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Just becuase he wasn't a social slow doesn't stop that kid from being a major jackass.

Emperors Faithful wrote:What an SoB!!!!! And you know what I mean by SoB

No, I don't. Please explain.

i mean, it would be life or death situations if they forgot to mow their lawn for a while and then went to get the paper

lolz

"Wild Pidgey appeared!" You can put that on their tombstone.

In all seriousness though, no one would really "die", they'd just black out like they do in the game and wake up later with a sore ass.

you forget they'd also be missing a good chunk of their cash.


apparenlty wild pokemon are notorious pick pockets

I sense a thread jacking in progress...
As for Pokemon hilarity: Here ya go
They also have a page on how "Red" gets his cash from opponents

On topic: I recently played a game at my FLGS. It was a league day and I was playing against one of the other members when some guy and his kid come wandering in to watch. The kid has some Chaos figures, and decides to watch the varying games asking questions here and there.

Things go awry however, when he arrives at my table and begins peppering us with questions about who was winning, if the Guard (me) were getting owned, or if the space marines were getting owned, and if we could show him how to play later, etc, etc.....

At this point I'm just trying to ignore the kid, but my opponent is answering the kid with basic answers and grunts for the most part. Finally the kid says something along the lines of "I bet my Chaos could own these space marines" and the SM player just says
"Sure they would kid, now can you get out of here?"

Emperors Faithful wrote:Grunt13; you should win a prize in jackassery.

Do you even know when to shut your mouth?
That was pretty mean, man. Mabye you meant it, mabye you didn't.

That either makes you a cruel donkey-cave, or an idiot. Take your pick.

That’s a bit judgmental of you. Do you feel completely at ease in categorizing me based off a few incidents I took part with the people who desired to freely associate with me? So what I placed myself in these situations from time to time, it’s not like I seek out people and insulted their intelligence or morality in order to elevate myself shielded behind a blanket of internet anonymity.

Every person has run their mouth off at one time or another. I chose to share my experiences in the spirt of this thread based on awkward encounters. Do you really think that I inflicted such deep, emotional pain on these people that merits such an incrimination from you? Lighten up.




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Another of my high school Antics: Kidnapped the Leader of the Goths

First off let me state that I was well socialized with the individual and this was not some cliché jock antagonization of the goth kids. We actual played necromanda together he was house delaque (big surprise) I guess that means this is also a gaming related story. It was just another of the opportunities that I could not pass up.

Outside our high school by the front entrance was a cluster of Goths who were standing around engaged in some group dynamic that was focused on an object that was passed back and forth between them. It was a set of handcuffs. The group was passing them around taking turns putting them on and using the key to take them off.

I position myself nonchalantly about 15 paces from the group willing them with all my mental forces that the desired opportunity would present itself. The goth leader took the handcuffs and held them behind his back with both hands. When I heard the telltale click signaling that the goth had just locked his hands behind his back - I bolted into action.

All attention was on the handcuffed goth. I was able to position myself right behind the group in ready to pounce position. In one fluid strike I sailed between two Goths with their backs to me and ducked down placing my shoulder in the handcuffed guy's gut. With a sweeping gesture I had him draped over my shoulders and with his hands cuffed behind his back he really had no way of resisting his abduction.

So while everyone was stun by the turn of events, I used this confusion to bolt down the sidewalk with the goth king hanging off my shoulder. It was my taunt of, “I stole your king!” that drove them into action. So the whole group takes after me. I can’t turn my head but I can gauge their distance by their sound of their shoes on the pavement and their shouts of protest. I had about a 10 strive head start, but due to the extra baggage some members of the group were closing in on me, particular my victim’s girlfriend who was leading the herd both in proximity to me and volume of her screeching.

Well I redouble my effect and increased my speed. My strives were lengthen and the pursuers began to become more distanced noises. The girlfriend kept up with me the longest but I was able to leave her gasping as well. With a 150-pound person resting on my shoulder I was able to outrun a pack of Goths – just say no to smoking kids.

The school was border by a wooded area. After running half the length of the building all I had to do is leap the guardrail and disappear into the trees with the Goth leader. But, I heard the weak noise of my burden say, ”stop please you’re killing me”. Apparently being draped over someone’s shoulder while they’re in full sprint is quite unpleasant. At the end of every strive his diaphragm was compressed against my shoulder. Being the nice guy that I am I stopped when he expressed his physical discomfort.

I put him down and had to support him by holding him up; he was bent over and winded. I looked back and all the other Goths are bent over and gasping from their fairly merger sprint. Some only made it about 15 meters before giving up, the girlfriend made it the furthest but was about 20 meters away from me when I stopped and put the guy down. Seriously kids don’t smoke. I could have easily made it to the woods without any of them even able to keep their heads up when we vanished into the foliage. I looked over the now free and still gasping goth and said something like, “You’re lucky I am such a nice guy, we were close to making the tree line and you in becoming my woodland bride”. After he caught his breath we had a laugh about it. His girlfriend never liked me after that, perhaps she saw me a competition. The incident was often referenced whenever someone rolls a capture roll when doing recovery for our necromanda games.

People who believe in fairies and won't listen to reason deserve to be mocked.

EDIT:I suppose the logical conclusion of that is that people who believe in fairies deserved to be mocked because, well, what is the argument for the existence of fairies again?

Sidstyler wrote:I'm not sure why that was such a horrifying realization in the case of the Pokemon kid. I was under the impression that they didn't really keep it a secret. Hell, in the first game (if I remember right, this was back in middle school after all) Team Rocket starts catching/stealing Slowpokes with the intent of selling their tails as they're considered a delicacy or some such, right?

[Enter Nerd Mode] Actually it was the second generation of games, pokémon Gold, Silver and Crystal, that this happens in, near the Ilex Well... [/End Nerd Mode]

Grunt13 wrote:“I stole your king!”

....
I love you.

Do you really think that I inflicted such deep, emotional pain on these people that merits such an incrimination from you? Lighten up.

If the Pokemon kid starts killing people and eating their organs I am so going to remember this.

“I stole your king!”

...dude...I'm not even sure what to say, that's just amazing. That has to be the best story posted so far.

It has allmost nothing to do with gaming though...


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Its strange, if I had seen this in real life I would have thought about what an asshat you were. But on a forum it sounds funny...

I liked the other stories better. Psychological torment is so much cleverer.

I know, but it's still some funny ass gak. I mean imagine seeing that in person, a guy running down the sidewalk with someone draped over his shoulder yelling "I stole your king!"...it's almost surreal, you'd swear you were slipped something funny at lunch time.

Sidstyler wrote:I know, but it's still some funny ass gak. I mean imagine seeing that in person, a guy running down the sidewalk with someone draped over his shoulder yelling "I stole your king!"...it's almost surreal, you'd swear you were slipped something funny at lunch time.

If you want to total picture imagine someone wearing blue jeans and a tee shirt carrying a fully knit out goth with his equally adorned retinue in chase, some even screaming in dated jargon –example “Unhanded him fiend”. The best part for me was managing to out run a group of Goths their trenchcoats blowing in the win, heavy necklaces smacking them in their faces, with the frilly shirts creating drag, the whole bit.

I know I blamed their smoking, but their attire was not doing them any favors either. A lot of the Goths played necromanda (all house delaque) so the monarch theft affected the gaming circles, mostly in puns and other jokes, house delaque later teamed up on my scavvies during multiple gang battles citing vengeance. Such shenanigans where somewhat common in my social circles and it was completely laughed off by the king goth.

Excellent story Grunt. I wish I lived near people that:
1) played Necromunda and 40k
2) Had such fun shenanigans as yourself without harming one another, or doing it in a serious fashion to damage ones mentality.

Congrats sir, you have given me quite the laugh

lol!!!
That was the best story ever Grunt13.

Okay, Grunt13, I apologise for having a go at you earlier. It just seemed like you had REALLY hurt a fragile persons feelings. (you have to be fragile if you believe in fairies, right?)
Anyway, I realise now that your toungue just got away from you. I overreacted. Sorry.

Grunt13 wrote:

Second:

I looked over to her and make a comment about how I enjoyed the book she was reading. She lights up on the fact that another person from the school could even be remotely interested in fairies let alone the big jock sitting next to her. The book was a very serious portrayal of fairies their anatomy culture, how they conceal themselves from humans the whole bit – fairies were real, the book said so.

So we get into a riveting discussion about fairies, their culture, perspective, basically everything. I am enjoying myself and she is near ecstatic to be involved in a fairy discussion. Right about now some small dark part of my psyche said, “She vulnerable strike now!!” So despite the fact I was having a pleasant and intellectually stimulating conversation, I started the following dialogue:

Me: Yeah fairies are cool; too bad they don’t exist.
Her: (shocked look on her face, like someone slapped her) They do to exist!
Me: If that is true how come my all fairy traps keep turning up empty.
Her: (Half laughing half crying, clearly worked up) They’re just too smart to get capture in your traps!
Me: Ah come off it, they can’t be that much smarter than squirrels.
Her: (Speechless)........

Well she was… I guessed worked up would be the best way to describe her state of mind. A voice behind me from someone who was listening in just said, “Awesome”. She went back to reading her book and I went back to finishing my homework. If it makes people feel better we later became friends after that and we often had many more interesting conversations.

I just can’t seem to help myself when presented with these opportunities. It's instinctual or something- I have made enemies due to this personality fault of mine.

While entertaining, you probably were 24-48 hours of faking interest in Faeries from getting laid.

Shame on you sir. You passed on 100% free range, untested, teen sexual enthusiasm.

Is it me, does it feel more "Dirty Old Man" in here all of a sudden?

well it is more BECUASE of you than just you...heh, heh. (smartass joke)

I heard that's how fairies get their wings.

Fly faires! Fly! Before 'Dirty Old Man' can catch you!!!!

Long winded sorry:

So I had a very akward, but unfortunately expected moment this weekend. We had our second 40k tourney at our local store. Good idea since we've never had the interest or numbers to draw a crowd, but the tournament organizer would not listen to reason I spent the prior week and a half trying to get him to fix the scenarios. For info on what happened at the last tournament http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/36/232100.page

So one of the scenarios that he used this time was horribly written. It was essentially a Planetstrike scenario, but in a tournament setting. What I mean is that you roll to see who would be the attacker and defender. The defender has all of the advantages and the attacker is shoe-horned into capturing objectives and moving them during his turn into a "corral" that is literally the size of a large blast template. Sounds good except for the defender could place the 5 objectives anywhere he wanted at least 12" apart then deploy his army anywhere outside of the attackers deployment zone. So since I play IG I just parked my army on top of the objectives which were placed on my table edge. Just from looking at the scenario we know the defender has it made unless he gets tabled by turn two.

My opponent has Dark Eldar. He traveled over two hours to play because he knew one of the guys helping with the tourney. He doesn't even get one objective in the corral. We were only able to get 3 full turns in before time was called (1-1/2 hour time frame). I can tell he is pissed. I don't blame him and I apologize for the scenario. Out of the 6 tables that played that round I believe all 6 defenders won. The scenario was so badly written that the games essentially were won or lost on a dice roll to see who gets to pick. It was so awkward because the guy had no chance of winning unless he completely tabled me (which was reasonable since he had a ton of Wyches) and I knew, going in, that this would likely happen. He tells the TO that the scenario is bull and that he should have fixed it.

After the game one of the TO's helpers told us that in their playtesting the defender won nearly everytime. After the tourney the TO says that the Attacker won most of the time. Since the empirical evidence supported the idea that the defender wins I know that the TO is full of crap. While I ask the TO a question during one of the games he starts dropping 4th ed rules. It's pretty sad when I have to be the one to correct a TO (since I'm just getting back into the game).

The TO tells me about his next idea for a scenario. Get this it's a winner. Before deployment select your opponents HQ choice and you get to control him (and vice versa). Your goal is to kill your own HQ choice. WTF? I said what about Tyranids and Synapse creatures? His response, "well you better bring another synapse creature". What a fantastic idea!

I once caught someone masturbating to a daemonette model.

True story. Never again will I venture into the FLGS toilets.

Ok, awkward gaming moment just occured, really cheese im not interested in your masterbating habits.

WUT?

Ok , this is the second time in 24 hours you have creeped me out. You are a twisted bastard, and I DO NOT share your sense of humour.

That said, akward moment=yes.

Cheese Elemental wrote:I once caught someone masturbating to a daemonette model.

True story. Never again will I venture into the FLGS toilets.

Thats messed up.

Sure they may be half naked women.......things. But they have claws and are purple (typically) and a variety of other anomalies.

Just plain weird

Scaring people is what I do for a living now.

I was not the one fapping, BTW. Of course not, why would you suspect me... ahem. Moving on.

Strange, very strange, im suprised nobody has put walking in on you as an awkward gaming moment.

I'm Christian. I'm not allowed to masturbate.

Then again, I'm not very pious

Ah, so that means you can defecate without guilt. Good to know!

Lt Scourge wrote:Strange, very strange, im suprised nobody has put walking in on you as an awkward gaming moment.

LT you're pushing the "IWANNABESUSPENDED" button. Hard. You might consider ceasing this line of posts.

Frazzled wrote:

Lt Scourge wrote:Strange, very strange, im suprised nobody has put walking in on you as an awkward gaming moment.

LT you're pushing the "IWANNABESUSPENDED" button. Hard. You might consider ceasing this line of posts.

Frazzled has been Perturbed. How many times do we need to remind you to NOT PERTURB THE ANGRY SLOTH WITH A FRIGHTENINGLY LARGE DILDO!

This has been a Public Service Announcement. Just what public I am serving is a matter for debate however.