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It has an almost Clue-level cast of character actors. It was great to see with a decent crowd in the theater. I’m going to see it again with different friends when it comes out on streaming.

Bullet Train

It’s utterly stupid and a total comic book experience, and I loved it

Assassins on a train, mayhem ensues, Brad Pitt is charming. Do not watch if you are epileptic, or are allergic to backstory whiplash!

 BobtheInquisitor wrote:

 AegisGrimm wrote:

 Sigur wrote:
I'll also always prefer the first one, but I do think that Conan the Destroyer is perfectly OK.

Both movies were beloved by me as an 8yo kid, and just about were the first thing that put me on the path to loving medieval fantasy. Just unashamedly awesome, even if they weren't really that loyal to the Conan mythology.

They are awesome.

But medieval fantasy? Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis and the rise of the Sons of Aryas?

It might not be strictly "medieval" fantasy, but it was the best that the era had to offer to get a kid into fantasy. Magic, big swords, warrior women, bulging muscles, monsters, horse-punching.

The Fall Guy

In theaters now.

This film is a throwback in many ways, almost all positive. The stunts are real and most of the effects are practical, which makes the action genuinely exciting. The movie is action-romance-competence porn with a dash of humor and mystery, an old fashioned crowd pleaser. It also feels like it was built around the star power of its two leads, which is great if you like Emily Blunt and Ryan Gosling, but not so much if not so much.*

Basically, I think it makes a fun date night or family night movie.



*One reviewer I saw complained that there were some lines that seemed like they were supposed to be jokes, but they weren’t jokes. I’m pretty sure they were written not as punchlines but to emphasize the stars’ charms, like any scene from an older film where Hugh Grant went “uhh ahh” or Jeff Goldblum said “uhh ahh”.

The Fall Guy (2024)

It isn't a 1:1 of retelling of the tv show but goes for capturing the spirit of the show in two hours that thankfully isn't just trying to set up a sequel or series. They could have tried and set it up as a series, or use sequel bait, but thankfully it is a self contained story.

It is a light romantic comedy and mystery rolled into a package surrounded by awesome stunt work. It creates every excuse it can to create stunt heavy scenes that are fun to watch. If you like the stunt work of Fury Road you'll most likely enjoy this. It is a very meta film that comments on narrative structure and film tropes, often as they are happening, and the more you know about film work/jargon the more jokes you'll get. I imagine a slew of "all the references in The Fall Guy" type videos on YouTube.

The cast has great chemistry with each other seem to be having a good time. Gosling has the snot knocked out of him during the film.

A genuinely entertaining and funny film worth seeing. I won't go so far as to say it has to be experienced in a theater but if you do you won't be wasting your money. Plus it might help encourage more well made films. Oh who am I kidding?

Still, highly recommended.

The Retirement Plan

Nic Cage! Jackie Earle Haley! Ron Perlman! Ernie Hudson! in a sort of spy chase slightly tongue in cheek spy thriller.

It’s…alright. Nic Cage is a retired Government Operative, who was possibly an Assassin. Whilst enjoying his retirement on the Cayman Islands, he has to help his daughter and granddaughter who are in a spot of bother because reasons. And of course he puts his skills to good use.

The action is fairly restrained, which makes for an oddly refreshing change of pace. Cage’s character isn’t showy or John Wicky, just really competent. Though he does look a bit too much like Rik Mayall as we saw him in Man Down (the grate one’s final role before his most untimely psssing).

It’s nothing particularly special, but it’s passed the time on this Bank Holiday Sunday very nicely.

S.W.A.T. (2003)

Sweet Moses in a diaper, this film is 21 years old...

Reboot of a 1975 TV series, taken off the air for being too violent, this has Samuel L Jackson, Collin Farrell, Michelle Rodriguez, Jeremy Renner and LL Cool J as Cops Who Shoot People (but only bad ones). Made at the height of post-911 "all cops are heroes" zeitgeist, we get a rag-tag (yet elite!) team of cops who have to escort a drug lord to prison. The catch? He's offered $100 million to anyone who can get him out!

Will the SWAT team make it through the gauntlet as EVERY CROOK IN LA goes gunning for them? Will the crooks have RPGs and machine guns? Will Judas MacTraitorson betray them? You'll have to watch it to find out!

A bit slow in the start, the first half is training exercises! Will Team Samuel L Jackson successfully complete the simulated airplane hijacking? Yes! Yes they will! Once the gauntlet starts it's is a bit of a mixed bag, there's one over the top attack with hijacked 18 wheelers, missile launchers and such, there's a .50 cal sniper rifle taking down a helicopter and such. But then they try to return to a bit of realism as the real escape plan goes off.

Still, a great film for assembling Adeptus Arbites Exaction Teams by. It went on to spawn 2 direct to video sequels and a TV show now in it's 7th or 8th season so it can't be all bad.

The_Real_Chris wrote:

 Kid_Kyoto wrote:
Purge 4-The First Purge

I always liked the reviewer who challenged the audience to name one character in the purge films. I know who they are, I know their real names, I still can't remember their character names.

Piece of cake! I just watched two Purge films, there was uh... Not~Elizabeth Warren, That Guy from Captain America and uh, Black Dude. So there.

I watched that at the cinema back in the day. Things I remember: Michelle Rodriguez not being in it enough, weird jokes about Polish people and the enjoyment of an american hot dog. Also Jeremy Renner. Few months prior I'd seen him as Jeffrey Dahmer. In SWAT he was HUGE by comparison, which amused me. Overall I wasn't too much into the film, despite a pretty OK cast. Didn't know it was based on a tv show.

And because it’s available on Digital today?

Ghostbusters Frozen Empire

This is my second watch through, so now know what’s coming plot wise, so can just enjoy the minutiae.

Something that’s immediately grabbed my notice is the cast chemistry, because it’s pretty damned great. And so, whilst the film does have its flaws, it’s pretty easy watching. The relationships feel genuine, and they clearly had fun making this,

Ray however remains my Stand Out Character. He has excellent interactions and development throughout. Indeed my favourite scene is when Ecto-1 goes flying past his shop on a mission, and on his face is this look of wistfulness, but also pride. It helps the audience feel like Ray has lived a life since Ghostbusters 2.

Don’t get me wrong, there are things I think they could’ve done differently. In fact my friend and I did a YouTube review, and we discussed just that. And I’m gonna propose we do a follow up where we focus on those suggestions.

But get this watched, it’s very family friendly, if like the originals perhaps a bit much for the very young.

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome

The one with “Two men enter, one man leaves!”

This is the Conan The Destroyer of the Mad Max movies. It’s a sequel to a true classic that tries to capture the same magic while going bigger yet safer…and almost does. Almost.

The production design alone is worth the watch.

S.W.A.T. II: Fire Fight (2011)

This direct to video sequel of SWAT I: The Pre-Avengers has none of the original cast or characters returning.

Instead, as far as I can remember, we got the story of Sgt Stuart S Swat who is sent from LA to Old Detroit to train OCP Clearance Teams for the Delta City Project. He soon clashes with Moff Gideon as he tries to train the team in the Ways of the Swat, just as Master Windu once trained him. However he is soon entangled in a battle of wits against a T-1000 ending in a battle in an abandoned housing project. Will patrolman Alex Murphy survive? Will What'sHerName from Arrow save the day? Will there be a cool impossible shot by a sniper? And will the Detroit SWAT team (whose symbol is a skull, because nothing says Serve and Protect like a skull), will they get certified? You'll have to watch it to find out.

Or don't.

It's not good.

I'm here for two things, explosions and cool police stuff. Which means I want at least a veneer of realism. So when Sgt Swat is sent to Detroit to train the team the chief reminds him he's not a cop and has no arrest powers. To which he says I can't train them unless I lead them and yeah, then goes around shooting people with the rest of the team, kicking people off team, brining in the Hot Chick and all that. Much like how when we get a trainer at work they also control the budget, can fire folks and reassign people, because that's what a trainer gets to do right?

And of course the supervillain who can get military explosives and hack any computer and all that, well he can do it because he works for the top-secret black ops organization known only as... the State Department?

And needless to say after killing multiple people no one is taken off front line duty or sent for a psyc evaluation.

It's dumb in the bad sense.

And does not need to be. Why make Sgt Swat a trainer, why not just make him team leader from the start? Why not have the psyco villain work for an actual black ops agency? This totally fails the Fifth Grader test (if a Fifth Grader sees the problems in your script, you have a bad script).

Knowing

They dig up a time capsule at a school and find a series of numbers written by a student 50 years ago. This leads to a lot of bad things happening.

Nic Cage does his thing. Ben Mendelsohn is in it. Actually, pretty decent characters and character moments in this film.

There are a couple moments that are also very effective at being disturbing. It made me think about the film Melancholia.

Knowing is really well done until you get to the ending, which demands David Hume/Epicurean levels of fridge logic.

Back on Farscape, on season 4 now. Rather lovely.

I wish I could enjoy Farscape.

It’s a good show. And I loved it when it first on. But for reasons unknown? I just can’t rewatch it.

I can watch Andromeda though. And that show really isn’t very good. Mind you, Future Trance Gemini may be a significant part of the appeal.


Mmmmm. Future Trance. *Homer noises*

I enjoyed Farscape for ages, my only real crit is that I feel they got WAY WAY too overlong with the whole Scorpy/Chriton storyline in terms of the little thing in his brain. Way too many "he's mad being mad doing mad human things" kinda storylines come middle last half of the story.

There was a lot I enjoyed about Farscape, yet we only made it through two seasons before switching to something else. (Which is better than my wife’s and my attempt at Lexx.)

My favorite character was the pilot, the Jim Henson puppet with the Uhura sized role, so that didn’t help. My least favorite was the bald inconsistent alien. Or maybe it was the goofy inconsistent big alien. Or sometimes the theater-kid energy albino.

I think I only liked three characters consistently.

Rambo, Last Blood

A Latter Day Sequel, not to be confused with the earlier Latter Day Sequel simply called Rambo.

This is a wicked film. After the daft excesses of Rambo III, Stallone once again gets his character back to a more grassroots.

It’s a decent thriller, and the final shootout is astounding. Also more restrained, but just as fun, as the final shootout in Rambo.

I very much enjoy Farscape, but yea, the Harvey stuff in Chriton's brain might have gone on a bit long. It's OK though. I like all the puppets. Everything's better with puppets. To me the whole thing very much feels like Community, but with sci-fi. Which is about the best verdict I can give to a show.

I realized that in our Traveller campaign I verymuch play Rygel (as a captain).

Puppets not only have a lot of life to them, but like model ships, they last the test of time so well compared to CGI which often ages very poorly.

Absolutely and 100%. I think it's also much easier for the actors and that - on some level - translates on the screen.

rewatched Cameron's Avatar a few days ago. really gorgeous movie in every aspect. the scenery CGI in particular has aged incredibly well, and combined with my love of bioluminescence and sky islands means i got a lot about of that aspect... which makes it a shame that most of the three hour slog is devoted to characters with less charisma than a wooden plank and a story so generic that it feels like someone forgot to remove the template before shooting

anyway ive heard really good things about the water CGI in the second film so i'll probably be watching that one soon but this rewatch taught me that i should significantly lower my narrative expectations

There ought to be a word for films that you're really glad you watched once and have no desire to ever watch again. Avatar is the apex of this sort of film.

There probably is a word.
It's probably German.

Yeah. A film you’re glad you’ve seen, you feel your life is richer for having seen it, but have no desire whatsoever to see a second or further time.

Whilst I know there are those who adore it (my friend’s son and his grandad have a special bond through repeated trips to the cinema to see Avatar), but for me whilst a truly stunning bit of film making? The actual story is distinctly average. To the point I only slightly cheekily call it Ferngully In Spaaaaaaace.

Ferngully had better story telling!



And yeah there's a few films that I've watched that I don't want to rewatch or won't rewatch for a very very long time -Grave of the Fireflies is right in there!

The Green Knight

The one based on an Arthurian legend you really need to read ahead of time.

This is a frustrating movie. There are a lot of beautiful shots and artistically-crafted scenes, but there are also long stretches of nothing happening or the film being too dark to see what’s happening. Slow pace I can deal with, but not being able to see anything drives me nuts. Also, the deliberate pace finally changing made it really obvious when the movie

Anyway, I highly recommend reading the legend and then watching some of movie’s best scenes on YouTube. The trailer is also worth watching. I can’t recommend watching the whole movie.

Also, it surprised me that the pretentious art-house version of the story ditched 90% of the homoeroticism.

oh i love The Green Knight. i get the issues with lighting, but the pacing of the film is perfect. it's more a film about traveling than anything else and it's really good for that

The Sonic the Hedgehog Film Empire!

All two of them!

For family friendly, action-adventure fantasy movies they are all right. Sure, I could have literally written them myself because there is nothing "new" that happens in them. They are competently done and probably delivered on budget. They are a solid example of workmanlike professionalism and craft in the industry and that should not be overlooked.

I actually enjoyed seeing Jim Carrey hamming it up as a villain. It seemed like for the first time in a while, he might have been having some fun on-screen.

So, what you’re saying is, you sanction his buffoonery?

 StudentOfEtherium wrote:
oh i love The Green Knight. i get the issues with lighting, but the pacing of the film is perfect. it's more a film about traveling than anything else and it's really good for that

The traveling scenes were great. Most of them were beautiful, well-framed, and visible. The excellent fantastical parts at the beginning and ending were also well lit, or at least moodily-yet-adequately lit. The movie was gorgeous when I could see it.

There were just too many mostly-indoor scenes that were cut like they were supposed to be meditations on some personal growth or letting some gravitas sink in, but were just completely unintelligible inky masses of blurry darkness. The pacing became an issue when nothing visible was happening. I found myself googling “Green Knight Too Dark” and going down a Reddit rabbit hole of technical jargon waiting for something to look at onscreen.

I mean, I hate having to old man rant about movies being too damn dark, but the movie was too damn dark. At least I didn’t need subtitles just to hear the dialogue…

 Easy E wrote:
The Sonic the Hedgehog Film Empire!

All two of them!

For family friendly, action-adventure fantasy movies they are all right. Sure, I could have literally written them myself because there is nothing "new" that happens in them. They are competently done and probably delivered on budget. They are a solid example of workmanlike professionalism and craft in the industry and that should not be overlooked.

I actually enjoyed seeing Jim Carrey hamming it up as a villain. It seemed like for the first time in a while, he might have been having some fun on-screen.

Yeah. I watched the last third or so of that film and it seemed rather un-horrible. Sunday afternoon thing.

Btw, I also watched the Super Mario Brothers film. It's alright. The little star ghost who went insane in prison might be a bit hard to understand for kids, but I think that isn't a huge problem. It's inoffensive, there are some fun ideas. It's a kids' film and a huge ad.