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I will say that Insurgent (the sequel to Divergent) legitimately made me fall asleep in the theatre before I was poked awake by the friend I was going with, something I've never ever done before. Even if I tried my hardest, I couldn't tell you who anyone was or what they were doing; I guess that could be more insulting to a director than a movie that was so terrible it sticks in your memory.
That one lost me right at the start, when the heroine was talking about how everything depended on them killing the leader of the dystopian government. Man, if only she'd been helpless and right in front of you while you were holding a loaded gun at some point in the previous movie.
One of mine is Immortals. This movie is an obvious 300 knock-off with a host of really bizarre storytelling choices. Like how the Greek gods have a prohibition against showing themselves to mortals or interfering in their affairs, so that belief in them must be based on faith. You know, like in absolutely no Greek myth ever--half of them were about people who would have been better off if the gods would have stopped turning up and screwing with them. But there's just something weirdly compelling about what a glorious mess it is, and a big chunk of that is the guy who plays the evil King Hyperion. How can you root for the hero when the villain is just making so much more effort?
"The 75mm gun is firing. The 37mm gun is firing, but is traversed round the wrong way. The Browning is jammed. I am saying "Driver, advance." and the driver, who can't hear me, is reversing. And as I look over the top of the turret and see twelve enemy tanks fifty yards away, someone hands me a cheese sandwich."
That reminds me of Keanu Reeves' 47 Ronin. There were so many people who did such a good job, but it was still a terrible movie. Rinko Kikuchi's evil sorceress was the most fun character in the whole movie.
Soldier with Kurt Russell. Much was made about how the set design or some damn thing was by the same guy as did Blade Runner. It has Sean Pertwee in it. Still absolutely terrible.
Last Man Standing with Bruce Willis. The entire movie is orange.
Complicity with Ewan McGregor based on the Ian Banks book. It wasn't until 3/4 of the way through the movie that I realised that the intro saxophone music STILL HADN'T STOPPED.
Graphite wrote: Soldier with Kurt Russell. Much was made about how the set design or some damn thing was by the same guy as did Blade Runner. It has Sean Pertwee in it. Still absolutely terrible.
Last Man Standing with Bruce Willis. The entire movie is orange..
I love both those movies. I've seen Soldier like 100 times. The other films I've watched over a hundred times include but are not limited to...
Big Bird Come Home.
Dumb and Dumber.
The Goonies.
Batman Returns.
Hot Fuzz.
Jaws 4 the revenge.... the shark follows the family from NY to the Bahamas to get revenge for killing his buddies in earlier movies... best part is the shark roars like a lion then explodes when speared by the sailboat
This is one of the all time terribad movies I've ever seen. When I first heard about it, I saw that it was directed by Winrich Kolbe (a bunch of episodes from the first three Star Trek series) and had Wes Studi (The Sphinx from Mystery Men and Kaetenay from the Penny Dreadful series) in it so I was intrigued. I was like, "How bad could it be?"
OMG it was bad. It's projectile vomiting bad. I'm talking Taco Bell diarrhea bad. It's so bad Ewe Boll was like, "Damn, son. Learn to direct."
So, because misery loves company, here is all 90 glorious (cough) minutes on YouTube.
A Ewe is a female sheep. Boll's work is closer to horse-puckey than sheep, though.
Wes Studi also played Eytukan in Avatar (the mocap performance and voice is his). He's been in a lot over the last couple of decades. I'd have loved to see him play "Mr Snow" in the proposed "Amtrak wars" movie they were wanting to make in the 90s. Before Carolco went tits-up.
I'm OVER 50 (and so far over everyone's BS, too).
Old enough to know better, young enough to not give a ****.
That is not dead which can eternal lie ...
... and yet, with strange aeons, even death may die.
Breotan wrote: This is one of the all time terribad movies I've ever seen. When I first heard about it, I saw that it was directed by Winrich Kolbe (a bunch of episodes from the first three Star Trek series) and had Wes Studi (The Sphinx from Mystery Men and Kaetenay from the Penny Dreadful series) in it so I was intrigued. I was like, "How bad could it be?"
OMG it was bad. It's projectile vomiting bad. I'm talking Taco Bell diarrhea bad. It's so bad Ewe Boll was like, "Damn, son. Learn to direct."
So, because misery loves company, here is all 90 glorious (cough) minutes on YouTube.
Oh my god I needed that. Thank you for sharing it with us! It's so 90's it sets off all my nostalgia, the effects still fit into my personal idea of awesome, and seeing Magua in a space uniform made me smile. The film's editing and direction are so incoherent as to be a strength in an avant-garde, French novel kind of a way. I'm going to have to finish watching this later, when I have time, because it is brilliant(ly terrible).
Takes me back to time at uni and picking up these kinds of films on VHS, amazing how many of them would show up in second hand and charity shops and the like.
For some reason can really enjoy watching these still, although stuff that tries to satirise it (Kung fu fury etc) just isn't the same. It might be the difference between deliberately making something that's gak, and trying to make something that's good and it just turning out appallingly?
You didn't like kung Fury? Man I watched that every day for weeks when it came out.
Music video sample of its glory for anyone who is not aware of it.
Spoiler:
It holds a special place in my heart as the second most ridiculous use of Hitler I've ever seen- it could not rob Danger 5 of that distinction.
Klawz-Ramming is a subset of citrus fruit?
Gwar- "And everyone wants a bigger Spleen!"
Mercurial wrote:
I admire your aplomb and instate you as Baron of the Seas and Lord Marshall of Privateers.
Orkeosaurus wrote:Star Trek also said we'd have X-Wings by now. We all see how that prediction turned out.
Orkeosaurus, on homophobia, the nature of homosexuality, and the greatness of George Takei.
English doesn't borrow from other languages. It follows them down dark alleyways and mugs them for loose grammar.
Asherian Command wrote: You know em, you love to hate them! Movies, movies are subjective, and then there are bad movies, the worst of the worst. I have a list you probably have seen or heard of a few. So lets begin...
DAKKA DAKKA! What is your most beloved but most loathed movie you have ever watched? Or what is one movie that is so bad you love it? (Like Krull).
Asherian Command wrote: You know em, you love to hate them! Movies, movies are subjective, and then there are bad movies, the worst of the worst. I have a list you probably have seen or heard of a few. So lets begin...
DAKKA DAKKA! What is your most beloved but most loathed movie you have ever watched? Or what is one movie that is so bad you love it? (Like Krull).
-Plan 9 From Outer Space
-Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
-Damnation Alley
OoooooO Attack of the killer tomatoes, now that is some sh** sauce on film! The props are bad, acting is bad the idea is bad its just bad! But so bad youll laugh your ass off enjoying it
Manos the hands of fate: Made by a halfwit with a handicam which could record no dialogue and only three minutes of footage. Languished in obscurity until broadcast on MST3K
Space mutiny: Low budget, nonsensical South African star wars ripoff. Features a confused plot, resurrected crew member [who appears to have shoved an armadillo down her pants] and pimped out golf carts that struggle to do three feet per hour
Deathstalker 3: THE WORST of the Deathstalker series. Filmed with one fraction of the others budget. Sets and props are all clearly made of cardboard [the hero nearly walks into the camera at one point]
Plan 9 from outer space: Made by a man who used to dress in drag to direct [I'm not judging his clothing style here]. Probably the WORST FILM EVER MADE. ALMOST features Bela Legosi, bad sets, corny dialogue, confused plot points, and quite possibly the worst cockpit set ever to appear on film.
Legend of the boggy creek monster: A film in which most of the footage seen is of the non-entity leads, driving to various forests
Fugitive alien II: I honestly have no idea what this film is about??? Forklift songs maybe????
Masters of the universe: A film based on an 80's toy property that is more concerned with unnecessary teen drama subplots than anything else [sound familiar?]
Hi all, new poster here. I usually enjoy so-bad-they're-good type movies, the Sharknado films as fairly recent examples. One I can remember as being pretty cheesy but haven't been able to find in a while was the Buck Rogers in the 25th Century movie from the late 70s or early 80s.
But for a genuinely terrible film, definitely in the "just bad" category, check out Birdemic. I honestly couldn't make it all the way through it. It is admittedly very low budget, but that still isn't enough to excuse
everything that's wrong with it.
Cinemasins covers it pretty well, and it'll save you having to watch the whole thing.
And there's a sequel too...
I just haven't plucked up the courage to even attempt that one.
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2016/12/15 13:51:02
Laserblast: Trashy late 70's star wars cash in with plot holes so big, you could fit Canada in them. Mostly about a shirtless wonder, fat sheriffs and unconnected plot threads
Cave dwellers: One of the many 'me too' barbarian movies from the 80's. Reedited in a clumsy way. Miles O'Keefe thanked MST3K for mocking it
Starfighters: Early cold war propaganda film made from training footage, featuring one of the crappiest jets ever made. If you love aerial refuelling scenes [of which there are many], you will love this
Hobgoblins: Unbearable Gremlins ripoff. The monsters are clearly puppets. Also features the stupidest duel in cinematic history with garden tools
The undead : Nonsensical horror film about....something? A mad grave digger, flying cats and the hammiest devil to ever grace the screen
Now this movie I thought was pretty bad until I watched it recently and felt like : This is way more relevant to today than any other time.
It turned into a time period piece and one of the few 80s movies that didn't feel dated with its message!
Also :
WARNING SWEAR WORDS
Also :
"Erwin: We're police officers! We're not trained to handle this kind of violence! "
Watch it on a UK (or basically non-US, I think) streaming service or DVD or VHS etc. and Taco Bell becomes Pizza Hut EDIT: And I just noticed the swearing fine compilation video is from one of those versions (skip to 1:40)!
Has the Star Wars Holiday Special been mentioned yet? It is truly a classic which offers greater insight into the star wars universe and everyone loves Life Day! Plus it is the first appearance of Boba Fett!
Sadly that copy doesn't have the adverts from what I can see.
I highly recommend watching the Rifftrax commentary version, with a lot of alcohol, for your own health and wellbeing.
Now this movie I thought was pretty bad until I watched it recently and felt like : This is way more relevant to today than any other time.
It turned into a time period piece and one of the few 80s movies that didn't feel dated with its message!
Also :
WARNING SWEAR WORDS
Also :
"Erwin: We're police officers! We're not trained to handle this kind of violence! "
Watch it on a UK streaming service and Taco Bell becomes Pizza Hut
How does THAT work?
Also, when I worked at a Taco Bell that movie came up in conversation almost weekly, as you might expect.
My armies (re-counted and updated on 11/7/24, including modeled wargear options):
Dark Angels: ~16000 Astra Militarum: ~1200 | Imperial Knights: ~2300 | Leagues of Votann: ~1300 | Tyranids: ~3400 | Stormcast Eternals: ~5000 | Kruleboyz: ~3500 | Lumineth Realm-Lords: ~700
Check out my P&M Blogs: ZergSmasher's P&M Blog | Imperial Knights blog | Board Games blog | Total models painted in 2024: 40 | Total models painted in 2025: 25 | Current main painting project: Tomb Kings
Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote: You need your bumps felt. With a patented, Grotsnik Corp Bump Feelerer 9,000.
The Grotsnik Corp Bump Feelerer 9,000. It only looks like several bricks crudely gaffer taped to a cricket bat.
Grotsnik Corp. Sorry, No Refunds.
Watch it on a UK streaming service and Taco Bell becomes Pizza Hut
How does THAT work?
Also, when I worked at a Taco Bell that movie came up in conversation almost weekly, as you might expect.
With overdubbing the dialogue every time someone says "Taco Bell" or mentions mexican food in that context and digitally altering all the Taco Bell logos into Pizza Hut ones.
Because having a restaurant chain which isn't really a thing outside the US would apparently be too complicated for foreign audiences I first saw it on TV here in the UK and it was the US version with Taco Bell. So I was pretty confused when I find it on Netflix or wherever it was later and am showing my friends at uni and suddenly it's Pizza Hut!
This message was edited 4 times. Last update was at 2016/12/19 01:58:59
The Laws of Thermodynamics:
1) You cannot win. 2) You cannot break even. 3) You cannot stop playing the game.
Colonel Flagg wrote:You think you're real smart. But you're not smart; you're dumb. Very dumb. But you've met your match in me.
The holiday special was quite possibly the worst thing I've ever seen [even worse than 'Manos']
Funny though the way George Lucas regards it. He wound up using the childish, unfunny humour style it featured prominently in the prequels
I've been a Warcraft fan since 2007, and I've become very familiar with the game's lore. The Warcraft movie essentially rewrote the entire story of the Warcraft: Orcs and Humans, presumably to cater to the Warcraft developers' bizarre fetish for Orcs and Humans fighting. Atrocities the Orcs committed during the time period were written out of existence entirely, new events were included, one character's species was incorrect, the outcome of the war was entirely different, battles occurred that were never a part of the story, devices and magic functioned entirely differently than they were supposed to, and ultimately if anyone only watched the movie and wanted to know more about the story, I'd have to tell them to forget everything in the movie and start over from square one.
Normally that's fine, movies can't simply take the existing story and copy it. However, when faced with the question of why they would make such a poor representation of the game's lore, Duncan Jones and Chris Metzen (the latter being Blizzard's main lore guy for literally over a decade) explained that the movie's events were 100% canonical, but merely took place in an alternative timeline. They also referenced superhero movies as an example. I have several serious issues with this explanation.
First, the movie would be more of a parallel universe than an alternate timeline, and this isn't the first time Blizzard has had trouble knowing the difference.
Second, it essentially means that Metzen and Jones were allowed to make their personal Warcraft fanfiction into canon without damaging anything that already existed.
Third, unlike superhero universes, the Warcraft franchise has never tolerated multiple versions of canonical stories simultaneously, instead opting to retcon every discrepancy into continuity.
Fourth, if a movie adaptation were made of a decades-old, well-known, specific superhero story, that got almost everything wrong, were explained away as being "100% canon, but in an alternate timeline, so it's fine" that would never be a permissible explanation.
In essence, I saw it once in theaters just so I would know what actually happened in it, then when I got it on DVD, I brought it home, put it in the player, then turned it off when I realized I didn't want to watch Orcs slaughter innocent people for 2 hours and get called the protagonists.
With overdubbing the dialogue every time someone says "Taco Bell" or mentions mexican food in that context and digitally altering all the Taco Bell logos into Pizza Hut ones.
When it hit cinemas here, Taco Bell was a "new thing" ... around 3 months before DM opened, TB started opening stores in capital cities (at least Sydney, they did. Melbourne already had "Taco Bills" for years and it was a far better place and believe they had trouble getting traction). So we got the "taco bell" references.
Several years later (it took 4+ years to hit dvd release in r4), Taco bell has gone bye-bye, unable to keep up in the franchise wars. ALL TB spoken references are overdubbed in the audio and most of the logos are replaced with "Pizza Hut" (some background ones remained unchanged). Because just like in our reality, TB didn't win the franchise wars.
I'm OVER 50 (and so far over everyone's BS, too).
Old enough to know better, young enough to not give a ****.
That is not dead which can eternal lie ...
... and yet, with strange aeons, even death may die.
Wanted - I had high hopes for this, especially with A.Jolie as a Assassin. - I was not prepared for how truly dire it was - plot, characters, style - it lacked all these. Dismal.
Inception - Dull, inconsistent series of barely adequate action sequences thrown together without a coherent or consistent plot or indeed any actual characters. Only made worse by the constant "oh you don't understand it" thrown at anyone who dared criticise this tedious mess of a film.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2016/12/19 12:02:55
I AM A MARINE PLAYER
"Unimaginably ancient xenos artefact somewhere on the planet, hive fleet poised above our heads, hidden 'stealer broods making an early start....and now a bloody Chaos cult crawling out of the woodwork just in case we were bored. Welcome to my world, Ciaphas."
Inquisitor Amberley Vail, Ordo Xenos
"I will admit that some Primachs like Russ or Horus could have a chance against an unarmed 12 year old novice but, a full Battle Sister??!! One to one? In close combat? Perhaps three Primarchs fighting together... but just one Primarch?" da001
Flesh Eaters 4,500 points
EDIT: And I just noticed the swearing fine compilation video is from one of those versions (skip to 1:40)! 
~16000 Astra Militarum: 
~1200 | Imperial Knights: 
~2300 | Leagues of Votann: 
~1300 | Tyranids: 
~5000 | Kruleboyz: 
~3500 | Lumineth Realm-Lords: 
~700
