Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:
No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
Times and dates in your local timezone.
Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.
If you are already a member then feel free to login now.
Rainbow Dash wrote: People just dislike me... I donno what it is, but I loose friends on a regular basis, or they'll just say something really cruel to me for no reason.
I remember once I was playing halo with a friend and did a stupid dance and she said I looked anorexic because, I think I rolled up my sleeves and I don't generally not wear something large because I am pretty thin...
Needless to day, I bring out the worst in people.
And to be fair... the first two I was given the old toss (once so she could go to work, a call in, and another so she could study) those ones were pretty bad this one was...well normal meh date.
Out of the three, this one made me feel the least bad.
Well, I'm starting to dislike you just because all the woe is me negativity you're spewing... Heres some advice: people like positive people. They like hanging around positive people because positive feelings and thoughts make other people feel positive, if you're not being positive you're being negative, and nobody wants to hang with a negative nancy, so stop being negative.
I mean people often respond better to my "normal act"...but I feel miserable since, I am showing so little of myself and always walk on egg shells, trying to act proper and it spirals out of control and I become extremely angry and depressed and just fall apart.
So it's either I have fake happiness and someone likes a fake person (for as long as I can hack it), or I am myself and happy with that, but alone as everyone is put off by that.
Have you ever concsidered that, maybe, you can do your normal act when you start dating and slowly, as you get to know eachother, reveal more and more of your weirdness, etc? Generally speaking, most people will respond fairly well to weirdness if you don't serve it up to them all at once.
Rainbow Dash wrote: Yeah but with someone like me who is already socially awkward and just all around awkward, I have to tone everything down, always.
It's one or the other, because I can't just let a bit in because that little bit alone is crazy.
My overall personality is weird, like I'm a weird person.
I'm cool with that and enjoy what I love, no one else does, but I still derive some happiness in my life.
Just alone. Everything I do really I do by myself.
It'd be different if I was just some run of the mill gamer but I am not I am far more...odd then that (though I dislike video games)... So it's not as easy as that.
I'm sure youre not as much as a special snowflake as you think you are. TBH you sound like a teen/young adult, overly self centered but still exceptionally insecure. I mean ffs a few pages ago you mentioned you lost your v-card, clearly you're not as inept, weird, or unlikable as you think.
CoALabaer wrote: Wargamers hate two things: the state of the game and change.
You know I couldn't give less of a gak what you think of me personally. You can bitch about my ideas, and attitude and stuff, that's fair, I mean I put it up for you to read, but I don't care about your opinions towards me as a person.
If you don't like me that much, there's an ignore button.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2014/12/13 01:58:52
Make Dolls Great Again
Clover/Trump 2016
For the United Shelves of America!
Rainbow Dash wrote: My overall personality is weird, like I'm a weird person.
How? What is so weird about you compared to other people who have success with dating? So far you haven't really said anything that would allow you to get useful advice on what to do differently. Are you even looking for advice, or are you just here for sympathy about having a few typical bad dates?
There is no such thing as a hobby without politics. "Leave politics at the door" is itself a political statement, an endorsement of the status quo and an attempt to silence dissenting voices.
Rainbow Dash wrote: You know I couldn't give less of a gak what you think of me personally. You can bitch about my ideas, and attitude and stuff, that's fair, I mean I put it up for you to read, but I don't care about your opinions towards me as a person.
If you don't like me that much, there's an ignore button.
He's trying to give you some decent advice. Not rub your ego. I'm quite sure he doesn't really give two damns about you as a person, he's never met you, and likely never will. You made a post asking for some advice/opinions, and got it. The phrase is 'constructive criticism'.
Rainbow Dash wrote: My overall personality is weird, like I'm a weird person.
How? What is so weird about you compared to other people who have success with dating? So far you haven't really said anything that would allow you to get useful advice on what to do differently. Are you even looking for advice, or are you just here for sympathy about having a few typical bad dates?
I read a lot of advice that has been given, and what is different about me...as much as an embarrassment to even bring it up, there's the whole aspergers thing I have, so I would say that first and foremost.
As per questions a lot of the ones I had, have been answered, I read a lot of the past posts ... of course I could have said that earlier, my bad.
Rainbow Dash wrote: You know I couldn't give less of a gak what you think of me personally. You can bitch about my ideas, and attitude and stuff, that's fair, I mean I put it up for you to read, but I don't care about your opinions towards me as a person.
If you don't like me that much, there's an ignore button.
He's trying to give you some decent advice. Not rub your ego. I'm quite sure he doesn't really give two damns about you as a person, he's never met you, and likely never will. You made a post asking for some advice/opinions, and got it. The phrase is 'constructive criticism'.
I was more annoyed at he beginning it with "I am starting to dislike you"
would seem he does give a damn about me as a person or else he wouldn't have put that there before anything else.
This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at 2014/12/13 02:23:11
Make Dolls Great Again
Clover/Trump 2016
For the United Shelves of America!
I was more annoyed at he beginning it with "I am starting to dislike you"
would seem he does.
In his day to day life, I'm sure he really couldn't care less. If he genuinely disliked you, he wouldn't be trying to give you advice. But he's communicating what your past posts are making him feel, which is mild irritation. And he's extrapolating (probably not inaccurately) that if you do that to him, you're probably doing it to others as well, so he's advising you to perk up a bit.
This message was edited 3 times. Last update was at 2014/12/13 02:28:34
I read a lot of advice that has been given, and what is different about me...as much as an embarrassment to even bring it up, there's the whole aspergers thing I have, so I would say that first and foremost.
Aspergers is a handicap, but just that. For most, it just means you need to work a little harder at things, not that you're incapable of them. Too many people simply use it as a self-justifying cop-out of an excuse. I'm not saying that of you personally, but it is a mentality I've seen all too many with the condition fall into.
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2014/12/13 02:29:07
I was more annoyed at he beginning it with "I am starting to dislike you"
would seem he does.
In his day to day life, I'm sure he really couldn't care less. If he genuinely disliked you, he wouldn't be trying to give you advice. But he's communicating what your past posts are making him feel, which is mild irritation. And he's extrapolating (probably not inaccurately) that if you do that to him, you're probably doing it to others as well, so he's advising you to perk up a bit.
There's where you're wrong, I am certain he is in my laundry hamper with a crossbow!...
but seriously, yes I have known many people to use it as a handicap. I try my best not to, I get moody as hell but...it's a lifelong process of personal building and progression.
Make Dolls Great Again
Clover/Trump 2016
For the United Shelves of America!
but seriously, yes I have known many people to use it as a handicap. I try my best not to, I get moody as hell but...it's a lifelong process of personal building and progression.
Damn straight it is. Yes, it will impair your ability to build relationships with people, platonic and otherwise. But it doesn't make it impossible. Hold onto that fact, keep working at it, and you will get somewhere.
chaos0xomega wrote: Heres some advice: people like positive people. They like hanging around positive people because positive feelings and thoughts make other people feel positive, if you're not being positive you're being negative, and nobody wants to hang with a negative nancy, so stop being negative.
Plenty of people don't let that get in the way of success at dating. Next excuse?
There is no such thing as a hobby without politics. "Leave politics at the door" is itself a political statement, an endorsement of the status quo and an attempt to silence dissenting voices.
chaos0xomega wrote: Heres some advice: people like positive people. They like hanging around positive people because positive feelings and thoughts make other people feel positive, if you're not being positive you're being negative, and nobody wants to hang with a negative nancy, so stop being negative.
Yep, we've been saying this. It's just a fact.
What about hiding the fact you are actually very depressed inside, while pretending to be perfectly fine? Is that okay?
"Our fantasy settings are grim and dark, but that is not a reflection of who we are or how we feel the real world should be. [...] We will continue to diversify the cast of characters we portray [...] so everyone can find representation and heroes they can relate to. [...] If [you don't feel the same way], you will not be missed"
https://twitter.com/WarComTeam/status/1268665798467432449/photo/1
chaos0xomega wrote: Heres some advice: people like positive people. They like hanging around positive people because positive feelings and thoughts make other people feel positive, if you're not being positive you're being negative, and nobody wants to hang with a negative nancy, so stop being negative.
Yep, we've been saying this. It's just a fact.
What about hiding the fact you are actually very depressed inside, while pretending to be perfectly fine? Is that okay?
virginity, v card means you're a virgin
Make Dolls Great Again
Clover/Trump 2016
For the United Shelves of America!
Oh. And if I recall correctly, you are quite younger than I am, while I still have my v-card. See, Peregrine is right, clearly you are no as inept, weird, or unlikable as you some other people. .
"Our fantasy settings are grim and dark, but that is not a reflection of who we are or how we feel the real world should be. [...] We will continue to diversify the cast of characters we portray [...] so everyone can find representation and heroes they can relate to. [...] If [you don't feel the same way], you will not be missed"
https://twitter.com/WarComTeam/status/1268665798467432449/photo/1
Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote: Oh. And if I recall correctly, you are quite younger than I am, while I still have my v-card. See, Peregrine is right, clearly you are no as inept, weird, or unlikable as you some other people. .
still haven't made it with my own gender... a new years goal though...insanely easy...
Make Dolls Great Again
Clover/Trump 2016
For the United Shelves of America!
"Our fantasy settings are grim and dark, but that is not a reflection of who we are or how we feel the real world should be. [...] We will continue to diversify the cast of characters we portray [...] so everyone can find representation and heroes they can relate to. [...] If [you don't feel the same way], you will not be missed"
https://twitter.com/WarComTeam/status/1268665798467432449/photo/1
You can reap all you want.
Did I seemed to imply otherwise?
"Our fantasy settings are grim and dark, but that is not a reflection of who we are or how we feel the real world should be. [...] We will continue to diversify the cast of characters we portray [...] so everyone can find representation and heroes they can relate to. [...] If [you don't feel the same way], you will not be missed"
https://twitter.com/WarComTeam/status/1268665798467432449/photo/1
I can't be the only one who is incredibly confused right now...
Mandorallen turned back toward the insolently sneering baron. 'My Lord,' The great knight said distantly, 'I find thy face apelike and thy form misshapen. Thy beard, moreover, is an offence against decency, resembling more closely the scabrous fur which doth decorate the hinder portion of a mongrel dog than a proper adornment for a human face. Is it possibly that thy mother, seized by some wild lechery, did dally at some time past with a randy goat?' - Mimbrate Knight Protector Mandorallen.
Excerpt from "Seeress of Kell", Book Five of The Malloreon series by David Eddings.
"You need not fear us, unless you are a dark heart, a vile one who preys on the innocent; I promise, you can’t hide forever in the empty darkness, for we will hunt you down like the animals you are, and pull you into the very bowels of hell." Iron - Within Temptation
"Our fantasy settings are grim and dark, but that is not a reflection of who we are or how we feel the real world should be. [...] We will continue to diversify the cast of characters we portray [...] so everyone can find representation and heroes they can relate to. [...] If [you don't feel the same way], you will not be missed"
https://twitter.com/WarComTeam/status/1268665798467432449/photo/1
Read it again. "sorry YOU can't reap the rewards of bisexuality? ". What he's saying is "too bad you're not bi or you could have all the hot men like I get".
There is no such thing as a hobby without politics. "Leave politics at the door" is itself a political statement, an endorsement of the status quo and an attempt to silence dissenting voices.
Read it again. "sorry YOU can't reap the rewards of bisexuality? ". What he's saying is "too bad you're not bi or you could have all the hot men like I get".
more the potential... as I said about my new years resolution...which also includes getting a banjo.
Make Dolls Great Again
Clover/Trump 2016
For the United Shelves of America!
Aspergers... one of my good friends from college has Aspergers, I had the privelege of being the groomsman at his wedding a couple months ago, out of all my married (or otherwise not-single friends), he definitely pulled in the biggest catch. Im talking like 9.5 out of 10 on the babe scale, on top of that shes one of the nicest, most down to earth, and most intelligent people I know (she has a masters in aerospace engineering, launches rockets for a living, and is in the application process for becoming an astdonaut). If I said I wasnt extrmeley envious Id be lying.
Point is, its not as big an obstacle as you think... and trust me the dude is plenty "weird" himself.
CoALabaer wrote: Wargamers hate two things: the state of the game and change.
Peregrine wrote: Read it again. "sorry YOU can't reap the rewards of bisexuality? ". What he's saying is "too bad you're not bi or you could have all the hot men like I get".
Oh, okay. I misunderstood it as a general “you”, similar to “one”. Sorry. I am still confused about how Rainbow Dash can know it to be so easy if he never have done it yet, and not sure I would have more success with men…
This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2014/12/13 12:56:32
"Our fantasy settings are grim and dark, but that is not a reflection of who we are or how we feel the real world should be. [...] We will continue to diversify the cast of characters we portray [...] so everyone can find representation and heroes they can relate to. [...] If [you don't feel the same way], you will not be missed"
https://twitter.com/WarComTeam/status/1268665798467432449/photo/1
.