40k Vending Machine I: Just As Planned

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**BigWaaagh**

You get a Chinese finger puzzle.

I insert a $2. bill.

**snurl**

You get an odd look from people born after '76.

I insert a hose clamp.

**BigWaaagh**

You get a prostitute with the Kung-Fu grip!

I insert Tonya Harding.

**snurl**

You get a vacuum.

I insert the Minnesota Vikings.

**gruebot**

You get a matching set of yellow and purple bath towels.

I insert a bar of soap from Paper Street Soap Company...

**ChargerIIC**

Pity. You get Pity, packaged with care

I insert a collection of razor edged fidget spinners

**BigWaaagh**

You get circumcised.

I insert the Marquis de Sade.

**snurl**

You get a whippersnapper.

I insert Fantascenes figures.

**ChargerIIC**

You get Reaper figures

I insert a Mountain

**gruebot**

You get dew.

I insert Fanta...

**snurl**

You get a Bantha.

I insert Blackwater Gulch.

**BigWaaagh**

You get a visit from the Miner 49er...Ruh Roh!

I insert a worm from the bottom of a bottle of Mezcal.

**snurl**

You get visions of a tequila sunrise.

I insert a wooden nickel.

**gruebot**

You get a woodchip.

I insert kerosene...

**snurl**

You get burned.

I insert Whelm.

**ChargerIIC**

You get Sub-Whelm

I insert a bucket of facebook likes

**snurl**

You get a thumb up your [REDACTED].

I insert the crazy cat lady.

**gruebot**

You get the Old Witch & Scrapjack.

I insert The Man in the Machine...

**snurl**

You get the Machine Spirit.

I insert Nita Strauss.

**BigWaaagh**

You get Levi Strauss.

I insert a bottle of Glenfiddich Fire & Cane Experimental Series scotch and a glass.

**snurl**

You get a twelve year old.

I insert a case of empty bottles.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a DUI and are arrested.

I insert the upcoming Orks codex.

**snurl**

You get a month of hate mail.

I insert greenstuff.

**gruebot**

You get a Nerds Rope.

I insert a deviation dice...

**ChargerIIC**

You get a bowl of S&Ms...

I insert a parking lot

**BigWaaagh**

You get towed.

I insert a Komodo Dragon.

**ZergSmasher**

You get a dragon kimono.

I insert a bag of Cheetos.

**BigWaaagh**

You get a pet Cheetah named Chester who has impeccably good taste!

I insert Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.

**snurl**

You get running jews.

I insert ripperjacks.

**ChargerIIC**

You get Bone Jacks

I insert a 500 page manual on the proper use of MS-DOS 6.