mind, so it serves its purpose.
Also, most of my friends instantly lie and say their mom is dead if anyone starts a yo mama joke

AbaddonFidelis wrote:I just figured I was being respectful to that woman.... since she called herself "he" all the time. the real issue was that she was closeted and (I found out later) had big issues about her sexuality. She would be cool with it one day and then, for religious reasons, deeply uncool with it the next.

I think I (possibly proving the confusion easily caused) got hold of the wrong end of the stick. She's a lesbian that likes being called 'he', but not in front of her conservative parents and in doing so you put your foot in it. Got it. Hope it wasn't too awkward for them!

Enough transgender people suffer depression and commit suicide for me to now except that it is a very genuine condition, though not one I fully understand.That's the case for a lot of things, I didn't really know any gay people (well none that I knew of) before I went to university but I've met a fairly wide range of people since...we have a group of polygamous bisexuals visiting next weekend and that probably will teach me a few things. (no sniggers at the back please)


I can't think of a social gaff, but aged about 15 I forgot my lines in a school play...in front of the whole school. I died.