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[Wakes up] [Stretches] [Looks at battle] ..Too much effort. [Rolls over and reads a book]

Let me know if you need a can-opener, Verviedi.

Zgort, there's one last bolter in the tank... I can't requisition any more due to being cut off after irresponsible spending, but it's yours if you like.

'tis but a scratch, Pert.

*pulls scythe out*

You, on the other hand, SYL, you are going to have Space AIDS for about three moths, then die in horrible agony.

 Buttery Commissar wrote:
[Wakes up] [Stretches] [Looks at battle] ..Too much effort. [Rolls over and reads a book]

Let me know if you need a can-opener, Verviedi.

Zgort, there's one last bolter in the tank... I can't requisition any more due to being cut off after irresponsible spending, but it's yours if you like.

You like books I got books

*Pulls out a strange demonic looking book*

Its called the necronomicon! Read it! READ IT! READ IT! READ IT!

[Sticks out hand] ...Fine. Just stop shouting.

*takes the book and has a peek*

You /really/ don't want to read this, BC.

*pockets it*

Back to the battle, however.

Oh! I remember that book! Back when I was "human", I read it when I was on fabrication shift, and then the supervisor asked what I was reading, so I ate the entire thing to avoid being shot.

*Book flaps out of pocket and makes strange screeching sounds similar to a bat and lands in one of my many tentacles*

Not for you Morty it was for the human...

*Throws morty a bar of soap from under robes*

This is your gift... get clean friend

 Verviedi wrote:
Oh! I remember that book! Back when I was "human", I read it when I was on fabrication shift, and then the supervisor asked what I was reading, so I ate the entire thing to avoid being shot.

you should be dead or at least a daemon or something

Clean? Mortarion? Hah! You think he's dirty? Go watch that bastard Fulgrim!

*Random patch of the wall turns into clockwork*

Oh, good to know that's coming back.

You really think I wasn't changed? I think I definitely came back wrong!

*Knight vanishes abruptly and I walk out from behind zombiekilla*

 thenoobbomb wrote:
Clean? Mortarion? Hah! You think he's dirty? Go watch that bastard Fulgrim!

Heh.

Your move, Pert. Three Raiders down to a silver guy. Relic's running off and gunning stray infantry units.

In hindsight, I should have put away all the Imperial Guard forces that were laying around.

*Laughs madly*

Really, I always wondered what made me go up the ranks so quickly, why reality... changed around me. I thought it was some xenotech I picked up along my travels. I suppose not!

*Face returns to normal*

Refuge in audacity, I suppose.

Isn't he the guy that did stuff with your heart?

*artillery starts bombing the silver clad warrior*

Yeah... Turns out he quadpwned the entire warp, and then fell to a single gaze upon Slaanesh.

Fool.

Anyway, he died shortly thereafter, and the Gods has a minor scuffle over who gets his soul. Slaanesh got it, but Nurgle got the mind and body on the condition that Tzeentch could do whatever it wanted with Draigo's timeline, and Khorne could get in on all the kills.

With Draigo safely in the realm of Nurgle, I can resurrect his ass whenever I need.

*Draigo catches an artillery shell and throws it back at the emplacements*

OOC: That's now become official headcannon for me. I'm getting a Draigo model now.

 zombiekila707 wrote:

 Verviedi wrote:
Oh! I remember that book! Back when I was "human", I read it when I was on fabrication shift, and then the supervisor asked what I was reading, so I ate the entire thing to avoid being shot.

you should be dead or at least a daemon or something

Wait... then why were you going to let me read it?

And that is why I took the book.

See, now I don't know who to believe out of a tentacled lunatic and.. well, you.

[Looks at Verviedi] I'm starting to think you're maybe not a good influence...

Hey. I'm a pretty normal guy. Just a little Deathly. I haven't changed at all in the last 10,000 or so years, so I've got a good track record.

 Buttery Commissar wrote:

 zombiekila707 wrote:

 Verviedi wrote:
Oh! I remember that book! Back when I was "human", I read it when I was on fabrication shift, and then the supervisor asked what I was reading, so I ate the entire thing to avoid being shot.

you should be dead or at least a daemon or something

Wait... then why were you going to let me read it?

Well... cause you... Umm... so you can travel back in time and save the world from the Army of darkness! It would have been cool you'd have to cut off your hand and replace it with a chainsaw! And the your hand would try and kill you!

Main thing is Klaatu Barada Nikto... dont feth that up ok...

How so?

Keep the book to yourselves, I've got a farm to run.

*Goes back to making sure the Knarlocs aren't eating each other*

*orders Draigo to run after Badrukk*

ANYBODY GET THE FETHING REFERENCE!

Verviedi wrote:How so?

[Holds up hands] [Stares at ceiling]...Nothing.

[Sighs] [Takes book from Zombiekilla] I said stop shouting. We all got the reference.

[Lies back down] [Lights smoke] [Uses smoke to torch the book, drops it into waste paper basket]

Toasty.

I try my best to be a good influence! ^^_^^


*Ashes settle into a rather disturbing shape*

*Burrows up under KaptinBadrukk and grabs him*

"Don't worry Kaptin, Orks don't taste too good to Zerg. Besides, this'll frustrate the hell out of everyone else if I start helping you!"

*Shoots needle spines at nearby Land Raider, busting its headlights*

"That was just for fun. Now I need a live target!"

Target? I can assure you I'm not a target, and most definitely not a good target!

*Spines flying towards me dematerialize*

...I really need to fix this minor reality warping issue. I can see it being annoying in the future.

*Looks at shasolenzabi*

I have a challenge for you...

My Knarlocs are too big to make a fun target, maybe find some gretchin?

Does anyone here have the ability to isolate and destroy warp energy? I really need to get that copy of the Necronomicon I ate out of my systems.