Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Granted. It is huge, but there is no room at the table for you.

I wish to be able to predict the future.

Granted, you predicted that you will die next year, now you suffer from depression and hysteria.

I wish I was better sculptor.

Granted. You are much better at sculpting but you never get a minute to yourself as the world beats a path to your door and inundates you with quick turnaround projects that just have to be done right now!

I wish to finish everything.

Granted. After finishing all your unpainted models in record time, you put a bullet through your head. Your death causes the universe to collapse in on itself.

I wish for an average day.

Granted. You are involved in an average automobile accident and receive average injuries. You are then bitten by an average dog and chased by an average gang of chavs. Later you find yourself in an average jail cell with an average hangover.

I wish to remain anonymous.

Granted, your identity is now hidden. You are jailed and interrogated, because Name: *hidden* on your ID card is not valid for the police...

I wish for my flowers to stop dying.

Granted. They never die, but instead grow extremely fast and make new flowers every 3 seconds.

I wish for the next season of Attack on Titan to come out.

Granted it shall be relaxed only for every copy to be destroyed un a freak ship sinking and server meltdown.

I wish to be able to aperate like in harry potter.

Granted, you can do magic stuff and later you are also eaten by the Dementors. Not mentioning an assasination attempt by Death Eaters.

I wish I could do math better.

Granted. You now see everything as maths. It slowly drives you to insanity.

I wish for more opponents.

Granted. Everything is now 1000000 versus 1.

I wish for pens that don't run out of ink so quickly.

Granted. You have been given a pencil.

I wish for a repellent of dumb people.

Granted. You are repelled.

I wish I didn't stay up for so long.

Granted. You sleep for twenty years. When you awake, you feel a nap coming on.

I wish for some Ant repellent.

Granted. Ant repellent works, but it's highly toxic and you have to wear a HazMat suit in 3000m radius.

I wish for endless capacity cell battery.

Granted. You can't find a charger for it anywhere and it's dead when you get it.

I wish getting old was not such a drag.

Granted. Instead of being a drag, the older you get, faster time passes.

I wish global warming was reduced to a safer level.

Granted. The warming deniers claim victory and the whole process is speeded up tenfold.

I wish for a backable candidate.

Granted. The backable candidate is voted, but then you find out he was just a populist, like everyone else.

I wish for a non-crowded bus.

Granted. It is empty, with no driver either.

I wish for a new guitar.

Granted. It's a gift from your dad. He however has no clue what a guitar looks like and gets you a banjo.

I wish I understood how KR Multicase dimensions worked.

Granted. The dimensions become clear after you are locked inside one for a few weeks.

I wish for more lunch options at 3:30am.

Granted. You work in McDonald's...

I wish for (actually) full bag of Lay's.

Granted. You have a full bag of Lays but they are grumpy and by the time you let them out your chances of ever calling them "Lays" again are pretty slim.

I wish to visit Transylvania.

Granted. You arrive and are instantly placed on a spike by Vlad the Impaler

I wish class didn't start tomorrow for me

Granted. Your school has burnt to ashes.

I wish for a pretty lady.

Granted. But she's a .

I wish for a good CSM codex.

Granted. In a stroke of genius, Matt Ward splits CSM into two seperate Codex, the mean, nasty, evil CSM, and the happy, nice, good-guys CSM. He sends you a copy of the latter for giving him such a profietable idea.

I wish horses were easier to paint.

Granted. Your tiny horses miraculously came to life. They are already colored, but you have to feed them, clean after them and when you play your game, they run around the table. But you don't need to paint them.

I wish for more patience when painting another bunch of guardsmen.

Granted! You have all the patience in the world when painting guardsmen, your painting improved drastically with this inner peace, you feel whole. But, you lose your patience with absolutely everything else, you have about a three second wait period before you get violent.

I wish I'd stop gluing my fingertips together.