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 hotsauceman1 wrote:

My weight has never been anything I thought about beyond health problems(Which is why im trying to shed the pounds) At many a gaming club or tournaments, I met large people who had very attractive GF. I learned weight is not an issue unless you are so big you need two seats. Im also very tal(5.9) so my weight is less of a problem. And I have dropped down pants sizes in the last month.

Unless you live in India or something, 5.9 feet (I say feet because I can't think of any other measurement you're using that would fit) is by no stretch of the imagination "very tall".

I just looked it up, average height for a male in the usa is 5 feet and 9.5 inches. so if someone is 5'9", they are shorter than average, not "very tall'

 Void__Dragon wrote:


Unless you live in India or something, 5.9 feet (I say feet because I can't think of any other measurement you're using that would fit) is by no stretch of the imagination "very tall".

if he's 5.9 fathoms tall, that's......pretty tall.

One time I got aroused while watching nurse sharks fornicate in Marine Biology.

I was dicking around on a dating site and there was this girl who said she loved the movie Labyrinth, fair enough so I send her the line "You remind me of the babe" (the same way I send Anchorman quotes should anyone ever reference it-and its like no one else has seen that movie, cause I am always first)
Needless to say I have to thank David Bowie for getting me a date

You know the recent content of the thread reminds me of this one SOB in High School, kinda ugly, short, etc. However he was ALWAYS on dates with absolute knock outs, now the guy could smooth talk his way around a lot of stuff, but I found his major "trick" was simply having no fear or rejection and just asking. Sure his batting average for actual hits was low as hell, but if every fifth time you swing you hit a home run as opposed to bunting and barely making 1st base (this is where this analogy gets confusing due to other base ball relationship analogies already in use) then you won't be having the worst season ja?

It's also how I FINALLY got the date, two dates as it happens with my fantasy girl. The chick I'd been crushing on since middle school, now I'd asked her out before, or tried any way, it was a mess don't ask, but I get back from boot camp, see her again, and just walk up and ask her, no nerves or stuttering, just talk to her normally and ask her out. Now it turns out she was a complete but that's just reality kicking fantasy twixt the uprights, which is perfectly normal. She also believed really hard core in that 2012 nonsense which was more then enough to make me question still being her friend, much less asking her out again.

Throwing a wide net is a perfectly valid strategy in the game of love, yeah.

 Void__Dragon wrote:
One time I got aroused while watching nurse sharks fornicate in Marine Biology.

were they wearing nurse uniforms? because i can get behind that

jewels wrote:
Im married now, but back when i was single i HATED it when I found out good guy friends of mine had started out wanting to date me and i never knew.

reason one, because if we have been good friends for a while it makes me second guess the friendship- i think, "oh i thought we were really close...and all those friendship moments we shared were fake because you were just trying to get with me!? why weren't you just upfront to start with?"

reason two, because maybe i would have liked them back but now it is awkward and i just see them as a friend and so we'll never find out what could have happened. And if i didn't like them that way, we could have just gotten that out of the way and went on to be just friends.

It depends on how it's done. If you don't make a move within a few weeks, then yes, you're turning into the nice guy/friendzone scenario, where the girl finds out after a year that the friend has a crush on her. That's awkward for them.

The flip side is that going out with someone socially a few times before letting on that you're interested is not a bad thing to do. If you're looking for something long term, or you're just uncertain, it can give you a chance to scope out the opposition, so to speak.

 Albatross wrote:

 Medium of Death wrote:


This is some crossover from the "fat Americans" thread. It really depends on how you carry that weight. It doesn't matter terribly if your tall or built but weigh more. It'll probably look proportionally fine. Which I'm sure it does on yourself, you stallion you. It's when you're fairly short and fat or just morbidly obese that it becomes an instant visual problem.

Yeah, I'm inclined to agree with you, though that problem is not insurmountable, and thinking that way certainly doesn't make a person 'delusional'. Calling a person with weight issues 'delusional' for thinking they might have a shot with a girl they fancy definitely does make you a bit of a knobhead though. I don't mean you, just, y'know, putting it out there.

True. I guess there's advice and then there's advice with tact.

 Albatross wrote:
I don't meet women and go 'hey, fancy going out for a drink then back to mine so you can sit on my face?'

I can confirm that this line didn't work. More or less word for word.

jewels wrote:
Im married now, but back when i was single i HATED it when I found out good guy friends of mine had started out wanting to date me and i never knew.

reason one, because if we have been good friends for a while it makes me second guess the friendship- i think, "oh i thought we were really close...and all those friendship moments we shared were fake because you were just trying to get with me!? why weren't you just upfront to start with?"

reason two, because maybe i would have liked them back but now it is awkward and i just see them as a friend and so we'll never find out what could have happened. And if i didn't like them that way, we could have just gotten that out of the way and went on to be just friends.

It must be devastating to find out people had an interest in you. Allow me to play you a song of solace.

You do realise that emotions can change towards are person over time, right? Otherwise what Ketara said.

 Ketara wrote:

jewels wrote:
Im married now, but back when i was single i HATED it when I found out good guy friends of mine had started out wanting to date me and i never knew.

reason one, because if we have been good friends for a while it makes me second guess the friendship- i think, "oh i thought we were really close...and all those friendship moments we shared were fake because you were just trying to get with me!? why weren't you just upfront to start with?"

reason two, because maybe i would have liked them back but now it is awkward and i just see them as a friend and so we'll never find out what could have happened. And if i didn't like them that way, we could have just gotten that out of the way and went on to be just friends.

It depends on how it's done. If you don't make a move within a few weeks, then yes, you're turning into the nice guy/friendzone scenario, where the girl finds out after a year that the friend has a crush on her. That's awkward for them.

The flip side is that going out with someone socially a few times before letting on that you're interested is not a bad thing to do. If you're looking for something long term, or you're just uncertain, it can give you a chance to scope out the opposition, so to speak.

Yep, that's exactly my thinking. It sort of gives you a 'run-up' as opposed to trying to engineer a romance from a standing start. If romance was already on the cards, asking the girl out would be a mere formality, as they would already have done a bit of flirting and would know that they were interested in each other. That doesn't appear to be the case here, so hotsauce needs to engineer 'safe' ways to spend time with this girl, with a view to cultivating that interest and acting upon it by unambiguously asking the girl out on a date. I really think that's gonna be his best shot.

So that chick I mentioned prior who I'm friends with on facebook despite never having met in person... she messaged me... AGAIN, and predictably, she stopped responding within two messages of starting the conversation... how the hell does she expect me to chat her up/ask her out if she's being such a flake (and a really Basic one at that)?

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
Ok, how about "Would you like to get lunch sometime? Or Maybe some coffee?"

Say, "Let' get lunch sometime. What works better Tuesday or Thursday around noon?"

Ok, Well im going to do it today, im off to work in an hour. Im just worried, it is overcast and they might want to cut some people in beer, My only chance might be asking her out before work. Wish me luck and courage

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
Ok, Well im going to do it today, im off to work in an hour. Im just worried, it is overcast and they might want to cut some people in beer, My only chance might be asking her out before work. Wish me luck and courage

Good luck!

 Nevelon wrote:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
Ok, Well im going to do it today, im off to work in an hour. Im just worried, it is overcast and they might want to cut some people in beer, My only chance might be asking her out before work. Wish me luck and courage

Good luck!

Grow a pair!

Being around my height and 100 pounds heavier when I'm unhealthily overweight is a bad thing, and will cause the pool of available women/men/androids to shrink.

chaos0xomega wrote:
So that chick I mentioned prior who I'm friends with on facebook despite never having met in person... she messaged me... AGAIN, and predictably, she stopped responding within two messages of starting the conversation... how the hell does she expect me to chat her up/ask her out if she's being such a flake (and a really Basic one at that)?

She's not worth it; if you're only FB friends for the dating potential then unfriend her and go about your business. From what you've said I can't imagine that you've stayed her friend for the conversational value.

yeah, no thats pretty much the only reason im friends with her (dating potential) lol

MrDwhitey wrote:Being around my height and 100 pounds heavier when I'm unhealthily overweight is a bad thing, and will cause the pool of available women/men/androids to shrink.

He's big boned. His words, not mine.

chaos0xomega wrote:yeah, no thats pretty much the only reason im friends with her (dating potential) lol

Good luck. I've scored that way before actually, but we also had conversations that lasted more than two messages lmao.

yeah, she keeps messaging me like "Hey Chris, whats up?" pretty much without fail once a week every monday or tuesday for the past month, I respond back with something to begin getting a conversation going, she usually responds (but not in a really meaningful way), I follow up, and then... the cycle repeats the next week. I'm wondering if she has amnesia or something like in Fifty First Dates or whatever that movie was called. It'd be a bit more tolerable if there was some continuity to our messaging, but every time she messages me its basically a start over from "hi, whats up".

At this point, the only reason I havent removed her and/or given up on talking to her, is because I have trouble believing that anyone could be that basic.

Maybe she just doesn't find you that interesting?


Automatically Appended Next Post:

 hotsauceman1 wrote:
Ok, Well im going to do it today, im off to work in an hour. Im just worried, it is overcast and they might want to cut some people in beer, My only chance might be asking her out before work. Wish me luck and courage

Good luck.

A gentleman makes his own luck.

It seemed a more appropriate comment than "work on your social skills and drop some weight".

 Void__Dragon wrote:
It seemed a more appropriate comment than "work on your social skills and drop some weight".

I believe he's trying to do exactly that. Why not cut him a little slack, bro?

 Albatross wrote:

 Void__Dragon wrote:
It seemed a more appropriate comment than "work on your social skills and drop some weight".

I believe he's trying to do exactly that. Why not cut him a little slack, bro?

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

Obeisity is poorly explained. Im considered obese at 309lb. But Im not overly big. Im just naturally a big guy. Obese is considered 20lb over the ideal, which is too low to begin with.

5'9" is very tall...

He's in denial about at least that much Albatross. Out of curiosity, how tall are you? I picture you as at least being 6'4".

 Albatross wrote:

I believe he's trying to do exactly that. Why not cut him a little slack, bro?

I'm not trying to put him down.

If he puts himself out there and builds up experience talking to women (Even if it's mostly just getting rejected at first) and if he continues to drop pounds (He's dropped a few pant sizes already) then yeah, he'll have more success with women.

 trexmeyer wrote:

 Albatross wrote:

 Void__Dragon wrote:
It seemed a more appropriate comment than "work on your social skills and drop some weight".

I believe he's trying to do exactly that. Why not cut him a little slack, bro?

 hotsauceman1 wrote:

Obeisity is poorly explained. Im considered obese at 309lb. But Im not overly big. Im just naturally a big guy. Obese is considered 20lb over the ideal, which is too low to begin with.

5'9" is very tall...

He's in denial about at least that much Albatross. Out of curiosity, how tall are you? I picture you as at least being 6'4".

Yep, pretty much. 6' 3" and some change, if I'm being honest. I weigh about 250lbs.

I take your point on hotsauce's height/weight ratio, I just think it was a little harsh to imply that he was 'delusional'. I've never seen him - for all we know, he could have a similar build to me, i.e. broad, stocky, sort of rugby player build. A lot of chicks dig that, you know...

Just sayin'.

And I'm 5'10" and 250 pounds. While a good deal of it is and has for most of my teenage to adult life been muscle (I have the typical linebacker's build I've been told), I'm still fat and I am well-aware it's often a detriment to my physical attractiveness (Though in my opinion my dashing good-looks, beautiful hair, gorgeous eyes, strong figure and overpowering force of personality compensate for it wonderfully).

At 6'3", 250 pounds isn't hugely fat. Judging by what I assume to be your photo you only look a bit chubby, not as proportionately big as I or hotsauceman. I don't think it's mean to point out to hotsauceman that dropping some pounds would help his chances with women.

 Albatross wrote:

Yep, pretty much. 6' 3" and some change, if I'm being honest.

Really? I could have sworn you were about 6' 1' when we met, with Matty being a bit shorter than me. My memory is clearly blown already. Time to check into the old folks home...