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*Begins disassembling the wall guns, ignoring the electric shocks*

Well, we're going to be here for a while.

*Steps out the door of the "cabin" to inspect the Faceless*

Ooh, a quad.

*hops onto quad and starts doing donuts*

I don't know what these objectives are, but this sure is fun

*falls asleep, with Orks still infesting the tank, and trying to break open his armour*

Guys, can you attack Objective Dracula? I kind of need it.

*wakes up*

It's called Objective Dingleberry.

*gets dragged away into a nearby room, and the door shuts*

*drilling and sawing noises can be heard*

No, it's not!

[Looks out of window at faceless people] Ngeh. At a guess those might be the memories of people killed in or around this tank? I wouldn't go too near. I don't know how long this tank existed before I took it on, they could be very old. And very angry.

[Turns back into room] Hm. There's no way that could get anyone into trouble... [Loud thumping noise] I was wrong. I was very wrong.

[Sound of fire extinguisher being used] ...Thanks dear.

*begins singng*

Too da dooloo

*Orks rampaging throughout the tank*

*one of them bursts into BC's room, and starts punching him*

..? ...!!

[Offers the Ork a beer]

[Whilst the ork is confused, eviscerates it, and uses its intestines to tie the door open] [Rams remaining spare organs back into its own mouth to tidy up, and kicks it in the face for good measure] [Orks realises it's dead]

[Leans out of window] Got the door open!

... ... [Picks the beer back up]

*stops doing donuts to look at BC*

I could've just opened the door for you. But, you know, whatever works.

*drives quad to room and picks up the ork's remains*

Let me help you tidy the place up.

*winced at tire tracks leading through the tank*

... sorry.

*the sound of a jackhammer being used on him*

*Faceless look at me and begin whispering*

That's... Lingua Technis... And High Gothic, and Low Gothic, and... Eldar?

*Touches one of the Faceless and is rewarded with a vision of somebody screaming while being sedated in a Servitorization lab*

NOPE. That's odd... The memories... They have no faces in them either...

*Touches another Faceless, and the vision is of a Guardsman getting runover by a tank*

*Drags fingers against five*

*A vision of a Farseer being lobotomized, a Guardsman being eaten by a Kroot, and three visions of Guardsmen being railgunned*

Oh gak....

*Sprints inside, runs back into the tank, and slams the door*

Well, looks like it's certainly a manifestation of guilt. So glad that Ork showed up...

[Smiles faintly and drinks beer] Sometimes it's just more fun to find a solution yourself.

[Watches Verviedi race out of room] ..? [Wanders over and listens to the faceless] ...Seems that it's specific to the person interacting with them. I mostly hear.. Well I don't hear language per se. [Touches one carefully] ...

... ... [Steps out, down corridor, trailed by Daemonette chewing a bar of soap]

....What did you see?

Well. Not everybody who receives the Emperor's Mercy-

[Daemonette burps a soap bubble] ...? Give me that. [Takes soap bar and throws it into a random door] [Receives a small bunch of flowers in exchange] ...?
[Hands them to the Daemonette, who starts eating those instead] ...You're incorrigible.

-deserves to. There's always doubt. Always.

[Carries on down corridor, ignoring the standard doors] Hm.

Huh. That's a shame. I didn't know you actually....

...Mercied people.

*Walks after BC*

*Protoss Zealots, Stalkers, Immortals, and Colossi start shooting and slashing the Orks, led by yours truly*

"Save that Terran Dreadnought from that Ork with the jackhammer! And make sure enough of you stay behind to protect the base!"

*Carnage ensues, as Selym finds himself surrounded by dead Orks, but undamaged. Several Zealots enter BC's tank looking for more Orks to kill...*

"You can all thank me later!"

*rides quad off to follow the Protoss into battle*

I'm curious how so much of this went unnoticed. Sure, a lot of them can be ignored, but you probably could fit a space hulk in all of these rooms.

*stray ork bullet hits a tire and causes the quad to crash into a room, revealing it to be full of TNB's, all yelling "hacker" and opening fire on anything that moves*

Holy gak!

*jumps off of quad as it bursts into flames*

Aww. Will I get another vehicle if I capture one of these objectives, whatever that means.

*Shouts down the hall*

Well, when half the rooms are full of eldritch horrors, faceless memories of the dead, and fething lava pits, you stick to what you know, I suppose.

*wanders out of random door*

There's a demon in there that gives extremely difficult puzzles, riddles, and problems. It's quite fun, a great metal challenge.
Apparently it's a betting game too. I keep winning these things.

*holds up bag filled with silvery-wight chips*

I think he called them "souls" or something along those line, some sort of currency no doubt

He's rather a sore loser though...

I suppose that makes sense.

*slams door shut to avoid being shot to bits by TNBs*

I wonder what else I can find in here.

*selects a door at random and waltzes in*

Hey, who killed all the Orks? They were using Strength 4 attacks on my Av 12. It was quite relaxing.

 2BlackJack1 wrote:
*rides quad off to follow the Protoss into battle*

I'm curious how so much of this went unnoticed. Sure, a lot of them can be ignored, but you probably could fit a space hulk in all of these rooms.

*stray ork bullet hits a tire and causes the quad to crash into a room, revealing it to be full of TNB's, all yelling "hacker" and opening fire on anything that moves*

Holy gak!

*jumps off of quad as it bursts into flames*

Aww. Will I get another vehicle if I capture one of these objectives, whatever that means.

Yes. Capture Dracula.

*waddles off to Objective Duckling*

I shall capture it for the Emperor!

*objective gets captured*
Vehicle drop inbound!
*quad falls out of the sky hanging from a parachute*

I shall burn it to a cinder!

*Heavy Flamers the Quad*

 Verviedi wrote:
I didn't know you actually....

You didn't get much choice in the commissariat. Refuse to administer justice, and you'll receive it instead...

[Finds a black door with a large swipe card lock] Finally! I figured there had to be a maintenance room in here somewhere, hopefully with a map.

[Swipes key card and pushes door open]...? That's a very large Daemon. [Walks inside] I don't see any circuit boxes. [Looks up at Keeper of Secrets] Don't suppose that you have a map for this complex?

What would I give in exchange? Uhm. Well, I've got this half drunk beer... [Daemonette walks in] Oh! And I could introduce you to my lady friend here, she's- [Listens] -your sister?

She's his sister. [Starts to back away] [Door slams]

I have suffered worse fates...

But I'm not going to even attempt this.

*Frantically attempts to break down door*

*runs over to Objective Abracadabra*

We must hold ground before the enemy closes in!