Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you: No adverts like this in the forums anymore. Times and dates in your local timezone. Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance. Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely. Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net. If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

Granted you can now turn lead into gold. Fool's gold.

I wish for a new computer. My hard drive died the other day.

Granted. You get a brand new up to date god machine. You drop it down the stairs into a bucket of water. It won't boot.

I wish for more electrical outlets.

Granted, there are now more electrical outlet stores where you can pay to charge your cellphone.

I wish my eyes didn't hurt.

Your eyes no longer hurt... because you don't have them anymore!

I wish I was a space marine!

Granted. You are a marine in space. You can no longer breath oxygen and the pressure in the vacuum of space is so low that the boiling point of the fluids in your body decreases below the body’s normal temperature (37C), which results in the formation of gas bubbles in your fluids and you’ll swell up pretty bad, perhaps even up to twice your normal size, but you won’t explode as your skin is very stretchy. Your blood will also not boil. You will, of course, be in an immense amount of pain and your blood circulation will be impeded. You will die in space and no one can hear you scream!

I wish that guy wasn't a space marine.

Granted.
He is now a space paratrooper in the same situation.

I wish the world was more steampunk.

Granted. I love Steampunk so your wish is my corruption. It now has more zombies and Seattle is a giant walled off city full of blight gas.

I wish people understood that Steampunk doesn't mean Robots in 1879.

Granted. The entire concept of Steampunk has changed. It is now Robots in 1880.


I wish it was October, 2015.

Granted. It will be in about 8 months.

I wish to skip the month of March.

Granted, but it will take a few months.

I wish I had more yoghurt :(

Granted, may the Schwartz be with you.

I wish happyjew was my psychotic neighbor and not the flashlight dog pooper lady who had 4 dumpsters haul her hoard of trash and crap away and cause all the neighbors to realize until it's cleaned up the value of our houses has plummeted significantly.

Ugh... The matzo section causes the bread aisle to be moved to the far side of the damned grocery store every spring. I hate Matzo for the fact I cannot get my black bread and my ice cream conveniently at the same time!

Granted, but... what?

I wish I had a golden ticket.

Granted. You find a Golden ticket. But the contest it was for ended years ago.

I wish the snowstorm would miss us today.

Granted. It misses you today, but then comes back tomorrow with a vengeance. Dropping 3 feet of snow with a high of -20 (before wind chill). You were still expected to go into work.

I wish I understood women.

Granted, but now the minds of men are puzzles to you.
And you're also a woman.

I wish I was taller.

You know Matthew...I think I could live with that.

By the way, if you don't mind, I'd like to corrupt Jamesgang's wish, as it never really happened.

 JamesGang wrote:
I wish happyjew was my psychotic neighbor and not the flashlight dog pooper lady who had 4 dumpsters haul her hoard of trash and crap away and cause all the neighbors to realize until it's cleaned up the value of our houses has plummeted significantly.

Granted. Your job relocates you to Buffalo where you have to deal with below 0 temperatures, blind intersections from the snow plows, icy roads, and you are still expected to show up to work on time.

But... What's your wish?

Sorry. I wish it would stop snowing.

Granted. It stops. Then the freezing rain starts.

I wish to get a lot painted tonight, since I'm stuck here in the snowstorm.

Granted, you get a ton painted, it's the floor as the cold weather freezes your hands and you knock over your entire paint shelf.

I wish my wishes were corrupted on time by that Swedish guy!

@happyjew - I could live with that!

Granted, however its not that Swedish guy, but this Swedish guy


I wish it wasn't freezing cold out so I could go prime

Granted, you now can now go secondary..

I wish carrots tasted like moms chocolate chip cookies!

Things are freakin awesome!

Granted, but the cookies have raisins, not chocolate chips.

I wish I could corrupt James' wishes on time.

Granted. However, James only posts when you are unable to post, so somebody else corrupts the wishes first.

I wish for spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam spam and spam!

Granted, its made from your familiy

I wish for more The Savage Sword Of Conan

Granted but it's now owned by GW and it's terrible Black Library. You get stories that do not have a concise conclusion, are written by 17 different authors and never leave you satisfied as a reader.

I wish I had better painting skills.

Granted. You are kidnapped by GW and forced to paint covers for Black Library novels.

I wish for more good opponents.

Granted. You never win a toy soldier game again.

I wish tight pants weren't a thing.

Granted. Not only are tight pants not a thing, but neither are loose pants, perfect fit pants, nor underpants. Fortunately there are kilts.

I wish it was warmer so I could wear my kilt.

Lmao!

Granted but the wind always blows.......leaving you in compromising situations in front of the elder stateswoman league for preventing tom foolery.

I wish I was brazen enough to wear a kilt like my Buffalo Buddy!