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Yeah well warhammer helps for friends but not for a relationship unless you're gay or a girl. I haven't seen many girls play GW games (they usually love to paint models strangely enough) though there was one fairly attractive nerdy girl that used to run a GW store. I never knew her that well. She got married some years ago and I've never seen her since.

The idea of going for a girl in certain nerdy hobbies seems hard though. Chances are if she's decent and single then every guy there has their sights on her. I may as well go for a nice girl which is a nerd in a hobby with more women in it. At least I wouldn't have to compete with like 100 other guys for her affections to the point where she's overwhelmed.

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If I had the money I'd probably go to a gaming convention. That might be a good way to meet some people who are as socially awkward as me ;P.

If I had the money, I'd probably consider going to a gaming convention, weigh up the pros and cons of going and not going; different travel options, routes, contingencies etc.; times of everything; what's going to happen if it all goes Pete Tong; what if my phone gets stolen; what if I miss my stop; what if I lose my card; what if I don't have enough money for what I planned; what if I'm put on the spot; what if there's a situation I can't escape from... and then make up some weak-arse excuse to myself not to go, and spend all day at home on the computer complaining about being bored.

At least I won't have a panic attack whilst making #ForeverAlone posts on twitter.

 Easy E wrote:

 Storm Shadow wrote:
there should be a follow up thread titled "How to Get Away From Your Wife", for us married folk.

Why do you think I play wargames?

1. Work in another city during the week.
2. Take up different hobbies. But make sure they don't like your hobbies first. I took up serious shooting and the wife liked it so much she took my favorite pistol. When I found a new pistol, not to be outdown my daughter appropriated it AND my then favorite rifle.

 Devoted-to-the-machine wrote:
You are going to statistically meet your mate in one of two places, work or school.

*Looks around office*

Well, I'm fethed.

Does this girl like me, and if so, what would be a good way to ask her out?

Yes. I don't actually know for sure, it would be easy to say that the 'symptoms' that you describe are indicative of something, but its just as easy to say that you're thinking too much about it and trying to intellectualize something that can't be intellectualized. Just do it.

 flamingkillamajig wrote:
Yeah well warhammer helps for friends but not for a relationship unless you're gay or a girl. I haven't seen many girls play GW games (they usually love to paint models strangely enough) though there was one fairly attractive nerdy girl that used to run a GW store. I never knew her that well. She got married some years ago and I've never seen her since.

The idea of going for a girl in certain nerdy hobbies seems hard though. Chances are if she's decent and single then every guy there has their sights on her. I may as well go for a nice girl which is a nerd in a hobby with more women in it. At least I wouldn't have to compete with like 100 other guys for her affections to the point where she's overwhelmed.

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If I had the money I'd probably go to a gaming convention. That might be a good way to meet some people who are as socially awkward as me ;P.

I love to paint! I have tried to get into the actual game part of warhammer but I find it difficult. I guess I don't get the chance to play that much as well which makes it harder to learn. Since I was introduced to the hobby though I haven't really made any friends, although it has made me a lot more social. Here at the FLGS in town all of the regulars are rather young as well so that makes it hard to befriend them in a way just because of the age difference. Since they are so young relationships are also off of the table lol. I have a feeling the place I go to is an exception and at most other places the age of the regulars is much higher.

 Devoted-to-the-machine wrote:
You are going to statistically meet your mate in one of two places, work or school. I personally meet my soon to be second wife in college.

So, I'm about to be Captain Obvious, but it follows-on from yoru point. If you want to have a relationship, you have to go out and do things that people you want to date do.

You can't spend all your social time going to the game store or playing video games at home and expect to meet your special someone. You have to bbe a bit more proactive about it.

I'm wrestling with this at the moment as well. I moved 'down south' for work, in a massively male dominated profession. It's a bit trickier as a lot of the people I know are in very 'settled down' state too. - So it's not like I've ever seen the whole, 'lets all go out and meet some girls' situation... ever actually existing in reality.

Uni seems to have been the best opportunity for me. - Pity I ended up 'wasting' a lot of it studying for a degree I didn't end up using in my final job. - Admittedly, at least it was a 'proper' degree.

So yeah, this whole romance thing is tricky business.

A swing and a miss. Feels bad man. Not that bad though.

Out tomorrow so we'll see how that goes.

So, I kind of somehow not really did my homework, but I received an email from a Korean/American girl who got my email address because her parents, which we visited when we were in Korea, are old friends/colleagues of my parents, and she is currently an exchange student in Paris. We had a brunch last Sunday, and it was awesome, very nice girl . So, I proposed we go climbing together. I hope it will go well, since she has never climb before. But still sounded way better than proposing a movie or a visit to a museum !
In Grenoble I would have proposed a Via Ferrata as it is basically climbing, but easy mode. But well, it seems there are none around Paris (see http://www.laviaferrata.net/carte-via-ferrata.php ).
Now that will make me practice my oral English .

Good luck with that Hybrid, hope it goes well!

Probably another point related to my experience. Don't ask why they said no, just accept it and move on. Asking will drive you mad and make it look like you needed it more.

I might be wrong in that approach, but I just take it on the chin and think "oh well, feth it." NEXT!

Nice! Good job Hybrid!!!

Going on a date tomorrow with this girl I've thought was cute for 5 years. Going out to lunch and then a shooting range. She's never gone shooting a day in her life.
>I'm a jock looking guy, shaved head, muscle.
>She has long black hair, pale, goth kind of chick.
We're very different in so many ways. I'm normally very good when it comes to conversation. Except when it comes to her. I don't know what it is but my mind is just blank all the time when I'm with her.
If I can get my gak together then I think we'll have fun. So Dakka, any tips?

 poppa G wrote:
So Dakka, any tips?

Don't over-think it. There's no gimmick that will make your date a success if you're not the person she's looking for, so just relax and be yourself. If you start looking for "winning strategies" and all that nonsense the best possible outcome is that it takes her a bit longer to realize that she's not interested, and there's a good chance that you're so busy trying to find the perfect thing to do that you just make an awkward mess of it.

What Peregrine said (the only time I think I'm ever going to say that). Unfortunately, that advice isn't really practical in terms of helping you have an actual conversation, but it is what it is.

My best suggestion is think about what common ground you have (i.e. who do you know mutually, how do you know eachother, what sort of common interests do you have), start a conversation based on that common ground, and let it flow from there naturally.


Automatically Appended Next Post:
So last night I had a woman (I'd say she was in her mid-30s) approach me to tell me that I look exactly like a younger version of her husband ... (its true, I do, really scary, even has a similar scar on his forehead), she was asking me how old I was and if I was single, etc. kinda threw me off a bit. I dont *think* she was flirting with me, more trying to see if she could set me up with a friend, but it kinda through me off...

We (and some other NJ Devils fans at the bar) ended up discussing, amongst other things, how hockey-fangirls are the best, to which I said something to the effect of "Agreed, nothin sexier than a fine lady in a Devils jersey... the problem is I cant find any that are single." A girl in the corner piped in "Thanks. you're pretty hot, too." Then the guy sitting next to her leaned out from behind her while laughing, "I'm her husband!"

If you want to hav ea good conversation, end everything you say with an open-ended question. This is a question that can not be answered with a yes or no.

Then, actively listen to the answer. Ask an open ended question that relates to her answer.

For example:
You- "Hey, great shot. So since you've never been shooting before, what do you normally go out and do?"

Her- "I usually just sit around the house and watch TV."

You- "Huh, got any suggestions on what I should be watching?"

Her- "Not sure. I really like soap operas?"

You- "Soap Operas? What do you like about Soap Operas?"
****************************

I think I have made my point.

Well fellas, it went great! There wasn't any awkward silences where I didn't know what to say.
Shot a fully auto RPD, FS200 and P90. 50$ a drum, holy balls haha. And, I think she likes me...She blushed a lot when I did certain things.

you did good poppa G, you did good.

Plans to see her again?

 sebster wrote:
Getting a date is a numbers game. If you approach more women, you'll find yourself meeting more girls you take an interest in, and the more of them you ask out for a coffee, the more who will say yes.

That is, of course, harder than it sounds, because for most of us rejection is pretty hard to take. The challenge is, like Albatross says, in just not giving a feth.

This is something I actually only figured when, of all places, my search of the internet for all truly crazy things took me to the Pick Up Artist community. Now these guys are really creepy and most of their ideas range between weird and completely insane, but the funny is that they have a much better success rate with women than a lot of guys. The interesting thing is that they get this success despite their their games and theories being incredibly stupid... but in focusing on games and method, they stop the pick up being personal - if a girl says no it is just a failure of their method, not a personal rejection. As a result, they can approach dozens of girls and not worry when they get turned down, because sooner or later a girl will say yes.

The trick is how to get that mindset without picking up any of the PUA community's misogyny. To learn to just move on when a girl says no. It isn't ever easier, but it gets easier with age, and easier the more you try it.

Girls say no
25 years married now, so must have done something right.

 Devoted-to-the-machine wrote:
You are going to statistically meet your mate in one of two places, work or school. .

Citation needed.

I always show my models to girls when i talk, it really works! There always impressed with my Chinese design even if i don't think i've done it very well! I even got my ex into dark eldar and she would come to the shop to paint and play twice a week. I've even bring girls who i wasn't in a real relationship with at the time (if you catch my drift) and they enjoyed it too. (I had a good time that night). These girls were really out of my league too. I guess bringing them to a games workshop proved i was secure with who i am and what i do. Both girls said they admired me for doing so .

 Gitsmasher wrote:

 Devoted-to-the-machine wrote:
You are going to statistically meet your mate in one of two places, work or school. .

Citation needed.

Those are the two places where most people spend most of their lives.

 Avatar 720 wrote:

 Gitsmasher wrote:

 Devoted-to-the-machine wrote:
You are going to statistically meet your mate in one of two places, work or school. .

Citation needed.

Those are the two places where most people spend most of their lives.

I've seen the opposite most people I've met from traveling around the world met their significant other, through friends, and social events. Not school or work.

But I merely asked for the source of devoted's statiscitcs.

Why is this thread any longer than simply saying, "ask"?

Well mainly because a lot of people have trouble with just asking for a start, like when, how and what to actually say, so theres a lot of discussion on that. Plus the discussions on what to actually do on a date etc. Its a good thread

Medium of Death wrote:Good luck with that Hybrid, hope it goes well!

chaos0xomega wrote:Nice! Good job Hybrid!!!

Thanks!
I think it went quite well on the climbing front : she learned to do the figure-eight knot, she learned to belay, she did what we call «école de vol» in French (jumping off the wall just as an exercise so when you actually fall, you are more confident), she was able to do 5A climbing routes (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grade_%28climbing%29#Free_climbing_2 ) with relative ease, and she went halfway through 5B climbing routes ! This is pretty good for a first time, I guess. Next time she should try lead climbing.
On the date front, though… I do not know, I am quite clueless . Actually, I do not even know if she has a boyfriend or not .

So I'm going over to that girl's house today, the one I took on a date recently mentioned in this thread. It is tonight I break the barrier between friend and lover. Upon seeing her I will initiate a hug, slightly longer than other ones. If she sits down on the couch first I will sit close to her, close enough to pull her in to cuddle during the horror film. No words are necessary I think.
1. If I sit down first then I'll have to tell her to come sit by me, maybe I'll pull the 'I'm scared of horror movies/card".
2. If she turns me down to cuddle...hm. I could ask if she's a lesbian? I've never really been turned down for this so I'm not sure how to react...

Anyways, the point of tonight is to see if there's mutual attraction. And to make clear that I find her attractive.

I know pretty much nothing about dating, however I can tell you this.

There is absolutely no good outcome whatsoever that can happen from asking a girl you're attracted to if she's a lesbian. None whatsoever.

 poppa G wrote:
No words are necessary I think.

Yeah, it's much easier if you just pull someone in and exploit their reluctance to make an awkward situation by resisting too much. Why bother using words when that's so much harder and more open to failure?

2. If she turns me down to cuddle...hm. I could ask if she's a lesbian?

Well, if you want to earn a reputation as "that creepy guy" or "that " and don't have any hopes for the future with this person, great idea.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:
Actually, I do not even know if she has a boyfriend or not .

Why not just ask?

Update- Didn't ask her out yet, week went badly so never got the chance.

 Peregrine wrote:

 poppa G wrote:
No words are necessary I think.

Yeah, it's much easier if you just pull someone in and exploit their reluctance to make an awkward situation by resisting too much. Why bother using words when that's so much harder and more open to failure?

2. If she turns me down to cuddle...hm. I could ask if she's a lesbian?

Well, if you want to earn a reputation as "that creepy guy" or "that " and don't have any hopes for the future with this person, great idea.


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:
Actually, I do not even know if she has a boyfriend or not .

Why not just ask?

The lesbian part was a joke btw
Anyways, about the pulling her in part. In the world of business and sales there's something called "assuming the sale". Basically you just assume that they will buy your product, you assume that they're interested. So you just move forward. If you ask a yes or no question there's a bigger chance that they'll say no. That's why it's better to not ask those type of questions. Do you see what I'm getting at? If you ask and she says no there will still be that awkwardness there. If you put yourself out there there will always be a chance for rejection, that awkwardness. Whether it be in action or through words. So Pere, where's your problem with my method, again?