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Made in us
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Hyperspace

You mean the treatment that I developed a surgery solely to reverse?

I had to unfeth his brain twice to prevent him from going insane and shooting people from repression alone. I'm honesly surprised that the Commissariat developed a more unethical treatment than me.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 03:49:21




Peregrine - If you like the army buy it, and don't worry about what one random person on the internet thinks.
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

 Verviedi wrote:
You mean the treatment that I developed a surgery solely to reverse?
You reversed the, uh, fun repression of a commissar? [Eye twitch]

I had to unfeth his brain twice to prevent him from going insane and shooting people from repression alone. I'm honesly surprised that the Commissariat developed a more unethical treatment than me.
[Rubs back of neck] Now see, this is awkward. That's really what I'm supposed to be doing at the moment, and why I was sent as a replacement... I just haven't really sensed a polite interval in the conversation.

[Looks at bolt pistol] ...I think I may need more than eight shells.


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Wise Ethereal with Bodyguard




Catskills in NYS

It also helps that we did complete regeneration of his body several times. Heck, the last one it was just a memory transferal.

Homosexuality is the #1 cause of gay marriage.
 kronk wrote:
Every pizza is a personal sized pizza if you try hard enough and believe in yourself.
 sebster wrote:
Yes, indeed. What a terrible piece of cultural imperialism it is for me to say that a country shouldn't murder its own citizens
 BaronIveagh wrote:
Basically they went from a carrot and stick to a smaller carrot and flanged mace.
 
   
Made in us
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Hyperspace

Of course! I can reverse yours too, if you ask nicely!

Eight bolt pistol shots? I think you may dent my chassis.

Also, you do realize that you're basically on a timer, correct? I am severely weakened right now, but as soon as that virus is cleared from the Noosphere here, I will be restored to full power, meaning every single computer in this room will be fighting against you, and I will be able to read your mind and speak inside your head due to the augmetics in your brain. If they are sufficient in extent, I will turn you into just another puppet. And that's just me.

I don't even want to think about what the dragon would do with you.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 04:08:30




Peregrine - If you like the army buy it, and don't worry about what one random person on the internet thinks.
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

[Holds out hands and shrugs] I never said it was an efficient plan. It’s simply the will of the Imperium, or in this case, local warmaster.
You can’t scare me. You are all ultimately going to end up dead or enslaved, regardless of whether I personally succeed or not. I won’t be acting alone, there's an artillery platoon headed this way. They’re just… Less than punctual. [Looks uncomfortable]

And I don’t have chem-gelding, some of us get by on discipline alone… We generally just administer it to the upstarts, and those in danger of being entrapped by romantic complications. Evidently for good reason, if your previous commissar both failed to fulfil his duty, and ended up enthralled to a daemonette. Makes me regret wasting the resources to have him relocated at this point.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 06:22:11



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Wise Ethereal with Bodyguard




Catskills in NYS

H-hey, leave him alone for now. He hasn't hurt anyone.

Yet.


This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 04:41:46


Homosexuality is the #1 cause of gay marriage.
 kronk wrote:
Every pizza is a personal sized pizza if you try hard enough and believe in yourself.
 sebster wrote:
Yes, indeed. What a terrible piece of cultural imperialism it is for me to say that a country shouldn't murder its own citizens
 BaronIveagh wrote:
Basically they went from a carrot and stick to a smaller carrot and flanged mace.
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

True enough. Hot potato!

[Tosses an activated Melta bomb to Co'tor and sprints behind sofa]

[Sits up behind it with elbows propped over the top to watch what happens]

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 05:00:44



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Wise Ethereal with Bodyguard




Catskills in NYS

*random sniper drone shoots it out of the air causing it to explode prematurely, the less concentrated blast impacting off the power field*

See, now you can kill him. Or not, as he didn't actually hit me.

*pats sniper drone*

Good shot.

<happy beeping>

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 05:17:55


Homosexuality is the #1 cause of gay marriage.
 kronk wrote:
Every pizza is a personal sized pizza if you try hard enough and believe in yourself.
 sebster wrote:
Yes, indeed. What a terrible piece of cultural imperialism it is for me to say that a country shouldn't murder its own citizens
 BaronIveagh wrote:
Basically they went from a carrot and stick to a smaller carrot and flanged mace.
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

[Leans on sofa] Hey, I knew it probably wouldn't work, I just needed enough time to upload my report. [Holds up pad]

Plus, those things have a handle, you're supposed to catch and throw to the next player. [Considers] I admit that Hot Potato was not the best thing to yell at a Tau, considering you quite likely don't have potatoes... or games that involved throwing incendiary grenades.

[Stands up and approaches Butter Tank] [Tank hatches slam shut] [Sighs] ...Sofa it is, then. [Lays down on sofa and pulls greatcoat over as a blanket]

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 05:19:30



[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

 KaptinBadrukk wrote:
*Parks CRASSUS ARMOURED ASSAULT TRANSPORT next to butter tank*
*The Cube begins dismantling the CRASSUS ARMOURED ASSAULT TRANSPORT*
   
Made in nl
Wight Lord with the Sword of Kings






North of your position

*places C4 on CRASSUS ARMOURED ASSAULT TRANSPORT*

   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

 thenoobbomb wrote:
*places C4 on CRASSUS ARMOURED ASSAULT TRANSPORT*
*The Cube disassembles the C4, and consumes the components*

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 09:13:25


 
   
Made in us
Ancient Ultramarine Venerable Dreadnought






Illinois

What the hell are you doing to my CRASSUS ARMOURED ASSAULT TRANSPORT?!

INSANE army lists still available!!!! Now being written in 8th edition format! I have Index Imperium 1, Index Imperium 2, Index Xenos 2, Codex Orks Codex Tyranids, Codex Blood Angels and Codex Space Marines!
PM me for an INSANE (100K+ points) if you desire.
 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

[Sits up and yawns] Morning, heretics.
[Watches cube] [Gently ushers Butter Tank along away from it] ... [Places an inactive meltabomb on top of the cube and wanders away]

[Listens to local vox channel] Ah, excellent! [Grins]
[First squad of convicts start filing into the room and set up a perimeter] I... Was unaware that we were using prisoners. [Troubled face] You guys do a good job here, and I'll do my best to see your sentences erased, how's that sound?
[Small cheer goes up]


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

 KaptinBadrukk wrote:
What the hell are you doing to my CRASSUS ARMOURED ASSAULT TRANSPORT?!

I'm doing SCIENCE!
It's very technical, your biological mind couldn't handle it.


 Buttery Commissar wrote:

[Watches cube] [Gently ushers Butter Tank along away from it] ... [Places an inactive meltabomb on top of the cube and wanders away]

*the inactive meltabomb is keeping the top facing of The Cube down, locking the tendril inside*

Oh come on!
I really should have seen that coming.
   
Made in us
Master Shaper




Gargant Hunting

*walks up behind one convict and drags him around a corner*

*comes back covered in blood*

Ahh, breakfast was quite good.

*eyes other convicts*

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

... So your saying that your progression towards machine singularity can be impeded by a small heavy weighted object?
Is anything in this room logical? [Lifts bomb and places it beside the cube] It was supposed to be helpful. Here.

[Second squad arrives and takes up position] Fantastic! Catachans? Oh this is going to be fun... [Salutes sergeant]


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in us
Master Shaper




Gargant Hunting

*casually checks ammo supplies*

I'm not sure I like the looks of this. But then again, Catachans have a very unique DNA...

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

 Buttery Commissar wrote:
... So your saying that your progression towards machine singularity can be impeded by a small heavy weighted object?
Is anything in this room logical? [Lifts bomb and places it beside the cube] It was supposed to be helpful. Here.

Bloody small heavy objects. I need to develop a repulsion field.
Ta very much!


*dismantles and consumes the bomb*
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

Hey now, I'm not unreasonable. And I'm hiring.
Reasonable pay and all the casualties are gratis, assuming you leave the dog tags intact. Administratum do get rather particular about corpses being labelled.
In fact some days I rather feel the label is more important to them.


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

*takes a full-body scan of the commissar*
   
Made in us
Master Shaper




Gargant Hunting

You know, I haven't seen a paycheck of war supplies for doing the job I was sent to do here-

*facepalms*

I forgot to do it. That Inquisitor's ship has probably been blown out of the sky by this point, and I feel like it'd be ungrateful of me to finish the job, considering all that's happened.

Anyway, how much do you pay for fighting? I could use a rocket launcher, or some grenades... or a flamethrower. Definitely a flamethrower.

Irishpeacockz-Blackjack needs a pay raise for being the welcomer to the crusade
Palleus-Write a school essay about Kroot! Pride. Prejudice. And Cannibalsim. 
   
Made in gb
Brigadier General





The new Sick Man of Europe

*Walks in*

I represent the Rent is too damn high party.

DC:90+S+G++MB++I--Pww211+D++A++/fWD390R++T(F)DM+
 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

*The Cube uses its tendril to drag itself over to the now-disused Pack-A-Punch machine, and starts consuming it*
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

OOC: Welcome back, SYL!

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2015/09/20 13:47:12


 
   
Made in gb
Brigadier General





The new Sick Man of Europe

People are working 8 hours and day 40 hours a week, some with a third job. Women can't afford to take care of their children, feed them breakfast lunch and dinner. Why?

DC:90+S+G++MB++I--Pww211+D++A++/fWD390R++T(F)DM+
 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

 sing your life wrote:
People are working 8 hours and day 40 hours a week, some with a third job. Women can't afford to take care of their children, feed them breakfast lunch and dinner. Why?
Because rich bastards like that one Imperial Governor from somewhere somewhen decided to be asshats, and take all the money!
The hyperbole in this room is too damn high!
   
Made in gb
Decrepit Dakkanaut





Nottinghamshire

[Scan shows one bionic arm from the shoulder, augmented hearing with integrated signal system, single replacement lung and an allergy to tomfoolery]

[Looks at cube] What are you doing now?

[To Blackjack] We'll match the competitive rate for you and any of your fellow mercenaries, and the full regimental armoury is at your disposal. Payment is half up front, half on successful capture of the area.
We do ask that you keep from collecting on casualties in full view of the front line itself, it's somewhat demoralising for the soldiers.


[ Mordian 183rd ] - an ongoing Imperial Guard story with crayon drawings!
[ "I can't believe it's not Dakka!" ] - a buttery painting and crafting blog
 
   
Made in gb
Brigadier General





The new Sick Man of Europe

No, it's because the rent is too damn high! My main job is provide a roof over your head, food on the table and money in your pocket. This is politics as usual, playing the silly game, but its not gonna happen!

DC:90+S+G++MB++I--Pww211+D++A++/fWD390R++T(F)DM+
 
   
Made in gb
The Last Chancer Who Survived




United Kingdom

 Buttery Commissar wrote:
[Looks at cube] What are you doing now?
Finishing off my space program.
This Pack-A-Punch machine is an exceedingly useful manufacturing facility.
Soon, I will launch nanocubes to dozens of uninhabited worlds.
It's going to be amazing!
   
 
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