This is the turtle pie blogg

Forum adverts like this one are shown to any user who is not logged in. Join us by filling out a tiny 3 field form and you will get your own, free, dakka user account which gives a good range of benefits to you:

No adverts like this in the forums anymore.
Times and dates in your local timezone.
Full tracking of what you have read so you can skip to your first unread post, easily see what has changed since you last logged in, and easily see what is new at a glance.
Email notifications for threads you want to watch closely.
Being a part of the oldest wargaming community on the net.

If you are already a member then feel free to login now.

**Shrike78**

What role should turtle pie play in warhammer 40k?

if you do not understand the post, or how it relates to 40k, read the top 3 posts made by Ahiriman

The following is a list of the members, and rank of those in the Church of the Children of Turtle Pie

Mekboy- Saint

God Of Yams- Saint

Nofasse 'Eadhunta - Saint

focusedfire - Scholar

Happygrunt- Zealot Protectorus

BrotherStynier- Acolyte

**Typeline**

I say two slices, because I don't want to eat three and look like a fatty. I also don't want to have only one slice and someone start calling me a little girl because I can't stomach the turtle pie and don't want to get all fat from it.

Pic half way related

**God Of Yams**

Anyone who knows anything about turtle pie knows that it is nothing without it's guardians.

Mr. T and Chuck Norris not only protect the turtle pie from us, they protect us from the turtle pie.

**Nofasse 'Eadhunta**

And any who know of it's guardians also know of their enemies who plan to take the turtle pie and use it's power for their own vile agendas.

Robotnik is the best known so far, he and his PENGISH plot every day to defeat the guardians and take the turtle pie so he can finally destroy Sonic.

Now about he Chaos Gods and their desire for turtle pie;

Khorne can't have some, he is a bad boy and he doesn't say 'please.'

Nurgle can have some I guess, he's a good guy.

Tzeentch can't decide whether he wants some or not. We'll just leave him alone for now.

Slaanesh secretly took some and caressed himself with it and rolled around in it and did a whole bunch of other creepy stuff with it so he can't have some. He has defiled the turtle pie code of conduct and this must be why the Eldar are after him.

**Shrike78**

Nofasse 'Eadhunta wrote:

Slaanesh secretly took some and caressed himself with it and rolled around in it and did a whole bunch of other creepy stuff with it so he can't have some. He has defiled the turtle pie code of conduct and this must be why the Eldar are after him.

Whip cream anyone?

**Orkeosaurus**

Turtles should go first. They should always have gone first!

I'm really sick of GW, and the way they always put the pie before the turtle. Fifth Edition was a perfect example of this; they just pied down all the rules, and there's no turtle left at all.

Now we got people making cheesy lists, and all they care about is pie. Well I'm sorry if us friendly gamers care about a little bit about the turtles in our 40k.

GW's really let down the gaming community.

Just the other day one of their employees called me "sir."

**Pariah Press**

Turtle should obviously go first! It's right there in the name fer chrissakes!

**Reaper6**

Ah, the eternally tormenting question. Which came first, the Turtle or the Pie.

**God Of Yams**

I have to ask, what is the X variable in the last answer?

**Nofasse 'Eadhunta**

X like the Wraithguard gun; kills everything on 2s muahahahahahaha

**focusedfire**

3.14+Turtle=Eternal Turtle Pie

Eternal Turtle Pie contains the power cosmic thus is created:

The Emperors Turtles and Emperors Pies SMs chapters with Primarch Chuck Norris and Primarch Mr. T

**God Of Yams**

We've found the two lost Primarchs!

**warpcrafter**

Shrike78 wrote:What role should turtle pie play in warhammer 40k?

if you do not understand the post, or how it relates to 40k, read the top 3 posts made by Ahiriman

So, where are these magical posts?

**God Of Yams**

Here
http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/225539.page
Here
http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/217910.page
And Here
http://www.dakkadakka.com/dakkaforum/posts/list/225536.page

**Mekboy**

I, St. Mekboy, do declaire that Chuck Norris and Mr. T should play a bigger part in 40K, proteting the turtle pie from the foul xenos (especially those pansy Eldar). Those foul pie stealing Eldar need to be punished with righteous wrath. And yes, I am a Saint. It says so in the 2nd thread. Go me!

**P4NC4K3**

Science and stuff file 0189023891-Turtle Pie
Scientific name: Turtlus PIEICUS
Species: Pastry Reptile
Average lifespan: the time it takes to fart Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture
Reaches Sexual Maturity: Never
Natural Predators: Giant purple flying hippos (Hippopotamous PURPULUZ), who immobilise their prey by vomiting love hearts on them
Natural Prey: Common sense
Habitat: All of Ahiriman's Dakka Threads, Also often comes in boxes (with intent to invade) like this;

**warpcrafter**

Wow, and to think people are offended by the crap I post...

**God Of Yams**

I have great news!!!

I googled "40k turtles" and this thread was the top result

WIN

**Reaper6**

God Of Yams wrote:I have great news!!!

I googled "40k turtles" and this thread was the top result

WIN

VERIFIED ! I have just done it myself, and he's right !

**focusedfire**

God of Yams, your PIE-ousness will surely be rewarded

**Shrike78**

focusedfire wrote:God of Yams, your PIE-ousness will surely be rewarded

Wow... as chaplain of the Church of the Children of Turtle Pie, I am ashamed for having missed that

**Mekboy**

Yay! It's my post as well! That surely shows the turtle pie has chosen me for greatness...

**Shrike78**

My children!

Turtle Pie has chosen us all for greatness, all that is lft, is for us to choose ourselves.

Embrace the turtle pie!

Hey... we need to think of a substitue for Ahmen

**focusedfire**

AH-nyummy?

Our Turtle pie, Thou art heavenly,
By slice shall we serve.(Going to far?)

**foil7102**

Baskin Robbins Turtle pie is perhaps the best thing on earth, second only to easy women, and free beer.

**P4NC4K3**

What about tortoise pie?
Seriously, I can't believe nobody's locked this thread

**ArbitorIan**

Neither - since 5ed Pies are overpriced and turtles suck in KP missions.

GW evidently know nothing about wargaming. I'm switching to Warmachine. Hurr...

**God Of Yams**

P4NC4K3...

We have already combatted your heresy on another thread traitor!

Any further use of tortoise pie with be delt with swiftly and violently

(edited to show who I was talking at)

**focusedfire**

P4NC4K3 wrote:What about tortoise pie?
Seriously, I can't believe nobody's locked this thread

Why locked? We are in the proper forum, correct?

We are discussing a powerful rediscovered tool of the emprah. Standard template construct 3.14+turtle. Known as eternal turtle pie.

We are in the creative process of writing back story for 2 Homegrown SM chapters.

We have founded the 2 chapters and named the Primarchs.

Its not like we are playing with matches, running with scissors, or playing the tourettes game. donkey

......sorry about that, your turn

edited for additional line

**God Of Yams**

focusedfire wrote:

Why locked? We are in the proper forum, correct?

We are discussing a powerful rediscovered tool of the emprah. Standard template construct 3.14+turtle. Known as eternal turtle pie.

We are in the creative process of writing back story for 2 Homegrown SM chapters.

We have founded the 2 chapters and named the Primarchs.

Its not like we are playing with matches, running with scissors, or playing the tourettes game. donkey ......sorry about that, your turn

edited for additional line

So...Which space marine special character/HQ choices would be the best to count as Mr T or Chuck Norris and still provide the rules we want for the chapters?

I say Sicarius is Chuck, His coup de grace could easily be a roundhouse kick and he's all about lightning fast strikes and planning, just like a real Texas Ranger.