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Made in us
Bloodthirsty Chaos Knight




Las Vegas, NV

Granted. The bugs in your sandwich are bullet ants, bad bad poison. You're gonna die.

I wish the opening acts of the show I'm going to tonight didn't suck.

What's the matter, kid? Don't you like clowns? 
   
Made in nl
Raging Rat Ogre






Granted, It won't suck, but it is not very good either. The main show is going to suck harder than a deamonette on cocaine.

I wish tell everyone the secrets of the univers.

A hemophobic Khorne berzerker, a germophobic plague marine and a sexy Skaven walk in to a Games workshop.....
-------------------------------------------
We mark the lands with blood, in fire we prevail.
We are tremendous. We are the end of days.
-------------------------------------------
It ain't appropriate for anybody, baby. That's the siren call!
 
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. No one listens.

I wish to shoot a looter or ten.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in us
Stubborn Prosecutor





Granted. You aim at a looter, miss, and nail the number 10 in Sesame Street's short lived live action skit. Hundreds of parents are descending upon you home in hours.

I wish for an 8 hour nap

Bender wrote:* Realise that despite the way people talk, this is not a professional sport played by demi gods, but rather a game of toy soldiers played by tired, inebriated human beings.


https://www.victorwardbooks.com/ Home of Dark Days series 
   
Made in us
Bloodthirsty Chaos Knight




Las Vegas, NV

Granted but they're Jupiter hours and you'll wake up in about 10 years.

I wish I could go back in time and marry Salma Hayek when she was 25.

What's the matter, kid? Don't you like clowns? 
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. You go back in time and marry her but you get stuck back in time while everyone else advances. Tired of waiting for you, she runs off with the pool boy.

I wish to complete the comission soon.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in us
Bloodthirsty Chaos Knight




Las Vegas, NV

Granted but you won't get paid for a year.

I wish the world's best minis painters worked for me for free.

What's the matter, kid? Don't you like clowns? 
   
Made in us
Stubborn Prosecutor





Granted, but you'll be picked up for human trafficking in a week.

I wish for an airplane

Bender wrote:* Realise that despite the way people talk, this is not a professional sport played by demi gods, but rather a game of toy soldiers played by tired, inebriated human beings.


https://www.victorwardbooks.com/ Home of Dark Days series 
   
Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut




On a surly Warboar, leading the Waaagh!

Granted! Unfortunately it's one of the planes that went missing in the Bermuda Triangle and you're on it.


I wish the Pentagon would drop a ton of cash on a battery of the world's largest and deadliest slingshots capable of accurately firing an ICBM, or any other munition, to any point on the planet.

   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. No one is strong enough to pull the sling back to fire it.

I wish for free beer.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in us
Stubborn Prosecutor





Granted. You develop an alcohol allergy immediately afterwards.

I wish for a pet Ork.

Bender wrote:* Realise that despite the way people talk, this is not a professional sport played by demi gods, but rather a game of toy soldiers played by tired, inebriated human beings.


https://www.victorwardbooks.com/ Home of Dark Days series 
   
Made in us
Bloodthirsty Chaos Knight




Las Vegas, NV

Granted. He declares a whaaag on your house.

I wish the event list at Gateway was a little better.

What's the matter, kid? Don't you like clowns? 
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. It's perfect, but you cannot attend.

I wish for more thermite.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in us
Bloodthirsty Chaos Knight




Las Vegas, NV

Granted but they thought you said termites so you'll be looking at structural damage & infestation.

I wish the Star Wars Legion game was released today.

What's the matter, kid? Don't you like clowns? 
   
Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut




On a surly Warboar, leading the Waaagh!

Granted! The game, however, sucks! It sucks so bad that it's blamed for why Chicago is called 'The Windy City'. It sucks so bad that it's blamed for the wind velocity of Hurricane Harvey.

I wish I could play the piano better.
   
Made in us
Stubborn Prosecutor





Granted, but it cost you your hands.

BwHahhahahaha.
Ahem.

I wish for a good metalcore radio station in my area.

Bender wrote:* Realise that despite the way people talk, this is not a professional sport played by demi gods, but rather a game of toy soldiers played by tired, inebriated human beings.


https://www.victorwardbooks.com/ Home of Dark Days series 
   
Made in gb
Worthiest of Warlock Engineers






preston

Granted, but your radio's lose all power, and the atmospherics cause the transmissions to turn into gouts of static

I wish for a Soviet Commando Bear

Free from GW's tyranny and the hobby is looking better for it
DR:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Pww205++D++A+++/sWD146R++T(T)D+
 
   
Made in gb
Keeper of the Holy Orb of Antioch





avoiding the lorax on Crion

Granted. It's made out of eggs. Feathers and breaks easily.

I wish I had unlimited nulin oil supply.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/09/02 22:07:06


Sgt. Vanden - OOC Hey, that was your doing. I didn't choose to fly in the "Dongerprise'.

"May the odds be ever in your favour"

Hybrid Son Of Oxayotl wrote:
I have no clue how Dakka's moderation work. I expect it involves throwing a lot of d100 and looking at many random tables.

FudgeDumper - It could be that you are just so uncomfortable with the idea of your chapters primarch having his way with a docile tyranid spore cyst, that you must deny they have any feelings at all.  
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. You own it but it's on another planet.

I wish for some more shrimp.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in gb
Worthiest of Warlock Engineers






preston

Granted, you have more shrimp. Radioactive killer shrimp to be precise, and it might be time to start running about..... Now.

I wish I was on a hot date

Free from GW's tyranny and the hobby is looking better for it
DR:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Pww205++D++A+++/sWD146R++T(T)D+
 
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. Its 105 degrees in the shade.

I wish to make traffic move smoothly.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in cz
Mysterious Techpriest






Fortress world of Ostrakan

Granted. The traffic begins to move smoothly except the line you are in.

I wish I could nail a hammer to the wall.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/09/04 10:24:57



Neutran Panzergrenadiers, Ostrakan Skitarii Legions, Order of the Silver Hand
My fan-lore: Europan Planetary federation. Hot topic: Help with Minotaurs chapter Killteam






 
   
Made in us
Bloodthirsty Chaos Knight




Las Vegas, NV

Granted. You have to use your forehead to drive the nail in.

I wish the FoW Team Yankee army of miniatures I ordered last night would arrive today.


What's the matter, kid? Don't you like clowns? 
   
Made in gb
Worthiest of Warlock Engineers






preston

Granted. Unfortunately they are packed withing a lead lined casket containing heavily decayed Radium.

I wish I could paint like Angel Giraldez

Free from GW's tyranny and the hobby is looking better for it
DR:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Pww205++D++A+++/sWD146R++T(T)D+
 
   
Made in cz
Mysterious Techpriest






Fortress world of Ostrakan

Granted. You train painting your entire life, but in the end, you lose your job, your wife leaves you and your kids will not go to water the flowers on your grave because all you did your entire life was painting miniatures...

I wish to have a convertible sports car.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/09/04 21:24:42



Neutran Panzergrenadiers, Ostrakan Skitarii Legions, Order of the Silver Hand
My fan-lore: Europan Planetary federation. Hot topic: Help with Minotaurs chapter Killteam






 
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted. You let the top down when it rains and ruin the interior.

I wish my convertible sports car was a hardtop.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
Made in gb
Worthiest of Warlock Engineers






preston

Sure. The garage removes the soft top and replaces it with a solid concrete covering. 4 tons of steel and concrete later and your sports car collapses under its own weight.

I wish for more time

Free from GW's tyranny and the hobby is looking better for it
DR:90-S++G+++M++B++I+Pww205++D++A+++/sWD146R++T(T)D+
 
   
Made in cz
Mysterious Techpriest






Fortress world of Ostrakan

Granted. You fell into a pit trap. Now you have more time, but nothing to do.

I wish for a lawn mower.


Neutran Panzergrenadiers, Ostrakan Skitarii Legions, Order of the Silver Hand
My fan-lore: Europan Planetary federation. Hot topic: Help with Minotaurs chapter Killteam






 
   
Made in us
Longtime Dakkanaut




On a surly Warboar, leading the Waaagh!

Granted! It's a cast iron, manual push POS that hasn't seen oil or a sharpening in a century.

I wish one of these bad ass, mother-of-all-storms rambling around the oceans would hit North Korea. Where fat boy happens to be with his nuclear team at any given moment, to be precise.

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at 2017/09/06 01:47:40


 
   
Made in us
Dwarf Runelord Banging an Anvil





Way on back in the deep caves

Granted, I wish.

Trust in Iron and Stone  
   
 
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