corrupt a wish!

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**Happyjew**

Granted, however you only have nightmares.

I wish for a hoverboard and flying car, as predicted by Back to the Future (Part 2).

**KaptinBadrukk**

Granted. They crash because the design was faulty.

I wish for my computer to arrive quickly.

**jmurph**

Granted. It arrives quickly and in tiny fragments thanks to poor packing.

I wish for a treasure chest full of gold and jewels.

**snurl**

Granted. You have a treasure chest full of gold and jewels. It is located in the center of your brain. To remove it would most likely be fatal.

I wish for some more recognition for my efforts.

**ZergSmasher**

Granted. You are recognized for your efforts, but not in a good way (people recognized Hitler for his "efforts", after all).

I wish I could lose weight faster.

**KaptinBadrukk**

Granted. You lose weight at an impressive rate. You lose so much you weigh only 30 pounds after 10 days.

I wish my uncle would mail the computer.

**snurl**

Granted. he sends it Pony Express.

I wish for more rainy weekends.

**KaptinBadrukk**

Granted. It rains so much, your basement floods.

I wish for missing assignments to be graded.

**jmurph**

Granted. They are graded harshly and given 0s.

I wish to be able to fly.

**DevoutGuardsman**

ooh! Ooh! Can I join in?

*ahem* Wish granted. However, as soon as you reach a height that would result in a fatal drop, you lose your ability to fly.

I wish I was able to grant my own wishes.

**TheCloverLord**

Granted, but you have to corrupt them.

I wish this wish would be corrupted, and I wish for a fish slap.

**NoPoet**

Granted; they slap you across the mouth with the fish after someone finally manages to pull the fish out of your bottom, were you were "keeping it warm".

I wish the GW would suddenly put their prices down.

**TheCloverLord**

Granted. They put them down so suddenly they have to rise them even higher after they go broke.

I wish GW didn't change their prices, but changed the quality of their models to match.

**NoPoet**

Granted. The models are hand-carved from exquisite jade by maidens who personally come round for naughty-naughty every time they hand-deliver to you. You catch the clap within days and give off a faint, ammonia whiff from your gentleman's region.

I wish nobody had to go to work and could spend all day having fun.

**snurl**

Granted. Everybody stays away from work and has fun, except you. You have to do everyone else's work now.

I wish for the neighbors to rake their leaves.

**LethalShade**

Granted, all the leaves are now in your yard.

I wish it's weekend already.

**jmurph**

Granted, it is the weekend, but it is the last weekend ever and shortened to 30 seconds.

I wish for kool aid.

**LethalShade**

*Searches on google what the hell kool aid is*

Well, you have it but you can't drink it. Ever. You can only watch it slowly evaporate, leaving sugar at the bottom of the glass.

I wish for the next Subnautica update.

**TheManWithNoPlan**

Granted, the game becomes impossible to enjoy.

I wish people would at least send me a message to let me know they're busy.

**NoPoet**

Granted. Your girlfriend accidentally calls you while she's shagging your best friend. Your mates text you and say they're out with their real friends. Your family say they'd come and visit you, but they really need to watch Brand New US Drama Series #126333847.

I wish my date would go well tonight.

**snurl**

Granted. She bursts through the wall shouting "Oh Yeah!"
Unfortunately shes sugar free blue.

I wish the band would let me know when they are going to take a break.

**ZergSmasher**

Granted. They let you know by simply walking off stage without your permission.

I wish for people to stop griping about the new Tau stuff.

**ChaoticMind**

Granted they gripe about your inane chatter instead.

I wish to own Russia and a duck.

**snurl**

Granted. You own russia and a duck. Soon you and the duck are made into russian dinners.

I wish for less drama at the show.

**LethalShade**

Granted. Everything is now directed by Michael Bay and filled with explosions without room for anything else.

I wish for inspiration to flesh out the fluff of my chapter.

**NoPoet**

Granted. You watch Sailor Moon and My Little Pony, becoming a die-hard Bronie who thinks he's cool because he talks about MLP on web forums. Your chapter is called the Moon Ponies.

I wish women on dating sites weren't all fethed up.

**snurl**

Granted. They all just admit up front that they want to find the baby a daddy and they are interested mostly in your income and medical benefiets.

I wish my phone would quit ringing.

**LethalShade**

Granted, Tyranids swallowed it because of story purposes.

I wish I could draw well.

**TheManWithNoPlan**

Granted, you draw so well you become world famous. You then realise that the pursuit of drawing is pointless and it ultimately causes you to become depressed.

I wish the haze would go away.

**ZergSmasher**

Granted. The sky isn't hazy anymore, it is overcast all the time.

I wish to paint all my 40k miniatures quickly and neatly.